Pulling the Goalie: My lesson in how babies are made...again

Christian -

Pulling the Goalie ... You are not sparing yourself here. Through the worries, the delightful humour and contradictions shines your dedication as a father. A great introduction to parenting I nearly missed, having developed a weariness re: the tag christian after a few preachy reads. That should teach me to be weary of my weariness. I'm glad I stumbled upon your story.

Backed with pleasure, Pia (Course of Mirrors)

I absolutely LOVE this book. I want more!!!! It is well and tightly written. Your humor shines through. I want to purchase a copy for my son-in-law, who has been the stay-at-home dad for my three grandsons for the last 9 years. I want to purchase a copy for my son. I want to purchase a copy for everybody I know! Congratulatiions. Keep writing. As I said, I want MORE.

Backed completely.

Patricia West Hays
The Witness Tree

If you have time, could you take a small look at my book? Thanks.

This book belongs on the book shelf of every parent, or prospective parent. It's honest and witty and very observant, and reveals the truth of parenting and its afftect on the parents' relationship - something the so-called 'professional' books fail to do. It's also a breathtakingly funny look into your view on life, and I love it.
Backed with pleasure

Gail
NEW BEGINNINGS

'If they had a vomit warning light...' that's the exact point where I burst into loud and sympathetic laughter. There are many other moments, but notable are the condom discussion, 'is it in yet?', and the bits of the top ten that weren't serious. Doc has a sound head on his shoulder, 'Are you considering termination?' Then a mind-blowing moment, 'The microwave makes a 'G''. Nice theory re teenage rebellion, and wise words on having ambitions for your kids.

If you haven't come across it, Christian, you might enjoy Larkin's poem on parents (he's UK): http://www.artofeurope.com/larkin/lar2.htm . I only saw one possible nit in the chapters I read: 'she may and [end?] up in the surgery room'.

This is the easiest, most amusing and thought-provoking true life books I've read on here - it's full of gems of wisdom that any parent will either recognise with glee, or grab onto for dear life. I would buy Pulling the Goalie for myself, and as a present for anyone with children, or contemplating a family ... backed.

This is LAUGH OUT LOUD funny! How have I not seen this before??? As a mother to 3 kids, I thought this was fantastic. It was your book cover that caught my eye initially--I've seen that before--but it was your wit and voice that held me to the pages. By the way, Mattias is perhaps the cutest, funniest kid ever. I guess he takes after his dad? I will say it really takes the right approach to pull off a novel like this, but you did it with seeming ease. This will make the harper true life desk for sure, and I'll do my part to help it along is way!
xBeccaX
The Forever Girl

Christian, you're not active here, but your vote still counts. Please check my message to you. Thanks, Pia

So much to read since joining this site and determined to call a halt and muddle through what I have opened and then I found your book and had to add another. so refreshingly honest and forthright. Human responses that are so real. Everyday events exposed without dressing them up. It's raw and that is the beauty. The style is so easy it is almost like listening in to a radio program. Effortless. That is a great thing. I'm glad to add one more to my list. Keep it up! The writing that is.

Roger john Gillespie
Seeker John

Some lovely imagery - her ticket had been punched - indeed! Nice pace - clips along and in all promises to be a good read. Clever writing. FOUR BETTER FOUR WORSE

You, my friend, are my kind of reader :-)
Enjoy,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

"unfettered humping machines" Christian, just so you know...I am fettered. Whatever. I've added Pulling the Goalie to my watch list and will fire up the Jack on the Rocks, sit back and read till I can't stand it any more or become unfettered.

Dave Brummett

"unfettered humping machines" Christian, just so you know...I am fettered. Whatever. I've added Pulling the Goalie to my watch list and will fire up the Jack on the Rocks, sit back and read till I can't stand it any more or become unfettered.

Dave Brummett

"unfettered humping machines" Christian, just so you know...I am fettered. Whatever. I've added Pulling the Goalie to my watch list and will fire up the Jack on the Rocks, sit back and read till I can't stand it any more or become unfettered.

