Killing Elizabeth

The last paragraph is surprising to say the least. What is her ham with this bloke. Why does he take her anywhere if there is a history or is she a nutter? I will read on.

I am backing this on the merit of the writing, I do not give out freebies and I expect nothing in return.

Autumn Rosen
My Four Fathers & Eleanor
My Novel Affair

Hi Simon

Great writing, clear, unpretentious, accurate. Every scene is brought dramatically to life through the pov of the character in it, whether it's Kelly or Vern, and their voices are well individuated. This really engages with contemporary mores and issues. Backed.

Nicole
Chosen

Nice, nice, nice. Haven't had time to read all you have here but will be coming back for more. Backed with pleasure. Lizzie Scott :-)

Backed! Interesting, we have cold-blooded killers in our book also ( the six women)!
CC Brown
Dark Side

a very good story. really enjoyed it.
Neil
The Magic Bed.

Nice twist that makes this freshing and a real who the hell dunnit? Supercool, characters are good, story is tight and the writing flows.

A nice chilling plot that sends the reader pounding for more! I like it Simon - a neat contentious plot that opens up old wounds too deep!

Backed,

Rome
Directives for Murder

Dear Simon, thank you for backing Bleak House Bleak Shed which prompted me to dip into Killing Elizabeth using my usual criteria of can the first page or even paragraph get me in? that's if your synopsis hasn't put them off. As you're no doubt aware it's treatment we receive in the publisher's slush pile - some young graduate with a newly minted creative writing degree gets slush duty for the day, a daunting task. Your opening engages and the reader wants to know more. A good start. All the best. T. L. Bartush

Simon,

This is a great piece of work. I read Chapter 1 and the array of emotions you evoked in me through your words is uncanny. Fabulous.
Incredible characterization.
Well developed scene.
Great twist to the plot.
Congratulations!
Good Luck!
Backing!
Sammy Sutton
King Solomon's '13'

Simon

I don't think I've read a better opening sentence.

I've just read the first chapter and was immediately taken with your collection of dark characters. I'll be back.

I've already decided your book's worth backing.

Jim H

Quite an interesting pitch, especially since I'm an Elizabeth too. Your opening depiction of the homeless Kelly is very compelling. I'll have to read further to find out the secret.
BACKED

Elizabeth Wolfe
Would you consider backing my book, MEMORIES OF GLORY? I thank you for taking a look.

The hook drew me in and the few chapter I read I enjoyd. A good face pace, the interchange between characters reads well, some good dialogue. (1st part sounds a bit like the opening to My Fair Lady. You do repeat yourself using the same word/s in either the same sentence or near to.
On the whole promising. Good luck

Good stuff Simon, I'm enjoying this. No nits to pick, really. Sorry not to be more helpful.
Backed
Best
Pip

This is a page turner!

Thank you for sharing this with us here, on authonomy.

Backed with pleasure.

Johanna Kern
Master and the Green-Eyed Hope

Simon
The thing that hooked me very quickly was the characters. You cram a lot of depth into them very quickly, it's very hard to do yet you make it so easy. I read to the end of chap 1, and enjoyed it. A few moments made me laugh, particularly the description of Eric's legendary shit. Good luck with this, hope it does well.
Charlie

You have sculpted a brilliant story which has well developed characters that draw the reader in to the deceit you have succesfully created. The interconnectivity of characters also helps as people want to read on to see what the pasts of the characters are. Multiple storylines brings the reader in further as the reader will be keen to see what character surfaces next. Overall this is a well written story that definately deserves backing and publication. Could you have a look at my manuscript The Sacred Pool.

Laurence

Hi Simon, what a marvelous job of telling whom killed whom, Then the trying of Adrian and Kelly and both being found not guilty in eight situtation. I Marvelous job and I BACK the book. Harold Alvin(ICON)Wesley

Simon,

This is good, well-paced story-telling. The different, seemingly unconnected threads at the start (Adrian and Kelly / Vern and Lewis), work well, as does the connection between the two at the end of chapter 2.

There's repetition in the second paragraph of the very first chapter that doesn't quite work. That of the word 'cold' is fine, it empasises that aspect, but you've also repeated 'so', which lessens the effect. Perhaps . . .

It was raining and cold, bitterly cold. And she was so sick of the cold.

