Book Jacket

 

rank 687
word count 31730
date submitted 12.06.2010
date updated 31.07.2010
genres: Thriller, Historical Fiction, Scien...
classification: moderate
incomplete

OFFSPRING

Stephen Bonniol

A novel that crosses several genres, OFFSPRING tells of ancient aliens, GODS that lived on Earth, the end of days, and the second savior.

 

OFFSPRING weaves an intricate tale of an ordinary man contacted by an alien race called the Lord. The strange beings are behind the genetic manipulation that brought about the creation of man. Biblical and science fiction references mix into a riveting account of ancient, advanced civilizations, “Gods” who lived on Earth and an ongoing “species upgrade” before the end of days.

Henry Bouchard, undergoes hypnotic regression therapy to get to the cause of terrifying dreams. OFFSPRING traces Henry’s odyssey as the therapy unlocks memories of alien abductions and forced genetic sampling. He is told that it is his destiny to be the second savior of mankind.

Other characters include Maria Sabbatini, a high-class hooker who hears the voice of God whispering instructions; Admiral Nick Whelan, an operative of a shadowy government agency searching for the legendary Atlantean Hall of Records; and Seth Bettencourt, a man obsessed with spying on Area 51. More importantly, there is Eeena, an alien who contacts Henry. She informs him of his special role and endows him with God-like powers he’ll need to defeat the Antichrist and rescue one million souls to repopulate the Earth after the imminent destruction of mankind.

 
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tags

alien abductions, ancient aliens, annunaki, armageddon, atlantis, end of days, niburu, planet x, space, sphinx

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115 comments

 

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greeneyes1660 wrote 656 days ago

Stephen, Your story building technique is BRILLIANT. Your short pitch hooks us in and lets us know we're in for a heck of a journey. A journey every human being has questioned. Then you masterfully introduce us into the lives of each of your characters, getting us emotionally rooted, and then subtly link them together to create this masterpiece.

There is a confidence and ease to both your writin and the subject matter, as if you live this everyday, and that's a talent.

You are extremely gifted, for though your descriptives and dialogue are both vivd and gripping, it is the subject matter which makes this "THE YEARS BEST THRILLER" this needs to be a movie.

I have only gotten to chapter 9 but I will most definetly be reading the rest, You should be extremely proud and the time and research you put in, has made this believable,absorbing, and outright AMAZING...Backed with no doubt Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the Heart

Stephen Bonniol wrote 662 days ago

Hi Mary
Thanks for your enthusiastic response. I have just uploaded 6 more chapters so you and others will know a bit more of the story. There are now 15 chapters posted or all of Part 1 of thenovel. The book is actually complete and is availabel via a link on my page. I chose not to upload the book in its entirety so i believe that is why it is listed as "incomplete." Rest assured though it is a completed novel and it can be in your hands in 2 days if you so choose.
Thanks again for reading

OFFSPRING
Stephen Bonniol

I have never read such a vivid description of aliens and what they are up to. This was making my stomach ache whilst I was reading it. Absolutely engrossing and urgent. I felt as though I could not read fast enough to grasp what was taking place, especially in chapter 9.

I am never sure what incomplete means and whether you have more to this story or are still in the process of writing it. If there are more chapters to come, I certainly hope you let me know when you post them here. I want to read on. I need to find out how you bring these characters together. I want to know how they are connected, if they are at all. I never stop reading a book without finishing it because I believe some of the best reading lies in the later chapters of a story and I cannot stand to miss those wonders. Stopping in the middle makes me so frustrated.

I have read enough to know you are an accomplished writer. You don't hold anything back or put a pretty face on those things that will jar the senses. Thank you for your honesty in your craft. I really feel this book has great potential. It is certainly stimulating.

Already backed and glad I did.

Cheers!

