Book Jacket

 

rank 1612
word count 93179
date submitted 27.10.2009
date updated 10.07.2011
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Fantasy,...
classification: moderate
complete

Crane's Way

Karen Eisenbrey

REVISED JUNE 2011. A young wizard who fears his own power sets out to right an old wrong, and discovers nothing is as he assumed.

 

Deep River is a village where nothing happens and nothing changes. The river is dry; nobody leaves but the dead.

Crane, Deep River's self-taught wizard, is afraid of his own power. When he learns that his village was cursed when he was born, he decides to find the wizard responsible. He follows the river into an ancient forest more powerful than any wizard, and meets a secretive girl who may have more power than he does.

Just as Crane begins to have confidence in his skills, he discovers that much he assumed to be true . . . isn't. This is especially the case regarding his enemy, who turns out to be something he never imagined. As Crane masters his power and grapples with issues of family, regret, and love, he must rethink his past and re-imagine his future. He must find his own way.

Appropriate for adults and teens - attention span required! If you're intrigued by the opening but lack time to read the whole thing, check out chapter 18 or 26. 18 marks the literal, spiritual, and narrative center of the book; 26 includes the scene that started it all.

 
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tags

family, fantasy, forest, love, magic, quest, volcano, wizard, young adult

on 18 watchlists

114 comments

 

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Bocri wrote 590 days ago

Crane's Way is a work of incomparable imagery and ethereal perspectives. The description of the panorama under the eagle's flight path sets the tone, in quality prose, descriptive power and creativity for the remainder of the work. Accepting the advice to check out a later chapter I found 16 & 25 to maintain the earlier quality of balanced and measured storytelling. It is the major downside of this site that a work of this standard should be available but recognised by so few. BACKED. Robert Davidson. The Tuzla Run

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 427 days ago

Karen,
"Crane's Way" had me soaring for starters in a majestic eagle making possible a bird's eye view of Deep River. The pithy prose and lively dialogue gave the book energy. I was iintrigued to watch Crane's progress from inquisitve youngster to romantic hero with al the challenges in between. It's a good YA story to curl up with in a cozy chair. Thank you so much for making this book available.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Karen Eisenbrey wrote 339 days ago

Thanks to some astute comments here, I went back and took another look at this book, which I have been writing and revising, off and on, for 11 years. The last big revision was 4 years ago and I thought it was "done." Some necessary technical changes gave me a way in, and I managed to cut at least 4000 words, which I don't think will be missed. The happiest news is that I loved the story -- I laughed and cried and shuddered as if I didn't write it myself!

Thanks, everybody.

Karen

a.morrison712 wrote 231 days ago

I came over to take a look at your work. Thanks again for your comment on Maddy Hatfield, it was greatly appreciated. Really sincere and well thought out comments are hard to come by these days. I do not comment on grammar as I do not feel like I am strong enough in this area to do so. I will simply comment as a fellow reader of the fantasy genre. I was drawn to this by the promise of the "forests and wizards and magic." It sounded like an interesting tale. The line that really pulled me in was "Crane was a boy not a bird..." It had me smiling. I'm wondering what your thoughts are on labeling this as a children's story? The MC seems pretty young and I can see those in the Middle Grades really liking this book. Just something to think over, especially since I don't have any grammar comments for you to think over. :) Best of luck with your story and thanks again for your support of Maddy Hatfield!

Best,

Ashley

Arion Naomi wrote 242 days ago

I have to say that I read the majority of this on my cellphone's tiny screen. It did not do proper justice. Such an inspired piece of work! I felt like I was a part of the world itself as I read at work. It did get me into a spot of trouble too. I didn't know what to expect from this reading the summary, but it blew everything away. I highly recommend that you send out query letters as you may get better luck that relying on just this site for your publicity. This is publish worthy and could, maybe - maybe mind you! - stand one last edit before you start applying with publishers. This is wonderful and definitely on my shelf.

celticwriter wrote 257 days ago

Hi Karen, be happy to reback. You take the genre and make it your own...I enjoy your writing style. :-)

blessings,
jim

a.morrison712 wrote 258 days ago

I read through Chapter 1 and will watch list this to come back for more. So far, it is a good start. The revisions in June must have paid off! I love the descriptions you give, especially of the "silent meeting room" in the second to the last paragraph. I can't think of any negative comments, other than I wish I had more time to read and didn't have to be in class! I can see this one going far, and I look forward to Chapter 2! Best of luck with it!

