Of Madness and Folly

Excellent read!

Great observation of human nature, humorous and oh, such a true story! Growing up is more than simply an adjustment. Growing up is a never ending quest.

My complements!

Backed with true pleasure.

Johanna Kern
Master and the Green-Eyed Hope

This is a nice, easy to read book, it's got that familiar feel to it, kind of like you're talking to a friend. I really like the way you write. It felt real, like it could have happened to anyone I know. I think you've done a wonderful job with this and it's going to resonate well with your target audience. Who hasn't felt like your main character at one point? I know I have, which is probably why I liked this so much.

Missy
Mark of Eternity

Wow - you are one gifted narrator! So well written and polished and down to earth! The story doesn't need ghosts or vampires but rather is driven by realistic settings and thoughts! BACKED with pleasure - this will do well here!

Liz
The Cheech Room

Hi again Sean,

SImply Fantastic!

you won't believe this - I 've just finished reading all the six chapters. I wish you had uploaded more. I really do hope you got back at Jonah in the end.

The writing is smooth and the conversations so natural and the whole story hilarious from beginning till the end of the sixth chapter. Being the optimist always, I hope your parents didn't get a divorce(though joint custody hints otherwise). Of Madness and Folly makes a wonderful and refreshing read besides bringing a breath of fresh air to the literary world.

Backed and rated 6 golden stars with best compliments from

Shweta
My Dogs & Me : )))

Hi Sean,

I've just begun reading your book and the laughter is already in by the 8th line and I haven't stopped laughing ever since. I just hope my neighbours don't think that I've gone crazy : )! Besides it also reminded me of my own childhood antics. I thought I'd better drop you a line or two to tell you how hilarious it is(and also before I'm glued to it). Very rarely I'm interested in reading books and I can tell you Of Madness and Folly is the type of story that I can't put down till I've finished reading it. Now am going back to read it but I shall leave another comment once I've finished this great book!

Shweta,
My Dogs & Me : )))

Crisp writing and you capture the mischief of the children well. The atmosphere is growing and dialogue is quite good. I'll continue to read but highly starred and I'll be opening WL and shelf soon enough.--JL "The Devil Of Black Bayou"

Sean,
I just finished reading the 6 chapters you posted, and now I'm here to comment. Remember the following is only my opinion. Take what you want and pitch the rest.
First I'll break ti down by chapter.

Ch 1
Don't be hating on pickles! LOL! Great start and a fun humorous pun.
200 rolls of toilet paper! Holy cow! That's great.
Fun beginning.

Ch 2
There were a couple of comma issues that I noticed, place where you left out the comma. Oh, my gosh Peter... and The next time you talk to me that way,... (Sorry, the grammar geek in me sometimes cannot be silenced!)

I love the character of the mom. She reminds me of, me.

Ch 3
In your speech tag, said but didn't move, I think you could cut out the said- change it to he didn't move. Thanks strictly a matter of opinion.

The sentence Chris didn't go... is a compound sentence, and the comma is missing.

Ch. 4
Oh, no! Not flaming poo! I laughed out loud at the one.

Ch. 5
Peter's reaction to the sermon was great. It was genuine sounding and age appropriate.

Ch. 6
There were more complex sentences in this chapter that didn't have the compound sentences.
I loved the comparison of Peter headed to the principal's office as a sheep to the slaughter.

Overall:
This is a really fun start to a novel. Kids and adults will be able to relate to it, and especially Peter's character. I'm really glad I don't have to pay Peter's medical bills! By the time I read the second chapter, I was ready to purchase it. My students would love this. Let me know WHEN it becomes available! I'm backing this one!


Thanks,
Ms. J- Lord of All

You are a wonderful storyteller. It flows smoothly and keeps you reading. I loved the humorous bits! Your work is also (as far as I saw) error free, which is great.
I think your long pitch is fantastic!
I loved the story and I believe this has great potential.

Highly starred!
Best of luck
Tania Johansson
Book of Remembrance

Hi Sean,
Great title.
lovely flow to your writing, good sense of character coming through the first person narrative. Nice first scene with the toilet paper, sets the tone for the rest of the book. Not much telling and a lot of showing, fabulous. Will highly star.
All the best,
Sharda.

