Dream Diamond

It is not often that I am struggling for words but this astonishing work has truly taken my breath away. It is not a genre I normally read but the way it is written is absolutely incredible. I wanted to simply delve in at different points but to really appreciate the characters and fascinating story it has to be read in order. The rape scene –a scene that many writers tend to ‘over egg’ is a real show stopper.
Sorry for all the clichés but I really cannot do this book justice with my own humble phrases.
Your use of language is an example to every writer and I feel you belong with the master wordsmiths that have been quoted for centuries.

I've had some really cool crits. Here are a few of my favourites.


… you've done with words what Bosch did with paint

… not unlike when I read Steven King, I find myself wondering about your sanity

… You create fine evil: those bull guards and ogre warriors are sickening - in fact they are better than Robert E. Howard's.

... Dream Diamond contains a wealth of vivid and exaggerated mental imagest that the author cloaks in autthenticity which allows the reader to 'believe'.

I am unsure how worthy dream diamond is of some of the comments dream diamond is getting, but i would like to thank everyone in advance.

I concentrated on Chs. 16 and 17. The author's wide reading background is very evident..to detect an appreciation of Quantum Physics..the act of observation deciding reality...is rare indeed on Authonomy. I struggled to identify literary influences...Poe, maybe..but this essentially an impressive new literary voice in action. Backed.

Both compelling and breathtaking. A vivd description of characters, setting and plot. You have a flair with words and use them to great advantage. While your MC's are stark reminders of reality - they react as normal persons given their circumtances - they also hold qualities of the ethereal. Meaning they can be construed as two dimensional; godlike in fact. This is a great read and most enjoyable for fellow fantasy writers. Well backed.

Andrew
Darkwinglord

Jupiter,

Just read all of Part 2 of Dream Diamond--my mind is still reeling. I was confused and bewildered, and a little terrified all at the same time. Upon reading my novel, you had said you have compition. You have nothing to fear--no compition exists.

My God, this has to be the strangest, most conveluded, most original thing I have ever read in my entire life. LOL. Every page I read made clear the strength of your writing voice, which carries a sense of command nearly unparalled. Dream Diamond is disturbing in the utmost, and strange enough to make one think of a mind on drugs, all the while letting the reader know this is the way it is meant to be. Larko is extremely well-crafted, the monster in the night no one wants to meet. He is sick to the very core, and absolutely frighteninig in the duelty of his twisted percetion of love. The brute whose mind is so warped that the line between rape and giving of himself in passion is thoroughly blurred.

There is a darkness and brutal honesty to the writing, a grittiness that reminds me of Max Max: The Road Warrior, but a thousand times more real. The gore that permiates every page beyond chapter 23 is mind-boggling, and in the best of ways, not unlike when i read Steven King, I find myself wondering about your sanitiy. The writing is mezmarizing, even while it frightens, but to write such a twisted tale, the author's mind must surely harbor a touch of madness.

A fantastic storyteller you are, and though this is definately not for the faint of heart, Dream Diamond makes for one hell of a wild read. You imagination is a wonder to behold. Backed.

-Raven
The Shadowsword Saga

Your pitch is like poetry. It enticed me, and I had to know more. I may have even backed you at another time - but hey, you deserve another shot, and you have such a kind face.
You use words very effectively to paint a picture. A natural craftsman at work here, I am convinced. Well done. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

An incredible and vividly described fantasy saga that captures the very art of painting images with words.

Backed with pleasure, best of luck

Jack Hughes
Dawn of Shadows

Nice imaginative story. I like the premise and the set up. You have talent. Wish you well. Backed.

Take a look at my fantasy, 'Earth Reaver'. I welcome all comments.

Nice imaginative story. I like the premise and the set up. You have talent. Wish you well. Backed.

