Plasti-cake

Hi Ian,

Wow! This is quite astonishing. Your prose is splendid. I wasn’t sure where it was going as the pitch didn’t give off much but I can say you have some colourful characters and the dialogue was spot on. Also great vivid descriptions. I got a good sense of the setting.

This was intriguing to say the least and I love your writing style. Very impressive.

Shelved!

Shinzy :)

Hello Ian,

Fascinating approach you have here. First, I liked the opening chapter with its mind-stirring. The next four chapters reveal a fascinating number of characters. Liked the line of Pauly being thirty four and his twin brother twenty four. Overall, characterization came out right, dialogue is wonderful and the prose flows smoothly.
This is a well-written and intuitively observed work. Rightly shelved.

All the best.

Janvier (Flash of the Sun)

Ian,
I'm not sure where this story is going, but it's fun getting there. Your writing is intensely observant, almost at every turn, at every moment someone walks in a room, at every breath. As others have pointed out, you have mastery of the language here. But there are also very interesting characters, like downtown Susan Brown. (OK, the "downtown" thing is mine. She is "Insane Girl" to you.) Wonderful, fun, and thought-provoking.
Backed.
Mark

Wow, you are a master of the English language. Your opening chapter is what really pulled me in. The concepts of nothing from something, nothing to nothing, etc. Very deep, philisophical stuff. Love it. Backed.

Came back to read more as promised- still don't know what's potting! But I like it! I don't see the niche this will fit into, publishing wise, but, hey, does that matter when you clearly had a good time writing this?

Keep going!

All the best
Elaina

I am here in regards to our agreed upon swap read. I am glad I read 4 chapters as I did not get into this until Ch 4. Very original, clever and funny, at least for me. I'm a Yank so the droll humor sometimes gets by me. As far as criticism is concerned, nothing stood out other than keep the chapters short: necessary in comedy and thrillers.

Your long pitch? hhhhmmm, kinda ambivalent about whether or not you need to rewrite this.

SHELVED! I do look forward to your forthcoming comments and possible backing on my book, if you have not done so already. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau File

This is something a little bit different, perhaps a bit experimental, but anyone who can use language the way you do deserves a place on my shelf, so I've backed Plasti-Cake.
Best wishes and good luck. Phil.. (Hallam's Ghosts)

Man, this is OUT THERE!!! And completely compelling.....I'm not certain what to think of this, But I couldn't stop reading and that says something.

Lockjaw

Ian,
Your “Plasti-cake” begins with the philosophical question, “So …why are you?” but, given that you are the author and not me, shouldn’t that be, “So…why am I?” Errr, I mean you.
Maeve and Rita appear in rapid order from within a bus driven by Pauly. They enter a parked car but the action begins as Rita runs from the car in tears to her own front door and Pauly challenges Maeve with, “I’ll get to da boddom of dis.” The chapter ends with the suggestion that this is a film with music and opening credits.
Intimate, tiny details of scabs, a cigarette, a shoe flapping occupy the page with greater priority than the characters. A boy calls Maeve “Adrian” as he drives away. Time is meaningless as Maeve’s age can transform at any moment. More characters’ names appear as randomly as leaves falling from a windswept tree. References to scenes and camera pans further the notion that this is a movie.
I think your title is a play on words. Plastic Ache.
Dude.
Mary

Ian, despite your previous comments, I completely see where you're coming from - or at least I think I do. It's a story of perhaps how people see themselves and their circumstances. And although the 'reality' changes over time, we still carry everything with us into the future. Maybe I got that wrong, but seeing from that point of view, I really enjoyed this. It's different and your narrative suits it perfectly. It feels like it was originally a film script that's been padded out to become a novel. All the same, I like it. I like your dialogue, but just be a little bit careful with accents. Writing them phonetically works well in the writer's head, but sometimes it doesn't work as well on the page. I sometimes have the same problem, knowing how much and how little. I'm giving this some time on my shelf because I think it's brave, well written, and different.
Cealarenne
THE GUARDIAN OF LESSER THINGS

Ian,

On one hand, I’m not quite sure what to make of this story (something you’re hearing a lot from, I see). I enjoyed the descriptions and the dialog, but I’m still not entirely sure *what* I’m reading about.

On the other hand, I did read quite a few chapters just to see where it was going. The short chapters are nice.

So…shelved. I’m not sure if I’d buy this or not, but I’m all for perpetuating a bit of oddness now and then.

Best of luck! ~Steve

Ian,

A strange work, indeed. As Jane Alexander mentioned, the switching of tenses was jarring. I didn't find this to be too confusing though. Rather, it was descriptive and innovative. "The sole was coming loose from one of the boy's pumps; it slapped and flopped when he walked, like the tongue of a delirious dog." Great sentence! On the shelf because it is so different and I think it deserves a push.

Gardner Browning

OK, I've read up to Chapter Eight and I still haven't a clue what's going on. I like the way you write - it's fresh and has a lightness of touch - but (yeah, there had to be a but) I just dunno if editors will take a chance on something nearly as mystifying as Finnegan's Wake! I love mysterious and I like books that don't fit into any specific genre but I do need a bit of a narrative thread. David Mitchell springs to mind - he plays all kinds of games but keeps you invested in his characters. I am intrigued by your characters and kept waiting for them to engage me fully but by Chap 8 they still hadn't and I was starting to feel like a bit of a mug.
On a practical note, you switch tenses all the time - but that may be part of the game. I'd like to shelve this but don't feel I can right now. Will come back and read a bit more and see if things pull together any more.

Very dreamy. OK I do have one question: so Maeve is also a male name? I've only ever seen 'Maeve Binchy' and I thought she was a woman/writer. Apart from that, it's intriguing.

Have NO IDEA what to make of this, ha ha! Don't be offended- I think I need to read it some more to see exactly where you're going. You tagged it as 'other' and I can see why. Cannot place this. The title? Well. On its own it has intrigue and is what drew me to this in the first instance!

Will be back with more.

Elaina