Siberia 416

The recipe for Siberia 416 is a dash of Catch 22, a splash of Monty Python, and a dose of Abbot and Costello. Mix well and serve at the dinner theater of your choice. Apparently it goes good with turnips but go easy on the rocket fuel.

A quick and entertaining read. Nicely done, Philip.

Glenn Muller
(TORQUE)

Siberia 416
Philip John

It’s a nice change to read a stage play on this site. I very much like the basic set up, and the opening style has a bit of the Godot about it, as well as “Art”, while we’re at it, with a hint of the Milligans too. I love poor weary Potov, right off the bat, and I adore the Widow Pavlova, in fact I wish I were an actress so I could play her. Their insane monotony is suitably bonkers and maddening, and the situation is just begging to have some chaos chucked into the middle of it all, like a comedy hand grenade. I assume this happens in scene 2? I have a policy about reading as many first chapters as I can on this site, and I rarely read on. My apologies to you on that score. But, I think this is admirably silly and promising, and I wish you well with it.
best wishes from
Eileen Kardos
The Noodle Trail

I like the premise, and the story would make a very good film.

Test

Hi Philip,

I don't usually read plays, but I enjoyed this and was kept amused all the way through.

Ron

No expert on plays but this seems funny and original. I'll leave it to folk like Marja to comment properly but my impression is that it would come across as suitably claustrophobic on stage. :)

The dialog is fun and the general idea of people being closed in their own little worlds is ever present and very intriguing. Backed with best wishes, M

- Weekend Chimney Sweep or Happy New Year
- Sarajevo Walls of Fate

Excellent. The verbal sparring is extremely funny. There are people like this in Local Authorities and other government places throughout Britain, I bet.

I loved this, Phillip. Very, very funny. Unlike Ariom I loved the names too.
Good luck with it.

Jenny
Lovesick

Hah, ha, hah!!! The military is the same all over the world. Maybe you should use capital letters for titles – Comrade Sergeant etc. This had me chortling. Grotov, Potov and Zotov … OK, the similarity is funny, but personally I’d prefer them to be less similar. I don’t think you need to explain CCCP = USSR; we all know that.
“Stranger? Pah! Do you want your bloody turnips or don’t you?” LOL
This is funny! Looking forward to the Americans arriving. (I’ve only read three chapters so far.)

Hello John

Just my kind of genre. I am not quite finished reading your play/novel. Please take a look at my book The Sun and The Saber, Craig Ellis. We could do a swap.
Thanks in advance.
Craig

Hello John

Just my kind of genre. I am not quite finished reading your play/novel. Please take a look at my book The Sun and The Saber, Craig Ellis. We could do a swap.
Thanks in advance.
Craig

Philip: wishing you the best on this website. But remember the caveat: you can only get out of it what you put into it. My thoughts are this: that long pitch should be expanded a bit to show more of a story arch. The short pitch works. BACKED!

I can use your comments on my novel when you get a chance. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau Key

Siberia 416 drew me with its location and potential plot.
From the start (your cast) there is no way a Sergeant would be in command of a silo.
Unlike the U.S. (where silos are manned by Air Force personnel), in Russia it’s a double tier: Air Force in control of the missiles and Army for security. There are NO silos (with weapons) in mothballs. They are active or have been taken down. In command would be an AF Major (maybe a Lt Colonel—Podpolkovnik) and security detail (usually 100 men strong) under a Senior Lieutenant. This for accuracy.
Now, let’s get to the play.
The dialogue flows natural and that’s great. The set’s a little sketchy but that’s OK.
Considering the good pace and the characters you could easily leave the ranks as they are—just state that they’re guarding and empty silo. The missile’s fine, just mention that the warhead has been taken away. That should take care of accuracy.
I really enjoyed it. You got my vote.

SIBERIA 416
This is a clever play. The way Grotov insists on maintaining protocol is both funny and tragic. The turnip lady is a good contrast to the military stance of the others. The men’s shock at seeing Americans is well portrayed. If the play has a problem, I think it needs more action (your characters have a lot of “talking heads” scenes) and your dialogue contains a lot of exposition. I realize you have a limited setting (the inside of a rocket launcher) but is there a way to keep your characters moving? Either way, I think this is a funny read. I’m adding this to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Dear Philip,
Boy do you have a talent for writing. And I would just love to sit in a room and listen to you tell this story. It is humorous, and very well crafted. One can tell also that you know your subject well and use your ability as an artist to portray this and your characters to your reader. CONGRATS
BACKED BY ME FOR SURE
I do hope you will review my book, comment and most of all BACK it. but either way the BEST of luck with yours
Denise
The Letter

It's very amusing, sad when we learn of the father being sent to a gulag after fighting Hitler and quite terrifying in the ease and incompetence it displays in the pressing of buttons to start war.
However it's weakness is in its setting and era - a time which has past. We would watch it as a piece of nostalgia and that's bound to dilute its message and any feeling of imminent danger .
Nevertheless, it HAS a message and it's still funny and you certainly know how to write dialogue. So backed. Lynn

Dear Philip, I love that you have made a play of Siberia 416 - wonderful work of art - I'd love to see it acted out. :) Your pitch is excellent, so set the hook for me to read your book. :) When you use short paragraphs & lots of dialogue in this play, it makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm backing your book. :) Could you please take a moment to back my 2 memoir books? Thanks. :) Love, Susie :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."
backed :)
Love, Susie :)