Dream Diamond - The pitch didn't do anything for me and I nearly didn't start to read. I'm so glad I did. I have only read two chapters so far and haven't got to grips with the story, but your writing is fantastic. This is the best writing I have found on this site for days. The descriptions and atmosphere are breath-taking. Definitely worth backing and I will come back for more when I have time. Good luck, hope it keeps climbing.
Kristen Stone
Kianda Mala - The Monkey Man
Shattered Dreams

I see you're moving toward the impossible desk. Hope you make it with a bullet and still backed... for how many months now? A lot of them and well worth it :)

diamond in the rough

Didn't know what to expect here but I was blown away. The characters are alive on the page with these strange monster characters. You have a vivid imagination and you have obviously thought this through. The rape scene is startling and this story is multilayered. Backed with pleasure.

Backed with pleasure. E.Loraine Royal Blood Chronicles

From the very beginning this is something completely different. Wonderful imagination, and written with flair. Happy to back this for you.
Please consider taking a look at my book, The Job.
Craig

Stay in there Jupiter... I get the feeling the Dream Diamond's time is coming soon to a publisher's desk near you :)

Dear Jupiter -- It's hard to add something meaningful having read your other comments, so let me just say thank you for a most entertaining read. Not my usual genre, but your skill compelled me onward. J and B, The Long Black Veil

Instantly pulls us into this world, like a chase scene through dark woods to open a movie. We have no choice but to join this march, to watch and see what will happen next. Extremely well-written, with a spare but moving style, good characterization and exposition of this quasi-society. Has almost an apocalyptic air about it and riveting action. Very well done--a brilliant entry in the fantasy genre.
---Mary
The Qualities of Wood

Jupiter, you're still up on my backed list! Go baby, Go!!! Hang in there :)

Dream Diamond
Probably the most surprising and naughty opening scene i've ever read...
A stunning piece of fantasy fiction. Darkly decadent and sensual, the author is talented beyond belief.
A real page turner.
Alison Butler (The Hanging of Margaret Dickson)

Dear Jupiter, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed both of my books. Thanks so very much. :) Since I have already "backed" & "commented" on your book, I came to your "comment" page to help it advance more. I will also put it on my "watchlist" to hopefully help it move up (everytime someone comments/backs my book, it moves up). God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)
p.s. Your book cover is the most beautiful diamond I've ever seen - even Elizabeth Taylor would love it. :)

Dear Jupiter, I love diamonds - a girl's best friend - having been married 6 xs, I've had them as you'll see in my 2 books listed below. I love your rhymes. :) They really accent your story. Your blurb is good because it prepared me to read your book. Your story is good because you create interest by having short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm backing/commenting on your book to help it advance. Could you please return the favor by taking a moment to back/comment on my TWO books, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" & the unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories." Thanks, Susie :)

The brutal start to this is as shocking as it is compelling, and leads us right into the rest of theintriguing story. This is fantasy at its best, so good it's almost reality.

Fantastic and backed.
Abi xxx
"Everyone knows the rule: Stay inside the Wall, but Tisha believes rules are made to be broken." - Relic

On my shelf!

Hi

This is a well crafted story. It echoes the comic strip stories that one used to be able to purchase at a newsagent. Young men and teens would lap this up. I feel like I'm seeing this for real as your descriptions are so well written.
The best of luck with this.
Shelved.
A return read and comment would be appreciated.
Cheers olga

Not my usual genre but boy is this book ever well written. I really loved the prose that you intersperced in the first chapter. Well done. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

I wish you the very best of luck. kind regards pinkcoffee 'In The Moment' & 'Chameleon'

Mind boggling! You paint pictures that stay with the reader. Well crafted. Backed.

If you have a chance, give mine a read. I would appreciate it.
Best,
Robert James Glider
Golden Conspiracy

This is not really my kind of book but you have an interesting and engaging writing style. Good dialogue and pace to this. Backed. Colin

This is a strange story. I'm not sure how you would classify it genre wise, but that's possibly a good thing. Difficult, but ultimately good. How ever fantastic the plot seems, it is nevertheless beautifully written, your vision is apparent, your skills and mastery of language and the art form. I cannot fault this. So I won't try. On my shelf.

