Book Jacket

 

rank 5465
word count 17662
date submitted 15.03.2010
date updated 25.07.2010
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Romance,...
classification: moderate
incomplete

A Certain Freedom

Anne Page

Joss Messenger is searching for the truth about the mystery woman who placed red roses on her father’s coffin at his funeral.

 

After the funeral service, the mystery woman, dressed in a black coat with a red rose pinned to the collar, steps forward. She hands Joss a piece of paper. On the scrap of linen foolscap is scrawled Deacon & Co, Solicitors, St David’s, Pembrokeshire. The ink is fountain pen red and the writing a spidery copperplate.

The aftermath of her father’s death takes Joss on a rollercoaster ride back through childhood to university days, passionate involvement in student protest movements, a year travelling in East Africa and the progression of her career as a university lecturer, up to the point where, on a last minute trip to Marrakesh, she meets and falls in love with Ben, her famously unflappable partner and now the father of her two children.

The secret revealed by Deacon of Deacon & Co sets Joss on a new path of discovery that eventually reveals her true birthright, a discovery that leads Joss to re-evaluate her most fundamental beliefs about herself and the world.

For Joss Messenger, academic, writer and mother, nothing will ever be quite the same again.

 
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tags

childhood, contemporary history, east africa, grassroots movements, london, modern women, parentage

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92 comments

 

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Despinas1 wrote 669 days ago

Brilliant. Backed
Helen
The Last Dream

SammySutton wrote 678 days ago

Anne,

I like this story alot, it is interesting. The character you have created in Joss is very easy to bond with and take a journey.
Great writing.
There is a freshness to the plot with twists.
Good Luck!
Sammy Sutton
King Solomon's '13'

Frank Zahn wrote 704 days ago

Anne.........I read all eight chapters. Great writing--fast moving and compelling. Thanks for the read. Backed with best wishes...............Frank

Elizabeth Wolfe wrote 718 days ago

You have a very pretty cover and good title. There is a mysterious tone that starts right in the pitch. Very nice work! BACKED -Elizabeth Wolfe (Memories of Glory)

yasmin esack wrote 733 days ago

Very emotional story and quite suspenseful. I have no problems with backing it.
Didn't however quite capture what was wrong with Joss as a baby. Was she the wrong one or what did the rich doctor dignose??? This needs a little clarification or is it a secet for later?

Backed

Light Between Shadows wrote 738 days ago

The first chapter is captivating. Beautiful writing. In the second chapter - while the writing is also beautiful, the style is so different - and somehow, I am not as riveted as in the first. Maybe shorter flashbacks to capture this but still keep it moving with some of your great dialogue? Just a thought.
Best of luck.
Tricia

thrillerlover wrote 738 days ago

I’ve added your book to my watchlist. Best of luck with it!

Su Dan wrote 750 days ago

style and content comes to mind, here... you know how to write and it flows well, too...on my watchlist for now...
su dan [read SEASONS]

Rachel V wrote 752 days ago

Hi Anne,
Returning your read and comment, as promised, but I'm really sorry, this is not for me. The section you've uploaded doesn't seem to fit what you promise in your pitch, and the mixture of past and present tenses is distracting. I was intrigued by the baby mystery, but eight chapters on we are still meandering through Joss' youth with a variety of characters who seem quite fleeting and I'm not sure whether I need to bother caring about them or not. My initial enthusiasm has faded a bit. Sorry, but I think this needs more work. Good luck with it.

Rachel

A. Zoomer wrote 755 days ago

Great work. I loved the way you told the story.
Keep writing.
a zoomer

E A M Harris wrote 757 days ago

Your pitch is very intriguing, but I'm not sure why your story starts with the death if the mystery is only introduced at the funeral.
I like your writing style and the characters are believable and I care about what happens to them. If I had more time I'd like to read a lot more. Backed.