As promised –
I read the first few gripped chapters. What a fantastic, engrossing read.
The story is very well crafted and the characters are very believable and likeable.
I have added 5***** -

Great book

Jimmy Threepwood and the Veil of Darkness

Not a fan of YA, but I was *hugely* entertained reading this. Maybe the Lit Fic was a contributing factor. You have a winning way with prose and dialogue. A pleasure to rate and back.

I am not really a fan of YA novels but your pitch intrigued me. The first chapter where the boys get up to mischief at the mansion is great and had me laughing out loud. It's the sort of thing I would have done at that age, given the chance! Your writing style is very good, and very easy to read. The chase through the woods was wonderfully descriptive and had me wincing at Peter's wounds. Well done and six stars.

Kim (Pain)

I read the first two chapters, and find I really like this! You are a good writer for YA. I will have to find room on my shelf for this one, and soon!
For now? Highly starred and watchlisted.
Georgia
The Woman From E.A.R.L.

Aww those girls in Ch 3 are just like Tanya and her friends in 'The show is on" you're a good writer and funny too

Really good stuff, Sean. On my shelf. I normally shy away from YA fiction but this feels much more than just a novel for teens. The prose is slick and pacy and full of lots of subtle, wryly comic observations and thought processes (loved the whole 'plan becomes a pickle' riff!) There's an engaging warmth and honesty to the narrative which really appeals and helps to make the novel a fully immersive, almost transporting experience. Clever stuff.

The dialogue feels real and helps both to flesh out the various characters and add good pace to the narrative. The exchanges are also very funny in places but the humour definitely feels character-driven and appropriate to the age/mindset of the players. To be honest, I have no idea where the story is going but, at this stage, I'm just enjoying the ride!!

Thanks and best of luck. A

Sean,

I think you have achieved a cracking good read, here. It is both intimate and personal yet at the same time universal in its themes and concerns. What I applaud most about your style is your ability to draw the reader in but simultaneously make them feel as though they are eavesdropping on something very privileged; as though they are sharing the secret life of a boy at a turning point in his life.

Your dialogue throughout is poignant and impeccably observed with the subtle nuance of childhood emerging into adolescence. I thought it amusing that the main character’s idea of an expletive was “holy smokes”. For some reason this made him seem even more real to me, rather than falling back on the more obvious choice of swear words.

You managed to capture, too, that incredible self-consciousness that we all feel at a certain age; when small things hold such mighty significance, and conversational gambits with the opposite sex seem to be a case of all-or-nothing. Too right, also, that Peter’s sense of revenge is motivated by the spoilt opportunity he suffers with Maddie. Who hasn’t, in their youth, felt the misguided but chivalrous need to impress the object of their affection, and redeem themselves from the alternative label of “dork”…?

One of the things I most enjoyed was the dynamic between the two brothers. At once loving and yet struggling to emerge as independent people, I really felt Jamie’s subliminal need to protect his brother from the news of their parent’s divorce, even while he attempts to pass it off as no big deal.

In terms of a market for this book, I think it definitely belongs quite firmly in the YA genre. I just think that demographic would “get it” in the same way that they get “Diary of a Wimpy Kid”, or the way, when I was younger I “got” The Wonder Years, or My So Called Life.

My only concern, and I could be totally wrong, is that at the moment, your MS is competing in an incredibly overcrowded genre. Especially with market forces as they are, even superb writing from debut novelists is finding it hard to push forward. The resonance of your story is also, I fear, what may ultimately be its fatal flaw; it is almost too generic to rise above the other voices crowding for attention in the YA marketplace.

Whilst not wishing at all to influence your authorial intent, I wondered if you had thought of making the plot slightly less predictable? The love/hate sibling relationship, the parents who are divorcing, the joint custody, the pretty girl who doesn’t really know the MC’s alive; all of these tropes are now somehow too familiar to offer the potential for innovative drama. I would have liked, for example, to have seen more of Maddie earlier on, and for her, like your choice of cuss word, not to have been such a stereotypical example. Would it be funnier, perhaps, if Peter actually fantasised about a girl it was EMBARRASSING to fantasise about and then translated this affection to Maddie in an attempt to fit in? One of the things I have learned in my writing is not to go with the first idea that comes to you as that is usually the most obvious and well-worn. Much better to have a selection of ideas and, even then, to twist the one you choose as much as you can to minimise its predictability.