You also use cold (well, cold. cold and colder) three times in the following paragraph. You could replace the first with 'freezing'.

Other than that no other technical problems caught my attention.

Backed. Should do well.

Neil.

Hi Simon, An action packed mystery of who killed who and knowing who was really guilty of killing Elizabeth. Then going to court and and at two seperate trials found not guilty in either incident. You have done a marvelous job of keeping my interest peaked. I was striving to figure out how they would escape either murder. You did and excellent job of working a solution where they walked awy from both incident. Well done and I BACK the book. Harold Alvin(ICON)Wesley

Hi Simon, An action packed mystery of who killed who and knowing who was really guilty of killing Elizabeth. Then going to court and and at two seperate trials found not guilty in either incident. You have done a marvelous job of keeping my interest peaked. I was striving to figure out how they would escape either murder. You did and excellent job of working a solution where they walked awy from both incident. Well done and I BACK the book. Harold Alvin(ICON)Wesley

Hi Simon, An action packed mystery of who killed who and knowing who was really guilty of killing Elizabeth. Then going to court and and at two seperate trials found not guilty in either incident. You have done a marvelous job of keeping my interest peaked. I was striving to figure out how they would escape either murder. You did and excellent job of working a solution where they walked awy from both incident. Well done and I BACK the book. Harold Alvin(ICON)Wesley

very nice read,beautiful pace nice intensity. you pulled me in immediately backed

scorselo the communicator

This is an excellent opening. The short blurb makes promises of what to expect and the long blurb grips you into wanted to read it. Backed!

The opening line made me smile and your work certainly seems to get the hooks in, I didn't want to stop reading it.
Thoroughly enjoyed what I've read so far.

Jo G

Hi Simon,

Sweet! Wonderdful plotting, lovely character development. Funny and exciting .Gave me the giggles and thrilling finish. Can see it as a movie. A pleasure to read and a delight to back. Now shelved.

Thanks for backing Kali's Daughters
Bobbee


Cheer

Hi Simon,
Beautiful writing and clever humor. Excellent work and on my shelf with pleasure.
Jan
Fringe of Darkness

GREAT premise!!

Killing Elizabeth, Hi Simon, Thanks for backing Deep State. Looked at your book. Backed it. Why? Obviously the best opening line on authonomy. Possibly in english lit. (It was the best of times and the worst of times?) Beyond that, very engaging indeed. Quick effective characterisation. Consistent in later chapters. would love to read the book. No time. sorry. Any helpful/critical comments on deep state at all. thanks. PhilMc

Very nice clean writing, well-drawn characters and situations, makes for a compelling read. Backed.
Brenan
Chronicles of Disgetorix: Son of Dis Ater.

Most enjoyable read. You draw a good picture with your writing. The story flows well. A couple of places you over used some words but I don't think it stands out too badly.
Backed
Nick
Invasion From Within

HI Simon,
This is very good; very well written.
I've only read the first chapter, but I'm looking forward to reading more.
Backed.
Kat
The Real Poop

Simon, nice set up and several good hooks. Will keep reading.
Paula L

Just read chapter 1 and am excited to see how the storylines come together. You paint a wonderful picture with your words. Great work!
Love and Hugs,
Farrah

Simon,
Excellent dialogue; the humour is decanted in generous measures and the pace is perfect. This is brilliant stuff. Sadly, I can only read off screen for a short while, but from what I've got through so far, this is bound to be a success. Backed it with confidence.
Katy Christie
No Man No Cry

Now then...a Christopher Brookmyre fan. Presently reading about Noodsy, Scott, Jamesy, Karen and Martin at the mo myself - primary school stuff is hilarious. Will continue to read him.
Had a look at yours - backed - best of luck.

Rob(When...?)

Thank you for backing "The right Yoke". I have just finished your first chapter. I am totally confused about who everyone is and what happened to the homeless girl and how do all these other people fit in. I suppose that is a good thing? I will read more later. Backed. Alan

Thankyou so much for backing my book.
I have almost finished the first two chapters, it was the pitch that originally drew me in, and the first line alone was very grasping. I dont usually like this kind of book to be honest, but the way it was written was very impressive.
Keep doing what your doing!