I wish you luck with it.
Elaine
(Long Lying Below)

Tarouddant wrote 758 days ago

Thanks for your comments and backing for A Certain Freedom. I have backed your book on the srength of the pitch and the first chapter. I'll read more in the next few days.[
Anne
QUOTE] You set the tone for your book right from the outset and built from there - the baby mystery. Your character development is strong, the dialogue is tight and believeable and the use of foreshadowing is superb. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Andrew Burans wrote 758 days ago

You set the tone for your book right from the outset and built from there - the baby mystery. Your character development is strong, the dialogue is tight and believeable and the use of foreshadowing is superb. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Tarouddant wrote 760 days ago

Thanks for your positive comments about A Certain Freedom.
Anne

Interesting flashback to open the story. Left me to wonder where it's headed. Your writing and the dialogue is real and believable. It appears you have a good story here. Good luck

Sean

Tarouddant wrote 760 days ago

Thanks for backing A Certain Freedom. Anne

Backed! Straussy

Tarouddant wrote 760 days ago

thanks fr the comments and the backing.
Anne

Taken an initial look (time as ever at a premium on Authonomy) I like the style and way the opening draws you into the story; characters

that have some depth and hooks that set the trap.

Clive
Cincinnati Dancing Pig

Tarouddant wrote 760 days ago

Thanks for your encouraging comments about A Certain Freedom.
Anne

Terrific writing - you sucked me in right away with the baby mystery, then everything coming from Jake's perspective was really well done.
backed
Genevieve

Tarouddant wrote 760 days ago

Thanks for backing A Certain Freedom. Anne

Wonderful read. Diolouge and charcters are polished and writing flawless. C W Shelved.

Telegraph wrote 761 days ago

Wonderful read. Diolouge and charcters are polished and writing flawless. C W Shelved.

writingwildly wrote 762 days ago

Terrific writing - you sucked me in right away with the baby mystery, then everything coming from Jake's perspective was really well done.
backed
Genevieve

Clive Gilson wrote 762 days ago

Taken an initial look (time as ever at a premium on Authonomy) I like the style and way the opening draws you into the story; characters

that have some depth and hooks that set the trap.

Clive
Cincinnati Dancing Pig

Strauss wrote 763 days ago

Backed! Straussy

Sean Lamb wrote 763 days ago

Interesting flashback to open the story. Left me to wonder where it's headed. Your writing and the dialogue is real and believable. It appears you have a good story here. Good luck

Sean

Tarouddant wrote 763 days ago

Thanks. That's my instinct, but when a number of people say change it I begin to wonder...... I've spent a few years getting the mix of this draft novel the way I want it....
Anne

The movie-style approach to this story works strangely well for me! Don't let anyone tell you to change it. You've done it in a superb way.
xBeccaX
The Forever Girl

Becca wrote 764 days ago

The movie-style approach to this story works strangely well for me! Don't let anyone tell you to change it. You've done it in a superb way.
xBeccaX
The Forever Girl

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

A Certain Freedom- It seems like a happy beginning until the mystifying doctor's office visit. Beautiful prose in Chapter 2 with the memories of Joss. Sounds like Joss and her father had some water under the bridge but she still loved him. It is incredibly hard and emotional to bury your father. You can really feel Joss's conflicting emotions.

Good luck with this, Anne. Gladly already backed.

Jenn-Antar Chronicles

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

Backed with pleasure! Joss E. Morris (A Bore No More)

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

Just realized that I forgot to comment on this. I read the first few chapters last night and thought it was wonderful. The writing is strong and the story flows at a good pace. The pitch is great and your cover photo makes me long for a vacation! Backed yesterday, very glad I did!

Tawn Anderson (Providence)

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

Anne, There is no doubt you can paint a picture and stir emotion.I feel your writing is very descriptive and we can feel the emotions of your MC's...Your pitched pulled me in, yet I was having trouble following the time line so I am not quite sure if you should put what year your in, to help make it more clear for the reader to follow. I only read 3 chapters so I am not sure if it goes back and forth throughout or just the beginning. I love the storyline and will read more when I get some time Backed Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the Heart

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. and for your helpful comments. It's much appreciated.
Anne

I felt you were throwing a little too much information at us in the beginning. The nurse is a little frowny, then she's smiley, but neither seems to be relevant. Then she thinks about her own parents. I wasn't really sure why I was being told that.

It took me a while to figure out what 'Hackney mother's home' meant. It read like a the home of a mother who lived in Hackney who for some reason had a baby ward attached. I guess you mean a mothers' home, which may not be how it's spelt (I don't really know) but makes it clearer. Clearer still would be to name the home, St. Something or other, or maybe calling it a home for mothers.

The brain damage and suggestion she isn't Rosemary's baby is intriguing. I can't think what that could mean but it does make me curious.

I didn't understand what Brechtian meant in this context. Usually it means theatre that acknowledges its own artifice, but how that relates to a cottage by a lake I have no idea.

