Hope

An emotional, engaging, thought provoking historical with well-crafted characters. Powerful imagery. Intense, evocative narrative. Sharp dialogue. Good hooks. Spot on storytelling. Brilliant, moving writing. A compelling read. Backed.

I feel the opening chapter drags a bit but the content cannot be discounted...it's powerful and has an authenticity about it that can be seen in WW2 newsreel films of that dreadful time...you've made a bold statement here
Cheers
Stewart

There are countless books published about the horrors of the concentation camps but I can't think of one which looks out of the eyes of those forced into Daniel's role. Your writing has the power the subject deserves. You've got right inside the man and taken us with you. I think this should rise to the top and go on to make a public impact.
Backed in certainty this will do very well.
Robert Davidson
THE TUZLA RUN

A story the world needs to hear - may it never be allowed to happen again. Compelling, moving and beautifully written. Delighted to back it. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

Dear Matthew, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed my memoir book, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not." I really appreciate it. :) You'd make me the happiest person in the world if you'd back my other book, "Tell Me True Loves Stories." :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. I backed this book 121 days ago & your revised version 2 hours ago. :)

Hope, you have created a work that we should all appreciate for reminding us of these horrors. We must never forget and you serve humanity by writing this. Blees you for doing so. Backed. Gordon, The Harpist of Madrid

Hope
It's always sad to read about war
Backed
Lenny Harry
(Like a dot on the horizon)

Beautiful cover page. A well written but sad story.
Backed with pleasure.
Well done.

Dawn,
My Friends and Me / Sammy and the Wise Willow

Clear visual description of one of the most tragic and shameful events in human history. The story draws us along, like one of the victims in your book. It is difficult to read, and difficult not to read. Well done!
Backed

Craig Ellis
The Sun and the Saber

Hi Matthew, Well-imagined. You’ve penetrated to the dearth of this man’s consciousness and conveyed the effects of the horror he has been through. The sections on hope and soul, although they pervade, show the despondency the situation entails. The writing holds the attention and maintains the mood and setting. Shelved – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

'That purpose killed the man I used to be'. Each line burns out the truth of that terrible past. 'My soul has left me even when I clamped my lips shut to hold it in'. The loss of hope is something almost valuable in the situation, though it is the wage of time and experience that others have yet to earn - if they live long enough. 'I have used all my good minutes'. The contrasts between the almost-dead and the not-yet-dead, 'His desire to live overshadows even my desire to die'. It is with a sad kind of relief that we meet David as he was in earlier times when he had 'dreams too big for that town' and passion for Emily. 'She moved in ways causing entire rooms to disappear'.

Overwhelmingly bleak and beautiful ... backed.

Possible nits: 'Those who still look for hope find it everywhere they look', maybe 'search' instead of the 1st 'look'? 'knowing it[']s coming'. 'than [then] they are fools'. 'most can [no] longer distinguish'. 'knight in shinning [shining] armour'. You might consider trimming and tightening the first chapter slightly; it would still feel relentless, which is what I think is intended. 'causing me to fall ... causing a dangerous'.

A dark tale very well told about a harrowing time in history. The rhythm of your sentences is quite mesmerising.
Jim Darcy
The Firelord's Crown

dyer passions? - not sure what you mean here?

Hi Matthew
Very sad, but a really entertaining read. This is powerful. Your writing has a really strong feel to it, professional and emotional. You certainly have the skill to express your thoughts clearly and cleverly. I liked it.
DP Walker
Five Dares

An interesting account through one of the toughest and darkest times. I would think that that victims of the camps, after being treated like creatures not fit to walk the planet, tortured and starved, would feel their hope dissipated very quickly - so I'd be interest in seeing more chapters up to see how the "hope" theme builds and drives the story.

You get right into it. I get the feel of utter disgust and loss right away.

Backed.
RC Shivers
Peninsula

Excellent book! Love every word of it. Sad and yet gives hope. BACKED

You have balanced the facets of writing with incredible accuracy to produce a believable, detailed and engaging historical fiction. Not only is this entertaining. It's educational and poignant.

Backed with pleasure.
Abi xxx

I think you have captured in a very poignant way quite a story here!
It has a very congruent feel that to me makes this special. I don’t often say this but it is a book I would buy, good luck with it!

Matthew, simple title profound book. I have always steered so far from books regarding this subject in my later years. The suffering being so great by people, all types. I had to read some of your book because you have taken the time and effort and research even though it is fiction. Your research was we done your book well crafted and vivid are your characters and pictures in my mind. CONGRATS on a good read. I cannot profess to have read it all and also it is incomplete. The cover is compelling and of course this is the first thing that would make someone pick it up. The pitch encompassing, and grabbing. BACKED for sure. .If you would review 'The Letter' and give your comments and backing, I would appreciate it.

Denise
The Letter

I agree with the comment by Daydreamer.