Mary Enck
A King in Time

SammySutton wrote 677 days ago

Stephen,

Provokes emotion in an unexpected way. You have developed an incredible situation.
Absolutely superb writing in a genre I sometimes shy away from, but you have married plausible and acceptable together.
Great Job!
Facinating!
Backed!
Sammy Sutton
King Solomon's '13'

JoAnnMiller wrote 705 days ago

This is an awesome book that I could not put down..It was so hard to wait til the end! But well worth the read. I suggest this book to anyone who loves adventures, mystery and plain old good science fiction. For me it was like reading a comic book because the words came alive on the pages and I could see the characters, the scenes and the surroundings in my head. It was wonderful. You will want to read it twice!

zan wrote 706 days ago

OFFSPRING

Stephen Bonniol

Stephen,
This reminds me so much of the X-Files series, especially the third season - alien adductions, forced genetic samplings - I can feel the adrenalin rush here as I love these themes. And you have more, including the end of days and the second savior! This is an amazing plot, crafted by a genius - seriously, I am not joking!! PIty there are so many, many books on the site that the really good ones are almost impossible to spot by the right people who hopefully ARE viewing. I am amazed at how easily you blend these different genres. After reading your pitches and your opening, I can only say that it makes one wonder wehether those who think they've got that stranglehold on reality aren't really the deluded ones and vice versa. I love your fictional world - the ideas you put forward are quite stimulating.
Henry waking up in that naked state was a creepy start and then the sound of breaking glass, the bright light, his tortured high-pitched wail, "Nooo stop it! get away from me! Help me, help me, God please help me!" This is gripping. Okay, I loved this so far. (Only suggestion I have is that you delete that part in in the first para where you write that his balls had shrunk into a tight little pouch - this cheapens the writing and you don't need that bit, especially at the very start - it might possibly put some people off, not that I am put off, but being on the site for some eleven months has been instructive in discerning the tastes of those possessing some of the gentler sensibilities. Of course I may be wrong, in which case, sincere apologies.)
All in all, I think this has the makings of a highly successful book and I was happy to back it.

lucy.leid wrote 459 days ago

Just have to say this before I forget - I know there's nothing wrong with it but it seems repetitive when 3 paras in a row start with the same word, "he".

But, now on to the good stuff: Your pitch caught me right away because your story sounded very smart and I can't stand science fiction that has more holes in it than swiss cheese. Your first chapter definitely delivered the perfect amount of action, information and narrative. I was feeling such anxiety by the end of the chapter that I was biting my nails! It's a little heavier than I would usually read but I'm definitely interested. You've sold me with your language and your story. Great job! Keep it up!

billysunday wrote 461 days ago

I read the first four chapters and loved it. Only criticism was C3-it was too informative and dry, but you are probably setting up your story around the volcano. 5 stars

Bec C Simmonds wrote 462 days ago

I like the awareness that the MC has of himself, this is quite funny- in a good way. I do feel that this first chapter is easy to read and flows well. I would like to see less adverbs.

Bec (Find Mark)

billysunday wrote 463 days ago

I'm 2 chapters into your novel and it's brimming with suspense. Love the religious angle with the prostitute. You know how to get the reader to turn the page. So far I am immensely enjoying it and will rate after I read another 2 or 3 chapters.

billysunday wrote 464 days ago

Fascinating intro. Backed and have a feeling will enjoy reading. If a chance, a return read would be much appreciated. Dina of 33 and Halo of the Damned

stevew wrote 530 days ago

This is a thrilling read, and a title that would hold its own on the big screen.

This is fluent writing, with a very natural pace that flows throughout the prose - A genre that is very popular, and can be followed by other titles.

Wishing you every success - BACKED!

stevew

minx2minx wrote 553 days ago

Hi Stephen...wow, you are some story teller. This is very gripping, making the reader want to just read on to the next chapter and then the next.
Good luck with this book.
I back you with pleasure and give you top star rating.
Lizzie Scott :-)

mscynthia wrote 576 days ago

Hi Stephen,

What a find 'Offspring' is! This is very well written and has enough subplots to keep me glued to it.

I liked all the different parts to it, especially the beginning that highlighted Henry Bouchards's problem. My other favorite character is Dr. Natalie Kenyon, because she has such a professional demeanor and seems to establish constructive rapports with her patients, especially Henry.

I read the first four chapters, but am thinking of reading more! Shelved.