You've created an interesting world here. People who like dragons should like this a lot. I like the way you thread poetry through the beginning chapters. It creates a very unique writing style. Brings the story out of the ordinary. Backed. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

When are you posting more?!?!

I don't know how this isn't published yet! It's both gruesome and beautiful all at once! It's both poetry and prose done in a precise, intelligent way! BACKED

Liz
The Cheech Room

Thanks so much for the read. I have never been a fan of present tense storytelling, but probably for no reason other than I can't justify any story told in present tense. Since I'm not there, I know it can't be happening "right now". I understand the rationalization that it might be told present tense, as in a diary, but then the main character isn't spending his time writing...okay, okay. The story has a clear voice, good flow, and seems to start on a run. All good points. Normally, I wouldn't shelve this because I wouldn't read on...but my tense issue is likely more the problem than your story telling. Because I know what a thick head I have at times...shelved :-) Best always, Tim Greaton

Not sure why this has a red arrow. It is well written, a good read. Deserves to move higher
'Arry

Hello Jupiter, with a pen name like that - or is it your real name? - I would expect something rather special and I'm not surprised or disappointed in reading your work that displays such a weird and wonderful world. Where the hell did you dig this up from? It's strange and fascinating, scary even. Your imagination is so vivid in creating such an array of characters and the literary feel you make it seem so effortless. This is a very unusual piece of writing and is going on my shelf. I can't pretend that I understand it, but what's to understand? Just wade in and swim in it! Chris1

Not a genre I enjoy reading, so my comments must relate to what i know, petty stuff really.
I find the language somewhat florid -- in ch3, why say a husky 'bit upon' the tether? Surely 'bit' or 'chewed' or even 'tore at' would do? Similar elaborate usage is annoying, rather than enjoyable, to me at least.
Nombuso is a girl's name in the Zulu and Swazi languages.

Well, sir. Much of this type of work suffers from substandard writing. Dream Diamond, I'm glad to say, doesn't have that problem. You write well.
The other thing I look for in fantasy is originality, something that is really quite hard to achieve - after all, JK Rowling never managed it. I've read five chapters of this, and it seems to me, so far, like a well written but regular fantasy novel. Your old pitch, if I remember rightly, talked about it needing to be read in its entirety before being damned (or something to that effect.) Well, that's fair enough. I haven't read it all, and I certainly won't damn it. But if there is something unique about it (your words, again), then, if you're looking to get published, I'd seek to introduce it into the plot sooner. If you're not bothered about getting into print, and are writing for your own pleasure, then it's not an issue.
Backed, wholeheartedly, for the strength of your writing. As to the uniqueness - well, it's not for me to say, yet, is it?
Mark Engineer (A Room Full of Ghosts)

This is not my typical read, but i was very impressed. You held my interest as you painted your world. Backed

Your book compares with popular fiction like modern art compares to a traditional landscape. Being a person of very ordinary tastes, I'm afraid I didn't like it. Obviously that does not mean much, and very likely it's the type of book to win literary prizes.

I enjoyed the opening three chapters, and found myself getting drawn into the fantasy, and adventures of Qelb and Nombuso. Very well written, and I'm happy to back this.
Mark (Stand up and live!)

I read the first two chapters and then skipped to chapter 7. It's something I often do to get a real feel for the story.
Your writing never disappoints, the imagery and the pace are consistently compelling.
Fantasy at its best.

Wonderful - and backed , of course.

Berni
Fledgling and Renegades

Hi, been on my watchlist for some time.

Well.