Sam
Species: The war of the Bronze claw

I like the structure a lot. Repulsive Vern probably needs a nice little trait to counterbalance his delightful turn of phrase. The tension as we switch from one scenario to the other builds nicely. I've had this on my shelf for a long time before reviewing, but that's probably good for you?
Rosalind
Good for Him
Twice Twisted

Great pitches and a great first line, and it just gets better after that. I've read the first two chapters (lots of other books to read on the site), but I'll definitely be back. The characters are all suitably repellent while still being believable, and you have lots of good one-liners.

A few quibbles... I'm struggling to think of a reason why Kelly could hate Adrian so much and yet not recognise his voice. Most people need time to get acquainted with a person before they can really appreciate that person's worst points. This makes me wonder if you've set up her history like this because you need someone to drag Adrian down, not because there's a reason that makes sense to her. Would it spoil a plot twist later on if you gave more of a clue in the first scene?

Lewis' dialogue is perhaps too stiff and formal in places, though I can accept he's meant to be that sort of character.

I wondered why, when Vern buys a drink at the bar, he didn't have to prove his age. Later on you say he's drinking Coke, which explains it. You should perhaps mention that when he buys the drink.

Well done - I'm backing this.

Hi Simon

You sure do know how to grab a reader's attention - from the very first sentence I was intrigued. You threw me into the plot straight away with your punchy narrative, and the second scene immediately ignited my imagination. Good luck .

Laurelle
'One of the WAGS'

Hi Simon,

As usual, time prevents me from reading as much of this as I would like but I am very impressed with what I have read so far.
I can't offer any suggestions for improvement, it seems perfect as it is - I couldn't even find a typo.

Ron

I fell through the pages always wanting more. Your dialogue is great along with character depth and development. Definitely publish worthy and backed with much pleasure.

Simon,
This is both extremely clever and very well written. I particularly like the way nothing is quite what it seems and everyone appears to be lying to everyone else. The characters are evolving into real, complex, flawed but intriguing people and you've got the pace exactly right, always switching POV at a climax or new revelation.
I've just reached the end of chapter 2 and hadn't guessed the connection with the other story thread until the last few lines. - Very clever indeed. I think I'm going to have to come back to this and read on.
This deserves to do very well.
Congratulations
Simon

I like it. Complex, but smoothly delivered. Great opening line, by the way!

Backed.

All the best
Elaina
Gathering of Rain

A very entertaining read so far...well crafted dialogue really helps to develop the characters...backed for now
Stewart

Simon,

I'm really enjoying this! I've only read up to chapter five, but would like to continue reading. THe characters are interesting, the moments that are meant to be suspenseful are and the mystery is unfolding at a good pace. I like the juxtaposition set up in the image of Adrian as the dutiful (and loving- with the roses when we first meet him) husband and the reality of his marriage. All the best with this!

*kristen*isbell* (RUSH, RUSH; Junior Year, Ingenue)

Killing Elizabeth.
Punchy wakeup in the first sentence, despite the later inconsistency in referring to body parts, or is it that I’m too lazy to work out a change of pov.

The narration moves at a steady pace, and dialogues aren’t boggy.

You might want to concentrate more on locales.

That the “old crone” is Vern’s mother is a craftsperson’s surprise.

Relational conflict is skillfully embroidered into the narrative.

The plausibility of Verne’s rapid recruitment by an astute criminal might or might not go unnoticed, but you’re the boss, and the same goes for typos and oversights such as the hard entry of a new character.

Backed.
Azam Gill
“Blasphemy!”

Brilliant. A tautly told yet complex yarn, an edge of the seat thriller in which you haven't missed a beat or used a superfluous adjective, yet manage to keep the humour bubbling just under the surface. Exactly the style of writing I wish I could emulate. I can't believe you've had to self-publish – or is there an angle to that that I'm missing; is the self-publishing a launchpad for getting an agent?

Definitely backed. Just a pity one can't back twice.

If you can spare the time I'd welcome any criticism of my book which you've already backed.
Alan Donaghue – Action

Hi Simon, so glad you backed Brain Fog it made me go and look at your Killing Elizabeth. It was brilliant. didn't have time unfortunately to get past chapter three but what I read was excellent. - Terri Douglas

Simon, I like the way you write. Almost nothing impresses me as much as writing that pulls me along effortlessly. You also have interesting characters and one heck of a storyline, too. Good luck with your novel

Connie Chastain
Southern Man