Book Jacket

 

rank 3736
word count 11805
date submitted 07.09.2009
date updated 29.03.2010
genres: Fiction, Science Fiction, Fantasy, ...
classification: moderate
incomplete

Calloway Blood

Michael Lynch

Fear is endemic.
If a man won’t bend, he will be broken.
This is Straybeck.

 

The Premier demands loyalty and, behind him, the Cathedral casts a long, black shadow.

Rob Calloway has fought before. He has paid a terrible price.

Ryan Calloway is weighed down by his father's shame. Twenty years later he is drawn into the same fight.

His younger brother, John, wants to protect Ryan until they fall for the same girl.

Alia Turner is the daughter of a factory owner. She was part of Straybeck’s elite until a worker riot left her father a cripple.

Calloway Blood is the story of one family struggling to survive. In a terrifying city, we see a boy growing up too fast and a father and brother who can’t keep him safe.

 
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tags

betrayal, family, fantasy, intrigue, love, martyr, murder, oppressive government, plot, politics, revolution, sci-fi, soldiers, terrorist, young adult...

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141 comments

 

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MontyBurners wrote 754 days ago

An absolute tour de force. I couldn't be happier to back this work. Very, very well written. I look forward to reading more from you Mr Lynch.

Sharatola wrote 787 days ago

Intense masculine writing. Orwell would probably back it -- I have

Suzannah Burke wrote 805 days ago

Michael...how the hell have i missed reading this for so long? I have just completed all you have uploaded...and I'm exhausted by the differing emotions raised all clamouring inside. I am angry...that a supposedly civilized peoples can betray those they are entrusted to protect...burning books...the gunnerman-- the lies Robert has told Ryan for 17 years in order to protect him from the same fate he suffered. The bleakness of desperate people in desperate situations...and the hunger for freedom from oppression.....this world has the stench of Nazi Germany and the fear that peoples endured.

A marvelous provactive and enduring book. This should be read widely and Published soon.
Backed with sincere pleasure.
Suzannah Burke

Paige Pendleton wrote 829 days ago

It is hard to tell which star shines the brightest here. The story is a page-turner. It's a commanding pace that forces the reader to commit - buut the characterizations.......wow. The two work together,and yet, the story supports the characterizations ~~~ the characterizations support the story. Really well done. Each piece alone, and together, masterfully created. The rest is everything it should be. The fantasy puts the reader where they are supposed to be (without any appearing effort). A credit to your genre, and a work your audience will love.

DMC wrote 951 days ago

Mike
This is very strong writing indeed. I think you know just what you are doing, because for me, this reads like a published novel. I’m both stunned and humbled. I’ll definitely be back to read more of the upload as soon as I get a chance.
Shelved with pleasure,
David
Green Ore

Orlando Furioso wrote 605 days ago

Ach, this sounds like me and mine, and I live in St.Albans.

CarolinaAl wrote 627 days ago

Your opening line hooked me. Your provocative story grabbed me and kept me riveted. Credible characters. Crisp dialogue. Confident narrative. Vital writing. Backed.

CraigD wrote 741 days ago

You've got a powerful narrative going here, with a well-established dysfunctional society and family, Clearly, after two chapters I'm not really going know what's going on yet, but the scene you've set is compelling. The one critique I'd offer is every now and then you bunch together a number of sentences beginning with pronouns, primarily "he." This causes a lot of sameness, and reworking most of those sentences would make the writing stronger. But the writing is solid overall, and the story and characters interesting, so this is easy to back.
Craig
The Job

SusieGulick wrote 750 days ago

Dear Michael, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed, "He Loves Me." Thanks so very much. :) Since I have already "commented & backed" your book, I came to your "comment" page to help it advance more. I will also put your book on my "watchlist" to hopefully help it move up (everytime someone "comments & backs" my book, it moves up). Could you please take a moment to "comment & back" my completed unedited memoir version? "Tell Me True Love Stories," which at the end tells my illness now & 6th abusive marriage. I'd be ever so grateful. :) Thank you. :) Love, Susie :)
p.s. Remember: Every "comment" & "backing" you do moves your book & the other person's book closer to the top. :)

MontyBurners wrote 754 days ago

An absolute tour de force. I couldn't be happier to back this work. Very, very well written. I look forward to reading more from you Mr Lynch.

MickR wrote 761 days ago

Very well done. There are usually small nits to be found in just about every book in here. Most are small, but this is the second book I have looked at tonight where I could find nothing but good writing and an interesting story.
MickR - The nightcrawler

SusieGulick wrote 762 days ago

Dear Michael, I love science fiction & fantasy because anthing can happen - & does. Your story is a good read because you create interest by having short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm backing/commenting on your book to help it advance. Could you please return the favor by taking a moment to back/comment on my TWO books, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" & the unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories." Thanks, Susie :)

Jeff Orton wrote 763 days ago

An intriguing pitch. I read the first several paragraphs and am definitely coming back to read the rest once I have time.

