Blackthorne Faire: A Faerie Tale

Dear folks,

Yes, I do read and comment on everyone who comments here, and as many more as I possibly can. However, I use a different account. I feel it allows me to both give and receive more honest feedback. Frankly, I'd like to see my book do well because it's good (or, alas, vice versa) not because I've learned to game the system.

The feedback has been extremely helpful, and I am grateful.

John

The tags mention 'celtic' and 'faery', and from the opening chapter we are allowed to enter the authentic enchantment laced with cruelty of the true celtic faery tales. The chapter title, The Stolen Child, evokes memories of Yeats' poem, and the writing lives up to the associations. The narrator's voice here is both beautiful and cruel, as it needs to be. It is good to move away from that voice in the next chapter. Now we meet Erin, and Brian, and somehow we are living in the modern world without losing that touch of faery. The descriptions of the fair are colourful and enthralling, and the plot moves ahead with a page turning end to each chapter. This is a book written by an artist who knows the best way to interest and captivate his readers. Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

I love the voice in this, and your descriptiions. Squirrel woman! Magic. This is really great writing and I am enjoying it, in fact will read all that is posted. Wonderful. Backed

Goin on the shelf, I think. Original idea and very well-constructed prose, almost like poetry in parts. And of course you did include some Yeats.

good writing style- fluid and to the point, to relay your story with great effect...
this is on my watchlist...
read SEASONS...

John, I've started to read your book, and I find that I like it very much as far as I have read. I've put it on my WL, and given it a (temporary) star rating. I particularly like your prose. It is with the voice of a story teller of the old school - a lost art. Very well done so far.

Tim

Captivating and quite creepy. I like the way the human and faerie worlds exist in conjunction. I like the way you convey an air of underlying menace.

I liked this so much when I backed it some time ago, and I'm glad of the chance to give it another go on the bookshelf. Good luck. Ferret

Still completely enchanted by this one. You're on my WL and I will try and find some shelf space as soon as I can.

This is unique and distinct in the field. Your writing style is relaxed and easy to read without losing the readers interest, and the detail is superb. I was hooked from the start.

Backed with pleasure.
Abi xxx

First of all, I'm a huge folklore and mythology aficianodo. Second, this is one of my favorite genres ever! The speed and skill with which you get the story moving is fantastic. I think you also represented the Sidhe, in particular, fairly and originally, but with a respectful nod toward their origins.
Happily backed,
RC

A great read, very well done! I love the voice that runs through your writing and some of the language is used to really intrigue and relax the reader within the story.

Parts like 'Come, come closer...'
And then the amusing lines - 'And is she didn't tell the whole truth, well that's not the same as lying...'!!!

BACKED WITH PLEASURE
Aimee
His Pride, Her Prejudice

A well crafted story. A good read.
A zoomer.
(Going Out in Style)

Very nice work. The Renfaire setting comes to life, and the otherworldly hints and touches are worked in skilfully. You've got a large cast moving about here, and you manage their storylines well, but you might want to give the characters a little more room to establish themselves. In the interplay between Jimmy, Jamal, and Brian I had a little trouble keeping track of who was saying or doing what, and while it might have been my lack of focus at the time, maybe distinguish them a bit more each from the other? One really minor point - would Mick use a world like 'pretentious'?

I like stories about everyday people who are then dropped into unusual circumstances. This story is a good example of that as Brian's life is changed forever by a simple visit to a Renaissance Faire. Your writing style is clean and keeps this moving forward. It's a good read. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

A compelling, gripping opening chapter that leads onto a well written and enchanting story. Well worth reading and backing.

One enters the perilous realm of the sidhe with extreme caution and you bring out the cruel beauty of Faerie very well. Touches of the Celtic are deftly woven into your prose. A few reckon that you are a bit overblown - have they looked at the Book of Kells? This is building into a good tale. Poor dull Brian! Jim D Serpent's Blood

I love this. I love the description of the Fairy Ride - Your fairies have an authentic danger and nastiness and I want to read the whole book. Backed.

Please take it as a compliment when I say this has shades of Raymond Feist's Faery Tale. Your opening chapter is gripping, beautiful and cruel. The descriptions and dialogue at the Fair are fun and engaging. There are signals of a darker turn to the story on the way. I would read more if you uploaded it...please? Backed, and I wish you all the best.