Of course, it’s hard to judge from the opening chapters and indeed, you may have something up your sleeve that will surprise us all. I hope so. Your writing is incredibly polished and worthy of attention.

May I suggest that you take a look at the excellent “I Am The Messenger” by Markus Zusack. Written for the YA market, it is absolutely fantastic in the way that it deals, like you, with the intricacies and pitfalls of younger life, but has the most brilliant literary devices and narrative turns, as well as a rather cool dog called “The Doorman”.

Wishing you all the very best with your book,

Wiz
A Small Death
http://www.authonomy.com/books/38849/a-small-death/

i really like your first chapter- it really captured my attention and made me want to keep reading. youve got a perfect balance between description and dialogue. one thing i wasnt fan of was the repitition from your pitch to the beginning of your novel. i liked it, just not that you repeated it twice. another thing i think your book would benefit from is using more contractions while theyre speaking, for example, theyre to they are. overall, enjoyable read and rated highly.
i wish you the very best of luck with this,

melissa :)
Gut Instincts

I love this! I really like the character Milton for some reason. I love the dialogue especially the opening paragraph. It's genius and sounds exactly like the thoughts of a ninth grader. The prank scene was completely perfect. I could imagine everything that was happening in my head which is awesome. I honestly think this is perfect writing! Best of luck!:)

Very clear, entertaining writing. Dialogue between the boys and their parents is very realistic. Nice work. Can ths published under YA. Dina

Hi Sean-Read the 1st chapter will read more later this week. Very exciting opening scene as the kids run away after teepeeing the rich side of town. Brings me back...So far so good! Realistic dialogue.
Dina of Halo of the Damned and The Last Degree

This was a really amusing read. A well crafted MS.
I imagined the boys to be early teens, when they did the toilet roll scene.
Reminded me of the time, in my own teens, when we raided an orchard.
Dialogue, well thought out.
Discriptive narrative, wonderfully engaging.
I felt drawn along in the boys escapades.
Most people would relate to this story.
Care free childhood days, suits all ages.

‘Before the woods and the blood . . .” What a great start. I can only name a handful of beginnings that have a great first sentence that hooks me right from the start.

I liked how they decided to toilet paper the Oakwood Mansion because they were rich and Milton thought they were stuck-up. When he said that, I was dying. The idea of the toilet paper vandalize was good because every teenager can relate to that. The second I read it I remembered the time I had done it. It was only once but I recalled it quite clearly. So everything that they went through I was like yup that’s what happened to me and my friends.

‘poop’ replace with ‘crap’ Poop doesn’t seem like a word a high school teenager (if that’s what level they are at) would use. Well, maybe not. Just a thought.

I like how I wasn’t able to guess the story of the first chapter by the first sentence. I was thinking a prison escape or a murderer running from the law or a bad against evil chase. But I was wrong and happy you didn’t do any of those and kept it down to earth. The realism is what made it great. That and how I was able to connect to the characters and the scene. You have very easy to read writing and a talent for knowing when you have done enough and not go to the extreme. 6 stars for the ability to let the reader connect the second we meet him. No many stories I have read on here have done that. Sure it sounds easy but it’s very difficult. One thing I don’t understand is why your book is not in the top 100. It definitely deserves to be there with all the mediocre stuff I have seen so far.

I read through your first chapter. First off, I love the cover! After reading your pitch, I'm wondering what your thoughts are on labeling this Young Author? If it is "through the eyes of a child", I could see children(depending on if you tone down some of the language) could really enjoy this. If interested there's a great group called "The really new and fresh YA reading group" you may enjoy. I've had some really quality feedback from them. I am giving you high stars for this and will be putting you on my watch list. Good luck with your book!

Best,

Ashley
'Maddy Hatfield and the Magic Locket'

Hi, Sean! Thanks for backing my book. I am sorry I’ve taken so long to notice it. I am just getting used to the way things work around here.

I love your opening paragraph!

Is this a good time to tell you that when two boys in my grade tee-pee’d my house, my mother went out there and brought the unfurled rolls into the house for our use. I am not joking.

