I am the President of the United States of America. Elected in a time of worldwide economic upheaval, I promised real change, offering hope to those who had despaired of government, the economy and the future. The first two years of my term were spent stabilizing the economic situation, passing a comprehensive stimulus program, and redefining the role of government in the marketplace, health care, energy, education and welfare. I hoped to complete the most radical transformation of the federal government since Abraham Lincoln.
With indications that the economy had turned the corner, and with my agenda moving forward, I was finally in a position to give other issues the time that they deserved. After summoning the Secretary of Defense and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff to the Oval Office, I informed them of my desire to take a close look at military spending. As the meeting drew to a close, I broached what I expected to be an awkward subject. If I had known where it would lead, I would have thought twice before asking . . . but I still would have asked.
“Gentlemen, I have been in office for two years. During that time there is a subject which we have never discussed and on which I have never been briefed. I want to know if we have any concrete evidence of extraterrestrial life. Have we had actual contact? Do we possess alien technology? Is there a secret alien research facility at Area 51?”
The two men exchanged a quick glance before the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs responded, “Mr. President, surely you don’t believe that tabloid journalism nonsense?”
“General,” I shot back, “if I wanted to dance, my wife would be here instead of you.”
“Mr. President,” broke in the SecDef, “I can assure you that there is no alien research facility at Area 51.”
“That answers one of my questions. What about the others?”
“Mr. President,” the Joint Chiefs said, somewhat stiffly, “if we had any information relative to those questions, and I’m not suggesting that we do, but if we did, it would have the highest possible security classification, and access would be limited to a need-to-know basis.”
“Are you suggesting, General, that if such information exists, the Commander-in-Chief doesn’t have a need to know? Or are you telling me that you don’t know, and therefore can’t answer my questions?” Then turning to the SecDef, “If you two don’t have access to the information I require, then find out who does. I want him here in this office for a briefing next Tuesday morning at 6:30 a.m.” I reached out to shake their hands in a gesture of dismissal, “Gentlemen, I appreciate your efforts to protect the security of our great nation.”
The following Tuesday I entered the Oval Office at 6:35 a.m. It was my practice to come to my office early each morning for a brief quiet time. It was about the only “alone” time that I had in this job, and it provided an opportunity to collect my thoughts and adjust my attitude before going back to the residence for breakfast and then returning to the office for the official beginning of the day. To my surprise, I discovered an Air Force Colonel standing at attention, with no Secret Service agent present. “Who are you, and how did you get in here?”
“I’m Colonel . . . Smith, Mr. President. I was told that you required my presence in this office at 06:30 this morning, Sir.”
It was then that I remembered my conversation with the SecDef and the Joint Chiefs the previous week, and I found myself struggling to control my curiosity. “Well, Colonel Smith, then I presume that you know why you’re here. Please sit down and let’s start with an overview, shall we?”
“Yes, yes, yes and no, Sir,” replied Colonel Smith as we each sat down in one of the comfortably upholstered arm chairs.
“Excuse me?” I replied.
“Sir, last week you asked if we have any concrete evidence of extraterrestrial life, if there has been actual contact, if we possess alien technology and if there is an alien research facility at Area 51. I was simply answering your questions, Sir. And actually there is an Area 51. I can show it to you on a tourist map or on Google Earth. We use it to test new weapons systems, mostly experimental aircraft. But there is no secret extraterrestrial research center there. That rumor was created years ago as cover for the sightings of our top secret aircraft prototypes, and to deflect attention from the real alien research facility, which is called AREA 48.”
“Area 48?” I asked. “Never heard of it. Is it close to Area 51?”
“No Sir, AREA is an acronym for ‘Alien Research, Extraterrestrial Activity’. It has nothing to do with geographical location.”
“I see,” I said, not really sure that I did. “So why the ‘48’?”
“That was for the 48 states,” he replied. “The research center was created in 1947. Alaska and Hawaii didn’t become states until 1959. There were discussions about updating the name to AREA 50, but in January 1960 ‘Area 51’ was mentioned in some official documents about the Groom Lake test site, and the name change was abandoned. Instead it was decided to leak false information and use Area 51 as a red herring. At its inception, AREA 48 was only concerned with alien activity within the United States, but since the early 60s, we have been gathering information on alien activity around the world.”
This was fascinating, but a question occurred to me, “Tell me, who sent you here, the SecDef or the Joint Chiefs?”
“Neither, Sir. And if you will excuse my candor, they are both concerned about the state of your mental health. They asked around, but neither found anyone who took their inquiries seriously. They have been wondering what you will say when no one shows up this morning.”
“Then why are you here?” I asked. “How did you know the questions that I had asked? And why did the SecDef tell me that he knew there was no alien research center at Area 51 if he’s not in the loop on this?”
