Book Jacket

 

rank 4803
word count 15046
date submitted 28.02.2010
date updated 04.05.2010
genres: Non-fiction, Travel, Harper True Li...
classification: universal
incomplete

Trekking the Pyrenees from Coast to Coast

Lee & Karen

Peaks and passes. Lakes and streams. Forests and pastures. Starlight, without glow from a streetlamp. Whispering wind with no traffic noise. Bear country!

 

The trek started gently and oh so pleasantly, like a big nature ramble. Only seven days from the coast did we encounter real mountains, presenting bigger ascents, steep and unstable terrain and challenges of navigation. Many parts of these mountains are stamped with the human footprint, and even in wilderness zones you can still find company, though you may prefer not to rub shoulders with a bear.

The BIG issue for independent trekkers is load carrying and resulting compromises. For safety's sake you might wish to carry ice axe and crampons. For comfort, you might prefer many changes of clothing, heavy duty rainwear and a bigger tent. But shoulders won't carry all that the heart desires.

Which explains why some stages found us scrabbling precariously on icy snow-slopes, while on other days we trudged along cold and wet, with threatening hypothermia. But no amount of equipment could have helped battle the demon wind which tried to blow us from Canigou's pinnacle ridge.

Danger was inescapeable but it was not our first interest. The real value of the high Pyrenees was a chance to escape the ratrace, to simply be, to experience a world apart.

 
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tags

adventure, birds, challenge, danger, escape, fauna, flora, france, mountains, natural history, pyrenees, spain, transition, travel, trekking, trial, w...

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53 comments

 

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Cherry G. wrote 792 days ago

Hi Lee,
I've just finished your Trekking book and wanted to give you a few comments.
I thought the way you combined the narrative with Karen was very well done and made it for me. The different view (often when on same summit) were both interesting and humorous. I especially enjoyed the contrast in your experience of trekking and your general fitness and preparation. It added so much personal interest. It reminds a little of the (very much less ambitious) hill walking I used to do with my husband when we were younger. When the mist came down on the summit of Ben Macdui in the Scottish Highlands, he had to navigate us off using a compass that had bubble in it, due to the altitude, my husband told me. Our stories of our adventure aftrewards were VERY different. Mine told of contemplating death and wishing I'd written a will and his told of interest in the weather/ local climate that had led to the sudden fog and the strong winds. He showed me the map afterwards, only then revealing how close we were to sheer drops and dangerous crags. Perhaps it was fortunate I couldn't see more than 12 inches in front of me!
Enjoyed all your observations on wildlife etc, and it really is like having the benefits of the trek without having to do the ardous work.
Well done. It deserves to do well.
Cherry G, " Sister; One Woman's Journey through the Trojan War"

name falied moderation wrote 654 days ago

Dear Lee and Karen
I love this book cover and coupled with the title i had to read on. your long pitch just grabbed me so well crafted it is as is your book. my favorite genre and i truly found my couch traveling mind was in gear. I was on the edge at times and really travel well through the window you have supplied me with. I have not read it all, please put the remainder up......I will carry on reading and comment further on as I would like to get this book of yours backed to assist it on the climb to the top.
Backed for sure my me. ..I would really appreciate it if your would look at my book, COMMENT , and back it. If not that is OK also
The VERY best of luck with your book

Denise
The Letter

wespollet wrote 713 days ago

Hi Lee & Karen, Wow what an experience. I hope you film it. I think it would make a marvelous Docudrama and its a trip of a life time. Even your friendly 'companion fly' I BACK the book! Harold Alvin(ICON)Wesley

Valley Woman wrote 734 days ago

I read only the prologue and skipped to chapter 8 because my sister had been one of those pilgrims you mentioned--three times to be exact. I recognized Roncevalles from the many dispatches she sent friends and families.

Your writing flows nicely and I visualize the terrain and weather from your vivid descriptions. Will read more later since I enjoy reading travel memoirs. For now popping your true life story on my shelf.

Patricia

HarrietG wrote 745 days ago

Hello Lee and Karen, you backed my book and asked if I'd look at yours. I said I would, and I keep my promises.