“…every man always faired better than myself….” You want fared.

If Maddie will be important to the plot, it would be nice if we heard about her earlier. Perhaps our narrator might wonder what she’s doing as he and his friends begin tee-peeing……

I’m very interested as I’m reading along. I like Peter and want to know what will happen with him.

I think tee pee-ing might be spelled teepeeing. Or TP’ing. Well, crap; I don’t know how it’s spelled.

“I won’t go so long so you don’t miss any of the Packer game…” I think you can take out the ‘don’t’

“pealed the photo from my right shoe… He actually peeled it.

You do a good job of writing funny narration. Keep it up.

Normally I find dozens of errors; in your writing I found very few. You also convey your meaning well. I am very curious to know how Peter handles his visit with the Principal and his parents impending divorce.
Good work!

~Audrey

I read your first two chapters.

General comments: A gripping start. An appealing main character. Vivid imagery. Terrific tension. Fast pacing.
Specific comment on the first chapter:
1) Excellent opening line.

Specific comments on the second chapter:
1) 'My arms and legs were burning' is telling. Consider describing the burn in his arms so vividly the reader will experience it along with Peter. When you do this, the reader will be thrust deeper into the scene.
2) 'No way my parents let me go if they knew I ... ' Insert 'would' before 'let.'
3) 'It felt terrible but relieved my anger all at once.' Try to avoid using the word 'felt.' Just describe his terrible feelings so realistically the reader will experience them along with Peter. By doing this, you pull the reader deeper into your story.
4) " ... and call the Bears' coach an Asshole." No need to capitalize 'Asshole.' It's a common noun and should be lowercase.
5) Excellent end of chapter hook. Who wouldn't turn the page after reading that line?

I hope this critique helps you further polish your all important opening chapters. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Would you please take a look at "Savannah Fire" and, if it's worthy, keep it in mind when you next reshuffle your bookshelf?

Have a sensational day.

Al

Hi Sean,

Vibrant writing. I like the fresh voice, tight prose and fast pace. One just races through the chapters. keep it that way.
A few cliches to be avoided (like...Then it happened)
New words and phrases are like the cool breeze that enlivens the readers.
If you post more, I shall read more.
For now I have starred the book and placed it on my WL
I thank you for backing my Expiry Date, and I am looking for a slot on my shelf to put your work on it. hopefully very soon.
I'm sure Of Madness and Folly deserves to be in the top 100, which soon it will.
And eventually you will be a published author. all the best for that

Jay Adiyarath

Hi Sean,

It's a difficult task getting to write a book with a young hero who is growing up in a complicated world. The narration is forthcoming with little fantasy and more reality. The psychology of a youngster is tricky and you have managed to lend credence to it, which is quite a feat. Greta start and natural pace makes it a gripping read and I'm sure the book will climb steadily up the charts.
For my part, I have starred it and placed it for the moment on the WL for lack of space on my desk.
Soon to be shelved.

all the best

Jay Adiyarath
EXPIRY DATE

What a great first chapter! And for me, the first chapter has always been the toughest. But you nailed it. You established a sense of place. You introduced two cute, lovable characters to root for. And you proved that you're a natural born storyteller--one who we feel sure will take us on a rollicking good ride. Funny. Smart. And Superb. This is an excellent read. Highly rated for now (Yeah, six.) And watchlisted. Will back when I get a free space. THANKS! JKinkade ----The Zero Line -----

Hello Sean,

I've managed to get round to reading this. I read the first few chapters and I've got to say, I really like your writing style. I immediately get the impression that it's written by someone quite young, so there was no question as to how old your protagonist might be. The entire thing was concise, easy to read and the pacing nicely quick, which made me whizz through with no problems, in the same way the Harry Potter books did.

You have a great hook at the start to pull the readers in and I think you show the characters really well, especially with Milton. His judgemental attitude and jealousy should have came across as dislikable, but he didn't and I think it's because his dislike of stuck-up snobs is something we can all relate to. The dialogue is another strong point because it comes across natural and realisitic, so kudos!

I also enjoyed reading chapter 3 as it's something I can relate to - not having any direction, questioning your choices, having to go back to education. I think you really flesh out the protagonist's character here.

