Don't Shine into My Speaker!

Alena

This is the only book on Authonomy that I have read all the way through. It is so immensely touching and it made me cry. I marvel at your wisdom and courage and patience. Thank you for writing it. Backed, of course.

Nicole
Chosen

Now that I have wept through your entire book, I must agree that it should be published. I'll comment again later after I have composed myself. MD Eyler BACKED

Absolutely riveting, superbly written - you put us all to shame. Honesty in its most profound, heartfelt form. Please tell me you are seeing to getting this magnificent piece of work published for it is a true gem. I can't rave enough! I simply cannot fault this manuscript!

this is the first thing I've read all the way through on Authonomy. The author had a period of guilt, of feeling like she didn't love, and yet, she was there. She stayed. No matter the emotions around it, she proved how much the child matters. I was also impressed by the child's siblings. They were beautiful. I'm not sure that I could do it, myself, but I'm grateful that parents like you exist in the world. Thank you for sharing, and may God Bless you mightily. I'll be praying for you today.

Very touching story, the kind of story that I would buy and give to friends and family
You have a gift, when it comes to connecting with the reader and building compassion for the MC
The writing is good and the dialogue impressive
I wish the you best
Scott
The Esrevinu Chronicles/Secrets of the Elephant Rocks

This book speaks to me on many levels. I'm the single mother of a 20 year old son who has Down syndrome (my biological son who's featured in my book.) I also was a foster mother for 2.5 years, and went through the heartbreaking process of trying to adopt a little boy I'd had since he was 3 months old. It was between me and his maternal grandparents. They were granted the adoption.

I had 18 children during those short years. My youngest was 5 hours old. My oldest was 17 years old when she came to me. Would I do it again? No. I don't know how I had the energy then to do it. (I've always been a single mother and was at the time I fostered children.) Am I glad I did it? Yes, and I'm grateful that I DID have the energy back then to do what I did for those children.

Thanks for your book. Backed and starred.

Kim
Crystal Clean

This story is somewhat confusing. Each new chapter is completely different than the rest. Is that the way it's meant to be? I do like each chapter, but they don't flow. I'm not even sure how to review it, so I'll just review it by the chapters. Each one presents heartfelt memories and stories, and each are written very professionally, and seem to come from the heart. Perhaps if I understood what the book was really about, I could better review it! For now, I enjoyed each chapter, but if you could find someway of making them flow better, it could turn out to be a great book!

I read the first seven chapters feeling like I could be writing the same story. Only mine was my own birth daughter who was born with autism. This book is so needed as Christian parents grind themselves into the ground over not being "good enough" at this. So many times there is no book and we are left to learn as we go. We heard many, there just aren't many kids just like B. She isn't mentally handicapped, she doesnt fit perfectly into autism or any other diagnoses. But we had difficulties. Hours of tantrums and screaming, holding her in my lap so she wouldn't hurt herself. We know what depression and frustration and pain is all about. We know the very real thoughts that flash through our minds of not liking our children. Thank you so much for being willing to write out all your very personal family life. I know this book would touch many parents. I will add it to my watchlist because it is so needed. If the Christian publishers don't pick this one up it is a shame to them!

Nathalie

It seems terrible that you were not given the appropriate information and guidance when you had offered to take this child. You write very well and clearly. This should be a text for wouldbe foster parents. Perhaps it is. Backed
Lara
Good for Him

Very emotional and quite captivating. You are passionate and it shows in your fine writing.

Backed with pleasure.

Richard

What a tribute to adoption and to love.I read through the first chapter and its a book hard to put down. I will get back to it shortly. Could you look at You=Turn? thanks, Lynne

Very powerful for those who want their heart-strings tugged...I just want to be entertained but good luck to you anyway!
Stewart

What a beautiful story!
Backed, with many tears.
Sharon Van Orman
Eve, an Eden's Exiles novel

A very touching and moving story.