I also found the first chapter to long. Long in the part discribing Daniel's emotional pains and the results it had on him. The writing was gripping and I felt I got 'the point' the distraught plight of Daniel. I then began to wonder when the story line would move on. Had I been reading pages I might of flipped a few... Only after reading some of the comments did I go back and read the rest. Then I discovered a very interesting and attention holding book.

Since this is not my usual read, You definitly expressed me. WELL DONE.

odeb

In many ways it's lovely but I still feel very strongly that it would work much better if you make it immediate, do it like this:
I'm forced into a truck, a blood red compartment, rotting wood, cracked paint full of wasted remainders of life like me. (poor attempt, you can do better)
The thoughts can then be given perhaps partly as dialogue to a sentient fellow passenger.
No time for more at present, will try later.
If you could kindly read chs 1 and 3 of Twice Twisted a bloke's view would be very helpful
Thanks
Rosalind

This is a powerful story, powerfully written. In some places there are flaws of presentation, - no spaces between paragraphs, but that is a technical issue when uploading. Everything counts, so it might be worth trying again, but then you might end up with the opposite problem - too much space between paragraphs. Aside from that minor problem, this is a very 'clean' manuscript, - that is, I didn't see any errors of grammar or spelling. Well done. Happy to back, Marj.

Beautiful story. I really enjoy stories about the holocaust--what is more horrific than what took place during that time? The writing is clean, professional, and still simple enough to be accessible to any reader. I'm not a big fan of novels with male Main Characters, but this was still good. I'd probably borrow this book from a friend if it were published.

xBeccaX
The Forever Girl

What you have posted so far is well written and well paced. My only critisism is that I believe you over use the word Nazi in the openning paragraphs - it becomes repatative. Your use of imagery is excellent and your descriptive writing style makes your finely crafted and powerful story a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

This subject has touched my very soul on many occasions when reading both actual accounts and those of Literary Fiction. Yours will list amongst them.
It is a story that must be told again and again - lest we forget.
Backed
all the best
Alice
Interfering Busybody

Further thoughts:- I think you can crack this problem by a) changing the title, which sounds as if it might be a Mills and Boon romance or a non-fiction self-help book. How about, A Faint Hope b) Just put the date at the top of each section, then write it as if just past. Then it will read as immediate and dramatic. I'm thinking particularly of Ch2. Hope this helps. Rosalind x

I think you a very special writer and your first paragraph is superb. After that, I long for all those passages to be written in the 3rd person from the pov of your character, so that the horror can become more immediate than can be believed from a first hand account. It is all excellent stuff but we can't believe he is going through these experiences and simultaneously telling us about them. Ch 2 is rather lovely in many ways but is spoiled by the tense. You've distanced this by not writing it in the recent past rather than from pov of Daniel 23 years later.
Backed - and it is a wonderful first section so hope you can fix this.
Rosalind
Good for Him
Making It

It reads very well and the information contained feels well reserached and authentic. Persoanlly though I found the parts written about his present to be much more enagaging than the exposition about Nazis and the war in general. A lot of that stuff felt familiar, and although there's nothing wrong with it i felt it slowed th epace and took away frpm the tension of the situation he was in currently. A matter of opinion though.

The transitions between his present and his past also felt a bit blended together so I sometimes wasn't sure if he was referring something now or previous. Might just be me though. It did all become clear eventually but something to maybe have a look at.

Overall it's very polished and the flow and pace are very well handled. Backed.

The prose is like velvet, the subject matter like broken glass. This is really well written, Matthew. It reminds me a little of Primo Levy's 'If I Am A Man' and obviously brought to mind many films, such as Shoah. In your long pitch I think there's a word missing in the last sentence or paragraph 2 ...to hope for (which) has taken, and you have one paragraph in the middle of chapter one where you use the verb 'soak' three times - maybe change the middle one to 'oozing'? I only point out these minor things as there's nothing else I can say to make this better than it already is. Brilliant.

It is difficult to write an accurate but entertaining historical piece but you have done so. Your highly descriptive writng style makes your finely crafted, dramatic novel a pleasure to read. Your work is well paced, well written and your use of imagery is excellent. Backed with pleasure.

Cheers,
Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

You bring freshness to an old story with your prose, compelling and true. However there are a couple of mistakes in the pitch - disposing OF countless victims, and in the last line of the second para of the long pitch I think THAT is missing before 'taken it away from him'. Brilliant. Backed. Lynn