I was captivated when I read the opening, it was just like a Richard Dadd painting come to life.

I'm afraid this isn't my type of book. You have visual imagry here, I just couldn't keep up with it as I think, fo myself that it is too wordy, too much said to get the point across. But, that is my opinion and eveyone knows the value of opinions. From the ones I looked at others liked what they read probably because it fits what they like.in a book. I think you have talent and a great way of tellng your story. It just isn't for me and it doesn't come up to what I am looking for in a book. Good luck.

I'm afraid this isn't my type of book. You have visual imagry here, I just couldn't keep up with it as I think, fo myself that it is too wordy, too much said to get the point across. But, that is my opinion and eveyone knows the value of opinions. From the ones I looked at others liked what they read probably because it fits what they like.in a book. I think you have talent and a great way of tellng your story. It just isn't for me and it doesn't come up to what I am looking for in a book. Good luck.

A pleasure from beginning to end. I enjoy visiting renaissance fairs but I've never found one like this and never thought a novel could be built around one.

One I would like to buy.

Great opening I haven't time to read more thn the first chapter at the moment. I love the style of your writting and would love to see it do well. Good luck.

Charlie. x

This lovely beautiful fantasy writing.. although fantasy isn't my first genre of choice I would read a story such as the because of the realistic element of Brian interwoven with a faery world with Erin.

Your pitch is great which is what initially pulled me in and would be enough for me to read on. To find such lovely writing as well was merely a bonus.

Backed

Jo xx

Spoilt

This is extremely good writing. You have an economy of words which conveys deepest meaning and mood in an understated way, allowing the reader's imagination complete freedom, yet reined with subtle control. Your imagery is quite sublime, and the story is full of unexpected twists and turns which surprise and delight. Backed with pleasure. Best wishes, Tony.

John
I can’t believe I haven’t read this before now. There is a real ring to your book title and this is just the sort of pitch I go for. Wonderful premise.
Very early on it is clear you are an accomplished writer. This is strong writing. Excellent scene painting and I enjoy the early interaction of Seamus and Betty – what a devil! Ha-ha!
For me, this has an unusual but very charming voice. More than once you bridge with the reader and appeal for them to ‘Look!’ etc. This makes we wonder how well this would work for a YA readership because of how it engages the imagination. It also works well when read aloud.
I love the section with the fair folk appearing. Nice description of sizes etc. It is evident you’ve done your research well too.
Once again, our Seamus disappoints, alas. – ha-ha!
And wow! What an end of chapter hook for the opening. I’m going to have to pop back for more to see how you top this. This is excellent work! If I were in a bookshop now, I would buy this.
In some ways this reminds me of some of my favourite books: Jonathon Strange by Susanna Clarke is a must read if you haven’t already and also Adelaide Short by AnnabelleP (on the site). I’ll provide the link below because Annabelle’s work is not only well worth a read but it also made the ED a little while back and got a review from Harper Collins.
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=6104
Good luck with all!
Shelved with pleasure
David
Green Ore

Hi John,

I took a quick look at your book, and was immediately captivated.

I'm always amused (rather than enthusiastic) by Renaissance Fairs, but I never realized what an ideal background one would make for a fantasy novel.

I'm delighted to shelve your book, and hope you will post some more so I can discover how it ends.

Since my book, A TASTE OF VOODOO, is also a fantasy - albeit for children - I'd appreciate if you would take a look at it and comment on it.

Best wishes,
Douglas Braverman

A marvelous premise, or should i say, the premise promised the marvelousl.
I was not disappointed. Clever with palapable writing, something thrilling for my eyes.
A pleasure to read.

BACKED

Beautiful, magical and poetic. You draw the reader in, I really enjoyed the rythm of the writing. Shelved!

Best wishes,

Agneta

Dear folks,

Yes, I do read and comment on everyone who comments here, and as many more as I possibly can. However, I use a different account. I feel it allows me to both give and receive more honest feedback. Frankly, I'd like to see my book do well because it's good (or, alas, vice versa) not because I've learned to game the system.

The feedback has been extremely helpful, and I am grateful.