There's no denying that your writing and use of words, adjectives and other grammatical techniques are superb. You have a brilliant grasp of your story, surroundings and characters. My only qualm [and this might just be me] is that when I read it, it reads a bit like Discworld Online, rather than a fluid narrative. Again, this might just be me. But things like "the woman stumbles," or "a loud crack" or "a snort shatters" - I'm not sure if its going between present and past tense? This is not a criticism, merely an observation, and I hope you don't take it badly. As I've said, you have a brilliant writing style, a wonderful grasp of words, and I'm a little gobsmacked I can follow it!

You have the ability to keep your reader hooked, but just make sure all your paragraphs and sentences flow together.

Or, you can ignore everything I've said and keep up the good work.
Lol.

Shelved.
Tifa
[Eliphe Tiny-Wen]

Beautifully written...a work of art. BACKED.

BD Nelson
Abigail's Cries
The Autobography

Great writing and I am happy to back it.

Jupiter, I read the material available. I agree with the "cross genre" remark. A dream, that is not reality but reflects many of the facets (as in diamonds) of life is just remarkable in terms of plot. The poetry adds to the storyline (amazing to read). Your work is a real thought-provoker because introducing characters (unique to say the least) living their version of normal lives, then into War followed by Compasion and onto Iga's dreams.
I put Dream Diamond on my Bookshelf. Chuck

From the pitch I didn't think I'd like this but the writing drew me in. It was at times dark and disturbing but still mesmerising. Without doubt an original and will back it. Paddy

I like the Stephen King comment, I do agree, something very different... But nevertheless very good! Well done!

Read the prologue--clever opening.
onto chapter 1:
This has a good pace, but I couldn't connect to the story. It opens with a woman being raped and the whole time I'm reading I'm worried about that happened to that woman and unable to connect with this magic diamond that has been found. I mean the rape is important right? because it's in the opening paragraph, but then it's immediately a thing of the past.
I'm not sure how many sections of the italic's are needed, but that is your call. I felt it was a bit much. I found the part where the boy hit the guy with the sledgehammer was very shocking and interesting. Still, I'm not really sure what the story is. Where is this going? I don't feel a sense of forward movement, but that could just be me, so please take this with a grain of salt. Obviously you are doing very well here and IMO you should trust the opinions of the majority. If anything I say rings true to you though, all the best with edits and feel free to contact me to give a second read if you make changes.
xBeccaX
The First Phoenix

This sounds quite a bit like some ideas I have in my own book, The Invaders, but (some) people know about the manipulation, though vast majorities don't. Anyway, I'm going to put your book on my watchlist, till I've waded through a few more on my "backed" list, then I'll back yours. I hope you understand. It sounds really good, and I *will* read it!
Anne G

Simply amazing. Reading your work has been a pleasure!

H Leigh Cornwell
(Blood Descent)

Chapters 1, 2 and 3.

I like the mythic imagery that you create in the dream sequences and think that your characters' names add value. Bringing the jeopardy into Nombuso's post-dream confrontation with the Huskies keeps the opening enjoyably edgy.

A minor point: In the fight sequence with the hydra, I noticed a number of places where pronouns proliferated - e.g. "Bringing his shield round before him, he waits." It might be worth thinning them out a little.

The opening chapters allude to the dawning of an epic and perilous saga.

If Tolkien hadn't written the Hobbit for his children... I think it might look something like this. Dark and very adventurous.

Backed!

Dan-
Eunice and Ethan

HI Jupiter, Your 1st chapter leaves words to ponder...I enjoy and envy the way you use words..great mastery and wxciting to read..Gladly back th e book..Harold Alvin Icon. p.s. I will be gone for the next 1-2 months as I will be in the far east work on another novel...

An astounding Sci/Fi. Fantasy story, written in a very enviable way; how I wish I could write in this manner. It all flows together easily, making it so easy to read and understand. Whereas in some of this type of story, it becomes a little difficult to follow the events. You have a privileged talent which should be given it's full potential. I love this story.
Backed to the book shop!
Fromante. (Norman) The Witch of Hambone Bk.3. Also, Muddledydo.