Learning Curve: A Married Woman's Coming Out Story

I'm...speechless...ready to cry. I think someone else commented that it was like looking in a mirror.

I've never been to all those fascinating places or taken many daring risks with my life...heck I hardly even had the guts to move out of my parents house until two years after college...

but I am identifying with your story. You've written it well. I see a few choppy parts where seams appear, but who cares? It's a great story and I'm reading it past the first few chapters. That means it's publishing material, in my book.

Good Luck

reading this was like looking in a mirror. expertly told !

Andy

I love the way you put this out there.
To be honest this is not the first time I have heard a story liek this. My friend Sarah when to Europe and came back a lesbian. It is an inside joke amongst our friends but she just said that she was opened up to who she really is. We love her. And now she is living with the most amazing woman.
I appreciate stories like these.
Bravo, for writing this book and also for realizing what you wanted and being strong enough to give yourself it.
Backed
T.L Tyson-Seeking Eleanor

Well written and interesting, you do a good job here. Best of luck with this.

this really was outside my box - and I'm touched by your words - god bless you

backed

kev

Hi AM!

This is raw and honest, and very well written. I'm loving what I have read so far... I've got a friend - an old buddy from college - that has had (and still is to some extent) to come out to friends and family. She worries about it all the time, so I understand a little bit about the range of emotions one has to go through - fear, shame, anxiety, dread, the list goes on...

Marketing stuff first... If you can, try and get an eye-catching book cover - one that will set your book apart from the rest here. You'll grab more attention to the book if you can. The pitch - well written. I love the short intro - it's always good to either start or end the marketing pitch with a question. It compells the reader to plunge into the book to find out the answers. The only suggestion I would make is to not repeat the question in the longer intro. And if you can, add some more meat to the pitch - talk about the people involved (give names, connect the reader to the people in your book), describe the range of emotions your work will go through... Your dialogue is very emotional - nicely done! I'm reading on, but pausing briefly to send this comment over and back the book. Great job with this!

Kim
Invisible Justice

Inside, everything is beautifully written - honest, clear, easy to read through. The prologue does a nice job of setting up the story. I see people go back and forth about prologues here. I like it, for what it's worth. In chapter one, first paragraph - I'd think about sectioning that into two paragraphs, hard return before the sentence that starts with Ryan. Since the POV switches, I think a new paragraph might be in order. Your book, your call. I just thought it might have more punch if Ryan's difference of opinion was set apart.

Beautiful story, true life is always more interesting the fiction. I am eager to read more. My feedback would be to take another look at the beginning of the story. The last few chapters are smoother and more cohesive than the first half. I understand you need to build your character and case but as a reader I think it would be more beneficial to build your character by choosing a few "stories" within your life's history and really focus on where you were and how you felt in the moment so it feels more intimate and less like a narrative. Introducing the letters to Patrick was a good way to start sharing your emotions in a way that is more natural for you.
I'd love to get your critique on my short stories that deal with glbt issues, they can be found in chapters two and three of my book
Great read, waiting for more!
Nicole
A Series of Confessions and Sordid Tales

Interesting prospect. I always wonder how someone 'knows' they are homosexual, in the same way I wonder how a pregnant person 'knows' they want to eat coal. Neither resolve is one experienced by the person before, so makes me question the reasoning behind it, as you do here. Perhaps it is little more than a craving for something new and different, grass is greener and all that. I find it interesting that you say, 'discover' you are a lesbian. It seems almost as sudden and bizarre as 'discovering' you like eating light bulbs. Anyway, thought provoking book.

Andrew

Awwwww- I have read all - and thee is no more - I want more!!!!!!!! Easy to read, great writing and this will resonate with so many women. I strongly believe that the soul is sexless and when we incarnate for this lifetime we take a male or female role and we fall in love with a person, to that extent we are all bisexual, some people tune more into it and then a preference is formed - Just my opinion - but it resonates so clearly what I think a lot of women at some stage in their life consider. Brave story. Is this under your real name? If so how do the other characters feel about the writing? Have they read it? Well done - you are on my shelf and I have backed the book.

This is really very good. It's almost hard to believe that it's a true story. I certainly can't say much though, I haven't read many true-life stories.

The way you write I can actually picture what's going on; awesome, awesome it is!

This is really very good. It's almost hard to believe that it's a true story. I certainly can't say much though, I haven't read many true-life stories.

The way you write I can actually picture what's going on; awesome, awesome it is!

Your book shows very plainly the difficulty, the hardships for all involved and the feelings of guilt and hesitation that someone in Andie's situation would feel! I certainly can identify, as Part 2 of my book "Travels Through Love and Time" called "Moderato" has a similar theme...I might sound pushy, but I would love to know what you think of my book. This is because the heroine is struggling with similar feelings, though in different circumstances. In the meantime, I'll shelve your book! it's an important topic, thank you!
I like the way it takes place all over the world, too...Maybe you could make it less of a straight narrative, and give it more a sense of place and time...but I am not a good one for style advice :)

Thanks to everyone who has mentioned that the hook leads them to expect more surprise or shock. Based on that feedback I will try restructuring by giving you a more juicy first chapter that relates directly to coming out. Originally I wanted that to be a surprise, but the backstory has more of a "why I should have known sooner" aspect to it.

Not sure how quickly that will happen, but please come back and see how the change works for you.