Dave Brummett

Scorselo:
Many thanks for your backing and support!
Peace,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

Very Funny. Everyman's nightmares are rolled into a neat little package and dropped into this book. Nice matter of fact writing style.

Backed

Scorselo

Many thanks, Royal, for your comments. Haven't come across your observation thus far, but always good to have a diversity of impressions.

If you get a chance, would you mind giving it a spin on your shelf?
Peace,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

Hi Christian,
I guess no one has to tell you that you're quite an uninhibited character! What strikes me in your writing style is the amount of effort you put into each individual paragraph. The story is not a continual narrative but a collection of witty sentences. Pretty entertaining.

In your introduction you mention that you work for a mainstream Christian publisher... A feeling I got from your F... vocabulary was hostility / hurt / anger and not so much humor in those sentences. This seemed to create a contradictory message with the rest of the tone I picked up in your writing. I wonder if others react this way?

I appreciate your honesty and openness in writing, you are letting others see a lot in your communication.

Best wishes and much success,
- Royal (An Inscrutable Plan for the Mutant Twins)

Hi Christian,
I guess no one has to tell you that you're quite an uninhibited character! What strikes me in your writing style is the amount of effort you put into each individual paragraph. The story is not a continual narrative but a collection of witty sentences. Pretty entertaining.

In your introduction you mention that you work for a mainstream Christian publisher... A feeling I got from your F... vocabulary was hostility / hurt / anger and not so much humor in those sentences. This seemed to create a contradictory message with the rest of the tone I picked up in your writing. I wonder if others react this way?

I appreciate your honesty and openness in writing, you are letting others see a lot in your communication.

Best wishes and much success,
- Royal (An Inscrutable Plan for the Mutant Twins)

Very Funny. Everyman's nightmares are rolled into a neat little package and dropped into this book. Nice matter of fact writing style.

Backed

Scorselo

Pulling the Goalie: My lesson in how babies are made...again

Christian Piatt

Non fiction with many echoes in real life I am sure. In some respects, you you have constructed images in a mirror for society's benefit. Family life can be messy, unpredictable and stressful, and I agree, having a child with an independent streak a mile long can be a challenge! I have one with such a streak which I think must be at least ten miles long! Interesting stuff. On my shelf and all the best in finding a publisher.

Dear Christian,
Your opening chapter is funny. To me it seemed a bit obvious, the boob jokes especially. But definitely humorous.

BACKED
Elizabeth Wolfe (MEMORIES OF GLORY)

Hi, Christian,
Backed.
Gloria
Finnegan's Quest

Christian,
'Fuck it' indeed. This is an excellent and entertaining read. I am not one to read non-fiction, but I was never at a point where I was looking for the end of the chapter. That is a good sign.
Well done and sorry it took me so long to respond to your comment and backing.
MickR - The Nightcrawler

A second comment (which I rarely make): This is the sort of book that genteel-minded readers may be offended by and that hypocritical readers may pretend to be offended by. Those of us who are not offended will mostly be those too realistic to be genteel or hypocritical, and we can enjoy it. It's a well written, open-eyed, hardnosed account of one of life's most demanding little dramas, and I am backing it without reservation.

Bill

I like the narrative voice here--sounds very much like a real person talking, not merely a literary equivalent. A lot of people are already primed for this one, and I predict that it will do very well.

Bill

With a pitch like that you could ignore this book it screams out ‘Readme’. I’m just into chapter three and have read at least six snippets out loud to my husband who didn’t seem quite so amused as I was at the male point of view on babies – well obviously he is a male so his view would differ to mine. I am enjoying the huge use of irony, replaced every now and then with what we British call sarcasm. Your book is a refreshing change to the normal Vampire, Thriller, Sci-Fi as is so common on Authonomy. I hope it does well for you.


Wilma1
Knowing Liam Riley – please take a moment to take a look.

Very honest, and written in such an easy familiar style, I thought I was listening to my son talking. Backed with pleasure. Eunice.