There were a numbner of punctuation errrors that crept in, missing quotation marks and misplaced commas etc. that could do with sorting out.

The writing is very easy to read and flows well, but occasionally gets a bit wrapped up in itself and becomes unnecessarily repetitive. A good proofread would also help get rid of the more minor errors. It is an interesting read and I think it has potential.

best of luck with it.

regards
mood

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

This is a wonderfully emotive piece, powerful and well constructed, bar the occasional punctuation error and the switching tenses. Yet teh style of this eclipses those minor errors and makes this a really intense hourney at Joss' side.

Great work!
Abi xxx
"Everyone knows the rule: Stay inside the Wall, but Tisha believes rules are made to be broken." - Relic

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book. Its much appreciated.
Anne

I only read chapter one, I found it well written charming and mysterious enough to keep me fully engaged, why did the doctor say, 'bring her up as one of your own'? Backed with pleasure.
BADD

Tarouddant wrote 764 days ago

Hi
Thanks for backing my book and for the helpful feedback.
Anne

Well-constructed plot. I was enraptured with the first chapter. Some misplacement of quotation marks confused me, but those are easily fixed. The narrative voice offers empathy and a gentleness that I found nurturing in a way.
A great start.
Backed,
Ellen (Thoughts of a Teenage GIrl)

ellen911 wrote 765 days ago

Well-constructed plot. I was enraptured with the first chapter. Some misplacement of quotation marks confused me, but those are easily fixed. The narrative voice offers empathy and a gentleness that I found nurturing in a way.
A great start.
Backed,
Ellen (Thoughts of a Teenage GIrl)

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

Read first two chapters and found an elegantly woven tapestry of memories. The death of the grandfather is a tragic spark for a detailed journey into Joss's life. Joss is a well drawn character, and sympathetic character. I loved the opening to chapter two with the baby in the pram, and the proto punk hair. Times and location are wonderfully vivid. The pitch is informative, and leads nicely into the book.

backed with pleasure
Calvin Stephens
Three Feet of Sky



Thanks for backing my book. It's much appreciated.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

You're heading in the right direction with your story. The problem is that you're repeatedly shifting from present tense to past tense. In Chapter one, you start in present and then do the rest of it in past. In chapter two, you jump between the tenses repeatedly. What's the difference? "He runs to the door" (present) verses "He ran to the door" (past). I must warn you that this will cause most agents to reject this.

The entire novel should be in one tense. Most published novels are in past tense. I suggest that you go over this entire book and make sure it is in past tense.

If you decide to make changes, let me know and I'll have another look.

Brian
Mute



Hi
Thanks for your constructive comments. I will be editing these sections in the next few weeks so will let you know when the revised version is up on the site.
There are a few novels written in mixed tense, but most are not.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

This is a wonderfully emotive piece, powerful and well constructed, bar the occasional punctuation error and the switching tenses. Yet teh style of this eclipses those minor errors and makes this a really intense hourney at Joss' side.

Great work!
Abi xxx
"Everyone knows the rule: Stay inside the Wall, but Tisha believes rules are made to be broken." - Relic



Thanks for backing my book. It's much appreciated. I will be editing soon.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

The opening was very good with its build up of what might be wrong with the baby and then the news of the accident and how Joss deals with everything. Promised to be a good read from the pitch and certainly delivered. Jim Darcy The Firelord's Crown


Thanks for backing my book. It's much appreciated.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

I only read chapter one, I found it well written charming and mysterious enough to keep me fully engaged, why did the doctor say, 'bring her up as one of your own'? Backed with pleasure.
BADD


Thanks for backing my book. It's much appreciated.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

A CERTAIN FREEDOM:

Anne,

I can see where you're going with this novel, and it's in a very good direction. The premise is intriguing. The plot is original and full of mystery and twists and turns. The characters are complex and compelling.

The writing could be really good. I can already see it shining through. But at the moment it needs going over several times to iron out punctuation, changes of tense, and a kind of jumping around in sentence and paragraph chronology. It's almost as though you can't quite keep up with your abundance of thoughts and plot points.

Having said that, I found it a compelling read. I think it's hardly fair to judge it at this stage, before you've had time to go over it a few more times. Read it out loud to yourself, several times, slowly, and the little errors will jump out at you.

I have no doubt that this novel will end up being something very special, and I wish you all the luck in your journey to publication.