Jennipa wrote 765 days ago

Love it and intrigued by the story, wish I had time to read more. Maybe I'll get the chance when its published. Well done, jen

(Do You Believe In Angels?)

Patrick Xavier wrote 767 days ago

Fine work, Michael. Best of luck with it.

Jed Oliver wrote 769 days ago

This is extremely powerful writing. I think the comparison with Orwell is right on. Backed. Best Regards, Jedward (Knut)

Callaghan Grant wrote 771 days ago

Ah, the second chapter builds tension and invokes more mystery. It makes me want to read on.
Well done! Loving regards, Callaghan (The Shouting Tree)

Callaghan Grant wrote 771 days ago

Powerful, gripping opening.

Love, Callaghan

Richard Daybell wrote 771 days ago

Good opening scenes grab the reader's attention and hold it. The prose is straightforward and helps move the story along at a brisk pace. I'd give a little more attention to the pitch. The short pitch is good. The long pitch needs some variation in sentence structure, just to make it read a little better.

Mooderino wrote 773 days ago

Well written and a very engaging premise.

I found the very start a bit confusing, not clear who was speaking. The thing with hte magazine all played out well, but it did feel a bit obvious that he was going to get caught and it happened rather easily.

In the second chapter a lot of paragraphs start with the word Ryan and it felt a bit noticeable. The contrasting lives of these brothers worked nicely.

At the end of the third chapter, the last line I think 'try to kill' should be 'tried to kill'

I think the story is structured really well, interesting read with a novel backdrop. Backed.

regards
mood

David Fearnhead wrote 774 days ago

Your language is direct, yet your story complex and deceptive. I felt like I was lurking in the shadows trying to make sense of the events, which I presume will reveal themselves as the story unfolds. Your sentence structure lends itself well to the pace and action of your novel. It's certainly cinematic and the lack of dialogue keeps the story moving with breathless furiousity.
Backed
David
Bailey of the Saints

Pia wrote 774 days ago

Michael

Colloway Blood - Gripping prose with satisfying congruent voices and fine observations ... Her eyes flickered to the carpet because she could never look them in the face when she lied ...
When power is abused and a society out of control it's imperative for the free thinking to take sides, become the enemy. Can't guess why I haven't backed this before. Maybe I did.

Pia (Course of Mirrors)

A. L. Reynolds wrote 775 days ago

I found this captivating and excellently written. Uncomfortable to read in some ways, mostly because it's so well done!

gerry01 wrote 781 days ago

Hi Mike, This is good and entirely believable. '..thick red scars snaked up to his neck.' I loved the imagery here. Much of your writing is similar and you create a feeling of foreboding. All the best with this. Gerry

Michael John Grist wrote 783 days ago

An adrenaline rush, filled out with characters that we quickly and surprisingly deeply come to care about. From the off you`re world building, character building, developing conflict and tension, and moving the story forward without a break. Reminds me of some of Orson Scott Card`s best work dealing with children, for example Ender`s Game. You`re in John`s head completely, and show it to us, and his exploration of the world.

The spare descriptive style works wonders, keeping the pace fast and allowing us to imagine everything we need to from the few bits you give us. Letting us conjure up our own vision of this dystopia makes it more personal, even as you show it to us piece by piece.

Shelved, backed, the lot. Publication next!

Famlavan wrote 783 days ago

Calloway Blood

This is a very strong piece powerfully written. The characters are extremely well written and really drive this along – This is a very good piece of writing – Good luck

Sharatola wrote 787 days ago

Intense masculine writing. Orwell would probably back it -- I have

lionel25 wrote 792 days ago

Michael, your first chapter was powerful enough to sweep me into the second. Good job. My only insignificant nit is with the opening line of the second chapter. "Ryan ran" almost sounds repetitious. I'd use a substitute for ran, such as "sprinted" or something else.

Happy to back this.

Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

S Richard Betterton wrote 793 days ago

I like the chapters dedicated to single character's pov (I do it in my ch 1 and 2), and the three that I've read about, John, Ryan and Aria, are all very well portrayed against the backdrop of this ominous society. Great stuff.
Backed.
Cheers,
Simon

RichardBard wrote 796 days ago

This is a powerful story. Well written. Past paced. I love how we are plunged directly into the action, learning about the characters through their reaction to what’s going on around them. The first person present tense was a little difficult to get used to in the beginning, but it added urgency to the story, and before I realized it, I forgot all about it. The chilling story had me by the throat. Congratulations. Backed

Richard Bard
BRAINRUSH

Piers Peterson wrote 798 days ago

Michael,
What an exciting story! I have read all that you have uploaded, and am very pleased with the novel. You did a great job of bringing the circumstances of the repressed society to light bit by bit, with enough action to hold my attention. Well done!
Backed
Piers
Karmic Relief

A Knight wrote 798 days ago

Michael,

This is a chilling and gripping tale. You nurse the mystery of Ryan's behaviour and the violence outside throughout, and you have done an excellent job of grabbing my attention.