Backed your book the other day Chris on the Pitch to read after.
Have now finished a good read and this is really funny.
Straight from the start it's howl of laughter.
At the same time, your book is very well written and I can see it on the book shelves in the market place.
SHELVED.

kind regards,Neville (The Secrets Of The Forest - Series)

Brilliant, funny, well-written, great title (the title was what pulled me in, before the pitch caught me and wouldn't let go) and hopefully the first of several by Christian Piatt.
Unquestionably backed and thanks for the warnings . . .
Peter Wild
Double Action

this is truly a funny book. love the 'i'm sorry you suck' comment. oh, those kids...

backed with extreme pleasure.

This is compelling writing. Witty, entertaining and so true! I really hope that this does as well as I think it will. Sarah

I started by reading every word but, running short of time after a few chapters, I eventually only read the bits by Mattias. I seriously believe that he should be cited as co-author as he provides far more than his share of the humour. This book is actually very funny, but it is almost always at its funniest when it is at its most realistic and recognisable.
Backed with pleasure.
RT

This is one of the funniest things that I have come across here.

Really. While reading I actually said, "Oh no he didn't!" (out loud) Several times. I love how you start the chapter, I love how you end it in the exact same place. Brilliant!

You are so funny!

Let me know when you publish. I want to buy a copy!

To quote any illiterate moron of the younger generation: LOL.
A book with humor and heart.
Backed.

Winning voice to this with its chatty and yet concise tone. Loved the description of the baby about to be sick. This is great fun with all its self effacing wit but there's also a delightful tenderness beneath the satire. Big thumbs up from me.

This is so funny - because it's so true! Great book, Christian, glad to back.
Vall
Midwyf

hi Christian,
oh the wonders of parenthood . . . and you describe them so well! I love your inner wranglings, I like the devotion, I like the conflict, -and all this concerning an event which is the most natural thing on earth, and which in my view spills lasting sanity.
The writing is packed with humour, irony, light sarcasm and questions about existence. Your characterisations show real people who are very likeable. The style is lighthearted while dealing with serious issues.
As mother of 8 I can only imagine what you will think about that, but I can assure you it was orgasmic, and not only during the puking periods. All I can say is, each one turns out completely different, and while the creation process may be clear in your memory, you still wonder where they come from. Greetings to Amy and Mattias and the new little treasure ( this is non-fiction I understand) and best wishes with your wonderful book. Backed.

I certainly agree with most of your statement above, especially that last bit. I like the insight into the dynamics of a marriage.

This is really funny and well written too. Backed, with pleasure.

Cat

Hi Andrew:

Yes, we've both already backed one another. Best of luck on your race for the editor's desk. I hope to make it there as well at some point.

Peace,
Christian Piatt

I really like no love your openning. "Two Fatefull Words," had me laughing and hooked immediately. Well done. Your first person narrative voice resonates with authenticity and clarity of purpose driving your messages home loud and clear. Your descriptive writing and insights sprinkled with delicious humour makes your work a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Hi Christian, strong writing. love the conversational tone + sly humour.
on my shelf.
no quibbles; it's a clean ms.
best wishes, andy

Thanks so much, Anmari, for your kind words and support of PULLING THE GOALIE. i greatly enjoyed your work as well and expect you're well on your way to success.
Best of luck!
Christian Piatt

Christian,

I read all 11 chapters this afternoon and I must say I am impressed. You have some minor issues in the writing but nothing another good read over won't find. I love the way you tell this story very raw very real. I am happy to see a guy's perspective to the whole baby thing that causes women to gush and men to cry. Thank you. I happily back this based on its merit and your ability as a writer.

Autumn Rosen
My Four Fathers & Eleanor
My Novel Affair

Christian,

I read all 11 chapters this afternoon and I must say I am impressed. You have some minor issues in the writing but nothing another good read over won't find. I love the way you tell this story very raw very real. I am happy to see a guy's perspective to the whole baby thing that causes women to gush and men to cry. Thank you. I happily back this based on its merit and your ability as a writer.

Autumn Rosen
My Four Fathers & Eleanor
My Novel Affair

A really insightful commentary on subjects not many people like to be so open about. Family life - having children (or not), how that works, who does what, how it impacts are all things that are meant to be so natural and easy and fun - but they come with a whole pair of tights worth of frogs, don't they. I think this is honest, open and will pull a lot of bellropes with a lot of people. I've only read chapter one as I write this, but will watchlist and read on.
Polly.
STONES.