Dawn
Sammy and the Wise Willow

Hi Alena, I have read and backed your book. It has been a long time since I have read a truly touching well written story. And by this I mean I have to confess, I am getting a little bit sick of big plot and end of the world story....I am all for fantasy, but I was looking for something profound and real, something that would change me as a reader. I enjoyed your book tremendously. On my list. Good luck with everything, M

This story meant a great deal to me, as my grandson Thomas is a special child. I dedicated my book, Thomas Fairchild to him, and others like him. I once saw a documentary on the forgotten children in Russia, naked, freezing, alone and starving, while laying amongst their own excrement. I cried for days, so deeply moved by their circumstances. God bless you dear one, for your wonderful work. You will indeed earn your angel wings.
Here in New Zealand, my family are closely involved with these special children. They teach us so much and are indeed precious souls. I am delighted to back your wonderful book. Eunice.

I was crying before i'd even finished the introduction. This is stunning. How true that 'Nothing worthy of something is free. And what is free is worthy of nothing.' It reminds me of David who said 'I will not offer up to the Lord that which has cost me nothing.' The book is awesome. You have an amazing way of expressing the emotions in words. Backed.

Hello Alena.
I want to repete the comment below that said that it was a pleasureto read this book the whole way through!
Having a ''developmentally disabled child' in a family is world changing - yes good [for those special moments] and bad [all those lost hopes]. My sister has a younf son, who we all help look after. My children love him to bits. But it is hard. I understood your book completely. BACKED.
If you write to some of the British charities, they my sponsor you to ge the book published widely.

I want to bring some happiness to children through my Paperbats' books. I wondered weather I could at the same time tempt you to read some of my childrens' book 'Adventures of the Paper Bats'.

They want to say ''Hello, we are small plump furry animals, living in local parks, which we protect . Our books are adventures for 5-8 year olds. I hope you enjoy our adventures''. ''Especially mine'', says baby Sunny.
Backed then or kill them off; your choice !
Jerry [paperbat]

Hi Alena,

I don't usually read non-fiction unless I have to, but I wish I had time to read more of this. I will definitely read more when I eventually do have some time but things are hectic at present. As I spent most of my working life as a children's social worker, though not of course in your country, I also had a kind of professional interest in this story

I like the short chapters which makes for much easier reading, but I'm not so sure about the short sentences close together. This is, of course, a style issue and is your choice, but I would consider changing some of thos short sentences into longer ones or even putting them into paragraphs.

In the section I've had time to read I only spotted one typographical error and that as just a missing 'a'.

Ron

Alena

This is the only book on Authonomy that I have read all the way through. It is so immensely touching and it made me cry. I marvel at your wisdom and courage and patience. Thank you for writing it. Backed, of course.

Nicole
Chosen

Dear Alena
this book cover is captivating, what an adorable face, and such a light fir sure. I started reading this some time ago and found it open, honest and full of heart. You have given me and other readers a window through which we can experience, and I say experience as you write so well, this truth and the life, ( i dont want to say story)
I have not read all your book yet.... but will comment more when I have......., I wish to get this backing in so that i can assist you in climbing to the top. so
BACKED BY ME FOR SURE
if you could find the time to go through and 'comment', on my work, I would be so happy, as this will enable me to improve as a writer, and if you wish BACK it
Again the VERY BEST OF LUCK with your book

Denise

Your true life story will need to be honored.
Backed

What honesrty. You took a child into your home but it took time to take her into your heart.Deni can only thrive in such a caring environment . You are incredible people. Shelved, Anne

Hi Alena,

This book is such a touching tribute to your adopted child.
You and your husband opened your home and yourselves to experiencing a completely new reality. Of course you had apprehensions, but you were willing to try and I think that 's half the battle of acceptance.
Backed.

Cynthia
Sharing Short Stories

A beautiful story, told laconically and poetically. Although I'm not religious, as the father of two young children, I can identify with the absorbtion in the child's world, which looks so different for the parent, but where the magic shines through. Behind the tragedy, your love captures the magic.

I don’t even know where to begin. I guess first, my criticism… I have nothing. If anything, I wish it was longer. My praise… everything! What a passionate and heartfelt story. I have to echo what many others have said: “This should be published.” At the very least, it deserves a much higher rank.
Backed.
Gregory James

Your honesty and sincerity pulls the reader in from the very beginning. You have a great, compelling voice which communicates beautifully. No-one could remain dry-eyed while reading this. I do hope it achieves the success it deserves.
Shelved, of course.
Anna (Black Damask)

I wish you well in your endeavors to bring the situation of institutionalized children in the Czech Republic to the attention of the world. Your historical perspective, posted toward the end of your narrative, is illuminating.