Backed with pleasure,
Abi xxx
"Everyone knows the rule: Stay inside the Wall, but Tisha believes rules were made to be broken." - Relic

Burgio wrote 800 days ago

This is a very well written - and interesting - story. You have a real knack for creating likable characters. The way you set scenes - just enough description so your reader knows where he or she is - not so much it ever bogs down the story is just as well done. Backed. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Beval wrote 800 days ago

A totallitarian society maintaining its authority by violence and fear, an under ground movement working for its overthrow and a family caught up in the conflict.
The father has fought before, fought and paid a terrible price, now his sons are beginning the same fight and he is desparate to prevent them suffering as he suffered.
This is a highly charged and highly readable book with a strongly drawn back story.
Backed with pleasure.

zan wrote 802 days ago

Calloway Blood
Michael Lynch

Michael,
I read your pitches and chapter 1. I thought this was an interesting plot and thought your title "Calloway Blood" quite appropriate. Familial relations, here that significant one between a father and his two sons, are always interesting to me because it is so relevant to life, and often so revealing. And here your plot is intensified because the two brothers have a romantic interest in the same woman. A recipe for much drama I think. Chapter one was a good start and kept my interest throughout. I particularly liked that stunning segmengt when Ryan's dad unbuttoned his shirt and grabbed Ryan's face forcing him to watch that mass of melted flesh - the left side of his chest hanging lower than the right, the thick red scars snaking up to his neck. This chapter was intense, and represents a good sample of your writing which I enjoyed very much.
Best wishes in finding a publisher Michael.
Zan

kittykat wrote 802 days ago

Fascinating read, sinister and claustrophobic. I dipped into several chapters - I like the Alia chapter particularly - she's so trapped by lack of money and people trying to exploit that, then gets caught up in something she knows she shouldn't. Really good. It would be helpful to know John's age (sincere apologies if I missed it) as he comes across as quite a bit younger in relation to Ryan, yet your pitch suggests they'll be genuine rivals in love, so I'm guessing they're nearer in age? That's a tiny thing. I have no criticisms. Gladly backed! Kittykat (My House Eats People)

lisawb wrote 804 days ago

This is powerful, I would have picked this up in a shop and bought it. The emotional pull when the boy's Dad showed his chest, the intriguing moment when Michael entered Ryan's room as he was pulling down the loft door. This is only the start and I was hooked. The premise is brilliant and the book gets better as you read on.

Backed with pleasure.

Lisa

A Fine Line

Suzannah Burke wrote 805 days ago

Michael...how the hell have i missed reading this for so long? I have just completed all you have uploaded...and I'm exhausted by the differing emotions raised all clamouring inside. I am angry...that a supposedly civilized peoples can betray those they are entrusted to protect...burning books...the gunnerman-- the lies Robert has told Ryan for 17 years in order to protect him from the same fate he suffered. The bleakness of desperate people in desperate situations...and the hunger for freedom from oppression.....this world has the stench of Nazi Germany and the fear that peoples endured.

A marvelous provactive and enduring book. This should be read widely and Published soon.
Backed with sincere pleasure.
Suzannah Burke

Tope Apoola wrote 805 days ago

Down-to-earth and genuinely entertaining. You really transported me to the story.
Backed!

Tope Apoola
Times of the supermen

Cait wrote 806 days ago

Calloway Blood:

Michael, your very good story, the two brothers and their father, kept me interested through the first two chapters and when time permits I will come back and read more of this.

Writing is good and I was through the chapters before I knew it.

All the best, and have put it on my shelf.

Cáit ~ Muckers ~

Phyllis Burton wrote 808 days ago

Hello Mike, You paint powerful pictures in your excellently written story. This is page turning writing in your chosen genre and I have no hesitation in SHELVING this. Well done.

Phyllis
A Passing Storm

Francesco wrote 815 days ago

Cracking Sci-Fi/Fantasy that is powerfully written!
Backed!
A look at Sicilian Shadows would be greatly appreciated.
Frank.

scottmaiorca wrote 819 days ago

Great opening. Very descriptive when needed.

courtmuse wrote 819 days ago

Fantastic opener - lots of tension and emotion in the first chapter. You use very little prose to establish the relationship between the boys, and the differing relationships they have with their dad, but it's very effective.