“Mr. President, let me begin with your last question. The SecDef served for three years at Groom Lake, in what is popularly called ‘Area 51’. His comments were based on his assumption that if there was a secret extraterrestrial research facility within what was already a classified test site, he would have seen some evidence of it. Actually, he wouldn’t have seen any evidence, Sir, but his assumption is still correct. In answer to your second question, the subject that we are discussing is one of our most tightly guarded national secrets. We have ways of knowing who shows interest or makes inquiries. As for the first question, I am here because you are the President and my Commander-in-Chief, and you ordered me to be here this morning. Our agency may be totally outside the normal chain of command, but we are loyal, patriotic Americans, Sir.”
“If your agency is such a black hole, what is the source of your funding? $4,000 hammers? $2,000 toilets?”
“No Sir, those fund another agency. We own a number of companies that hold some rather lucrative patents based on the reverse engineering of alien technology that we have done over the years. We are totally self-funded, with a healthy annual surplus.”
“It’s nice to learn that something in government actually works,” I said. Then, getting down to business, “Give me the historical background, as well as the current state of our contacts and research.”
“Mr. President, before I proceed, I must ask you to carefully consider whether or not you truly want to know more. Most presidents have never expressed any interest in the subject. Only five presidents have known what I just shared with you. Only three of those knew more than what you know now.”
“Who were the three?”
“Truman, Kennedy and Johnson, Sir. LBJ found out while still vice-president.”
“Did any of them consider going public with this information?”
“Yes Sir, Kennedy contemplated it.”
“But he changed his mind?”
“Not that I am aware, Sir. It is my understanding that he had planned to make the announcement during a luncheon speech in Dallas on November 22, 1963. He never made the speech.”
“I see.” And this time I did. I knew exactly why Kennedy never made that speech. “Has anyone outside of your agency, other than these three presidents, known about this?”
“There have been a few people. Kennedy told his two brothers and a mistress.”
“Who was the mistress?”
“A woman named Norma Jeane Baker.”
“Marilyn Monroe?” I said, more to myself than to the Colonel.
“Yes, Mr. President,” he replied in a tone devoid of emotion.
I felt a shiver go through my body as I stared at Colonel Smith. “So, are you saying that if you tell me more, I might be assassinated like John and Robert Kennedy, and that anyone close to me may die under mysterious circumstances like Marilyn Monroe?”
“Not at all, Mr. President. Truman and Johnson understood the need for secrecy and did not seek to abuse the technology that we have at our disposal. Edward Kennedy was very helpful with the Warren Commission. He briefly considered going public several years later, but came to see the importance of discretion after Chappaquiddick. Do you wish me to continue, Sir?”
“Yes,” I replied without hesitation.
“I thought you would,” he said with the faintest hint of a smile. “There is a secret compartment in your desk.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, feigning ignorance.
The Colonel continued, “You were informed of it in a letter from your predecessor that you found on the desk following your inauguration. When our agency was created, President Truman revealed the existence of the compartment to the director, and personally decided that all correspondence regarding AREA 48 would be deposited there. In that compartment, you will find a file detailing the history of our contacts with extraterrestrial life forms and their technology. The next three Tuesdays there will be a different file in the compartment, for a total of four files. Please do not remove the files from the compartment except when you are alone. Do not leave the files on the desk, and do not remove them from this office. You should not write down any notes, and you should not share this information with anyone. At some time in the next few months you will see me again on one of your regularly scheduled trips away from Washington, and I will take you on a side trip that will not be listed on your schedule. I would suggest that later today you contact the SecDef and the Joint Chiefs and ask them why they didn’t have someone in your office this morning. Regardless of the excuses they give, tell them that you just wanted to make sure there was no black group operating without your knowledge, and never bring up the subject again.”
“I will take your ‘suggestions’ under advisement, Colonel Smith.”
“Thank you, Mr. President.”
“And Colonel, I don’t need a lecture on the importance of secrecy,” I said as I rose to my feet. The Colonel stood at the same time. “I want you to know that there is one person with whom I may discuss this subject.”
“Oh?” He looked at me intently. “May I ask, Sir, who that would be?”
“My wife,” I shot back. “She is my most trusted advisor. We work as a team and I don’t keep secrets from her. Have I made myself clear?”
“Yes Sir, quite clear,” he replied.
“Since you found your way in, Colonel, I assume that you can find your way out. I look forward to seeing you again soon.”
The Colonel saluted and left the room. Finding myself alone, I walked to my desk and checked the secret compartment I had thought was known only to those who served as President. The file was there. I spent the next several minutes skimming over the pages, and realized that it would take hours to digest the material in this and the other three files I would be receiving. I put the file away and returned to the residence with much on my mind. At breakfast, my wife noticed that I was distracted, but didn’t press me for the reason. I decided not to say anything to her until I had time to work through the implications of what I had just learned. Half an hour later I came back to the Oval Office for the official start of my day. That afternoon, I called the SecDef and the Joint Chiefs. They were greatly relieved after our conversations. I wish I could have said the same for myself.