Hope
Matthew C. Hahn

Matthew,
Your plot promises a thrilling, chilling story with much drama. This seems like a dark tale. An illuminating dark tale, to be sure. I don't actively like stories/ films about/ surrounding the Holocaust. Yet, they draw me because of the need to understand how man can be so cruel to his fellow man - and perhaps they tend to sway one into accepting the possibility that evil exists, which man or some men are incapable of rejecting. It's a tough topic, isn't it? But it's one that deserves engagement. Your story has such great depth and substance to it - regarding that period in history, but of course, also in relation to your characters. I thought chapter one, The Truck, was a good start and an impressive first chapter. Some distressing details here - "His bones outline the wire frame of a wire pinata, wrapped in one thin layer of paper marche skin.... His hunger has eaten his body away from the inside out." Then, "I do not know where this truck will stop, but I know where we are all going. We are going to our deaths. Of this, I am certain. This certainty has killed us long before the deaths it foreshadowed. This certainty has turned hope into a killer." Historical fiction, but good existential fiction too. YOu write with the air of someone who knows his material well, who knows his characters well even though they are fictitious, and who appears to be, like some of my favourite authors, another of humanity's great seeker. This is a brilliant piece of writing, credible, and intensely moving. I have to read more - but in limited doses, which is not a reflection of your abilities, bu rather, the intensity of the subject matter. This will no doubt be published - I am sure the "right" person will come along when the time is right, spot it, and grab it. (I am not big on giving editorial advice, but comment mainly on the impact the story had on me.)
Best wishes for its success.
Zan

Matthew,

Hope - A haunted life, opening a personal window on horrendeous events that must never be forgotten. This must have been difficult to write. I'd need to read the whole of it to do the book justice. It deserves a good edit. I back it and will leave you a note.

Pia (Course of Mirrors)

Very poignant. I think the narrative is very narrator-centric, and it may give the impression that the narrator is self-centred. More observation of the plight of others, more focus on other characters, will, I think, improve this fascinating work.
Frank

Matthew, your first chapter flows smoothly. It's obvious you have invested time and research in your work.

Backed with pleasure.

Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

Great book, can't wait to see it published.
Dovo

What a compelling read; horrifically sad! I was wondering if a family member went through this?

I wish I had more time to read it fully but it certainly is worthy of a backing

Good Luck
Denise

A very introspective character you have created, with devastating images and moments of wisdom and realization. I was drawn into this, was lulled into the story effortlessly. You have a beautiful style with poetic rhythms and it reads almost musically. It's haunting that Daniel doesn't feel like a man any more, that his hope has turned into something hated and feared. Very touching, very poignant, very disturbing of course. Excellent work, really enjoyed this.
---Mary
The Qualtiies of Wood

Very well done, but horrifying.
Terrifying.
RT

I agree it's a very emotional subject and read, very well done. I wish you all the best with it. Backed. E.Loraine Royal Blood Chronicles book one

Hello Matthew. This is a compelling read. Daniel's character is perfectly portrayed through the emotions he has to deal with on his journey. Very emotional and your style is unique. Backed with pleasure and best of luck with it! mariecapri (Cosmic Linx)

This is a great read I really enjoyed it, cant wait for it to be published!!

Besides a few spelling errors ;) you have great voice and very fluid sentences. You do a great job in the first chapter of revealing to the audience just how changed this character is. My only problem was that it felt like you gave too much away. If the point is to show how Daniel changes in through out the book then never mind. Otherwise, I personally like it when your introduced to a character and don't know exactly who he or she is, revealing a little bit here and a little bit there. Eitherway it's not my place to tell you how your book progresses so I'll leave you with praise. Keep up the good work. Only good can come of it.

I am currently working on a WWII memoir and someone on this site recommended I take a look at this book - so very glad I did -you are a talented writer and I believe this deserves publication! You have a gift for drawing the reader right straight into the story proper without letting go and leaving them breathless! BACKED!

Liz
The Cheech Room

Keep pushing this book! It's a seriously good read and quality piece of writing. Publishers and Agents are notoriously fickle, you just need to hit it to the right person at the right time and you'll be published. It's certainly a book I'd be happy to buy. I genuinely can't think of anything to change. Sorry if that's not helpful but I really hope to see this on a shelf one day!
David
Bailey of the Saints

Backed
Splinker
B.D.S.T.

I can't stress how grateful I am for the comments I have been receiving. I have been trying to get my book recognized for quite some time, but it is usually my age that throws people off. Thank you all for the inspiration. Please keep commenting and help me improve my writing.

I'm not worthy to comment on such as this Mathew.

I realise I've been spoilt in many ways - pampered to the point of over indulgence sometimes - and yet I still look for something better - want more.

You write with style and passion about something the likes of me could never hope to understand.
You write about survival in the midst of unimaginable hopelessness - guilt in the midst of unspeakably guilty acts, and yet you give your character a dignity just by his honest confession.

I don't quite know how you've managed this but you've given such a startling reality to the horrors Daniel sees before him, that it's possible to believe the author has somehow been there himself.

Back with extreme admiration.
James.

"I'm your star?" . . . "You're my star."
Excellent depiction of how the lights went out.
Marianne (Saint Paddy and the Sundial)

You touched my heart with your wonderful prose and heart breaking story. I always find reading about the atrocities of the concentration camps hard to come to terms with. How can human beings treat others like that! Oh don't get me started on that...

Your writing is stunning for one so young, compelling to read.
I wish you every success with this fabulous read.

Melxx
Impeding Justice