I've high rated your book, and I wish you all the best with this

Hemisha

Hi Sean,

This was so vivid it felt like a memoir. Are you sure it's fiction?

You do a great job of getting into the teenagers' heads. I could just see them, creeping about the mansion.
I do think there's a bit of overwriting. The description of the castle, the actions taken to get the toilet paper on the trees, etc. could be pared down a bit.
Well starred, good luck, and thanks again for backing Animal Cracker.
Best,
Andi

Sean,
I was more than happy to back this and will re-shelve you again when I have some space.
The thing that really stands out here is that this is easy to read. It isn’t perfect but you’ve obviously put a lot into the writing and generally the reader has an uninterrupted ride.
I like the characterisations – as Pete below mentioned they are short, clear and too the point.
Equally you handle action well, choosing not to throw events away in snappy little shots but confidently stick with a believable unfolding at a leisurely pace. (Although having said that, after two chapters you might want to rethink saying ‘my story begins here – it might leave readers wondering why they’d read the first thirty or so pages.).
Dialogue is a strong point, laid back and understated.
I’m sure there’s a market for this somewhere although no doubt agents and some readers will push you for more even action. Good luck with it though. It’s a nicely written, wholly entertaining piece.
Geoff.
Gefordson
Nothing you can do.
PS. It might be worth putting a name to your narrator in the opening paragraphs. It’s an easy way to hook the reader into an emotional attachment.

I am suprised this is not on store shelves. this is a funny, true-to-life story. your writing ability is exceptional and you can feel for each of the characters. enjoyed to the fullest and backed.

Hi Sean,

sorry it took me a few days to get to you. I've been swamped lately. :(

I'll comment as I read, since I find that the easiest way to keep track. Please don't be offended by any suggestions. After all, they're only my thoughts. You can always just ignore me if you think I'm wrong or stupid. ;)

Chapter 1: Vandalism. a nice start ;). I like the easy conversational style. The way you address the reader's unusual. It's a risky strategy, as such a technique can pull readers out of the story, but I think it works well here.

I like your dialogue. It's sharp and bounces from speaker to speaker quickly. It sounds real. Given what came before, there's 1 line that jars for me, though : "I just think you're being a little harsh." That 1 line sounds overly formal and stiff to me. is there any way you could loosen the line up so it fits in with the rest of your great dialogue?

I like the fact they nearly got scared off by a flag. That doesn't bode well for their level of grit. Credit where credit's due, though. They pull off a toilet papering of epic proportions. The weeping willow analogy fits v well.

Then things go wrong. Fire. Uh oh. They wisely leg it. ;)

1 tiny suggestion here. I think it's generally best to avoid forms of start/begin when describing actions because very few actions start. They just happen. eg I think "As I began running..." would read better and clearer as just "As I ran...."

Reading on. I bet he's worried now. will the cops get him? will he escape?

tiny nitpick here. Look out for jarring repetitions such as the 2 instances of "only" in 1 sentence.

Good point about cops yelling "stop". It is a bt pointless. Of course the brothers do the logical thing and leg it.

1 small thing. If possible, I think it's best to avoid "filtering" constructions like felt/saw/heard because they place the character between the reader and the action . eg "I heard footsteps to the left of me..." is you telling the reader about a character hearing something. "Footsteps pounded to the left of me..." should let the reader experience the sound alongside the character. I think that version would be more involving.

Reading on... Brilliant. It looks like they were running pointlessly the while time. All those cuts and all the blood was for nothing.

Chapter 2: Good way of summing up personalities by a few simple activities. It's efficient and effective. + it gives us a view into his mindset. Sounds like he's a bit of a fish out of water. I like the Chinese whispers dating technique too ;) .

Awkward conversation with the cowgirl. you're good at using dialogue. I can almost sense him squirming inside.

I feel sorry for him when he's "kidnapped". This kid really is a hapless character. I sympathise with him and want to see him come out on top. He doesn't deserve all this crap. I wonder what'll happen when they take him out of the trunk...

Ominous. lots of people. There's obviously a premeditated plan here. Embarrassing photo, but I'd honestly expeected far worse would happen to him. I thought it'd be violence.