Thanks much for your kind words about PULLING THE GOALIE. If you get a chance to give it a spin on your shelf, I'd greatly appreciate it.
Peace,
Christian Piatt

I love the style, love the humor and was drawn right into the book. From the first few words. Definitely a winner imho.

S.J.

I love the style, love the humor and was drawn right into the book. From the first few words. Definitely a winner imho.

S.J.

So glad you liked it, Lorri. I look forward to your thoughts.
Peace,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

I loved your pitch! I think it might just make me read your book!

I loved your pitch! I think it might just make me read your book!

It's a nice story, I think it's some potential towards its target audience. IMPRESSIVE.

Down to earth humour written with an eye for detail and full of rich observations.
Originality shines through.
Jane

Very human - with the ability to capture life as it is and then enable us to appreciate it a little bit more as we enjoy the humor the lurks beneath the reality that is everyday life. I look forward to reading more.

Thanks for backing The Smoke That Thunders and for you encouraging comments.

Cheers, Nate

Christian -

Pulling the Goalie ... You are not sparing yourself here. Through the worries, the delightful humour and contradictions shines your dedication as a father. A great introduction to parenting I nearly missed, having developed a weariness re: the tag christian after a few preachy reads. That should teach me to be weary of my weariness. I'm glad I stumbled upon your story.

Backed with pleasure, Pia (Course of Mirrors)

I absolutely LOVE this book. I want more!!!! It is well and tightly written. Your humor shines through. I want to purchase a copy for my son-in-law, who has been the stay-at-home dad for my three grandsons for the last 9 years. I want to purchase a copy for my son. I want to purchase a copy for everybody I know! Congratulatiions. Keep writing. As I said, I want MORE.

Backed completely.

Patricia West Hays
The Witness Tree

If you have time, could you take a small look at my book? Thanks.

Hey Denise:
Thanks so much for your support of PULLING THE GOALIE, and best of luck with your project as well. I've added it to my watch list and look forward to check it out soon.
Peace,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

Ok, I've only read through the first chapter and a half and this is fantastic! I love it, laughing hysterically at the reality of it. I will read the rest shortly but this will be backed with pleasure. I, too, think that every new or perspective parent should read this.

Denise

Ida:
Thanks so much for your support of PULLING THE GOALIE, and best of luck with your project as well.
Peace,
Christian Piatt
PULLING THE GOALIE

QUOTE] Christian Piatt:

I'm not quite sure what your intentions were in writing this book, but it certainly cuts to the heart of family planning. Just when you think you've got it all figured out the unthinkable happens. Many have been faced with this 'happenstance' as is indicative of the many teenagers who find themselves the older siblings of newborns. Since the issue of abortion is forbidden for those in both the Catholic and Mormon faiths it seems an open and shut case. Have the baby, adjust to life as new parents - FUCK IT! (SMILE) Nicely done. Backed.

Ida L. (Silent Storm)

Christian Piatt:

I'm not quite sure what your intentions were in writing this book, but it certainly cuts to the heart of family planning. Just when you think you've got it all figured out the unthinkable happens. Many have been faced with this 'happenstance' as is indicative of the many teenagers who find themselves the older siblings of newborns. Since the issue of abortion is forbidden for those in both the Catholic and Mormon faiths it seems an open and shut case. Have the baby, adjust to life as new parents - FUCK IT! (SMILE) Nicely done. Backed.

Ida L. (Silent Storm)

Ok, I've only read through the first chapter and a half and this is fantastic! I love it, laughing hysterically at the reality of it. I will read the rest shortly but this will be backed with pleasure. I, too, think that every new or perspective parent should read this.

Denise

best title of a book i ve seen for some time

Your book may have a drastic effect on the future of the human race. No-one will have babies!
It's well written as a kitchen sink style story. My advice would be to get a sub-plot introduced early on to create extra reader interest. A hateful boss having an affair with a woman you fancy.
Hope the book does well.I backed it.
Kind regards
David (Flawless Murder)