Backed.

Sheila Mary Taylor (Pinpoint)



Hi
Thanks for your encouraging and constructive comments. I will be editing these sections in the next few weeks and will sort out the tenses and distinguish the different strands, ensure the voice is consistent etc.
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

Anne
I am commenting on your book even though the doctor says I shouldn’t strain my eyes any more for a few more days. I wanted to see what your story would bring, based on your pitch. Unfortunately I found the opening so confusing I just had to stop and say I think this could be a great book but it does need more work. Keep writing and success with it.

I hope you will take a look at my book and, if you feel so inclined, comment on it and back it.

I have backed your book.

Peck
Never Hang Wallpaper With Your Wife



Thanks for making the effort to read my book. I'll be editing the sections up on the site in the next few eeks. When I've sorted out the tenses and made sure that the diffferent strands of present day, dreams, childhood memories, reverie/journal are distinguished, hpefully it will be easier to follow!
Anne

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

Anne, it's a very special book. An unusual and poignant start with sentiment and suspense.
I will back it, and hope you get published.
Thanks for backing my book, Flawless Murder.
Regards
David


Hi David
Thanks for your nice comments, which are much appreciated.
Anne
A Certain Freedom

Tarouddant wrote 765 days ago

evocative and intriguing but at chapter 8 I am still waiting for the mystery promised in the pitch. Will there be more soon?
Thorne (A Time for Silence)


Hi Thorne
Thanks for your comments. I am editing the rest of the book before I put up more sections. The way it's structured at the moment, you do have to wait a while before all becomes clear.
Anne
A Certain Freedom

KW wrote 766 days ago

Your descriptive skills are very nice. I enjoyed the encounter with Tom and Joss in Chapter Seven. There was a little deja vu in that for me. When I get a little more time, I want to read more since it appears you cover quite a lot of territory in this book. Backed for now.

SusieGulick wrote 766 days ago

Dear Anne, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed, "He Loves Me." Thanks so very much. :) Since I have already "backed" & "commented" on your book, I came to your "comment" page to help it advance more. I will also put it on my "watchlist" to hopefully help it move up (everytime someone comments/backs my book, it moves up). Could you please take a moment to back my unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories." I'd be ever so grateful. :) Love, Susie :)
p.s. I always get so excited when I see your name, "Anne," because of Anne of Green Gables - she would always say, "It's Anne with on 'e'" - I love that book series. :)

Peculiar wrote 766 days ago

Hi Anne An interesting and promising story but I must confess there were times when I was a little confused. At one time you say 'Ms' as opposed to Mrs and then say 'Jake's father' One paragraph puzzled me . I Quote, 'once been warm flesh and loving strokes across her brow, sitting next to the four year old Joss.'
I have backed your book because I think it is worth backing but it does need a bit of cleaning up. I hope I haven't offended you, it certainly is not meant that way. Good luck

Colt
A Time for Living

A. Zoomer wrote 769 days ago

Hi Anne,
This is a well crafted story.
I've backed it.
I'd be very interested in what you think of my book, Going Out In Style.
Will you take a look at it?
a zoomer

Euphemus wrote 771 days ago

Anne, it's a very special book. An unusual and poignant start with sentiment and suspense.
I will back it, and hope you get published.
Thanks for backing my book, Flawless Murder.
Regards
David

Sheila Belshaw wrote 771 days ago

A CERTAIN FREEDOM:

Anne,

I can see where you're going with this novel, and it's in a very good direction. The premise is intriguing. The plot is original and full of mystery and twists and turns. The characters are complex and compelling.

The writing could be really good. I can already see it shining through. But at the moment it needs going over several times to iron out punctuation, changes of tense, and a kind of jumping around in sentence and paragraph chronology. It's almost as though you can't quite keep up with your abundance of thoughts and plot points.

Having said that, I found it a compelling read. I think it's hardly fair to judge it at this stage, before you've had time to go over it a few more times. Read it out loud to yourself, several times, slowly, and the little errors will jump out at you.

I have no doubt that this novel will end up being something very special, and I wish you all the luck in your journey to publication.

Backed.

Sheila Mary Taylor (Pinpoint)

hot lips wrote 772 days ago

I only read chapter one, I found it well written charming and mysterious enough to keep me fully engaged, why did the doctor say, 'bring her up as one of your own'? Backed with pleasure.
BADD

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