T-Cup and The Dream Team Fairies

OMW, my daughter has a wiggle, in her nose and you have now convinced her, and me, that she has some fairy genes. I wish we could buy this in paperback, it would make the perfect sunday afternoon read! Left in the hands of your latest fan, my young Jenna, on another pc, we give you our backing!
Angi

Dear Sarah
I would buy the book just to get the book cover ha!. loved it. the short and long pitch are just captivating and I am sure this book must be already picked up by a publisher. It is so well written and the storyline so original. your characters are soooo real and soooo animated, i want them to stay i want to adopt them all and have them play in my world. CONGRATS on this read....
.I will carry on reading and comment further on as I would like to get this book of yours backed to assist it on the climb to the top.
Backed for sure my me. ..I would really appreciate it if your would look at my book, COMMENT , and back it. If not that is OK also
The VERY best of luck with your book

Denise
The Letter

Well, this is just the most fantastic story (how come all I got as stories when I was a kid was a bear called Rupert of all things and bloody set of archaic nursery rhymes?)

I almost never comment on covers (never judge a book by- and all that) but for the second time I am going to mention yours. It's superb, I can imagine settling the little brats down in bed (after a long day of prising their sticky hands off ornaments they were too short to reach the day before) and showing them that cover before the read. It would be one of those books they return to in later years to relive those comforting times.

You have great premise and story line there, and backed up with those names; T-Cup, Dum, Gobey and the rest, exactly the recipe for a tale the children would regurgitate with ease.

The whole idea of earning your wings is a wonderful cautionary tale about working hard and the Department of truth was a great idea. You have a wonderful imagination and the perfect tone in which to tell this story.

My kids had a Boglin each when they were younger. It was a grotesque rubber thing in a cardboard "cage" that worked as a puppet; they loved it but I honestly think I had the most fun with it; they would eventually glaze over a fall asleep.

Any way, you have an excellent voice for this book and I know it would have been a boon for me to have it years ago. I was talking to my partner about it, her mum is a head teacher for a nursery, and she thought it was a brilliant idea.

BACKED

Lovely conversational tone full of fireside charm. Your 'retired dream fairies' made me smile but would enthrall your target reader of whom many would have mouth slightly fallen agape quite early into Chapter 1.
Actually, there is something almost serious and matter-of-fact about the way you relate the different types of fairy and I almost felt like a child again wanting to ask my teacher, 'Miss, have you had fairies at the bottom of your garden?' A simple, 'Why yes, of course,' would have had me accepting all further exposition on fairies because you seem to carry that inimitable air of authority that does not need questioning. I suppose this is the other side of the coin which has on it 'the willing suspension of disbelief'.
Your fairies from 'The Department of Truth' are daringly different from the conventional image of a fairy wearing something like a flouncy tu-tu and inanely holding up a wand like the Olympic torch.
I like this. You have a very distinct voice and such a refeshing departure from all the veiled and monotonous violence and mayhem found in Harry Potter. Backed.
Ray
(A Child from the Wishing Well)

A very gripping and exciting tale for the young ones, Sarah. I love the entire story, I am definitely a child at heart, I even got excited reading the story? This could become a best seller on the childrens shelf, I know the neighbours young boy would really love it. The theme is ideal for a bedtime story, i reaaly hope it makes it to the top. Backed.
Fromante. (Norman) The Witch of Hambone Bk.3. Also, Muddledydo.

Im sure I read and backed this a while ago but backing it again because it appears you have polished it to near perfection. Starred as well.

Liz
The Cheech Room

T-Cup and The Dream Team Fairies.
By Sarah Manfield.

Lovely story this…fairies…how they earn their wings…administering nice dreams.
Then we have the Boglins…with their nightmares…let battle begin.
You have some very colorful writing here, excellent description that will draw a child into the story.
It took me back quite a bit; I would have swapped by best comics when I was eight or nine for a book like this. Believe me, I was captivated at that time by such as this book…I still am…ha ha.
I’ve not read it all, but what I have convinces me that this book will make the book shelves of many a good children’s book shop.
Very pleased to give it a high star-rating and to wish you the best with it.
A must, for any child. Well done, Sarah!!

Kind regards,

Neville. THE SECRETS OF THE FOREST – THE TIME ZONE.