Cynthia
Sharing Short Stories

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 12 This chapter seems out-of-place. If Yellowstone really did blow up, humanity would be in panic and survival mode. Think Pompeii only all over the globe.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 11 So sad. I've lived all my life in Wyoming. This kind of thing frightens everyone and we pray it'll never come true. BUT the author has done a nice job of describing this catastrophic event. Once again, when the writer keeps it short and to the point, I believe the writing is better.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 10 True or fictional?

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 9 Unrealistic chapter and a little bit contrived. I realize the need for this chapter but it could be rewritten to intrigue rather than bore the reader. The writer has given enough information prior to this to suggest alien abduction, the detail is not necessary. Glimpses of what's happening are enough. Let the reader 'imagine' the rest.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 8 This chapter could be simplified as some of the other chapters have been and it would be more interesting. Still the reader is left wondering if she is insane, or having a real experience. I also question why a prostitute has to always be beautiful, want sex and make lots of money. How does this effect the story and is congruent to the story or just added for the erotic thrills it is supposed to generate?

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 5. Ok- the last sentence needs to be drawn out. The writing is crisp and clear but with such a dramatic moment the reader needs to linger for a spell, to think it through. The writer needs to use his descriptive talents on that sentence..... Great writing.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 3 The action of the geological features are nicely detailed and sound rather ominous. Good job.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 2
Well-written, succinct and well-paced. Good lead into the next chapter.

Natasha Vloyski wrote 578 days ago

Ch 1 Breath-taking beginning. The author might want to use the word 'panic' to describe this chapter. A person in indescrible panic..... Great begining.

gloria piper wrote 626 days ago

Hi, Stephen,
This is a riveting tale. Nice pacing, good tension, good voice. Good description. Interesting plot. At times you are redundant. I suggest you check your words and jettison any that don't add to the story.
Backed.
Gloria
Finnegan's Quest

StaKC wrote 626 days ago

Good story line, great characters. Critique-wise, you could tighten it up a little, there are some redundant words, sentences, ect that you could get rid of. Love your descriptive style and the original plot. I think this would do well with the sci-fi crowd, and maybe a few that wouldn't usually be interested in sci-fi. Good luck.

Paula L wrote 631 days ago

Stephen, your premise hooked me and I've read the first chapter. While I like the idea, there is a lot of over-description and repetition that slowed the read and pulled me out of the story. That said it means you could cut a lot (especially adverbs) to bring the story out. Keep at it.
Paula L

aldousremoved wrote 633 days ago

I'd backed this some time ago but have recently found the time to read a lot more of it. I'm confused, how in hell's name is this heading backwards?! This is rollicking good commercial fiction! All the seeds planted throughout the first many chapters (I'm up to Ch11) are enough to keep anyone engaged in this, it's enthralling (although I think it'll turn people of logging as a career choice!). This genuinely deserves, in my estimation, to do well but I guess that's the shortfall of this site, if you don't crank the spam wheel then it doesn't matter how good it is because it will just languish, sadly. I sincerely hope that isn't the outcome here. Best of luck with it. Cheers, Anthony

CarolinaAl wrote 639 days ago

You provide us an outstanding thriller with an intelligent, thought provoking plot and fascinating characters. Rich imagery. Thorough world building. Polished writing. Backed.

Bookster wrote 641 days ago

I really like the way this novel unfolds and rapidly changes its POV. It reads much like a movie script, very visual, continuing to direct the reader forward. This is a most interesting and enjoyable page-turner.
Eric Wilder - Prairie Sunset

John Warren-Anderson wrote 641 days ago

I came to leave comments but greeneyes says it all. Backed. Good luck.

Kami K wrote 643 days ago

Superb! You're a gifted storyteller. Each new chapter brings its own intrigue and leaves me wanting more. Absolutely excellent. I hope the rest is as good as the first few chapters.
Kami x

michaeltc wrote 646 days ago

Hi Stephen,
Many thanks for the backing. Have finally returned the favor. Sorry I am running in slow gear...
Your novel is good! Honestly though, my first thought (while reading the synopsis) was " Battle Star Gallactica". Can't wait to jump in further and read it to see how good my guess was. That was one of my favorite sci-fi's, so I mean it in a good way!
Best,
Michael
Iniquity Shall Abound

Duncan Watt wrote 646 days ago

Hi Stephen ...