John

Hey, John.
I'm reading Blackthorne Faire.
While I'm not a fan of this genre, this is just too good to ignore. Your cover seems so very tame that when I began reading the prelude I was very much surprised. A lot of descriptive, but done nicely, clean and crisp, and with good cadence. Cool narrative style; haunting, freaky and painful--quite the set-up for chapter one, which I also found engaging. Smooth dialogue, too. Good tags.
I shall shelve you, post haste!
JDeHart/POST 60

The tags mention 'celtic' and 'faery', and from the opening chapter we are allowed to enter the authentic enchantment laced with cruelty of the true celtic faery tales. The chapter title, The Stolen Child, evokes memories of Yeats' poem, and the writing lives up to the associations. The narrator's voice here is both beautiful and cruel, as it needs to be. It is good to move away from that voice in the next chapter. Now we meet Erin, and Brian, and somehow we are living in the modern world without losing that touch of faery. The descriptions of the fair are colourful and enthralling, and the plot moves ahead with a page turning end to each chapter. This is a book written by an artist who knows the best way to interest and captivate his readers. Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

Your writing has a beautiful lilt to it, and I enjoyed the change of voice when Brian entered the book. The prologue is gripping, as all good prologues should be - and terrifying too! Backed with pleasure. Kittykat

Hello John,

First of all, this was a fantastic, original voice. We don't find this out immediately, but we have a first-person narrator, and a very subjective one at that. "Poor lad!" and other interjections allow us to take sides with this narrator, even though we do not fully trust him. The atmosphere you portray, the lovers' tryst, the scents, sounds and colours of autumn (absolutely bang on the money for the time of reading for me!), are all bewitching and beguiling in some way. The way the faerie folk are introduced is equally memorable and the stolen child leaves us wanting to know more about this world. It's set in a sort-of half reality, a bit like parts of Philip Pullman's Dark Materials trilogy, and I'm fascinated by those kind of not-quite-right worlds are depicted. This was very polished stuff, glad to have a look at it

Pat Black
Snarl

Right from the word go I was drawn in. All Hallow's Eve, did it for me. And I found myself tripping over myself to read on. What a great premise, great writing, great characters, great dialogue.
This has everything I would look for in a book and more.
You really have done a wonderful job with this. Nothing I can nitpick for it is simply really well done.
P.S. I have always loved the name Seamus. I have one in my novel and I would seriously consider naming my child it.
BAcked.
T.L Tyson=Seeking Eleanor

The atmosphere created by this work reminded me of Neil Gaiman and especially the wonderful drawings by Charles Vess in issue 1 of 'Stardust' (yes, it was a comic before it was a book or a movie) and issue 3 of 'The Books of Magic: The Land of Summer's Twilight'..........I know, I know...but I love faeries...and this book also has the Mob!!!!
Backed

It's well written, I must admit, with a distinctive style. The voice is a bit too intrusive on the story, for mine, but that's just a personal quirk. Strangely enough, I'm going to back purely for the voice, because although it's not my cuppa, I think it will be someone's, and 'tis better to polarise than create indifference. Watch for redundancies like "brief moment".

Regards,

TomW

A very unique prologue--very unique in indeed. And your opening: "In years later, the vast suburban sprawl of Atlanta will bleed outwards...what an opening! And the fact that it didn't take long before you introduced your main character, Betty, her life in the meadow, like every other girl her age, in love with Keith..."chewing the end of a straw of autumn hay...I can piture him waering a dark hat worn at its brim, white shirt brown with dust and black pants too short at the ankles and too large a the waist, perhaps held with a rope...hay all over him. And Betty, her caprices...her father...
I really love the way you write. It's so vivid that you see, it can rouse one's imagination.

Emma Philips
The Dark Intruder

Blackthorne Faire is a tour-de-force of imagination that creates a magical world with a sure hand. The prelude places the reader in the heart of a vivid alternative reality populated with characters that will delight lovers of fantasy. The transition to to the real world in C1 is deftly handled, and I have no doubt that things will continue in the same vein. This is a fine piece of work - I've got no editorial suggestions here. Backed.

Unputdownable. Plain and simple. Excellent writing. Backed by me!

