SEVERED THREADS

I liked your pitch so I backed your book - perhaps you could have a look at my books - good luck !

This is brilliantly written, that's the first thing you notice. It's concise, to the point and very easy to become absorbed in. With compelling characters and an excellent descriptive style this is wonderfully promising.

Backed with pleasure.
Abi xxx

This is very fluid and easy to read...a bit like being underwater. You've obviously been there and done that...if not, then you're an even better writer than the story suggests...very convincing indeed. There aren't that many good reads like this around...happy to back
Stewart

Extremely well written excitement. Some readers might not know what a BC vest is? Backed. Chuck (Paperboy Adventures)

Poor Sam! A good first chapter with plenty of action and the reader really feels for Jordan. The descriptions are good and the premise interesting. This is well written and deserves to go far.

Backed,

Lisa

Great opening. Your descriptions are painted very well and I could see the ocean around me. The action starts fast and even though advertised as 'romance' I found myself wanting to continue the read! This reminds me of the opening to a Bond story. Great hook at the end of chapter one as well!
The only nit-pick I might have found is about halfway through chapter 1, you said "He took over breathing into Sam's gapping mouth"
Should it be gaping? Just checking.

Anyway, this is backed :)
Dan
Demons and Other Inconveniences

This is my kind of story! Your pitch promises a wonderful adventure, full of action, romance and lots of twists and turns -- and your chapters do not disappoint. Your imagery is vivid and the dialogue natural. I could easily see this as a movie. This is a winner. I'm happy to back it.

Richard Bard
BRAINRUSH (2010 ABNA Quarter-Finalist)

Promise to get to everyone on my list as soon as I can - especially all my "backers"... working on a screenplay for the Hallmark Channel, my new ms, and promoting my debut novel, Flaherty's Crossing which was released in February. You might say I have my hands full so please be patient ... :P

Hi Kaylin, this is a really good read. I love the fact that it is two genre's for the price of one so t speak!! Romance and a thriller, love the settings too.

An exciting read in which the pitches promise a lot of twists and turns along the way.
This is also exceptionally well written and I could not find any nits!!

Happily shelved
Melxx
Impeding Justice

I absolutely love the cover for a start and the opening is incredible. The writing is of a quality I haven't seen before, completely flawless and the descriptions excellent, can't get over how good this is, definitely like reading a published novel. Excellent, backed immediately.

Sandie
The Crown of Crysaldor

Film! Yes definitely a film! Exciting and dramatic. Best of luck with this Kaylin. Mariecapri (Cosmic Linx)

Knowing nothing of diving, I was very taken with the start of this story. The way it was so vividly told and telling some of the basics of diving. I am backing this and ask you to look at my story, Three Stayed Home a WW2 adventure and love story which I hope you like. JohnJ

Romance and thrills - makes for a great read. It kept me intrigued, and underwater diving is not something I've even tried. The dialogue is powerful and realistic. Backed.

Considered everyone's comments and ended up changing my Prologue to Chapter One. :D

Hi Kaylin, Even though I love to read about underwater diving, I’m sure this is an absorbing read for a large audience. Jordan's POV as Sam fails in the water feels so convincing. And Rachel at the museum is also, her perspective unrelentingly at business and needing recovery. Good word choices – “her anger ripened” and the style is excellent. The prospect of exploring a wreck makes this a hard-to-put-down story. A pleasure to shelve – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

This is a very well written book full of excitement and also full of romance. Your theme, searching for sunken treasure ships, is enough in itself to transport us to the imaginary world of pieces of eight, danger and enchantment. Your opening, with Sam's death while diving, is fast moving, with the tension building rapidly, and you tell it from Jordan's point of view, so that we feel related to him and full of sympathy for the pain this disaster is causing him. Then you introduce Rachel, and again, by writing from her point of view, you bring us close to her and allow us to understand her emotions. The meeting between Jordan and Rachel, and their conflict in the car park, is gripping and full of sparks and the love / hate attraction which you portray so well. The ship which has been discovered promises more thrills and fast moving action, and you have really hooked us in by both aspects of your story. Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

Awesome read. You've crafted a powerful novel that is intriguing with charcters that engage the reader from the first word. C W

Thanks, JC. Took your advice in regard to my pitch, and added my cover art which should appear after approval. Also realize Prologues aren't traditionally popular, but hope this one sets the tone for this story. :)

Yeah, I can tell you won some awards but you may wanna leave that out of the pitch which seems kinda generic. Good writing though, worthy enough of a SHELVING!

I can your comments on my book when you get a chance. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau Key
Authonomy's #1 rated commentator

If it's true that editors don't like prologues, you could easily rename yours ch1 since the story follows from it. You know more of that than I do, however, and personally I wouldn't change anything. One can see you're a professional, so no more cheeky suggestions. Just backed. Lynn

Want to thank everyone for their great comments. If you're interested, I have another book that just came out on Amazon.com titled Flaherty's Crossing. It's a different kind of story but seems to be getting lots of attention. :)

Kaylin

Hi Kaylin,

Exquisite writing. The words just seem to flow so naturally. I'll have to remind myself to come back here later to continue this story.

Backed with pleasure!
Tom

This is a good book. I don't know much about diving - but that's a big reason I liked this. It's not only a good thriller/mystery but it opened up my vision to this other world. Good going. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Hello Kaylin,
Chapters 1 and 2 are well crafted. A good balance of strong dialogue and description. The prologue is a little dense and almost all agents hate prologues. Does your story start there if so change the title of the prologue to Chapter 1, if not, can that information be placed later in the book? Good read glad to have backed.
Daniel “Storykeeper”

Hmmm... This has an adventurous feel to it. Indy and Marion, Joan Wilder and Jack Colton. Mickey and Minnie!
Very easy read and well structured. I just hope Rachel is tougher than she starts out to be. I have a feeling she'll be fine.

Shelved
Dan
Demons and Other Inconveniences

Very good read... Backed !

I actually enjoyed the prologue and then thought the four years down the line worked well. Both Rachel and Jordan are well built characters and the storyline flows ok. This is well written and has potential.
Backed,

Lisa

Great tension in chapter one, which leads well into chapter two, where the dialogue flows for me. Rachel and Jordan are believable characters and the story seems to come to life more. Enjoyed up to now and hope to read more.
Very best of luck with this
Hatts xx

Wow you really have a gift for pulling the reader right into the story. Well crafted and compeling -I'd buy this book! BACKED with pleasure.

Liz
The Cheech Room

All well written, but the prologue lacks voice, there's quite
a lot of exposition and it's quite wordy and slow.

Page two is immediate, and very engaging. I do wonder if
the prologue content couldn't be inserted later in the book.
Once the story starts, the voice kicks in at once, and with
real freshness and pace.