This a well woven tale with an unusual twist. You build the tension well as you construct the characters. The suspense climbs and grips the reader. Although not a lover of sci-fi, I like this and find it well written. Already 'backed'. Regards ... Duncan.

Stephen Bonniol wrote 651 days ago

Hi Susie,

Is there any way you might consider backing or re-backing my novel OFFSPRING in return??

You are totally fantastic, Stephen! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my 2 memoir books? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

Jambi wrote 651 days ago

Good story, good writing. Wish I had time to read more. On my shelf.

Jan
Fringe of Darkness

name falied moderation wrote 651 days ago

Dear Stephen
Your short pitch took me to your long pitch which is very well crafted and promises an interesting original read. I am amazed as I see the books on this site, with the minds, and the talent which produce writtings with such skill. HOw characters can be depicted to vividly using words as colors, and at howa story can be told and it deipcts a movie on the mind. I do wish to congratsulate you on your book. I have not read all your writing but I do wish to back this book so it may asssit you

BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, comment which is important to me, and back my book. if not that is OK also

The VERY best of luck to you

Denise
The Letter

SusieGulick wrote 652 days ago

You are totally fantastic, Stephen! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my 2 memoir books? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

Lynne Ellison wrote 652 days ago

original piece of speculative fiction

Lynne Ellison

The Green Bronze Mirror

Suzanne Adams wrote 652 days ago

Very effective title! [i.e. does what it says on the tin!] Very strong opening and whilst this is not my genre - inwardly groaned at the tags - almost from the off the work had me hooked. So I think that that just about sums up what a superbly brilliant read you've got going here. All the very best with this.

R.A. Baker wrote 653 days ago

You know your craft and you know it well. This is a well written modern sci-fi thriller--grabs your attention and doesn't let go!

Caroline Hartman wrote 655 days ago

Stephen,
Encounters of a ________ kind? Wow! You hooked me and I zipped through chapters 1-8, then because of time skipped to 16. Why isn't this published? It will be a movie. You characterized each player exquistiely, you've kept the tension as tight as a bent oak limb, and headed the story toward a powerful conclusion. Best of luck with this. It's truly wonderful, and I do not say that lightly.
Caroline
KC Hart
Summer Rose

Clare Hill wrote 656 days ago

Have you thought of tweaking that beginning ever so slightly? You could drop the first four lines, and use 'Henry Bouchard was in the grip of a fear so intense that his balls...' Pow - instant impact.
This is great stuff, and I'd buy it as aliens/gods are one of the things I think about in the middle of the night. If a man says an alien is talking to him he is given anti-pyschotics. If he says God is talking to him, he is given a church to run. Backed.

CamilleS wrote 656 days ago

Great way to start! Who wouldn't want to keep reading. Well done! Backing.

Camille
Curse of the Golden Fly

Rachel Bull wrote 656 days ago

Loved this, the first chapter is excellent and gripping and the further chapters introduce the characters and set the scene so well. Your style of writing reminds of Stephen King quite a lot and I will definitely be reading more. Good luck, backed with pleasure
Rachel

dave_ancon wrote 656 days ago

Well, you know how to tease a reader, Stephen, that is evident. Your prologue is well done as is the first chapter. I have no nits for you. When I started reading, my mind burrowed deep into the story and I found no hic-ups. Very well done, indeed. Backed, of course. Dave

GK Stritch wrote 656 days ago

Dear Stephen Bonniol,

Offspring,

Aliens, say it ain't so!!! O O O

Best and backed.

GK Stritch
CBGB Was My High School

nsllee wrote 656 days ago

Hi Stephen

This is an intriguing idea and you introduce it well through the opening vignettes. The first one seems a little long to me - two whole paras on how scared Henry he is before anything happens at all? The Maria episode is spot on. The one with the earthquake under Swansea - again, maybe less detail on plate tectonics? But overall, your writing is very competent and professional and serves the narrative well. Backed.

Nicole
Chosen

greeneyes1660 wrote 656 days ago

Stephen, Your story building technique is BRILLIANT. Your short pitch hooks us in and lets us know we're in for a heck of a journey. A journey every human being has questioned. Then you masterfully introduce us into the lives of each of your characters, getting us emotionally rooted, and then subtly link them together to create this masterpiece.