Ashley
Maddy Hatfield and the Magic Locket

elmo2 wrote 316 days ago

i am not a fantasy reader, though i realize it is a valid and useful form as any other for revealing character and understanding, that being said, i like this piece, i have read the first three chapters and chapters 18 and 26 as suggested, i find your lanquage and writing to be best in chapter 18, you do capture the northwest here, very descriptive, the marmat reminds me of my trip to the olympic mountains, lots of "be" verbs, espeically was's, in the early going, sometimes they make things a bit static, though perhaps they are very useful in creating "another" world, this is romance, but heck, sometimes good does conquer, why not, i am starring it generously and putting it on my watch list, this is publishable, if you get a chance could you take a look at either "crow diary" or "the sound not heard", two pieces i have up, best wishes

Red2u wrote 330 days ago

I am not sure what was revised as I have only read the first chapter today. It's wonderfully written and definately caught my attention. A seveteen year old boy growing into a man... his dreams I felt your character was real and drew me in. I have placed it on my WL and rated well. It's a good book!
Red

Karen Eisenbrey wrote 339 days ago

Thanks to some astute comments here, I went back and took another look at this book, which I have been writing and revising, off and on, for 11 years. The last big revision was 4 years ago and I thought it was "done." Some necessary technical changes gave me a way in, and I managed to cut at least 4000 words, which I don't think will be missed. The happiest news is that I loved the story -- I laughed and cried and shuddered as if I didn't write it myself!

Thanks, everybody.

Karen

jlbwye wrote 376 days ago

Crane's Way.
Prologue. Great descriptive writing. I like the picture of the stream leaping over cliffs... gathering the offerings of smaller creeks. Beautifully written. A gentle mystery leads me on.

Ch.1. This is a book to be kept at one's side and savoured as the stroy of Crane unfolds. Why is he so unpopular?

Ch.2. Oh - so Crane is a wizard in the making... You chat away in comfortable style, and I am caught up in the ambience of your folk-like story.
You have the gift of introducing new characters without overwhelming the reader, and you reveal back story seamlessly.

Ch.3. I cannot fault your style or grammar. There arent even any typos - you've clearly got an excellent editor.
But I wonder if it is necessary to say who is speaking, for every single paragraph of dialogue? Especially when only two people are talking. I think yours would flow better if you used different techniques, like "Why not, Eric? I've always been alone up to now." - when you feel the reader might be getting lost.
In the short paragraph about the two youths racing past the school, you mention the names Elic and Crane three times each.

I'm not going to jump to Chs. 16 and 25. I havent learned how to sweep through a book and comment on chunks of chapters. I prefer to read the stories I like from beginning to end, in thorough fashion, making notes as I go. Yours is going to be one of my favourites, but it will take time on this site, as I have several in rotation, and one has to back a book for at least ten days to be meaningful.

I'm glad I've found you! I'll fiddle a place on my shelf as soon as possible. Meanwhile, maxi-stars.
Jane. (Breath of Africa).

Karen Eisenbrey wrote 390 days ago

My God, he's right! I love this scene, but if I were writing it today, I would not do it like this. I can't believe I didn't change it in the last revision (2007), but it just goes to show how one's style can evolve over just a few years. This may give me the way into a new revision I have been waffling about. Thanks, Al.

Karen

I read your prologue and first two chapters.

General comments: An engaging start. An interesting main character. Good world building. Vivid descriptions. Not much tension. Leisurely pacing that seems appropriate for this story.