More personally, your experience of bringing a severely developmentally challenged child into your busy home, and trying to both help her to thrive and adjust yourself and your family to her needs without losing yourselves in the process is remarkable.

I wish you all the best with the publication of this tremendously honest book, which, stylistically works very well, in addition to being a poignant story that I am sure many, many people will be able to identify with.

Also, I wish you and your family well, personally. You have embarked upon a very interesting journey.

And I specifically wish Deni well - if the world were run by mentally retarded people - raised with the love, insight, and patience of people like you - there would be no wars.

An aside - you may feel at times that you don't have love, or patience, but the actions you take outweigh the frustration you feel in determining the outcome. Regardless of your sleepless nights, that child feels she is loved. Imagine where she would be now if she had been left in that institution - turned in on herself, unable to eat and swallow (never knowing the joy she feels in eating foods she loves), atrophied muscles, unable to walk, probably unable to talk, without the pleasure she feels in music and the sense of family and community that you have given to her. Your gift to her is not measurable. Her gift to you is the same.

With warm regards,
Judy

All I can say is that this really is the kind of thing that Harper True should be putting in book shops.

This is quite different - not just because the translation occasionally slips up, giving a certain feel to the text. At times it reads almost like a diary, and it is difficult to determine what the story precisely is. Whilst the book is brimful of emotion, really well-expressed, and it is a privilege to share your experience, I'd suggest the purpose perhaps needs to be clearer? Unquestionably backed, however.

I'm only up to ch 5 but this is a book that I'll want to return to. The writing comes from the heart but never slips into sentimentality. I'm sure it has the potential to affect its readers deeply. Backed. Jackie (Gift of Sparrows)

Hi Alena ...

I have read most of what you have posted. I am now wondering if your husband is Czechoslovakian also ... ( I apologise for my spelling). You have written a spell binding book and if English is not your husband's first language, he has done an unbelievable task of translation.

Are there mistakes, yes ... but many an English student would also make the same mistakes, but I somehow think the mistakes make your story more endearing. You have written with truth and honesty and I think it shows you to be a person of great integrity.

I feel the way it is written shows the deeper feelings that lurk behind your writing and the intention of your story, I feel, would fail if it was grammatically correct. I have 'backed', on a story that deserves to be told, for it shows what only a mother can know. As men, we can only stand at the sidelines and wonder. 'Backed'. All the Best. Regards ... Duncan.

Touching and poetic, with universal truths and universal aches and universal hopes. I love your writing. Everything worked for me, the pace, the details you choose, the short chapters. This is a truly wonderful work and probably important social commentary as well. I have nothing but encouragement and best wishes for you!
---Mary
The Qualities of Wood

Though this is a moving tale I'm not sure if it has a commercial value. It cetainly has a emotional one that would touch almost anyones heart strings. Being a short also doesn't help its saleability, though in a collection of similar stories this may change or if you were to extend it in some way. Best of luck with it though.

Dear Alena,

Don't Shine into My Speaker, is a riveting and heart breaking story. How brave of you to share this with the world. I only had time to read part of it but the honesty of the authors life rips at my heart. I hope this book becomes a best seller and helps others who face challenges. God is with you.

backed
Pamela Frost
aka scatteredfrost
Houses of Cards

Alena, I've looked at your Introduction and first three chapters. This is a professional piece of work. Thanks for sharing your experience.

Happy to back this.

Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

From the heart, this is riveting. Special people do special things and still think they aren't special. It doesn't matter how many times you relate this, they will never agree with you. It takes the will of iron and the conscience of angels to give oneself as you have.

backed with pleasure
all the best
sue

This is a really strong and engaging story, I just had to read more and more of it. Great writing.