There is a confidence and ease to both your writin and the subject matter, as if you live this everyday, and that's a talent.

You are extremely gifted, for though your descriptives and dialogue are both vivd and gripping, it is the subject matter which makes this "THE YEARS BEST THRILLER" this needs to be a movie.

I have only gotten to chapter 9 but I will most definetly be reading the rest, You should be extremely proud and the time and research you put in, has made this believable,absorbing, and outright AMAZING...Backed with no doubt Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the Heart

ALPACAJUNCTION wrote 656 days ago

Offspring: A very interesting cast of characters woven into an even more interesting tale. Very good. Backed with pleasure.

lisawb wrote 658 days ago

I only had time for the first two chapters yet am already captivated and hooked. The first chapter hooks the reader straight away capturing all sorts of emotional responses. The book is written in such a way that the intensity increases and the suspense lingers. This is well written, and very cleverly thought out. The plot and structure pull the reader in and from the pitch and other comments I think this book has depth and the content leaps out., if it continues like chapter 1 and 2 then it has achieved a high level of writing already.Entertaining and gripping.

Backed,

Lisa

Jayne Lind wrote 659 days ago

Wow! What a beginning. I can't imagine anyone in a bookstore who wouldn't go ahead and buy this after skimming the first chapter. Very well written. Good luck! Jayne

Stephen Bonniol wrote 662 days ago

Hi Mary
Thanks for your enthusiastic response. I have just uploaded 6 more chapters so you and others will know a bit more of the story. There are now 15 chapters posted or all of Part 1 of thenovel. The book is actually complete and is availabel via a link on my page. I chose not to upload the book in its entirety so i believe that is why it is listed as "incomplete." Rest assured though it is a completed novel and it can be in your hands in 2 days if you so choose.
Thanks again for reading

OFFSPRING
Stephen Bonniol

I have never read such a vivid description of aliens and what they are up to. This was making my stomach ache whilst I was reading it. Absolutely engrossing and urgent. I felt as though I could not read fast enough to grasp what was taking place, especially in chapter 9.

I am never sure what incomplete means and whether you have more to this story or are still in the process of writing it. If there are more chapters to come, I certainly hope you let me know when you post them here. I want to read on. I need to find out how you bring these characters together. I want to know how they are connected, if they are at all. I never stop reading a book without finishing it because I believe some of the best reading lies in the later chapters of a story and I cannot stand to miss those wonders. Stopping in the middle makes me so frustrated.

I have read enough to know you are an accomplished writer. You don't hold anything back or put a pretty face on those things that will jar the senses. Thank you for your honesty in your craft. I really feel this book has great potential. It is certainly stimulating.

Already backed and glad I did.

Cheers!

Mary Enck
A King in Time

Sharahzade wrote 663 days ago

OFFSPRING
Stephen Bonniol

I have never read such a vivid description of aliens and what they are up to. This was making my stomach ache whilst I was reading it. Absolutely engrossing and urgent. I felt as though I could not read fast enough to grasp what was taking place, especially in chapter 9.

I am never sure what incomplete means and whether you have more to this story or are still in the process of writing it. If there are more chapters to come, I certainly hope you let me know when you post them here. I want to read on. I need to find out how you bring these characters together. I want to know how they are connected, if they are at all. I never stop reading a book without finishing it because I believe some of the best reading lies in the later chapters of a story and I cannot stand to miss those wonders. Stopping in the middle makes me so frustrated.

I have read enough to know you are an accomplished writer. You don't hold anything back or put a pretty face on those things that will jar the senses. Thank you for your honesty in your craft. I really feel this book has great potential. It is certainly stimulating.

Already backed and glad I did.

Cheers!

Mary Enck
A King in Time

ccb1 wrote 667 days ago

Thanks for backing Dark Side. We have added your book to our watchlist.
CC Brown

Idea Girl Consulting wrote 667 days ago

thanks 4 backing my novel backed yours :)

Miles A wrote 667 days ago

What a tremendously engaging book. The writing is incisive, compelling and intelligent. The humor is clever and very effective. This is a winner. Backed.

Miles A. Robinson
Song for My Father / Loud Lucy Ludlow

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