Book Jacket

 

rank 5466
word count 13298
date submitted 22.02.2010
date updated 22.09.2010
genres: Fiction, Fantasy, Children's, Young...
classification: universal
complete

Traveling Trunk Adventure #1: Pirate Treasure

Benjamin Flinders

View YouTube Book Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tm_YV6W7S8o

A cursed treasure chest, swashbuckling pirates, time-traveling brothers, mistaken identities, disgusting food, dark secrets...a non-stop-fun juvenile fiction.

 

See my NEW movie book trailer on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tm_YV6W7S8o

A cursed treasure chest transports Ethan and Dallin back in time and onto a ship in the New World. Not just any ship, a merchant vessel transformed into a renegade pirate ship that same morning. Mistaken as thieves, the brothers must use their wits and humor to navigate the dark secrets of the brig, survive walking the plank, learn how to talk, fight and hurl insults like a pirate (along with the rest of the clueless crew), and solve the mystery that turned Captain Black Bart into a wannabe pirate. But even if they can save the pirates from themselves, can they unravel the curse that brought them here, and then figure out how to get back home?

The Traveling Trunk Adventure series provides more humor, adventure, peril, and moral nourishment than comparable chapter books. With themes of friendship, the importance of family, trust, and not judging other people, each book subtly teaches timeless values. Throw into the mix a little historical fiction, as well as an educational component at the end, and readers have a balanced and nutritious reading experience. Reluctant readers will thirst for more.

 
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tags

adventure, boys, children's books, family values, fighting, fun, funny, gold, good moral, history, humorous, jolly roger, magic, new world, ocean, pir...

on 16 watchlists

73 comments

 

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Vanessa Darnleigh wrote 609 days ago

Old favourite indeed...it's been 'done' so often in recent years (including Hollywood blockbusters), one wonders whether there is anything original left to be written! 'Time-bandits' springs to mind...worth a go anyway.
Best wishes
Stewart

Eunice Attwood wrote 609 days ago

What a great twist on an old favourite. A hearty pirate story involving time travel. You have done a marvellous job here, and the cover is delightful. It is bound to keep the young'ns amused for many a long hour. Colourful characters who keep the story moving along at a nice pace. Backed with delight. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

Butler's Girl wrote 612 days ago

Only nit........... bosun should be bos'un and delete a few adverbs.
Other than that i think this is a great read for little ones!
Alison Butler

ccb1 wrote 613 days ago

Backed Traveling Trunk Adventure #1: Pirate Treasure."Awesome!" is the only word I have to describe the movie trailer. Childern will love the book. Pirates, dark secrets, and adventure are the components of a great fantasy for young readers.
CC Brown
Dark Side

Andrew Burans wrote 614 days ago

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created most memorable main characters in Ethan and Dallin. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing ensures that your work will appeal to the youth audience. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Wilma1 wrote 615 days ago

Travelin Trunk Adventures
Oh this is lovely a happy family with lots of mystical things going on the old chest that their father brings home gives them lots to make up stories and imaginings from. This is in the Peter Pan league. I really enjoyed the first three chapters

Regards Wilma1
Knowing Liam Riley – I hope you enjoy it.

name falied moderation wrote 627 days ago

Dear Benjamin

I have started to read your writing and must say that it is compelling. Already you have established your animated characters in my head, ( they are not leaving soon) and i feel strongly to back your book now. Very orginal storyline and very well crafted , loved it loved it. I do wish to be part of your climb to the top on this site. CONGRATS and I will comment more as I read more

BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK also

The VERY best of luck to you

Denise
The Letter

name falied moderation wrote 627 days ago

Dear Benjamin

I have your book and some others on my WL at present. just started readin and will comment in little while

Denise
The Letter

jahek wrote 627 days ago

This is a great story for your target age group - well-written and really easy to engage with.