Specific comments on the prologue:
1) "Because you've already been put to bed once tonight," Mama laughed. Period after 'tonight.' The only time the last sentence of dialogue is punctuated with a comma is when it is followed by a dialogue tag. Since you can't laugh dialogue, 'Mama laughed' is clearly not a dialogue tag, so the last sentence of dialogue should be punctuated with a period.
2) "It's too bright to sleep," he pouted. Period after 'sleep' and 'he' should be capitalized. You can't pout dialogue.
3) "I see ... Papa!" he giggled. Capitalize 'he.' You can't giggle dialogue.
4) "It wasn't always so," she sighed. Period after 'so' and capitalize 'she.' You can't sigh dialogue.

Specific comments on the first chapter:
1) "When it will be hot," Crane chuckled. Period after 'hot.' You can't chuckle dialogue.

Specific comments on the second chapter:
1) ' ... but Crane could feel unseen eyes watching ... ' Try to avoid using the word 'feel.' Just describe the feeling so the reader can experience the feeling along with Crane. When you do this, the reader will be drawn deeper into your story and 'Crane could feel' will be implied.
2) In the first fourteen paragraphs you use 'smile' five times. Three times in the first five paragraphs alone.
3) "And his father before, I suppose," Crane laughed. Period after 'suppose.' You can't laugh dialogue.

I hope this critique helps you further polish these all important early chapters. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Would you please look at "Savannah Fire?"

Have a fabulous day.

Al

CarolinaAl wrote 390 days ago

I read your prologue and first two chapters.

General comments: An engaging start. An interesting main character. Good world building. Vivid descriptions. Not much tension. Leisurely pacing that seems appropriate for this story.

Specific comments on the prologue:
1) "Because you've already been put to bed once tonight," Mama laughed. Period after 'tonight.' The only time the last sentence of dialogue is punctuated with a comma is when it is followed by a dialogue tag. Since you can't laugh dialogue, 'Mama laughed' is clearly not a dialogue tag, so the last sentence of dialogue should be punctuated with a period.
2) "It's too bright to sleep," he pouted. Period after 'sleep' and 'he' should be capitalized. You can't pout dialogue.
3) "I see ... Papa!" he giggled. Capitalize 'he.' You can't giggle dialogue.
4) "It wasn't always so," she sighed. Period after 'so' and capitalize 'she.' You can't sigh dialogue.

Specific comments on the first chapter:
1) "When it will be hot," Crane chuckled. Period after 'hot.' You can't chuckle dialogue.

Specific comments on the second chapter:
1) ' ... but Crane could feel unseen eyes watching ... ' Try to avoid using the word 'feel.' Just describe the feeling so the reader can experience the feeling along with Crane. When you do this, the reader will be drawn deeper into your story and 'Crane could feel' will be implied.
2) In the first fourteen paragraphs you use 'smile' five times. Three times in the first five paragraphs alone.
3) "And his father before, I suppose," Crane laughed. Period after 'suppose.' You can't laugh dialogue.

I hope this critique helps you further polish these all important early chapters. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Would you please look at "Savannah Fire?"

Have a fabulous day.

Al

Jacoba wrote 398 days ago

Hi Karen,
I enjoyed the prologue and the first chapter. I like the little boy's dialogue with his mother and the way she sent him to sleep with her stories.
As has been mentioned in other comments your writing is polished and has a lyrical, soft flow to it.
I fear that the story seems to get lost in the prose at times and the reader can drift in and out of the plot. I think with some editing and tightening of the writing this could do really well for your target audience.
I only noticed one edit that I thought might read better. This is only a suggestion so feel free to ignore.
Cheers Jacoba

Or that he could take flight like the eagle circling high overhead. (replaced wing with flight)

Intriguing Trails wrote 420 days ago

Crane's Way
Fiction 3rd person, multiple
What a poetic, graceful style you have!