But before I start, I'll tell this straight: I'm not your target audience so you've got your work cut out with me. I've bagged a Munro or two in my time but only on clear days with the wind behind me - I'm not the rugged outdoor type and know nothing of the jargon of mountaineering. As a reader and (amateur) writer, I found a lot of glitches you could have fixed easily. Check your grammar and proof your spellings. A bigger problem, for me, was the tone and the style. I did not feel pulled into your trek in any way or at any point. One example, did you see any of the animals you describe in the nature notes? If so tell me about them, and how you felt about seeing them. Make a connection. The point of a book like this is surely to show me what it's like to walk the HRP so I can experience it without actually having to make the effort to do it. I want to feel your blisters, and I can't. I see from the last word that you've got supplemental material and that would no doubt have enhanced the text a good deal.

Best wishes, and thanks for backing my book. Harriet

Here's the nitpicking... Notes jotted down as I go along. I read the whole, but the notes below only relate to ch1-4. I don't think I'd deal differently with the rest.

Prologue: this prologue does not entice me to read on. It's the jargon I'm afraid - you throw route numbers at me, possibilites of failure, and then take away any tension by giving away the end. I know this is true life, not fiction but I want a reason to read on... Jargon alert very first para, please give all abbreviations in full at first appearance with only 26 letters in the alphabet there's a great deal of redundancy in three letter acronyms, in my everyday life 'HRP' means 'horse radish peroxidase'.

Ch2 typos, para 2 "English Lake District" if you please. Para 3 grammar seems strange to my ear, 'trained in'?

The level of small detail in Lee's section is overwhelming - does the date really matter? And if you flag up that you start late in the day then I expect some drama to result but it doesn't. All feels a bit flat somehow. The landscape is lost in this detail: I want to feel myself with the sun on my neck wading through the bracken and the heather, or the springy turf underfoot or whatever. What is the bygone history you mention - should I know? Does it matter? Again, coming down the mountain I lose the big picture in the detail.

Karen's section: I like this better... it made me smile and tells a story. This would work as your prologue.

Ch 3: flat opening... better to show me expectation building than just tell me. Nature note seems odd and out of context. Jargon is back: you lost me with 'flats and acute angles'. Exposition about crevasses frankly patronising. Grammar, should be 'Karen and me" though I'd probably use 'us' in this context. Spelling, reconnoitre. A very short Karen section.

You probably don't want me to go on... I know I'm coming across as a nitpicking nag and I try to offer constructive criticism. As I said, I'm not your target readership. Everything I've said is my response; someone else's is likely to be very different.

Light Between Shadows wrote 746 days ago

Certainly two different things happening here - reading Lee's parts, I need a glossary for all the climbing terms and am inclined to skim until I find some lovely observance of nature made personal like the bit about the owls in France compared to childhood memories. Like that a lot and think with more of that you'd have a more universally appealing book. Being a woman and more like Karen, I dove more into her ruminations. I think there is potential to weave these two voices together for a powerful book about mountain as metaphor - relationship stuff - all of that universal business that makes for such great reading. That would be my vote rather than the guide part. That could be another book. Just my two cents! Good luck with it and look forward to seeing it develop.
best,
Tricia

PATRICK BARRETT wrote 750 days ago

This is definitely the way to tackle the Pyrenees, read about someone else doing it! I have been in a wheelchair for ten years now and books like yours are a real treat. Perhaps you should start the tale with an incident just to lure the reader in before the more journal style approach? Thank you for putting this on the site. Paula Barrett (Cuthbert-how mean is my valley)

Lockjaw Lipssealed wrote 751 days ago

?Good writing, good story! You mix it up well and maintain that sense of adventure.

Lockjaw

Robert Bresky wrote 752 days ago

Wonderful descriptions of wild horses and setting. Crisp writing style makes for easy reading. I also enjoyed the discussion of your relationship and learned that a refuge in a foreign setting is not the same as a wildlife refuge in the U.S. Nature, relationships and humor, who could ask for anything more. Will back gladly.

Robert Bresky wrote 752 days ago

Thanks for the table of contents. Chapter 9 looks like something I might enjoy.

Robert Bresky wrote 752 days ago

Having a Great Pyrenees dog named Isabel is the closest I've been to the setting in this book. I think I'll read more.