Jane Holyoake (The Spiral Pendant)

SusieGulick wrote 627 days ago

Dear Benjamin, I love your delightful adventures in your travelling trunk series. :) Are there going to be more? :) Your pitch drew me in & your tight dialogue & paragraphs made me keep reading. :) I've backed your book. :) Could you please take a moment to back mine? :) Thanks so very much. :) Love, Susie :)

Barry Wenlock wrote 634 days ago

Hi Benjamin - a most enjoyable tale. I laughed aloud.
best wishes, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

Barry Wenlock wrote 634 days ago

Hi Benjamin - a most enjoyable tale. I laughed aloud.
best wishes, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

Barry Wenlock wrote 634 days ago

Hi Benjamin - a most enjoyable tale. I laughed aloud.
best wishes, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

Elina Lear wrote 713 days ago

I loved this. I really wanted to be a kid again so it would be acceptable for me to get an old trunk, sit in it and wait to be whisked away. The pirate dictionary was a stroke of genius and I will be subtly incorporating phrases into daily life! I can't wait for more adventures.

Famlavan wrote 775 days ago

Travelling Trunk Adventures

Forget the children this was right up my street! It has everything. Dialogue driven ideal for children (and me) very well paced with great characters. However the thing that impressed me the most was the values you built into the story. - Good luck

Burgio wrote 775 days ago

This is a good story. First, because what is better than a pirate tale? Second, because your writing style is fresh and easy to read. I think schoolagers will like this a lot. I’m adding this to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Alice Fay wrote 782 days ago

I love tales about pirates, so naturally I warmed to your book. The opening chapter was a good introduction and I look forward to reading more! You say in your pitch that your target audience is ages 5-12. Personally I think that's a little broad, since the vocabulary you can use in books for 12 years olds will be quite a lot tougher than in ones for 5 years olds, but that's only a nitpick and nothing to do with your actual story. Your cover for the book is fantastic! (As have a lot of the pirate book's covers I've seen on here). Anyway, good luck with it!

Rakhi wrote 800 days ago

I really enjoyed this and I'm sure so will my 6 year old. It has all the right ingredients to capture the curious young minds. I like your writing style, perfect for the young one's to read on their own. I also like that the chapters are not too long. The trunk is a masterful peice and kids will love the adventure it unfolds. Pirates, bunks beds, 'Tarzan' swing...so many things that will surely appeal to the kid in everyone. Backed.
Rakhi (Sir William...)

Wilma1 wrote 807 days ago

A great tale my 10 and 12 year old grandchildren would love this Excellent swashbuckling at its best

Sue Mackender
Knowing Liam Riley

ThePauleman wrote 809 days ago

I love a book that takes me there and your's does just that. it's very imaginative, funny and innocent. I could not take a break from reading it. I think kids will love this and it tells them where treasure truly lies. Great job!

scottkenny wrote 811 days ago

This is great fun, Benjamin. Perfect pacing and clever ideas make this a winner for the age range. I loved the 'beeping' watch. Yes, I'd love to have read this when I was young, but hey, I enjoy reading it now. Best wishes, Scott.

Patricia wrote 812 days ago

Quite delightful and well-done. I would have loved to read this as a ten year old.

Betty K wrote 813 days ago

Bunk beds with swinging ropes, pirates treasure chests, what kid could ask for better parents. I enjoyed reading about these kids and I'm an old lady. So any young person is just going to love the book. Definitely worth shelving which I've done for the past week.

Betty K

Ravenscar wrote 813 days ago

Benjamin,

Great start! Warm and approachable and very well paced. Backed.
Below are my comments and thoughts as I read the first two chapters.


“…cracks in the canopy of leaf-shaped blinds…” I love this imagery, but it confused me. When you said canopy, I was thinking of something up above, but then you said ‘window blinds’ and I got disoreiented.

“Unable to ignore…” “Crawling to the edge…” These types of sentences tend to be weak constructions. You’re backing into it by burying the subject. Occasionally they work, but usually they don’t. The first isn’t bad, but the second might need to be re-worked. Just a thought.

Love the Tarzan swing and the beanbag.

“The bunk beds…” Cool beds! But I wonder if this sentence wouldn’t be stronger split into two?

“Three years older…” Another of these type of sentences.

“Climbing off the bag,” I’ll stop pointing these out, but wanted to show you that they crop up a lot.

Nice. They’re excited about Dad coming home. This is warm and genuine.

“Then he checked his digital wristwatch…” Awesome detail.


Looking forward to the surprise. Nice touch. Keeps me reading.

The pirate chest really keeps my interest. Nice pacing.


Good luck with this!