John, how intriguing! And the description is so vivid. Can't wait to read more. -- Candee

Dear John,

We, the writer/readers, flit like ghosts, unheard and unfelt. we are spying spirits of the future.
The fairies, in a mesmerising and menacing display at All Hallows Eve in 1936 drive a daring young lover over the cliff.
Sixty nine year later, at a Renaissance festival, we get to know Ernin ... She found a penny, but it was face down so she didn't pick it up. Instead, with a laugh, she turned it over to let someone else find it and have the luck ... We learn a lot more about Ernin in a delightful exchange with Catlain who stitches costumes.
Then the festival starts and Brian appears and the plot thickens.
This is irresistable writing spinning a spellbinding story.

Pia (Course of Mirrors)

wow!
you really have a great sense of style! I mean the way you started the book with all the great discription you had. It hooked me like no other book dead!!

backed!!!
Kimmy

The beginning was unique, rather like finding an old book and blowing the dust off. I found I was reading it with an Irish accent, so I was! That is a good thing. The fair was compelling to read naturally, with the colour of the characters showing through. Altogether worthy of a Backing, sir. x

Hi John this is really well done. The voice of the narrator really drew me in, there is a mocking tone to it, a darkness. Your descriptions are beautiful and almost poetic. I was lured in by the beauty of the scene when the faeries first arrived but the voice made me hold back its tone made everything feel a little sinister and then of course it turned that way. Your descriptions of the cruelty to Seamus and Keith are written in such a way that they are a mix of beauty and horror and it fells strange, but good strange, I'm finding it hard to explain how I felt when I read that piece but its enough to say you made me feel something and when writing does that its great. This is really very good and I wish I had time to read on. It is on my shelf there is no doubt in that. Well done. Helena (A Load of Rubbish)

Hi there, tarot cards, myth, magic and mystery. What more could I want? (We have a few things in common here!) I adore the premise and the pitch, and the writing lived up to the promise. Great voice, descriptions and I really felt part of your world, which is one of the keys to successful novel writing apparently. I sincerely hope this gets published soon. Shelved with pleasure. Sarah (A Midsummer Night's Secret)

Your writing is like a captured whirlwind and it flows along captivating the reader. I really enjoyed what I read and I couldn’t see anything to nit pick about. Great descriptions and the ending of the prologue was for me unexpected. I think your dialogue in chapter one is very good. I will back your book with pleasure.

Tony

I like a flawed hero, your got burned by his ex and your heroine is a total sweetheart...who wouldn't want to see them together? You got the voice, your descriptions are vivid, there's a sense of place and time, you've the recipe for a winner here. Stopped at chapter 4 and will stop by again to read more. Shelved.

Ednah (The Nephilim Awakening)

Hi John,

I've had time to read the prelude, Chapter 1 and Chapter 7.

Your writing style stays consistent throughout and what I particulary enjoyed was the way you describe things so well but in so little words. I always wonder while writing if I need to add more to the story to add to the reader's vision but you do this ever so well and make the characters come alive in the mind's eye (almost effortlessy).

I loved the hook at the end of Chapter 7 - this will compel the reader to turn the page straight away.

An enjoyable read and one that I wish you well with.

John, you have a real gift with words. All the senses are evoked. I was immediately drawn in and felt this magical place. I instantly cared for the characters, the human ones at least, and enjoyed their motives, dialogue, everything. Surely people will eat this up. Loved the imagery and your musings, just not the disturbing pit in my heart and stomach afterwards. The writing is flawless, but I'm not sure I want to go further due to personal preferences.

Hi John, The enchantment mounted in Chapter 1 – very fluent and panoramic. I thought it was going to give a fairy tone to a real world but then Betty was stolen away! Very effective although sometimes the description seemed a bit over-balancing. Yet I enjoyed how this aura at the fair was so strong that it could affect the costumed women and Brian. Although he escaped pretty quickly into business, I was entranced to see how the surroundings might alter the story's events. Shelved – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

I had the most extraordinary , vividly coloured , darkly beautiful and mysterious dream last night. I put it all down to reading Blackthorne Faire at bedtime. I was so entranced, I was furious when the puppy woke me up. That is the power of fantastic writing....well done John!