Backed.
K

you have taken much time and effort with this...it obviously means something to you...written with care and skill...
su dan [reasd 'SEASONS]

Fantastically emotional read.
Happily backed
Mal Muirhead

Thank you for exposing yourself and your dear sweet child to our scrutiny. Thnak you for going through this misery for us. Perhaps we too grew a little with you. You have made the experience rranslucent, like poetry, shimmering before us with a ghostly reality.
The dog's poop has been trasnmuted into manna.

The translation is rough and gritty in spots, but it has its own meter and melody, distorting syntax as poetry often does to bring out the metaphor of truth. It forces us to see through the curtain of words to the real happenings of your life.

May this work bring you great success, not for you necessarily, but so that many many more will be attracted to share your experience and perhaps provide more manna for Hannah.

The value in return reads is that you are often introduced to books you probably would not have sought out on your own. The clear and personal tone, the reasoned emotion with which you write made this an experience. Thank you.
Jim Coplin
Bite Mark & Troll Tales

Your writing is completely open and honest. It sounds like you're writing every single thought and opinion without excluding any of the details. Makes the story much more believable. It sounds like a difficult time in your life but definitely something that is worthwhile to tell and read.

Sean

I am forever amazed at the power of the written word. It opens doors to our past, to our hearts and to our souls.
I don't think we ever get over traumatic experiences, but we do learn to connect with others. It is in the act of reaching out to others that enables us to heal and give comfort. That is how it is meant to be and that is what this book conveys to the reader. MD Eyler

Alena,

Congratulations on a work that could be required reading not only for the general reader but for all engaged in the field of caring for children like Denisa. I have no doubts about your revealing and informative book eventually securing a publisher. Watchlisted, Shelved, Backed and Commented upon.

Chapter 14 para 3 - I suggest change to: I subconsciously reserved a budget of strength and patience for Denisa and it was overdrawn by her on numerous ocassions.

Tony Brady. - SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE - Books 1,2 & 3.

I agree with all of the positive comments. A beautiful book. Thank you for writing Don't Shine in my Speaker.

Don't Shine Into My Mirror is a very honest book to read.
The story made me stop and think and I felt myself getting drawn in.
The writing is beautiful and you certainly know how to tell a story.
Very well done indeed.

Now that I have wept through your entire book, I must agree that it should be published. I'll comment again later after I have composed myself. MD Eyler BACKED

Alena
This is a courageous and poignant tale of overcoming adversity - I've only read a few chapters so far and could have easily gone on to read more.
Backed
Kate (Little Guide to Unhip)

Absolutely riveting, superbly written - you put us all to shame. Honesty in its most profound, heartfelt form. Please tell me you are seeing to getting this magnificent piece of work published for it is a true gem. I can't rave enough! I simply cannot fault this manuscript!

Alena, I am moved by your strength to write this story - powerful and soul stirring. As an adopted child and mother of an autistic child - i could empathise with you absolutely. Welldone.
Paula - Ruined Echoes - shelved these last few days hope you might look at mine?

Hi Alena,

This is absolutely amazing. This is an eye-opener for those of us parents who have been fortunate enough to have all healthy children. I could never have imaged your pain, that is, until I read your book. Your writing is enlightening and heartwarming, and I think you for sharing your emotions. Good Luck and Best Wishes.

Backed 100%

Patrick Armstead
Dark Lands

I know many of the challenges raising developementally disabled children (have worked with them many years). Thank you for writing this book.

This could be an incredible book. A moving account of an unspeakable taboo. Not bonding with a child must be every parent's worst nightmare and if this could be an invaluable insight into that reality.

However, sadly the narrative lets this down. I don't know if this is the author's own story or that of someone else, but I would love to see her really develop the story and delve deep into the mother's feelings. As a concept, it has the hallmark of a bestseller. In its current form it doesn't take you close enough to the characters or events. I understand it's translated from Czech into English, but even forgiving the flaws in the adaptation, there is not enough detail or emotion here.

I do not mean to be discouraging. I would urge you to start again at the beginning and map out the story, describing in detail each episode and the mother's emotions. Would a diary form help? Embellishing the story would also bring it closer to the 80,000 plus words needed for a full-length book.

Good luck.

Hi Alena,
What to say? Superb will suffice.
Backed and shelved with best wishes, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys