Book Jacket

 

rank 5458
word count 70950
date submitted 29.12.2009
date updated 07.01.2010
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Thriller...
classification: moderate
complete

Petroleum

Mike Wendling

A tense literary thriller about a frustrated young journalist on the trail of an oil industry conspiracy.

 

Dave Kotzner is a jaded twenty-something business magazine hack with an unhealthy lifestyle and a moribund love life — but everything changes after he gets a cryptic tip-off from an oil company executive.

He’s skeptical – he’s heard too much corporate hype in his dead-end job, and his boss would rather he spend time pleasing advertisers than chasing stories. But when his source goes missing and he is stonewalled by the company, Dave knows he’s on to something.

Dave’s pursuit leads him around the world — from New Orleans to London, Berlin to Tokyo. He meets and clumsily woos a glamorous but unnecessarily difficult Englishwoman, loses his job, ruins his credit rating and drinks too much for his own good. Eventually he uncovers — or thinks he uncovers — a conspiracy to hide a technology that would transform the world. The ending is surprising and uplifting, and as a bonus, includes a car chase.

 
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tags

conspiracy, contemporary, journalist, london, new orleans, new york, oil, texas, thriller, tokyo

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20 comments

 

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Katy wrote 642 days ago

Mike - Did you write a short story about the subprime mortgage crisis and submit it to Litro? If so, please could you email me ASAP at editor@litro.co.uk because the damn email system has lost your original message and I need your 50-word author biography, as I'd like to publish it in the forthcoming issue. Apologies for the unconventional means of contact ... Katy Darby, Editor, Litro.

JACK DEENEY wrote 760 days ago

Mike:

I backed PETROLEUM for several reasons. I was drawn to it initially because its subject, oil, is of great interest to me. I read the first few chapters and was impressed - the pace, the character development, the tone of the piece. It reminded me a bit of Steve Shagan's THE FORMULA which eventually was made into a movie with George C. Scott, Marlon Brando and Alan North.

Two observations. To the extent that the hydrocarbon age has been evolving at a frantic pace over the last century and a half, I kept looking for something which would give me a precise time/date frame of reference (something I always look for). On the other hand, I did not skip to the last few chapters to see how it ended as I was concerned that I might come across a car chase (something I never look for).

Regards and good luck with the book.

Jack Deeney

Bob Steele wrote 824 days ago

As soon as I saw your tags and pitch for Petroleum I made myself comfortable and looked forward to the read - this is my kind of book. I liked C1 which opens up questions and leaves them tantalisingly unanswered, compounded in C2 when the phone call from Herb leaves yet more questions. Dave meanwhile is suffering the tedium of his poorly paid job and engaging my sympathy. I liked the contrast between Herb and Dave as the tension builds, and I had no choice but to keep turning the pages to see what happens next - just what this genre requires.My only niggle is that some of your sentences are too long and complex, but this is minor polishing. I'll be happy to back this.

klouholmes wrote 859 days ago

Hi Mike, The confidential voice drew me in with the search and the biggest story. I felt the voice was under 30 before that was stated. Yet it's very convincing of a journalist's and gives detail that tells his mindset. Then his pessimism about oil and the consequent pursuit of Crayson is fascinating. I thoroughly enjoy these chapters; they're amusing to read and yet full of realism about a classified subject. Good texture with narration and dialogue. Shelved - Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)


Bob Stewart wrote 860 days ago

Mike,

Stumbled across this. Thought it looked interesting. Read first three chapters. Is interesting.

It's really well written, in a very engaging downbeat, cynical way, and the pitch and the first three chapters are a really good hook. Your dialogue is very well crafted, natural and trips along at a pace.

I love the idea of International Petroleum Monthly and your portrait of the editorial team rings very true. I have a colleague who belongs in that office (or who came from it). 'high technical (i.e. over my head)' - I imagine this is the unpoken thought of every journalist.

Quirky and unusual. Will return for definite.

Cheers
Rob

Raymond Nickford wrote 866 days ago

You get straight into the meat of your story with a fast paced and intriguing first chapter and, as a Brit, I was interested to find myself in your settting of Brooklyn, as Dave searches for his apartment in the second Chapter.
Continuation with short chapters, as much as the unfolding storyline, maintain tension while a
wry sense of humour gives this thriller a clear and refreshing voice.
The prose is polished and you clearly know your craft. This, combined with a solid and tense storyline as promised in your synopsis makes me want to read on. Shelved.
Ray
(A Child from the Wishing Well)

FMKnight wrote 866 days ago

I backed this not only because of the MC's profession, but because it's clean and easy to read. Good luck.

Clare Hill wrote 866 days ago

I love Dave's voice - sarcastic and world-weary with just a slight hint of him holding out hope for a better future - but not putting much faith in it. Cracking dialogue and characterisation, I didn't spot any problems and I'd buy this to get more of Dave Kotzner - he seems like my kind of bloke. Backed.

Jillylinton wrote 866 days ago

Good beginning and commendable dialog.

Gumbanu wrote 867 days ago

Hi Mike,

Okay, I’ve read the rest of what’s up here and I it’s got me hooked. The characters are well thought out with good distinguishing traits and believable dialogue; the plot is unfolding well and promises plenty of edge of the seat twists and turns. I can picture the scenes, and can imagine it on the big screen.

With Dave’s bad luck and sardonic views I can see there being some interesting scrapes ahead and I look forward to when you post more chapters (if you decide to…).

Irritatingly my ravenous computer has devoured my notes from chapters 3 and 4, but some other thoughts here:

I agree with the comment below about the 'pre-Katrina' line.

‘Herb Crayman was having deep-seated grandeurous illusions.’ I think I would challenge the word ‘grandeurous’ in scrabble (though I am open to having the challenge rebuffed).

Nice dialogue exchange with the elusive Tangent reps.

‘I was a bit wary about potential for someone in the office (i.e. Dougherty) to snoop around in my stuff before…’ might be better to cut it to ‘I suspected Dougherty would be snooping through my stuff,’ or something similar.

Professor Crushworthy: great name! Another believable character too. Like his description as a big person with ‘a thick neck and a small head’.

‘…and he was a godsend for a journalist who wasn’t exactly an expert in the area in which he was supposed to be an expert in;’ this sentence is a bit cumbersome and could do with sharpening up.

End of chapter five where he can see the report but not get to it ups the tension well.

Funny section about the ‘test results’.

Great cutting line: ‘His smell, unfortunately, lingered.’

The news of Crushworthy’s death blasted the conspiracy into life, and showed the magnitude of what Dave is up against.

Nice hook to end the chapter on.

Best wishes,
Dave

soutexmex wrote 867 days ago

SHELVED!

JC
The Obergemau Key

paxie wrote 867 days ago

Mike
Your short and long pitch are almost identical....I;d change one.....Your pitch is your shop window....

Chapter One was a great opener, racy and intriguing, a good hook, but I was missing a time and place.....When I started Chapter Two I wondered how far back in time I'd gone.....We find out half way down the page that he lives in Brooklyn, but we dont know where the apartment was that he was searching so desperately.....

The office was a mess......fell flat....You could craft a chaotic nerve centre atmosphere, with phones ringing, people jack-knifing between desk, coffee spilling and his boss yelling......Most thriller films open to chaos...(you see I've already got you up there on the big screen)...

Check out the words in brackets....I skimmed them, couldn't see the need for them to be there...

company (that) we never paid on time..
photocopied (that) I was certain
I (had) managed to do at least one production
I (had) dug up a phone number

Thriller writers are under pressure to keep the pace, I admit, I couldn't do it myself...I talk a load of rubbish....If you have a habit of slotting in 'redundant words' the reader gets tired of seeing them..

When you mention New Orleans, the word 'least' comes up twice in 2 lines, sounded repetitive to me....

A fabulous read, and a well polished piece...Intriguing premise........I flipped ahead to chapter 6 and could see plot development was stream rolling nicely..

Best of luck with this...

Shelved with pleasure...

CamilleS wrote 868 days ago

Polished, well written, and great voice. Looking forward to reading more!. Backing with pleasure.

Camille
Curse of the Golden Fly (a YA fantasy - take a peek!)

wendling wrote 869 days ago

Cheers Dave. Helpful comments. Still trying to figure this site out. see you soon mate. watch out for women with toothpicks.

wendling wrote 872 days ago

thanks everyone for the comments and backing and all. I will repay asap, but have just spent the last few days in a bit of a fog. happy new year.

Gumbanu wrote 872 days ago

Hi Mike,

I have no expertise in literary criticism, so please feel free to ignore what follows.

I have just read the first two chapters, but the hangover that presents itself to me on this day every year is taking its toll and I will have to return for more when my head stops throbbing. To top it all, my girlfriend has just decided it is a good idea to burst 22 balloons with a toothpick. Ouch.

Okay, from what I’ve read thus far, I like the writing style and the characters are believable and well constructed, especially Dave, but also those who are only mentioned in passing like the lady in the bodega who is too life-weary to smile.

I got the feeling of someone about to get into something deeper than would be comfortable and had the urge to read on (after some Ibuprofen though…).

Obviously I will add more when I’ve read a bit more, but there are few minor points.

Chapter 1

‘I’ve checked out the broken plumbing…’ would read better without the ‘out’.

‘…suspiciously stripped place…’ perhaps you don't want to reveal what the building is at this stage for plot reasons, but for me the word ‘place’ could be replaced with a more informative word to give the reader a better sense of location: townhouse, mansion, warehouse, or whatever.

‘…feeling panicked, feeling a rising dread …’ the repetition of ‘feeling’ rubs me the wrong way; consider ‘…feeling panicked, a rising dread forming in my …’

I liked the repetition of the opening line, like a resigned sigh.

Chapter 2

‘…there was no resurgence,’ gave an immediate insight into how the magazine works without having to spell it out, which I liked.

‘...how much oil will be found and dug up …’ perhaps ‘dug up’ would be better replaced by ‘extracted’ – seems more a term they would use.

Nice line about the gamma rays.

‘You mean the IPM?’ don’t think the underline is necessary, might just be a formatting thing.

‘…let’s just say they’ll be more exciting announcements…’ should ‘they’ll’ be replaced by ‘there’ll’?

‘I’ll be at there,’ typo?

The Oil Expo is ‘next month’ but the patent is due to come through ‘in the next three days or so’; as such, if the patent is granted, why would Herb want to wait a month before getting the thing public?

The encounter in the bodega made me chortle.

Nice line about the boom and bust.

‘… moneymaking schemes on the go at once.’ I would suggest ditching ‘at once’.

‘This was my life at the moment.’ I’d be tempting to stop at ‘This was my life.’ I think it packs a better punch.

I’ll be back to read more later; in the meantime: backed.

Best wishes,
Dave

Andrew W. wrote 874 days ago

Petroleum

Hi Mike,

This is wonderfully written, so well edited, accessible and so laconic is the wit that we could probably cut ourselves on it if we are not careful. You are a very clever writer, comedy is perhaps the hardest thing to write and you have done a marvellous job here. The short chapters help and you unfold the predicament around us remarkably quickly and very skillfully, very happy to back your book, best wishes and good luck

Andrew W
(Sanctuary's Loss)

Pam wrote 875 days ago

The pitch works.. the title probably does... either way it certainly got my attention. Will be back for more. pam

Suzannah Burke wrote 875 days ago

Backed with pleasure.

This is fast paced and the wry humor caught me straight off. You have a terrific voice and an interesting style that flows very well indeed.

Happy to shelve it.

Suzannah Burke
Dudes Down Under

Jim Darcy wrote 875 days ago

Caught on the hook by your title and the pitch - so they work! You have an easy-to-read style which works well. The narrator working for a magazine like IPM made me laugh - I get such mags sent to me and they are a hoot! Plenty of mileage in this (ha ha). Happy to back, Jim D Serpent's Blood

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