The premise to the story is excellent and the writing flows like water. Lovely writing! The imagery is excellent!
Mechanics, perfect.
The pacing, IMO, tends to drag just a bit with a little more prose than most readers will want to see. I like it, just wonder how it will fly since it doesn't fly...

The fluid style is very professional. It will probably have a wide following.

I wonder if the boy, Crane would visulize things the way portrayed as the characterization seems more feminine than masculine. Characters seem to all be of like thinking through Ch 1, though a conflict is suggested.

The mystery about the river is keen and well developed by the end of Ch 1. This brings a curiosity to play.

IMO, a stronger hook and faster pacing would keep readers riveted on this story. The writing is good, but the book seems more about the writing than about the plot or characters. Not critism, just observation.

Raechel
Echo

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 427 days ago

Karen,
"Crane's Way" had me soaring for starters in a majestic eagle making possible a bird's eye view of Deep River. The pithy prose and lively dialogue gave the book energy. I was iintrigued to watch Crane's progress from inquisitve youngster to romantic hero with al the challenges in between. It's a good YA story to curl up with in a cozy chair. Thank you so much for making this book available.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Kim D wrote 433 days ago

Karen, I've read the first three chapters as promised. Your story is well crafted and beautifully visual. I'm pleased you've made the environment quite different to the other wizard world we know so well! One small point - for YA readers I think you need a few more hooks at the very beginning to grab their attention.
But a job well done.
Kim
St Viper's School for Super Villains

celticwriter wrote 552 days ago

Hi Karen,
Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments, and I take your notes to heart. I've enjoyed your work. I'm not a critic, just someone who simply enjoys a good journey. Nicely done, love the visuals, and would make a terrific movie. :-)

blessings,
jim

Benjamin Dancer wrote 562 days ago

You wanted to see how the end held up. So I went there. Here are my notes:

I thought for a minute I might be in middle grade fiction--then the dress came off.

I loved the line: "Prove it."

There are some really interesting archetypes about relationships here. Feel what you feel. Swallowed up.

I had the ahha when Crane became a large, white bird. So obvious now.

I got the sense this story had some dark themes. We don't have a pretty bow and the end to tie everything up. There was an authenticity to that.

There were constant metaphors, a way probing at what it means to be in relationship.

I do want to comment on genre in your messages.

Bocri wrote 590 days ago

Crane's Way is a work of incomparable imagery and ethereal perspectives. The description of the panorama under the eagle's flight path sets the tone, in quality prose, descriptive power and creativity for the remainder of the work. Accepting the advice to check out a later chapter I found 16 & 25 to maintain the earlier quality of balanced and measured storytelling. It is the major downside of this site that a work of this standard should be available but recognised by so few. BACKED. Robert Davidson. The Tuzla Run

Karen Eisenbrey wrote 591 days ago

I don't think it's a good idea to recommend checking out ch 16 or 25. I've seen that on a couple of pitches and I don't think it works. You can't be there in the bookshop whispering to the potential reader, 'Mate, check out page 99....'



Orlando,

Point taken, and thank you for making it. What I really meant was not "This is where it gets good," but rather, "If you're intrigued by the opening and want to read more but not the whole thing, here are a couple of interesting places to go." So I guess I should actually say that in the pitch (if the word count allows) and not count on mindreaders. But I am going to leave the suggestion, because really, who doesn't get tired after awhile of receiving comments only on chapter 1?

Karen

Orlando Furioso wrote 591 days ago

I don't think it's a good idea to recommend checking out ch 16 or 25. I've seen that on a couple of pitches and I don't think it works. You can't be there in the bookshop whispering to the potential reader, 'Mate, check out page 99....'

Walden Carrington wrote 596 days ago

Karen,
Crane's Way shines from the author's brilliant imagination. I love your exquisite descriptions in the prologue. The plot outlined in the synopsis has great appeal to readers of the fantasy genre. Backed with pleasure.