Cheers,

Roberto Calas
The Beast of Maug Maurai

Greg Stewart wrote 814 days ago

Benjamin,

This is a smart children's story, a great title for a series of adventures and it is full of suitably ridiculous characters with fine witty dialogue. Highlights are the pirate rules list and the dictionary at the end. I really enjoyed reading it. The only thing I missed was a little action - as the boys were on a pirate ship I was looking for some kind of fight and/or peril for the boys - maybe with rival pirates or something similar. I wonder whether some action thread after they've been recruited would serve as the main plot and the witch/daughter storyline and their subsequent return as a subplot. I would also have built up the moment where they first come out of the trunk a little more. On a technical note chapter's 4 & 5 have different titles but are actually the same. Is there a chapter missing here? Very good work and no problem backing it.

Greg Stewart
The Devil's Fairytale

kittykat wrote 814 days ago

Love the theme and the way you jump right into the story. I particularly liked the way the boys’ room sounds like a treehouse or jungle right from the start. This pulls you in with humour and interest. I think it’s just the right length for your target audience – just one place I thought the style was a little “grown up”: the paragraph beginning “Living in a condominium complex…”. Not sure you need this as you’ve described the room so well in the book’s opening paragraphs. A very small thing in a very enjoyable read. Backed with pleasure. Kittykat (My House Eats People)

Bob Steele wrote 814 days ago

Traveling Trunk Adventure is a great children's story - Ethan and Dallin are bright, interesting characters, nd the sense of adventure is soon strong as Dad delivers the old pirate's trunk. Well written and easy reading. Backed.

Andee Hughes wrote 815 days ago

Great adventure, wonderful characters and dialogue.
Backed
Andrea. Breach of Faith

KW wrote 815 days ago

The dictionary is very cute: "Cap'n: a short Captain." "Cutlass: What pirates tell the barber if they want to keep their beards long." The story itself is cute as well. "I hope you barf on whatever Dad got you." God, a bedroom designed to look like a jungle. I wish I could have afforded to do that for my own kids when they were young. Simply, you have a lovely story here that should be very popular in the age group you are targeting. Hell, it is even popular in a much, much older age group: my own. Shelved with pleasure. I wish you the best of luck with this.

Mark Reece wrote 815 days ago

Hi, This is an adventurous, fun filled, action packed story which will be sure to capture the imaginations of theintended audience. It has all the right ingredients to be very successful. Well written with brought to life characters and places. Excellent.
BACKED
Mark
ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE

Ariom Dahl wrote 815 days ago

Good start for a kids' book. I suggest you watch out for those sentences starting with an -ing word – do be sure they say what you mean. Sometimes it's better to use straightout past tense instead. But I enjoyed the first chapter and will be back to read more.

kathrynroberts wrote 816 days ago

This is turning out to be a good book. I have only one minor thing to say about chapter one and that is that there are a couple of lines that the boys say that sound more adult-ish than kid-like. But maybe you wanted them to sound that way? Other than that, I like the premise. Backed.

Kathryn Roberts

FATE

JoelCornah wrote 816 days ago

You’ve got a neat little book here and you set the tone just right for you audience. As I was reading I made a few notes that I hope are helpful…

I’ve noticed an odd trend of books starting with light coming through a window here on Authonomy. Not sure why that is.

“Crawling to the edge of the top bunk, he grabbed the green rope hanging from the vaulted ceiling and, in Tarxan fashion, swung down.” [Cut the rest of this sentence; you’ve already established that it is a bunk bed]

Watch out for adjectives; they can clog up your descriptive prose.

“Looking at the old Grandfather clock in the dining room, Dallin smiled at the Xs, Vs and Is.
‘Eight thirty-five’ he read aloud, proud to have recently learned his Roman numerals.”

Or something like that. That way it seems less convoluted and long winded.

“First one to the top wins.”

Is one of them supposed to be saying this?

The little exchanges between the brothers are adorable. You really capture their characters nicely.

The description of the room in chapter two should really be in chapter one. Set the scene in a natural way; when the characters are there. It’s usually best to describe through action and motion, but as this is for a younger audience, you may get away with a more direct approach.

I enjoyed the little Pirate history lesson. The dialogue feels natural and well crafted.

Good description at the start of chapter three. Perhaps could do with some tactile detail? Perhaps have one of the children stroke a finger across it and then tell the reader what it felt like?

You introduce the fantasy at a fine pace; leading the reader along, deeper into the mystery. This is very important for children’s fiction, especially.

“Uh, Dallin, I don’t think we’re in Los Angeles anymore.”