Sarah, I know my 8 year old granddaughter would enjoy reading this, she loves fairies. This will be on her list of things to read the next time she visits. I love your concept, and it's very colorful, as I did with mine. I'm Pleased to Back it.
God Bless,
Dana P.
FINDING XANADU and THE JOURNEY HOME

I remember when this story was on youwriteon. I thought it was rather sweet back then, and liked the concept. I read some to my son, but think it's probably more suited to younger primary school kids as he's a bit older (8). I know it says 5 to 10 year olds, but at the top end of primary school boys start getting more into superhero stuff. Also, I think this would go down very well with preschoolers, with it being read to them at bedtime.

I also think your story suits girls the best, since they love fairies (like my daughter did when she was little). She would have lapped this up at 5 or 6 (I still have her old fairy books). However, younger boys may still enjoy it, especially since you do a really good job with the Boglins. Your descriptions of them were rather amusing.

Just one last word. I thought T-cup was rather nice, and I liked the messages you're getting across to the kids. Well done. All the best - Marita.

T-cup - ahh, what a great name for a fairy! It conjures up some vivid pictures. The name, Gobey, is fantastic too - makes me think of bogeys, (and kids love all that kind of stuff!)
What I loved most about what I read were your descriptions, particularly about the Boglins. They're painted very well.
I have some constructive feedback too (always helpful, I find):
I'm guessing this is for the 7-9 age group, and whilst it's all pretty much spot on for that audience, there were a few words that I don't think they'll understand e.g. 'pulchritudinous' and 'peridot'.
The first chapter, I feel, would benefit from some 'showing' rather than all 'telling'. It's merely a stylistic and personal view, so ignore me if you don't agree, but I think it would be wonderful to show the dream fairies and Boglins at work instead of telling the reader what they do.
I found it a little confusing in chapter two when T-cup goes to the Department of Truth for her training. I wasn't sure what she was actually training for. Perhaps try and make this a bit clearer?
When T-cup is thinking about getting her wings, there are speech marks. Either she's thinking it or saying it. If she's thinking it, the speech marks aren't needed.
I like the way this is going, though. The battle between dreams and nightmares is a wonderful concept, and one I expect children will find very appealing. I wish you the best of luck with it :)

Sara,

I started reading your Opus and thought I would give you my cent and half:

Obviously I am not a children's book expert but I do know something about writing:

Here are my favorites:

"Cloud was tall...."
That entire paragraph is lovely, full of original imagery

"They never wash....".
Again the imagery (i.e. smelly cheeses) is marvelous

"Claire was normal looking....."
the description is mean.....lol

"Oliver's mum was not very happy...."
very endearing.....(i.e. round of tea) very British

"Oliver had been relived...."
This is very astute for any child psychologist would tell you: that is exactly what children do when they have nightmares; they keep drawing them

"they had been watching from her moon-scope...."
Moon-scope....that is precious!

Adorable writing

david

Love the cover. Love the story. I'm sure girls 5 - 8 would adore it. Just to say, the story is a little on the large size for this readership (but there are always exceptions). Good luck with it.
Do you think i'll get my wings if i complete 25 review missions?
Kim
St Viper's School for Super Villains

How colorful!! It is filling my head with the rainbows of colors that the images invoke. My 8 year old daughter would enjoy reading this. My only suggestion would be to watch the various words that you are using. Make sure that they are targeted for your audience. While I am not a professional, I find that my daughter will read big words as long as once she figures out how to say the word, that she can still understand it's meaning. Other than that, I think it is great and will totally back it!!

The book is so colorful!! I love all of the images that it puts into my head. My 8 year old daughter would love reading this. My only suggestion would be to consider the words that you are using. Make sure that they would be understood by your target audience. Other than that.... Good luck!! I have you backed!!

The book is so colorful!! I love all of the images that it puts into my head. My 8 year old daughter would love reading this. My only suggestion would be to consider the words that you are using. Make sure that they would be understood by your target audience. Other than that.... Good luck!! I have you backed!!

The book is so colorful!! I love all of the images that it puts into my head. My 8 year old daughter would love reading this. My only suggestion would be to consider the words that you are using. Make sure that they would be understood by your target audience. Other than that.... Good luck!! I have you backed!!