Andy M. Potter wrote 752 days ago

L&K, accomplished prose. on my shelf.
as to your question about whether this could be fiction or travelogue, i see your current form - travelogue - as a better route to publication. not that publication means a damn. just kidding. ;)
anyhoo, there are loads of novels out there, and from what i know (my brother is in the publishing business in Canada), publishers prefer non-fiction. it's a better market. that said, i'm talking of Canada, and who knows. A good book will conquer any market.
best of luck to you!
This is a fine tale. cheers, andy

bonalibro wrote 767 days ago

The Pyrenees are one of the world's great treks and I envy you that you were able to do it. As is, I think this would appeal mostly to trekkers and mountaineers as a guide to what they can expect on the way. As a travel book though it seems lacking in its observation of the local culture and exchanges with the local people. It also seems to lack that spiritual element. I know from my own experiences with trekking that reaching the destination safely is always the paramount concern but, there is, nonetheless, a spiritual calm and meditative sensibility that settles upon me when I've left civilization behind for days at a time and I think that must be true of everyone. You write a lot about packing routines and altitudes gained but not so much of the fears faced down and the insights gained. It also needs more colorful description of the vistas, the flora and the fauna. A lot about buzzards and vultures but, not much else.

I think what you have in your hiking journal is raw material for a far better book, a novel about the experience, which, as you live in the Pyrenees, you could populate with neighbors and friends as if they were people you met along the way and you could fill in some of the scenic descriptions with observations from day hikes, and so forth.

Christopher R. Williams wrote 769 days ago

This is the story of a great adventure that would suit anyone who loves mountaineering (naturally) but also anyone who loves the outdoors or aspires to do something fantastic! A nice flowing pace that is easy to read and which effortlessly takes you along the journey. It’s told from two different perspectives on occasions which gives the story added dimension, and it’s humorous in places too. Well done. A great book. I enjoyed reading it and recommend it without hesitation.

Regards, Chris Williams – The Stories of Rhys
www.thestoriesofrhys.com

Callaghan Grant wrote 775 days ago

Your first chapter contains a brilliant metaphore for life itself! What would like be without the changes of plans!

I read chapter 10 too. Poor Karen and bravo to her for hanging in there. I know it all worked out but you must not push yourselves OR each other. As a TEAM you are only as strong as your weakest member. We must remember that, although just as strong emotionally and spiritually and mentally as a man, women have weaker bodies. A man must be patient, supportive and calmly confident as a leader. He must never risk pushing himself or his team members beyond their limits. This is a great recounting of a giant accomplishment. You have approached it from the outside rather than from inside the experience itself. I would recommend a rewrite that captures this journel style so that it reads more like a fiction story as I have done with The Shouting Tree.
Backed with love, Callaghan

chvolkoff wrote 777 days ago

Wow, I want pictures!!! I didn't know they had dolmens in the Pyrenees...however, the Basque civilization is supposed to be as old as the Egyptians. I like the "journal" form of this story. I have read quite a few ascension stories, Everest, Denali, this is packed with information, and will be a great travelogue. Maybe there might be a way to make it come a little more to life, possibly with some specific scenes being expanded with on the spot dialogue, but all in all it delivers, and I am happy to back it.

A. Zoomer wrote 777 days ago

Hi Lee and Karen,
I am an experienced hiker from Canada. Live in Vancouver. I love hiking and I too have an academic background that gets in the way of my writing. I read your prologue and I wanted to take out-the 'of courses', 'in fact's, 'mays'. I wanted you to give me examples of situations not a summary of what the state was. It feels like you are talking down to me the reader. I promise you I'll get it.

Mr. Nom de Plume wrote 779 days ago

This wonderful adventure will, in my opinion, delight many readers. Not only will the work delight, but it is instructive concerning the importance of preparations, and the dangers possible to encounter if a trip of this magnitude is taken lightly. My hat is off to people who willingly take risks to reap the rewards of life close to nature and all its wonders. Backed. Chuck (Paperboy Adventures)

Anthony Brady wrote 782 days ago

Lee - Quelle Nouvelle?

You are 13 on the Weekly Chart today: I am at 20. I am putting you on my Shelve for the next 24 hours in the hope of giving you a boost. Un beau geste..

Bonne Chance - Mon Ami.

Tony Brady - SFAEL - Books 1,2 & 3.