A. Zoomer wrote 602 days ago

CRANE'S WAY

Your words soar off the page. Well done!
I would love to see this book published and read widely.
A Zoomer

MickR wrote 604 days ago

Karen,
Although beautifully illustrated, I have to say that the opening in the prologue had my attention drifting. If this is normal for the genre the disregard this comment.
I am not a fan of opening with dialogue but I thought the sentence “Mama? Where does the sun go when the sun goes down, Mama?” would make a cute opening that would make me want to read on to find out more about this inquisitive child. There is a POV confusion for me at times. Is it Crane’s or is it Mama’s? It isn’t too distracting but maybe it is something you could look into.
You have a flair for imagery but I found it didn’t consistently hold my attention. This is not the fault of your story but my reading preference.
MickR – The Nightcrawler

Marcus Fisch wrote 618 days ago

Beautifully written and totally captivating. After four chapters I was about to back this novel and resaw the 'blurb' check out chapter 25 - so I did. An hour later I have managed to tear myself away but will continue tomorrow (or is that today) reading this astounding work.
I can see (want to see) the film of this.
Totally Backed
Abel Kane
The Alchemists' Cookbook

CarolinaAl wrote 620 days ago

A richly imagined, simmering fantasy. Descriptive without being wordy. Poignant emotions. Fluent narrative. Sub plot stands are nicely woven together into a strong story thread. Very accomplished writing. Backed.

name falied moderation wrote 623 days ago

Dear Karen


I have started to read your writing and must say that it is compelling. Already you have established your animated characters in my head, ( they are not leaving soon) and i feel strongly to back your book now. such talent you have to create a compelling read for me. I do wish to be part of your climb to the top on this site. CONGRATS and I will comment more as I read more

BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK also

The VERY best of luck to you

BACKED BY ME FOR SURE
Denise
The Letter

SusieGulick wrote 623 days ago

You are totally fantastic, Karen! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my memoir book? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

brinskie1 wrote 627 days ago

Crane's Way - You have the beginnings of an excellent story; the mix of fantasy with lit fiction is appealing - a device I am familiar with and use. In your next edit, you might focus on instilling more immediacy with a cut here and there. ['Forsaking the river that had led him here,' - we know the river 'led him here'. 'The sunset was pretty, blazing orange and gold' - I would delete 'was pretty' and go with 'The sunset blazed orange and gold'; let your fine description do the work. The same applys to 'The mountains were interesting' ] There is a good deal of this sort of thing scattered throughout what I have read [chaps one and two]. I also had a problem with your opening prologue sentence - what exactly does 'rejoicing in wings' mean? A little nip and tuck will turn a good beginning into an excellent read. Shelved.

G
Einstein's Road Trip [ I would be interested in seeing your take on Einstein when your time allows. Thanks. ]

Becca wrote 635 days ago

I really love the idea of combining fantasy with literary fiction. Do you know any published works that cross these genres? Anyway, onto your story here :)

Your descriptive passages are beautiful and unique. Not too complicated to relate to, but beyond the boring simplicity of cardboard cut out descriptions.

Crane is an intriguing lead character, brought to life well through both his dialogue and inner thoughts. You've done a good job filtering the story through his point of view.

It seems you've taken the time to polish this, making it an easy read and an easy decision for me to back. Good luck with this!

xBeccaX
The Forever Girl

Elijah Enyereibe Iwuji wrote 643 days ago

Karen,

Your description and setting of the scene at the beginning is gripping. Your work is well paced, and character development is also well fitted for the craft of this prose. You absolutely created an excellent character in Krane, the sleepy town of Deep River, these and many others portrayed your work a good one. No spelling or grammer error, strenght absorbed. Goodluck.