As cliché as that is, I kind of like it.

The song is a fun bit. I foresee children learning it by heart.

A great cliff-hanger to chapter three (which is considerably longer than the other two – perhaps think of combining 1 and 2 together to make it seem more fluent?).

Chapter four is brilliant! There’s a lot of comedy mixed with a bit of peril. The dynamics between the crew members start off on a neat line already. I see this going far!

That’s as much as I’ve got time for right now. I hope to come back to this!

Best wishes,

- Joel Cornah

The Dinosaur Prince

flinderspress wrote 816 days ago

Thanks Peck, I'll add "Never Hang...Your Wife" (sorry, with the ellipisis your book now sounds like a murder-mystery) to my watchlist and then get it on my self as soon as I can.

Cheers,
Benjamin Flinders
(Traveling Trunk Adventures: Pirate Treasure)

C W Bigelow wrote 816 days ago

Benjamin, hard to beat a good pirate saga - and you have created one here. Backed. CW (To Save the Sun)

Melcom wrote 817 days ago

An energetic, polished read.

Ideal for your intended market.

Very happy to back this.

Melxx
Would love to hear your thoughts on Impeding Justice, currently no.48, a crime/thriller with a spunky female MC. Thanks, Melxx

lizjrnm wrote 817 days ago

I really lovethis story idea and your writing is very polished - backed!

Sandie Newman wrote 817 days ago

This is some wonderful writing. I love the opening with the bunk beds. I remember my sister and I used to sleep in some though I was never allowed the top one as she was older and probably less likely to fall out of bed. Excellent writing when the father comes home, you can feel the joy. This promises to be a brilliant story, backed.

Sandie
The Crown of Crysaldor

hot lips wrote 817 days ago

I like nice short chapters and sentences for children, and this has a very nice tone to it - the older brother looking out for the younger one. I only read two chapters but I think the scene is well set for adventure and I certainly bond with this lovely family. Very happy to back this
BADD

Vonia Jackson wrote 817 days ago

I love the world you have put me in here -- I’m a kid again, and I love it!
Your writing is impeccable, and the glossary at the end is priceless :)
Wish I could back this twice -- good job!
Voni

kerdoodle wrote 817 days ago

Your cover is fantastic, though the idea of time-traveling portals has been over-used. I put your book on my watchlist and will read it.
Ker

kerdoodle wrote 817 days ago

Your cover is fantastic, though the idea of time-traveling portals has been over-used. I put your book on my watchlist and will read it.
Ker

kerdoodle wrote 817 days ago

Your cover is fantastic, though the idea of time-traveling portals has been over-used. I put your book on my watchlist and will read it.
Ker

kerdoodle wrote 817 days ago

Your cover is fantastic, though the idea of time-traveling portals has been over-used. I put your book on my watchlist and will read it.
Ker

Niobrara Kardnova wrote 817 days ago

I love a good pirate tale, as do most all kids, and this one sure fits the bill. From the alliterative opening, to the tree bunk beds, the suitably silly poetry, the ineptly named crew aboard Cap'n Bartelmy----err----Black Bart's vessel, and the mildly uncouth glossary at the end, this is a rollicking story that gives young readers all they could ask for.
Niobrara Kardnova (The Trouble with Wives)

carlashmore wrote 818 days ago

Oh, I adore this story and your writing. It is pitch perfect for your audience and I'm such a sucker for this fantasy type world laced with contemporary tones and realism. You deserve the best of success with it. Carl. The Time Hunters

Jared wrote 818 days ago

This is an enchanting story, perfectly judged for the target readership. Funny, likeable leading characters and very well written, this is as good as it gets. Backed - absolutely!
Jared.
Mummy's Boy.

Binky Myers wrote 818 days ago

Hi Benjamin,
Oh the stuff of every child’s dreams..What a joy this book is. Captivating and wonderfully amusing.
This should have your readers thrilled and racing through the pages for more.
Backed with very my great pleasure.
Dawn : ARK

Francesco wrote 818 days ago

Exciting, well written and thoroughly enjoyable!
Backed!
A look at Sicilian Shadows would be greatly appreciated.
Frank.

Tracy McCarthy wrote 818 days ago

Loved this! I was laughing and enjoying the story and thinking, "I wish I could buy this for my boys!".
Great work. Happy to back.
Tracy
The Guardians

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