SusieGulick wrote 783 days ago

Dear Lee, I got your message of your backing "He Loves Me." :) Since I have already backed your book & commented on it to help it advance, I took it off of my shelf & watchlist & then put it back on my watchlist & this comment will help it go up, too . :) Can you return the favor by taking a moment to BACK/COMMENT on my UNEDITED version? ... "Tell Me True Love Stories"
Thanks, Susie :)

SusieGulick wrote 783 days ago

Dear Lee & Karen, I love that you have told us your story & that the rest will beon authonomy soon. I like that you have a prologue & table of contents so I will know what is going to happen. (I need to add that to my books) It is a good read because you create interest by having short paragraphs, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm BACKING/COMMENTING on your book to help advance it. :) PLEASE take a moment to BACK/COMMENT on my TWO Books, ... "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" ... and the UNEDITED version? ... "Tell Me True Love Stories"
Thanks, Susie :)

Maggie P wrote 784 days ago

You might be surprised to read that as well as romance, I absolutely love books like this. It all started when I was 15 and our English teacher gave us a choice of 'Pride and Predjudice' or 'Venture To The Interior' written by Laurens van der Post a prominent explorer and political advisor and friend of Prince Charles. Well Already being more than a bit familiar with P&P I plonked for the Venture and was hooked for life! Your book gripped me from the outset, I like your relaxed easy style and adding Karens comments gives another perspective. I also particularly like the way you sprinkle your knowledge of flora and fauna in to give depth. You might want to look at the language used, for me it's great to reads words like fayre and gloaming, but I am constantly being told to bring my language 'up to date' to appeal to a modern audience, though I'm not sure I'm that convinced. Sorry to ramble, backed with pleasure, Maggie P.

Strauss wrote 784 days ago

This is the sort of book that I would love to write, but I never will simply because I lack an outward bound bone in my body!! I sweat and complain my way to the tops of hills, relish the exhilaration once at the peak, then sweat and complain my way back down again. So, the only way to really enjoy these sorts of activities are to read other peoples' accounts! I'm popping this on the shelf. Good luck! Straussy

greeneyes1660 wrote 786 days ago

Lee and Karen...First off I would like to thank you for sharing your journey...I feel all journeys are meant to be shared for many reasons. Enlightenment, knowledge, and fun to name a few...I like so many things about this piece...

I love the fact that we see it from to different points of view. It's nice to see how the same experience offers different things, as often our personal paths are at different stages. I love the education, as I have not been to Europe and being from the USA it showed me a side I would have never known.

Your imagery of the wildlife and plantlife was marvelous. I have only read 5 chapters but I will come back for more........Backed with pleasure Patricia aka Columbia Layer of the Heart

holdril wrote 786 days ago

The story is a little opiniated. This is 2010 lycra, dehydrated food and other comforts of home make this trek easy. In an earlier time braver souls that you laid out that path.
Be aware we see further today because we stand on the shoulders of giants.

soutexmex wrote 786 days ago

Man, this is something else indeed. Not the life for me but thank you for sharing it. It would be more awesome for the short pitch, you stated: how to survive bear country!

In the long pitch, a bit too much telling. But this is non-fiction so it's tricky. SHE;VED for the subject and good writing. I can use your comments on my book when you get the chance. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau Key
Authonomy's #1 rated commentator

David Fearnhead wrote 787 days ago

I'm not such a fan out the outdoors, I like to know I'm never to far away from a warm shower, a comfortable bed and a well stocked fridge. So you might expect me to get nothing out of your novel. However, I like a good adventure story. I love the long treks through the wilderness, the aim of accomplishing something, I get it...I just don't particularly want to do it myself. So I was more than happy that you did it for me. I found this a very enjoyable read. I really like how you sectioned the book off in parts it felt raw like it was happening and I found myself on a journey with you. I backed this early but i know I'm far from done reading it.
David
Bailey of the Saints

Beval wrote 787 days ago

Most enjoyable. I wish there had been pictires, because your descriptions of the mountains and the scenery make me wish I could see them.
I very much enjoyed your "nature notes", the flora and fauna of the region is unknown to me and I was very interested to discover what there was.

Mathew Bartlett wrote 787 days ago

Definitely on my shelf - can't wait to read more! O for more leisure to read such books, instead of meeting publishing deadlines!

Anthony Brady wrote 789 days ago

Lee - Je reviens

Just to let you know I have Backed and Shelved your book again to try and nudge it up the weekly Chart. Would you like to suggest a Chapter that I may Comment on?

A Bientot!