Despinas1 wrote 669 days ago

Dear Karen, this is a wonderful, fresh fantasy novel, with characters so alive that one must indulge in their world to discover their secrets. You're writing skills are excellent, I'm amazed at the pristine quality of your work. I've not read more than the first chapter, but time permitting I will definitely return.
A very deserved backing, and best of luck. I can see this a novelty piece a huge success with children and adults alike.
Sincerely
Helen
The Last Dream

Thetinman wrote 674 days ago

Karen,
I like this. Your descriptions set the scene, and reading the beginning felt like I was about to embark on a saga, a story I could sink my teeth into. I got the same feeling with other good fantasies I’ve read – I’m immediately put into the mood right from the start.
What I particularly like:
You don’t start off with magical props and unknown words that belong to the author’s world. Amateurish fantasy is full of that, and we’re immediately told of the empress sorceress wielding the fantastical stone of azubia or some other crap. Any writing that starts with the unbelievable is...unbelievable, and as such, worthless because the reader can’t immerse himself in the world. No so in your case. You followed the time honoured formula laid down by great fantasy and scifi authors – start with the known. Introduce the unknown slowly.
Liked your dialogue, my fav part of any book, and your descriptions, though dramatic and detailed, are not overdone or underdone. Beginners usually have very two dimensional characters and worlds. You don’t.
Loved the transition from prologue to chapter one. Looking down, a small nit- on the par starting with “Crane turned back... The All around sentence – another morning like so many others, always the same,” sounded quickly (and badly) written. It needs cleaning up and better descriptions – perhaps Crane can ‘smell’ the fresh bread being cooked by ____, or hear_____chopping kindle for the morning fire...I need to smell and seethe village waking up, not be told it’s all the same old. As you can see though, this is a minor nit and something I think you would catch on an edit.
Liked the change of POV to Jelf – your description of the surroundings reminded me of the Hobbit town in Lord of the rings, but with more detail. I love the realism.
I jumped to chapter 5 and 10, but found nothing. Interaction between Crane and Elic sounded very real, as two boyhood friends out on an adventure. I liked the magic sequence in chapter 5, as I did the dialogue.
Getting to the cover. You need a better one. I know we all hope to be picked up by a pub house which will take care of this, but most books do not, not even great ones. You uploaded in October 09. Are you already doing a search for a decent cover? It would likely help, and you would then have something for smashwords or amazon if you decide to ebook this. I hope you do, as it should be out there one way or another.
In short, I wish I had more to pick out but I don’t. This is well thought out and carefully written and edited. I’m impressed.
Backed.

Paul

www.pauldaytonscifi.com

Eye of the Idol

ikraft wrote 678 days ago

Your description of the environment/setting at the beginning was excellent and did a very good job of situating the story in your context. You describe things very well and I think that you will be very successful amongst the people who would read books of this genre. I like the blending of fantasy with emotions - very well done!

Best Wishes,
Ian Kraft
(The Freel of Streel)(you may like my book - it is literary fantasy too)

ikraft wrote 678 days ago

Your description of the environment/setting at the beginning was excellent and did a very good job of situating the story in your context. You describe things very well and I think that you will be very successful amongst the people who would read books of this genre. I like the blending of fantasy with emotions - very well done!

Best Wishes,
Ian Kraft
(The Freel of Streel)(you may like my book - it is literary fantasy too)

lynn clayton wrote 687 days ago

The inn, the blacksmith, the eagle soaring, it's all so beautiful and apparently about real people. They speak as we do, they feel as we do, in Jelph's case grow old as we do, and I for one want to read about these ordinary people. The extraordinary situations are fine. This to me is the secret of well-written fantasy.
Your prose is magical. Backed. Lynn

DP Walker wrote 688 days ago

Hi Karen
I love the way you portray the sleepy town of Deep River with your vivid descriptions and smoothly flowing dialogue. Crane is a great character, full of curiousity and intrigue. Great stuff.
DP Walker
Five Dares

Daniel Manning wrote 691 days ago

By introducing a bewildered young adolescent who doesn't know who is father is, an intriguing mystery begins to unfold. What happened at the Tavern to make a sick man well, and a young girl pregnant. The stranger vanished from his room without trace, did he just fly away. why is the adolescent named Crane, the name of a bird, who is his father. Why do the people in the village fear the mad wizard named Yrae and his lust for young
Girls.
Cranes Way more than compenates for the slow build up approach of the early chapters, there is no flurry of magical spells, we see a troubled teenager struggling to come to terms with who he is.
Backed with Pleasure
Daniel Manning
No Compatibility.