The book is so colorful!! I love all of the images that it puts into my head. My 8 year old daughter would love reading this. My only suggestion would be to consider the words that you are using. Make sure that they would be understood by your target audience. Other than that.... Good luck!! I have you backed!!

T-Cup and the Dream Team Fairies - The idea of retired Dream Fairies living at the bottom of gardens made me smile.
This is a really sweet story for children aged between 5-8? Descriptions of fairies are easy for children to imagine, especially as the cover is so beautifully graphic. The characters,T-Cup and her friend, Cloud, are very positive as is their relationship. This contrasts nicely with the horrid Boglins in chapter three, who will be easy for children to imagine. Gobey's bad behaviour sends a good message that youngsters will connect with and not want to emulate, equating it with the bullying girl in chapter four. I thought this was another good message to both the bullied and bullies.
The voice and tone of the writing is gentle though I thought some of the words used seemed rather out of step with the rest of the text. For example - pulchritudinous - some parents might not know this means, beauty. There were a few other instances of this but overall this is a lovely story for parents to read to their young ones.

Nanty - Chrys!

This is a beautiful book and deals with some issues that I'm sure many children will encounter in their lives - bullying, nightmares etc - but not know how to talk about. Even though those issues are dealt with here in quite a light hearted manner, I think may children would find this happy ending very reassuring as it demonstrates that such issues can be overcome.

I love the description of the Boglins - very engaging.

Definitely one for my bookshelf. Would appreciate your views on my book if you have chance as a fellow children's writer.

All the best

Clare Morris
The Cloud Drivers: The Giant's Storm

Started reading to my daughter...very hard to stop!! A great read. She loves fairies. Will take us a few nights to read but so far we are loving it!

Fairies seem to be the number one favourite of little girls of a certain age 4-8 if I'm not mistaken. Must specify your target readers age! [tags] publishers do require this!

Hi Sarey, this is an imaginative story and I love the names, title and the cover pic. Which age group did you have in mind, 7-ISH?As I think this would sit very well with them and you would have a wide audience. Dreams are very important to kids and as they don't fully understand them at this age (I don't really understand mine either though and I'm 28) I think you are covering an interesting topic!
The one suggestion I do have is that you open in quite an authoritive way-perhaps more dialogue? I understand why you have opened this way and of course it is just a suggestion but if you put in some dialogue it would really break that text down.I had a similar issue with mine until someone (who is published) pointed it out to me.
Best of luck-I have given you 5 stars, Claire

Absolutely delightful!

Jumped into ch 6. Here are my notes:

First sentence made me think this was children’s lit. A couple paragraphs in confirmed that.

It occurs to me that dreaming is a good subject for kids. Mine are always talking about them.

I saw illustrations in my mind. Have you gotten that far?

The details of the mission were interesting. How the fairy, dreams and children interact.

I think it’s incredibly important to help children make sense of and take control of their dreams. Such an important topic.

I have a handful of things to say in your messages about punctuation and content.

Hi Sarey:

Good prose and clarity of expression. Story has good movement. If it was on the market, it would probably have wide distribution. Backed.

Please view SHINING AFTER RAIN or one of my other books.

Lorne

Great Story!
Joe-Herbivore City

Hi Sarah,
I finally managed to get you back on my shelf. It's a pleasure to be able to offer you my support again for your lovely book. You already know how much I enjoyed it . . . so this second backing as a gesture of my continuing support.
Hope all is well . . . good luck!
Cly (Hybrid)

Sarah - drawn by your fabulous cover and now your imaginative writing I have backed T-cup and the dream team Fairies with delight. Do please take a look at Freckles the Fawn some time. Balepy (Valerie)

I have been reading parts of your story to my 7 year old niece who is absolutely enthralled.
To me that sums up the talent of the writer.
Backed
Ray.

A highly delightful and well written childrens story with wonderful touches of imagery. Your writing is fun and engaging and I wish you every success.

Jane

I wish I had thought of this!

A nigh perfect premise for a children's story that is beautifully delivered.

Bed-time story telling can be a chore for me with so much of the published stuff, but this would be a delight. A captivating read with wonderful characters.

Backed.

Terry

This is a wonderful children's story, full of fantasy and magic. T Cup is delightful and the whole idea of fairies having to earn their wings is brilliant! In contrast the Boglins are the villains of the story and there is no doubt of their intentions! I think children will love this story as it is full of imagination.
Wonderful writing, best of luck
Rachael
Dreamsacpe

An enchanting tale.
Fairies and Boglins ...and little Oliver...my youngest two children would absolutely love this!
Sarah Manfield is a talented children's author with a wonderful, colourful imagination.
Best,

Alison Butler

Crackingly good story. (I was about 8 years old again) and I love the fact that 'bombshell' words are dropped in like pultritudinous and peridot which will make a child either demand an explanation or run to a dictionary. And that is all GOOD.
Totally backed
Abel Kane
The Alchemists' Cookbook

OMW, my daughter has a wiggle, in her nose and you have now convinced her, and me, that she has some fairy genes. I wish we could buy this in paperback, it would make the perfect sunday afternoon read! Left in the hands of your latest fan, my young Jenna, on another pc, we give you our backing!
Angi

Hiya Sarah, love the narrative voice and the inventive storyline. great pace, fine mix of description and action.
happily shelved.
no marco quibbles as all.

saw a phrase or two that might be better simplified (for the youngest of your audience).
e.g., in ch 3:
"at this current moment in time" - maybe just - "now"

love the story. best wishes, andy

This story is absolutely wonderful and such a blessed release from the whelter of written misery that swirls around inside Authonomy. I started reading and instantly found, at first, my lips moving and then, before the end of the first page, I was reading it aloud - all to myself in my big lonely office. I now desperately want to find somewhere where I can read it aloud to a gaggle of little ones and watch their faces light up with enjoyment.

I feel young again. I feel the weight of the world has suddenly lifted off my shoulders. I feel hope and sunlight flooding through me. And all because of your enchanting writing and wonderful story (that just happens to be a book). Superb and thank you.

Hi Sarah,
I just love this book! You write in such a way as to make me feel like I am being told an amazing bedtime story. And in this vein, it is equally easy to read aloud. I especially enjoyed chapter five, so many kids are being subjected to bullying and the examples you give are so true to life, and unfortunately all-together too typical. Really lovely work here, you should feel proud, and I'll be keeping an eye out for you, pretty sure this book will move up in the charts quickly . . . besides with a little help from the fairies it is inevitable.
Wish I could back it twice . . . best of luck to you!

I came to critique your work -- you know, give feedback so it can be improved and make the editors desk in the very best condition possible (kind of the whole purpose of the site, in my humble opinion). Then I came across something in your bio so twisted I've decided to comment on that instead. That "I'm backing such-and-such and if you give me proof that you backed it I'll back you in return" defeats the purpose of your being here really. You've posted for all to see that you'll back ANYTHING, presumably without even reading it first, without any regard to its quality or any thought as to whether you'd buy it. Do you not think that your behaviour is being monitored by the site owners? Do you think a publishing house would want to take on an author (with all the risk and expense that comes with it) who is blatant about their lack of ethical standards/moral code? Honesty will prevail in the long run.

Utterly charming. You are a wonderful storyteller. These are true bedtime wonders that will have the children silenced and imagining within seconds. I assume it will be illustrated throughout. We must catch a glimpse of these charming little creatures.
all the best Sarah
Alice

Hello Sarah,
I too like your cover. Creatively done. Awesome YA story. Backed. Lisa

Absolutely a book to read to one's child. The calm authority with which dream fairies are explained will convince them they are real and the'll be hooked, and the reader gets to enjoy it too. I particualrly liked the idea of retired dream fairies getting to garden. The notion that our dreams reflect what is going on in our daily lives is not new but this way of working them out is. A nice way to confront bullying, having T cup on your side. All in all a charming book and the cover is great too. Backed with pleasure Jaye Hill

Sarah,
Absolutely loved it. Your descriptions, your fresh ideas, all so adorable. I loved it. Children would eat it up. Loved the hair and the different sized wings. Backed.
Caroline

Sarah, I found your writing style impressive and the descriptions—stylish. The characters are compelling and there was something special about the pace, it drew me. wonderful dialogue that supports the setting and atmosphere.
I wish you the best
I loved it.
Scott
The Esrevinu Chronicles/Secrets of the Elephant Rocks

This is charming. I love the names, T-cup, Boglin, Gobey, dream fairies, earth fairies, lovely. You write with such warmth drawing the child into a haven of beautiful words and stories.
You use the 'you' perspective which can be difficult but you have perfected it. Your touch is masterly as is the story.
You have a fine balance of action, description and dialogue, holding the child's attention.