I am so glad to see that you are a part of the Harper True list....that is precisely where this belongs.
I think you have a very easy style that all readers could enjoy. I also love the brevity of the chapters. I think shorter chapters are way more effective, in any genre.
Also, your dialogue is very real.
Keep up the good work--I placed you on my shelf yesterday!
Best,
Leslie Tall Manning
"Knock'n on Wood"

Hi Coco
An interesting story you have here. I see that Paxie has already suggested the Harpertrue category.
I was actually expecting to be a little more shocked. According to the pitch that is. Waking up to discover you are a lesbian. I would use this to your advantage as it is a real hook, something that drew me to read the story.
Anyway. It's on my shelf for a spin. I hope it does well.
Best wishes
Sue

Coco

I read first two chapters......Would be nice if you're still friends with Ryan......

Have you cast your eye over the www.harpertrue.com adverts here on the site.....You send harpertrue 2000 words of your true life story,,,,, and if they like it, they more or less 'ghost your manuscript' bringing it up to 'global fame status'.........Why not give it a spin ?

It's very well written....It reads as though you sat down and wrote it all out in one night.....

Shelved......and will keep on my WL to read some more......
Would like your view on mine,,,, think you'd like it.

Hi Coco
Your story is well written.
Your short pitch says "What do you do when you wake up etc and discover you're a lesbian". This reads as if it is a total shock but it is clear from Chapter 2 that you already had lesbian feelings seven years earlier so I'm not sure that the pitch fits.
Good luck with your book.
John

I read the first couple of chapters and I really like this. I want to read some more this weekend but will back this the next time I move books around due to I think you put your all in this book. The best of luck to you.

Thank you! I will check your book out too. CMD

Learning Curve: A Married Woman's Coming Out Story

Hi Coco,

Brave this, honest and open, humane and warm. Gutsy thing to do, by turns, husband then family, I wonder exactly how much umming and ahhing you must have had to do, but in the end, as I can see from the first few chapters here, it is about personal honesty with oneself, in the end you had to, to be truly yourself, I can see that and although I haven't read it all yet, I will pop back and do that, my hope is that your family accepted it, my worry is that at least someone didn't. And then, what do I discover in Chapter Two, but Alaska, a place I've always wanted to visit and you do a good job of capturing that excitement and the freshness of this new land. The story moves at a pace and the decision to put the flash-forward at the beginning is a strong piece of storytelling (real-life or not this still has to be a story). You have our emotional sympathy, equally so does your husband, now that is clever writing, honest writing, writing that reflects what happened. Good luck with the Harper True angle here, this is a great human interest story that will give heart to many. If you have the time to take a peek at my book it would be so helpful.

Best wishes and good luck
Andrew W.
(Sanctuary's Loss)

Hi Coco
I read the first two chapters. It was an enjoyable and insightful read. The very best of luck with this. I have it backed. All the very best.
Leigh Fallon
The Carrier of the Mark

Learning Curve: A Married Woman's Coming Out Story

Hi Coco,

Brave this, honest and open, humane and warm. Gutsy thing to do, by turns, husband then family, I wonder exactly how much umming and ahhing you must have had to do, but in the end, as I can see from the first few chapters here, it is about personal honesty with oneself, in the end you had to, to be truly yourself, I can see that and although I haven't read it all yet, I will pop back and do that, my hope is that your family accepted it, my worry is that at least someone didn't. And then, what do I discover in Chapter Two, but Alaska, a place I've always wanted to visit and you do a good job of capturing that excitement and the freshness of this new land. The story moves at a pace and the decision to put the flash-forward at the beginning is a strong piece of storytelling (real-life or not this still has to be a story). You have our emotional sympathy, equally so does your husband, now that is clever writing, honest writing, writing that reflects what happened. Good luck with the Harper True angle here, this is a great human interest story that will give heart to many. If you have the time to take a peek at my book it would be so helpful.

Best wishes and good luck
Andrew W.
(Sanctuary's Loss)

Thanks for your comment about my story being compelling, that's the most encouraging thing I've heard yet. And also for the suggestion re long paragraphs, I can see the difference now.

Coco,

The fact that you've written your full pitch in first person got my attention. Although many writers of memoirs and narrative non-fiction pitch their story in third person, first person is the correct way to write a pitch.

Some stories are written to entertain;some are written to take us away from the day to day humdrum of the real world; and some are written because the writer has a compelling true life story that just needs to be told. You've written a compelling story that needs to be told.

My only suggestion would be to break up some of the long paragraphs.

Shelved
Rodney

Interesting premise. There is a similar book on here but with the guy in the same position. I'll add it to my WL for a read later in the week
Good luck
Sue
A Boy Called George

As has been pointed out to me, you need to chop up the paragraphs.
Long paragraphs does make the book hard to read, it needs to be much 'lighter' that is to say (and I basically quote) don't remove words, re-read your words and you'll see where you can put new paragraphs.

The book is well written, left me wondering how many relationships are this way, and the people don't see it?

good luck

JanB
Table for One

Coco,

The fact that you've written your full pitch in first person got my attention. Although many writers of memoirs and narrative non-fiction pitch their story in third person, first person is the correct way to write a pitch.

Some stories are written to entertain;some are written to take us away from the day to day humdrum of the real world; and some are written because the writer has a compelling true life story that just needs to be told. You've written a compelling story that needs to be told.

My only suggestion would be to break up some of the long paragraphs.

Shelved
Rodney