Tony Brady - SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE
Now complete trilogy is on Authonomy


Burgio wrote 789 days ago

I liked this book a lot. I hike a little so the book's pitch popped out at me. I think the descriptions of the scenary and the many adjustments needed to be made to make this trek work are the strengths of the book. Very interesting and also very informative. I learned a lot. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

S Richard Betterton wrote 790 days ago

I've read ch 1 and ch 8 and found this delightful. I know the Pyrenees a bit (ski stations, walking in Ordesa, motorbiked across, camped near Panticosa) and find them absolutely beautiful, so it was lovely to be taken back there by your writing. I like the style, including the nature note, and Karen's comments. I have also camped (in Eastern Turkey) with sheep running round and round our tent, but I left them too it and eventually got to sleep!
One typo in ch 8: lastnight -> last night.
Great stuff, backed!
Cheers,
Simon

Melcom wrote 790 days ago

Wow, an epic journey you undertook and lived to tell the tale!! You are braver people than I, that's for sure.

You have told your fascinating story really well, keeping the readers interest through every step of your mammoth journey.

Happily shelved

Melxx

klouholmes wrote 790 days ago

Hi Lee and Karen, The synopsis didn't say much about the possibilities of getting lost but that really jolted me at the beginning of the Swiss trek. This is a wonderful chronicle, partly because some of it seems possible for anyone and then you went the whole way - and I like the comparisons with urban stress. It's written in a delectable way with descriptions of the ponies and chestnuts and the panorama. Karen's comments in the narration became expected and a nice break. I especially appreciated the sections on eagle owls and the fungus. The narration is both pleasant and informative with the naturalist leaning! Easily shelved - Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

Kit Small wrote 791 days ago

Not my type of thing usually but this definitely has a target audience. Will be popular with like-minded people for sure!

Kit
Blue Fire

Fromante wrote 792 days ago

A most interesting and intriguing description of an epic journey. I would have loved to have been able to do this in my young days, but work and family came first. I did have an idea to walk the coasts of the UK, and parts of the moors and valleys, writing peoms as description and taking photo's, with the idea of making it into a book. Your book has now made me dream of doing it, but alas, my old body is too knackered to take it on. I applaud you both and the excellent book you have written about your adventures. Good Luck. Backed.
Norman.

Rakhi wrote 792 days ago

This was amazing. This book satisfies the reader at so many levels - it's a wonderful story, it's as real as it can be, it gives us a vivid description of the scenes and sites, it provides future trekkers with vital information, it educates us and most of all entertains us. What more can a reader want? I also love the insight into the relationship and personalities of both husband and wife. Great Job, my pleasure to back this.
Rakhi (Sir William...)

Cherry G. wrote 792 days ago

Hi Lee,
I've just finished your Trekking book and wanted to give you a few comments.
I thought the way you combined the narrative with Karen was very well done and made it for me. The different view (often when on same summit) were both interesting and humorous. I especially enjoyed the contrast in your experience of trekking and your general fitness and preparation. It added so much personal interest. It reminds a little of the (very much less ambitious) hill walking I used to do with my husband when we were younger. When the mist came down on the summit of Ben Macdui in the Scottish Highlands, he had to navigate us off using a compass that had bubble in it, due to the altitude, my husband told me. Our stories of our adventure aftrewards were VERY different. Mine told of contemplating death and wishing I'd written a will and his told of interest in the weather/ local climate that had led to the sudden fog and the strong winds. He showed me the map afterwards, only then revealing how close we were to sheer drops and dangerous crags. Perhaps it was fortunate I couldn't see more than 12 inches in front of me!
Enjoyed all your observations on wildlife etc, and it really is like having the benefits of the trek without having to do the ardous work.
Well done. It deserves to do well.
Cherry G, " Sister; One Woman's Journey through the Trojan War"

Sly80 wrote 793 days ago

Some lovely language emerging as we begin the adventure, 'splendid views, crisp until the curtains of rain swept in from the north'. The reality, camping out on Scafell in inclement weather, slightly less lovely, I would imagine, 'coincident with more violent gusts'. What a joy Karen's outlook is too, 'I didn't even know what an altimeter was'. Lots of interesting snippets, e.g. the unpronounceable mountain name in Euzkarien, and the pottock, and the eagle owl (the last I knew a bit about). The nature notes are a clever feature. 'The sort of plan that ends in difficult terrain, no path, or even darkness', she's got him mapped. I enjoyed travelling along with you two for the first 5 chapters, and would happily read more. No fights so far, but plenty for the imagination to latch onto in such diverse landscapes. Very well written … backed.