Chapter 3: OK now we're going into adulthood. I'm surprised. I thought this story would chronicle his school life. Hmmm it looks like the 1st 2 chapters have been to make to feel v sorry for this guy. well, it worked. I'm on his side.

And he's in the newspaper business. Hmmm I bet there are plenty of things that can and will go wrong there. ;)

STD = Best frat initials ever ;). I'm not sure jumping back in time's a good idea, though. Until now, I think this has flowed v well. Taking a step back slows the momentum of the forward story.

I'm with him on the idea choosing a career so early is bonkers. I always thought that. Especially since at that point in your life, all you've had is people telling you what to do. suddenly, out of nowhere, people are demanding you decide what to do with your life. Grrr I think I'm having flashbacks. :(

By the last section, it looks like he's getting itchy feet. Good. I want to see him escape a potential life of boredom.I want to read on and see his adventures. :)

OK I'll stop reading and sum up now because I don't want to leave a huuugggeee comment and annoy you. I did enjoy your book. There's a relaxed, easy style to your writing and the dialogue's sharp and witty. It's v readable. The main charater's mishaps are fun, and I enjoyed seeing him suffer, if I'm honest.

Normally, I'd suggest telling less and showing more would make for a more involving story. But I suspect you know the technique and have made a conscious choice to write this book the way you have. The most important thing is, your story works. The only thing that particularly bothered me was the jumping around in time. In every other way, your story flowed well. I think the jumping around slowed things down.

Anyway, I've rated this highly. I hope you manage to find an agent/publisher as I'd love to read the whole book some day. ;)

Best of luck with it,

Pete

Sean,


I started reading your Opus and thought I would give you my cent and half:

The first thing that jumps here is the style.

There are three devices working for you:

First, the use of a single image to open a mind picture, thus speeding the plot.

Second, throwing a confetti like spur of opinions that add idiosyncrasy to your character.
This however, works as long as you don't insert it in a moment of tension.
During that, you should tone it down, and let description do it's work.

Third, the dialogue is punchy, with plenty of lingo thrown here and there

.....and that mix is what makes your narrative worth reading

Some of my favorites:

"pre-vandalization scout"

"weeping willows of tepee"

"every man feared better than the self"

"This time around..."
here you have the camera's eye working for you
what I mean is you have a blow by blow sequence from the character's perspective that place the reader in the eye of the character
do more of that
why?
because you audience, after playing a million videos is used to the camera eye

Some Minor/Minorest/Minormost points:

"It was a work of art - a masterpiece"
I think editorializing your own work is unnecessary.

"anytime....."
again you are preventing the momentum build up by editorializing
let your description do the talking

"First came the smoke.....
stay there longer, using description, rather than editorializing....
Why?.
Because when the writer labels an emotion, the reader reads ...the label
when he describes...the reader feels

Let me know if that helps,

Overall, wonderful

david

I read a couple of chapters and dipped into a few more. It is well and engagingly written. I'm glad you didn't try and make it more 'realistic' by heavily sprinkling the dialogue with cursing, even when the lads are bolting from the scene of their crime early on. For me, that is always off-putting.
The tiniest typo, 'usually faired better' should be 'fared.' Ch 1.
Well done and to be backed, Marj.
PS: I like your book-cover.

Sean -

Of Madness and Folly - I don't think I'll ever forget the surreally attired trees, toilet-paper willows, and the events in dark wood. The wonderful humour is a great lead into the complexities fo come. A hero who touches something in all of us and is easy to relate to. I returned to give the story a handful of stars, and to thank you for your support, Pia

Sean,
Such a delightful read with the right balance of wit. I loved the father and son interchange at The Breakfast Barrell. Extremely refreshing all round. Thank you for uploading your work here. 6 stars! WL'd with intent.
Cheers!
JB Campbell (Walk to Paradise Garden)

An excellent read. On my shelf.

I found myself nodding my head in agreement to much of this (with a silly smile pasted on my face)

I enjoyed the read very much. Your writing is smooth, and the dialog keeps it real.

I think you've tapped into a universal experience here. The whole, "I have no idea what I'm going to do with the rest of my life, so I'll do nothing for as long as I can get away with it" mentality. It's been 30 years since I had to deal with that, but my son is definitely going through the same struggle right now.