Evey child would delight in this along with some adults. Moi for instance.:0)

Backed with pleasure,
Katy.xx
Phobic Dawn.

This is an enjoyable read perfectly geared toward your target audience. I could easily see this -- after some editing and shaping and whatnot -- becoming a favorite Bedtime Story book.

Just one thought:

The paragraph beginning "Yes, I know ... " That whole thing would read better as four separate sentences. Like, "Yes, I know. You think fairies live in trees and flowers and dance round toadstool rings. And they do. But I'm thinking of a different kind of fairy entirely." Something like that.

In fact, were you to revisit your work with an eye toward introducing full stops in lieu of commas, you'd find many opportunities to create a tighter, more seamless, smoother read.

That being said, it's a fun book written with that perfect combination of talent and whimsy with a touch of real world sarcasm thrown in for good measure. Or at least that's how I saw it. :^)

Jonathan
MARTUK ... THE HOLY

Leaf, Cloud, T-cup - even the names of the characters are just right in this delightful story, and you've sprinkled just the right amount of 'big' words that a child would have to ask the meaning of. I don't have children, but I can see this would be just the thing for a certain age. Editing can be done by HarperCollins before it goes on sale.
Backed with pleasure
Peter Wild
Double Action

l have no problems in backing this, l love the genre. your premise is good, and original. great style. and your intro says enough...on my watchlist for now...
read SEASONS...

interesting and original piece of children's fiction

Lynne Ellison

The Green Bronze Mirror

What a lovely story - beautifully told, and just the sort to become a best-seller. It deserves nothing less and I am happy to back you hoping that it will help.
Lizilev

Can't wait to read it, backed with pleasure. Thanks for backing our book Space Burps!

Delightful, magical and colourful, and what a magnificant cover. Backed with pleasure. Eunice - The Temple Dancer (and other books).

" ... and we beat them T-Cup." Comma after 'them.' When you address someone in dialogue, offset their name or title with commas. There are more cases of this type of problem. Other than that, you present us with a brilliant fantasy that grabbed me and kept me riveted. Credible characters. Crisp dialogue. Confident narrative. Vital writing. I absolutely love this thoughtfully composed story. Backed.

Hello Sarah. My daughter aged 8 demanded a print out ALL of your book and they my wife and I read it to her. [I dont know if to hart you or congratulate you !]. She loves T-Cup [fun name!] and her world. Thsi will be BIG. Percivere - mark my words. BACKED at least three times, If I could.
I would love you to look at mt Paperbats Adventures. I think your step-daughters might rather like them too. Let me know if they think it is worth backing!
Jerry [paperbat]

I've not read any purely children's fiction for a while, so decided to take this one for a spin. I'll bear in mind that you're in the middle of editing, Sarah. This is exactly to sort of story to regress right back for (in the absence of a child to read to). Having regressed, I feel no need to enquire about the retired dream fairy pension plan, but am content to know that the dream fairies have been more successful than the Boglins in my dreams recently.

I just love the name of T-cup for a fairy, and the descriptions of the different types of wings, especially Leaf's new ones. 'Are you away with the humans?' LOL one for the parents reading aloud. I like swearing, Boglin-style, 'Those rasted, drasted fairies'. Boglins make a fine contrast to the fairies.

I especially like what you've done with Oliver and Claire, 'it's only a text ... she's a girl'. The predicament is all too familiar, and Oliver just wants to keep the peace. These children aren't caricatures, they are recognisably real people with real problems. Oliver is gifted at art, Claire isn't but wishes she was, therefore Claire feels envy.

The combination of the everyday problems that bedevil many children's lives, with the magical worlds of dream fairies and Boglins, is a clever means to coax troubles into the open in a non-threatening way. This novel can be treated as just a nice bedtime story, or as a way to gently broach the subject of bullies ... backed.

Possible nits: 'no comparison to their colours' -> 'no comparison to fairy hair colours'. Consider this rewording [[as we haven't met Cloud yet]] 'lilacs, greens, yellows, blues and pinks (like T-cup). 'The fairy that [who] had got him'.