Suggestions: I wouldn't use HRP in your opening paragraph … maybe just say 'high route'. Also consider not letting the reader know the conclusion at the start as this takes all the tension out of the read … even non-fiction (if not academic work) benefits from reader uncertainty. Your conclusions will make a nice ending to the 'story'. (I just spotted Sheila's comment, and I would add my agreement.) What would be useful in the prologue or somewhere in the beginning is WHY? Of all the challenges in the world, why this one, and why you two? Abbreviations such as 'wkd' would be better avoided (think of your translators when you get published internationally!).

Sheila Belshaw wrote 793 days ago

TREKKING THE PYRENEES:

Lee and Karen,

Writing this memoir in tandem really works very well. You both have a lovely flowing style of prose that makes it an easy read.

I learned a great deal just from reading the first three chapters, and although I couldn't contemplate your exciting adventure myself, you made me very aware of its attractions and its pitfalls.

I only have one suggestion to make and that is that just about everything in the prologue could be fed in gradually into the body of the book, blending it in amongst the action, so that the reader isn't confronted with a chunk of info right at the start. I would even suggest starting with some very memorable, even a bit hairy, event with action and immediacy, that would hook the reader from the first sentence, and get him turning the pages.
Then you could go back to the beginning of the journey.

This is such a wonderful story that I really hope you can secure a publishing deal. It's a book I can see fitting in very well in Waterstone's travel section, in airport bookshops, and in libraries.

Good luck, and I have great pleasure in placing this on my bookshelf.
Backed.
Sheila (Pinpoint)

Francesco wrote 794 days ago

Backed with pleasure! Good Luck!!
A look at Sicilian Shadows would be greatly appreciated.
Frank.
If you back my work, you may also want to approach BJD (a big supporter of my work) for a further read and possible backing of your book.

Linda Lou wrote 797 days ago

hullo Lee. all that I can do about your book is to say thank you for taking me into places which I KNOW I will never see in my lifetime. please consider my book and thank you in advance


Linda Lou Long
Southern dis-Comfort
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=11421

david brett wrote 798 days ago

I commented on this, but it got lost in an electronic bog somewhere, or walked around in a circle in the mist. A very enjoyable introduction or 1/6th of a book, and I was regretting there was not more of it. More chapters needed. Very much my sort of enterprise, so I am biased in favour . Regret this site cannot offer some graphic/photographic element....I would have loved a map. DB ALL THESE ARE MEMORIES OF MY VOYAGE

thegadfly4u wrote 798 days ago

You did an excellent job of setting the stage for your journey. My only suggestion is to avoid the use of sentences that are incomplete, for example, in the first paragraph after the question "Finally?" The next sentence is a phrase and not a complete sentence.

Otherwise, I think your approach draws the reader into the adventure.

The Gadfly



The Gadfly

Barry Wenlock wrote 799 days ago

Hi Lee,
Your short account of your trek in the Pyrenees includes some excellent notes on flora and fauna. I'd like to see a little more of this.
It strikes me as a very personal diary. It includes some notes on your feelings re. concerns for your partner, but we learn little else about her or you as a person, except what we can extrapolate. There is no dialogue, so your wife remains hidden, a background figure. A bit of a weight on your back sometimes, it seems? And yet you cope admirably and keep it together.
I read the whole thing but I don't feel. I've learned very much about the country you are in or the Pyrenees generally. Or the route you took, for that matter. I learned you ate yoghurt from a pot and checked your mail and that your corn played you up. These seem like personal memories but are not of huge interest to others. More description please.
You bother to give altitudes to 'peaks' below 600m -- small hills, surely. I'd stick to putting altitudes to peaks above 1000m.
You seem to fear winter but actually you finish by the end of October. Is there no autumn in the Pyrenees? I understand about winter-conditions at higher altitudes, but you might need to make this clearer to your readers. You mention 4 seasons in your pitch but only trek for a month and a half. I know this is a long time to trek but it's not 4 seasons. Confusing.
Some phrases are over-written -- all through the trek -- throughout the trek
for that would not then be -- for that wouldn't be an adventure
I was yawning by the end of chapter six -- nothing happens in that chapter.
You use ; (semi-colon) too many times. Consider using full stops instead sometimes -- Karen froze; is one of many examples. An occasional dash might also help.
I think you use 'then' too many times. Then is usually a redundant word. One we speak but which adds nothing to a sentence. Try cutting some out and then reading the sentence -- it's the same. It doesn't need then, the reader already knows that.
Maps and photos, of course may help to bring it more to life. To be honest, it is rather flat, although I thought the prologue was okay generally. The meaning of the HRP was well described. Some real dialogue would help, more description of places, more feelings, more wife, more action. I'm sure you could make the knife-edge ridge crossing more dramatic. Writers are even allowed to exaggerate sometimes, for dramatic effect!
Just my opinions and I hope they are useful to you. Good luck and all best wishes, Barry