Great job - backed!

Courtney

Jim E.M. Miles wrote 820 days ago

I read two chapters. I anticipate that Ryan will confront the ominous Cathedral and something explosive will occur.

You have one small misstep with "he clicked back the chamber and it snapped into place." It does not remind me of any handgun I have ever handled.

If the pistol is an automatic:

"He drew back the slide and let it snap forward, taking a round into the chamber."

If it is a revolver:

"He cocked the hammer."

Followed by:

"He disengaged the safety catch."

carlashmore wrote 820 days ago

Mike, this is terrific stuff. I love your opening chapters. You get straight into the action without any fuss and your pace of movement is terrific. You are a fantastic storyteller for the adult market and I hope this does really well. There is such a palpable air of tension throughout that resonates with any reader. Good luck and well done. Carl. the Time Hunters

Paige Pendleton wrote 829 days ago

It is hard to tell which star shines the brightest here. The story is a page-turner. It's a commanding pace that forces the reader to commit - buut the characterizations.......wow. The two work together,and yet, the story supports the characterizations ~~~ the characterizations support the story. Really well done. Each piece alone, and together, masterfully created. The rest is everything it should be. The fantasy puts the reader where they are supposed to be (without any appearing effort). A credit to your genre, and a work your audience will love.

AlanMarling wrote 831 days ago

Dear Mike Lynch,

Thank you for sharing your story with us. After a firm nod at your first paragraph, I skipped to chapter seven to cover less-traveled ground and was rewarded by a wallop of intensity. I’m thinking of “remembered screaming as his bones clicked apart”. I feel like I’m in a nightmare, since I don’t have a firm grasp what lead up to this scene, and you describe bodies around the cathedral's shadows. The boatman is chained to his boat. Rob’s legs are swelling within his boots, and he’s in agony. Birds have their way with the eyes of corpses. Your writing is both mood-evoking and visceral.

Bravo! Backed.

Best wishes,
Alan Marling

Carrots wrote 832 days ago

This is extraordinarily powerful. The author knows precisely what he's doing to build up the drama and tension. The terse dialogue, the sense of being spied on, the violence in the background, the mystery of the brother's activities, the warmth of a mother and finally the reality of the father's scars. Masterly. Backed.

Elsie W wrote 836 days ago

I read far more than I intended - five chapters before my eyes started crossing at the screen. This is sooo good. Kind of like 1984 meets Hitler. There is a real feel of us and them. There's the downtrodden workers - all feels so real. Down to the dirty streets, the gangs of workers, lewd suggestions of payment and her mother beaten by life. I wonder if you didn't give too much away too soon, by giving us the newspaper article with Rob, his scars, etc. But then maybe there is a whole lot more to be discovered?
I think this is great. One of the best things I have read on here for a while, this stands out, and I will be back for more.

Tracy McCarthy wrote 836 days ago

Chilling opening, and very emotive. It definitely makes a reader want to turn the page.
(Already) Backed with pleasure.
Tracy
The Guardians

Jupiter Echoes wrote 857 days ago

SHELVED with pleasure, my friend. BACKED with pleasure!

SRFire wrote 882 days ago

Calloway Blood
This is really gripping story. You have a wonderful but natural descriptive writing. It enables the reader to see clearly what is happening and right from the start identify with each of the characters. It is like you are a fly on a wall in a house full of unspoken tension. It sucks you into the story making you want to read on and on. I loved it. Deservedly backed. Best, Sana

gillyflower wrote 883 days ago

I started at Chapter Four, as you requested. This is a gripping, fast moving story, which isn't just about the action. Rob's discovery of John reading a newspaper clipping about his father's past works well as a trigger to throw us back into Rob's memories of the attempted assassination of the Premier, but it's a lot more than that. The important thing here, for Rob, is not his memories, but his need to be honest with his son. 'I think about lying...but I've done that with Ryan for seventeen years, and I can't have both my boys looking at me the way he does.' This is an economical use of words, which tells us so much in such a short space about Rob and about his relationship with both Ryan and John. Excellent. Your fast moving style brings us into the action of the rest of the chapter easily and effectively. I.m impressed by this well written book, which has both thriller elements and deep characterisation. Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

bookjunky wrote 885 days ago

Michael,

"Calloway Blood" is the second book I've found on Authonomy employing the first person present tense POV. I tend not to like it (as a reader), though I don't know why. That said, it lends your tale an immediacy that makes the near future/parallel world feel up close and personal. Well done and Backed.
If you get a chance, would you mind taking a look at my novel, "The Wild, Wild Quest"? I appreciate any comments and feedback I can get.

Best of luck,
J. A. Johnson
(The Wild, Wild Quest)
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=13246

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