THE GOLD MINE

BDC

You are about to embark on a journey to places you’ll never forget and experiences you’ll always remember. Told by the master story teller BDC.

What you are about to read is the second story in a series of short stories told by a story teller around a campfire. It’s important that you visualize this wise old man dressed in a western outfit reminiscing about his past experiences. Appreciate that fact that he’s not a writer he’s a teller of stories created by a vivid imagination. The first story in this series was about his adventures in Ragtown, Nevada and each new story is a continuation from the previous story. Ragtown was threatened by a gang of notorious bandits who raped the women, stole anything of value and killed anyone who tried to stop them.
The Gold Mine takes you from Ragtown Nevada all the way to the state of Montana for an exciting new adventure. Colorful characters added to the main campfire characters give this story a new twist in western adventure. This is one you don‘t want to miss!!

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short stories, westerns

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WordTickler wrote 1016 days ago

BDC,

In your "About Me" blurb, you said "It is easy to be verbose using a thousand words where just a few well picked words will do." Unfortunately, I felt that you completely ignored this piece of wisdom in your story "The Gold Mine in Helena, Montana". Something to consider.

You wrote "It's important that you visualize this wise old man dressed in a western outfit reminiscing about his past experiences".

Well, that stinks. You're telling us *how* to read your story. That's unreasonably arrogant in a sad kind of way. The story seems to have punch. I wish you would consider doing the work for us. Don't expect us to labor through your text. I can't imagine anyone paying to struggle reading a story. Don't tell us how to read it. Hold our hands and hearts and guide us--without letting us know that you're doing it.

Because of the enormous amount of grammatical, punctuation and formatting errors, I tried my best to ignore the resulting consequences and just enjoy the story. Sadly, the task was too overwhelming.

You may think that a good writer is the result of a good storyteller but I urge you to reconsider. Clear and concise communication is key to any good story and that won't be achieved without paying homage to the ground rules of grammar, punctuation and formatting. Rambling off a story verbally is NOTHING like rambling off a story with the written word. Unfortunately, I suspect you disagree with this.

I wanted to enjoy it but couldn't. It was too easy to give up early.

Please don't take offense at my comments. I really do have the desire to see people succeed--you included.

My Best,

Kerry B. Rogers, Author
The Occuscript
An Epic Fantasy Adventure

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