DougB wrote 801 days ago

Hi Lee, I read some of this and backed it yesterday, and came back to it again today and went right through. I was there - it seemd like, and once I was well en route so to speak I actually forgot your voice and ujst visualised the entire trek. Brilliant for those who have never done anything like it and a great reminder for anyone who has ever had to train at high altitude and face the rigours of planning and execution. Brilliant that you and the "old lady" madeiti and lived to tell the tale - lol lol.

Made we want to go back to Saint Jean de Luz as well and make the trip along to Hendaye for a galss of vin!!

LGW wrote 802 days ago

Sue, thankyou for your comment and suggestion. I'm still adapting the authonomy submission from web pages intended for 'in the know' trekkers, and will do some editing soon. The GR actually stands for Grand Randonée == long distance footpath. The GR10 runs the length of the Pyrenees wholly within France while the GR11 counterpart parallels it in Spain.

Regards, Lee

hot lips wrote 803 days ago

When I was a student i was in the mountaineering club, and did much hill walking in the Mournes. This book reminded me of those happy times. Reading this, I am reminded of the great joy of getting away and back to nature. One returns from such trips with a different view of life. I enjoyed this and back it with enthusiasm.
BADD

vanessa musson wrote 806 days ago

Have come back to check out the prologue, which is great - it sets the scene, introduces us to Karen, positions her as a strong, feisty character, and whets our interest not only to learn how the trek itself goes, but what impact the inherent arduousness of the trip and your being thrown together 24/7 might have on the pair of you.

You also make the point at this early stage that the walk enabled you to escape from the greater stresses of normal life, and I think a lot of readers - thinking they are too caught up in the rat race, not taking any exercise etc - will be intrigued by that, and it will give them pause for thought, and maybe even inspire a few to follow suit. And there is the flora and fauna aspect too, which I found fascinating.

And then for the more fainthearted, you give an alternative purpose for the book - "a good read" for "armchair travellers" - such as myself. Well, when it comes to travelling on two legs, certainly.

All in all, this draws the reader in perfectly - and I loved the phrase: "Boots were traded for pens and keyboard"! : - )

All the best with this!
Vanessa
Banana In The Briefcase

gillyflower wrote 806 days ago

This is a delightful book, full of beautiful word pictures, entertaining anecdotes, and adventure. You tell us in your Prologue that many unplanned things happened to you on your trek, such as, 'the day when Karen threatened to beat me with her trekking pole.' You show us the lovely pines, the mountain peaks, and the malodorous dump which you had to pass twice, having gone the wrong way and been forced to retrace your steps. Your Nature Notes, about, for instance, the Great Eagle Owl gain in interest as you tell us of how you heard deep owl notes, which may well have been the Great Eagle, later that night. Your writing style is excellent, clear and professional. This book is a pleasure to read; and all the more so when we can reflect that you and Karen are doing the trekking, not us! Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

Anthony Brady wrote 806 days ago

Lee - Eh Allors!

J'ai lu ton livre. Bien sure!

That's enough french although I could write all this en la plus belle langue but there is no facility for inserting accents here.

Thank you for your tip about signing off after leaving a message. I have Backed your book. Not because you backed mine but because it is an exceptionally well crafted example of its genre. You write in Scenes with the necessary connective human observations. The frisson sensuel energising your feelings for your life partner is an earthy counterpoint to the profuse observations on all the forms of life about you.

There's no trace of a cliche anywhere in your accont. I never thought I would read about the Pyrenees and not come across: " Do you remember an Inn Miranda? Do you remember an Inn? No need to mention ..."the fleas that tease in the high P ..." with your vivid descriptions of the insects.

I look forward to the completion of your book and shall enter you as a Friend once I find out how do to it on this Authonomy system.

A bientot - mon Ami a nouveau. Best Regards Tony Brady SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE


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