Marcus Fisch wrote 692 days ago

Excellent story. Should go all the way.
Backed with pleasure
Abel Kane
The Alchemists' Cookbook

CraigD wrote 707 days ago

I like the voice you've given this; it doesn't seem at all like a typical wizard-fantasy to me, at least not at the beginning. The time and place are different, and the characters are understated and interesting. The writing supports it well; I didn't see any technical weaknesses. Happy to back it for you.
Craig
The Job

M. A. McRae. wrote 709 days ago

Good writing, a good story, and interesting characters. Not even any errors of spelling or grammar to mention. I wanted to read it all. Backed without question. Marj.

Owen Quinn wrote 715 days ago

Creepy village, isolated kid with powers and a life that isn't all it seems, coming of age arc and a nasty villain, mix togehter and you get a compelling read for young and old alike.

Andrew Burans wrote 722 days ago

You have created a memorable character in Crane. Your work is well paced, your character development is excellent and this coupled with your descriptive writing style makes your finely crafted fantasy a most enjoyable read. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

S Richard Betterton wrote 723 days ago

Really enjoyed reading this. You have a lovely way with words. Not overwritten, just words chosen and strung together that made me nod in appreciation - the last I read being 'a room filed with dust and history.'

SusieGulick wrote 725 days ago

Dear Karen, I love fantasy & happily ever - maybe that's in sight. :) Before I began to read your book, I was prepared by your recap/pitch,which was very well done. :) Your story is good because you create interest by having short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm "backing" your book: When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved...authonomy. :) Please "back" my TWO memoir books, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" & my completed memoir unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories," which tells at the end, my illness now & 6th abusive marriage." Thanks, Susie :)
p.s. Remember: Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs. :)

carlashmore wrote 731 days ago

I think this has one of the great YA/fantasy premises on Authonomy. I can see is a blockbuster novel for the young adult reader. It’s got the characters (Crane, in particular - such a decent, kind, noble yet complex soul), the setting (loved the village)- everything to engage your target audience. Your voice is clear and distinctive and I found nothing to nitpick in the chapters I read.
Backed with pleasure
Carl
The Time Hunters

hkraak wrote 739 days ago

CRANE'S Way: Your descriptions are beautiful and draw the reader into the story. Crane is a great MC as well. Can't wait to see where this goes!

Heidi
Pearl Edda

crazy mama wrote 743 days ago

This is really well written with a captivating story line. Backed

cat5149 wrote 745 days ago

A beautifully written book with some of the best description I've read on Authonomy. Shelved, with pleasure.

Carol

Micheal O'Durcain wrote 746 days ago

This is so gently and beautifully written that I was drawn into it from page one.
everything about the way you tell it attracts the reader.
It is clear, simple, the characters role is shown by actions.
the villagers reaction to crane, his own extraordinary kindness to his mother, the Keeper and the records.
All is pleasurable.
I must back this.
Congratulations on giving so much enjoyment to your readers
I wish you the very best of luck.
Micheal O'Durcain
Murder on the Menu

writingwildly wrote 750 days ago

Fascinating - beautiful flow to your writing. You are a natural storyteller. Not overdone, either, which is quite often the case in stories like this.
backed
Genevieve

carlashmore wrote 752 days ago

Well, can I just say the opening line to Chapter 16 - 'Always friendly, never friends' is one of those great lines that could open a great novel. And you just have it as a chapter opening. Anyway, it certainly summed up Eslo's wonderful character. I ended up reading from 16 - 18 and kind've wished I had started at the beginning as I was slightly lost. Still, I thought this was magnificently written and literally brimming with imagination. Fantastic
Carl
The Time Hunters

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