I think that is what makes it so appealing to me. The theme is universal, the MC is someone we can sympathize with, and the whole thing is written with wry, self-depreciating humor.

There's been too many angry, rebellious "slacker with an attitude" books. Thank you for writing something for the rest of us.

Bob (Who still thinks that a whole day with absolutely nothing on the agenda, is the best thing ever :-)

Read your first three chapters and loved it. You achieve a nice flow in your narrative, the events and characters come alive. In the flashbacks, you found the perfect balance between painful humiliations of youth and hilarious nostalgia. I'm looking forward to reading the rest and am happy to back this.

Whilst this has echoes of' ' The Chatcher in the Rye as the story is very introspective, and you have a good way with words. I found nothing to critique in the writing except to say it is a little dull.
I appreciate that this is a very American coming of age story and one that I had some problems relating to the events and colours you depict. Moreover, being a an English old fart. I am not your target audience.
Perhaps it is because it is really quite slow and insightful with little happening at the start of the chapters.

I read chapters 1,10 & 14 and at the end of these, I felt myself saying so what. I did not come to care enough to read on to find out what happens to your MC.
As you will appreciate this is not for me , sorry and I wish you well with the book. Ray Jones.(Murder in Beer.)

An amusing story, well written, easy to read but also observant of people and I think this should do well. Have given you four stars. Lots of luck with it. Lorri

You grabbed my attention in your first chapter - TP-ing houses is something my brother used to do. You kept me guess as it rolled along at a good pace...

Very well written and a faithful reportage of youth and its problems. The writing is fluent, the narrative voice strong and we are with our young hero every inch of the way. When he plunges into the thorny thicket we wince. When he sadly says 'They laughed and said, 'Dance, Monkey' and I danced,' we wince again,
The dialogue is natural and the descriptions fitting. If I have a reservation it is that these types of coming of age novels are out there in abundance and although your 'voice' is fresh I wonder if it will be sufficient to distinguish it from the others. I have watchlisted and heavily starred and look forward to following your progress with interest. Jaye

Sean,
Of Madness and Folly is so believable that I had to check and make sure it was fiction. This is a very entertaining story and the narrator seems very real. Backed with six stars.

Walden Carrington
Titanic: Rose Dawson's Story

I enjoyed your work.

Very readable Sean. Always wanting to know what will happen next. regards David

Sean,
Have finished the 16
beautifully captures the awkwardness of all the situations. The dialogue and flash backs bring the story so far together in a unique way.
Have enjoyed it Thanks Sean
:)
Diane

Sean,
in the middle of reading up to chap 6 so far! Can i just say did you have a spy cam on my childhood? Our snow project was to build a life size T Rex or Brontosaurus. And we had a local golf course we would go sleding on...3 kids one dad and one dog! Fun fun fun. Lots of flying through the air as well. ....
looking forward t reading more
:)
Diane

What a good start! Bloody kids! Best of luck with this. Happy to back it. Ceeds

Hi Sean

I enjoyed this. I like the straightforward prose style and the natural tales that the MC narrates, so redolent of youth and growing up, a story that will find many a sympathetic reader. Backed (you'll see it tomorrow).

Nicole
Chosen

I find your narration abilities profound. When the reader gets into your story they have to make an effort to stop reading. Your characters are believable and have individual personalities. I like that you haven't gone overboard uses descriptive phrases. My only small critique would be that I have never heard any young man use the word 'profusely.' Otherwise, I thought it was entertaining and well written. Best of luck with you book. Mariah

Of Madness and Folly takes us into a boyish tumble , with entertaining, humerous and fast-paced snippets of life from early adolescence to early adulthood. The POV is first person, a rather superficial young man who takes life as it comes, absorbed in living for the moment, perhaps in a rather superficial way. Then the crunch comes. Will we see the 'growing up' of the main character or something else? How will he deal with real pain? This looks set to be a coming-of-emotional-age drama, with grief as an important theme. It will be interesting to see how Sean Lamb portrays the change in mood and pace.

Sean Lamb balances all the elements of good writing in these first chapters, creating a story that is as real as its characters. Can he sustain this into the next stage of the book?