Just say the wrong thing and you'll be
swimming with the mermaids…
A lone constable was patrolling the docks along the edge of the water. The moon provided him more light than any of the night lamps that were still working. He looked up to watch the markers from an airplane blink across the sky above him. For now everything’s superbly quiet, but in a few hours that will all be changed as the city emerges from a well earned day of rest.
Across from the docks there’s a tavern, and in it this particular night you could find the drunken crew of the clipper ship Casperia, each man trying his hardest to run out the whiskey. The ship’s cargo and supplies were already loaded. Come first light they would be leaving port and returning to the open seas.
The shipmates had nothing more to do until the vessel sailed again but for Captain Gernickyz, this was his busy time. Like many instances before, he sat in the back of the tavern with his charts and navigation tools scattered out across a few tables.
Only two other people are permitted to join him. One is his First Mate, Sedgwick, who’s been with him from the beginning. Like a true and tested friend, Sedgwick is involved in every small detail of the captain’s business.
Next to the captain and sitting rather close to him at his table is his latest female companion, Sheila. Unbeknownst to the poor girl, the captain selected for himself a new Sheila with every voyage. Sadly, the women are never on board the ship by the time that the boat returns to port.
Everything seems respectable enough for the Casperia, at least on the surface and in the eyes of the world. Captain Gernickyz hires her out as a cargo ship to make his living by day. It’s only on the return trip home that he engages in a bit of pirating. That’s when he makes his real money and by the way, that's pronounced Grrrrr......nickey.
In a modern day world of cell phones and high speed Internet technology, you might say that he’s old fashioned to be using a clipper ship for his pirating. However, he’d discovered a method that was proven to work time and time again. “So why change it?” is what he would say to that.
More importantly for the captain, by using such an outdated ship- it helped keep the Casperia operating under the radar. The authorities did not yet suspect him or his crew of any kind of wrongdoing, other than being complete scoundrels.
The captain conducted his business wisely. It was his father who originally taught he and his younger brother James the wayward trade of looting ships. There are but two simple rules to live by according to him, “Use the cover of darkness to do your deed, and leave no witnesses behind to tell the tale.”
Earlier in the evening a courier had delivered a sealed document to the tavern, addressed to the captain. The document revealed a list of ships that would be out sailing the seas at the same time as the Casperia. It also showed their proposed manifests and destinations. In fact, the list contained all the information needed to be able to intercept and hijack any ship of his choosing.
This was certainly his favorite part of the trip planning. As the captain scanned over the document, you could see (by the raising of his eye brow) that he had found his next treasure. Looking up at his First Mate, he then turned the list around so that the others could see his choice.
Sedgwick looked over the list of ships. He found the entry that was marked by the captain and asked inquisitively, “The Tarkinuba?”
The captain’s excitement, which never amounted to more than just a small smirch of a grin affirmed his reply, “Aye, dya-monds! It’ll be four days out and four days back, and we’ll need to have a bigger bank than they can make!”
After a brief celebration, Sedgwick studied the sea charts for a bit more and then put all the equipment away. Captain Gernickyz spent most of the rest of the evening at his private table drinking and having close conversations with Sheila. They had met no more than a month ago. He was getting to know her a bit better before they took to the open seas.
Hours later, as the sun finally peeked out over the port city, the sound of four sets of hard shoes came stomping along the docks. The marching ceased abruptly in front of the tavern door. Two constables walked side by side followed by a man in an expensive gray suit, who was himself followed by another young man about seventeen years old. They wasted no time bolting through the door and after looking around a bit, all four of them surged through the crowd, heading directly over to the captain’s table.
Gernickyz snarled, “Whatever it is I’m accused of I didn’t do it, I’ve been in here all night!”
He pulled his pistol from its holster and set it down on the table, the busy end was pointing towards them. As a show of support, the crew also cluttered around in a loose circle behind the men and drew their pistols, knives, and some broken bottles.
Now the captain knew from experience that a drunken crew with so many ways to die all pointing in his general direction would be sure to end in catastrophe, so he took the initiative and wailed out, “Just say the wrong thing and you’ll be swimming with the mermaids!”
That appeased the crowd for a moment as they erupted in a good hearty laugh. The man in the fine suit took off his hat and spoke up rather boldly saying, “Captain Gernickyz, my name is Robert Creekstone, attorney at law. I’ve traveled here from the United States to see you. I’m sorry to say that your brother James is dead.”
At that statement the entire crowd went mute, but only for an instant. They knew just how the captain would likely respond to something like that. As if in concert the gang exchanged glances and let out a bellowing roar. Gernickyz slowly reached for his pistol and pulled back the hammer. Creekstone gripped his hat tightly with both hands. He was understandably reluctant to speak after that but had much more that he needed to say.
“And how did my dear brother die?” asked the captain.
“Well…” Creekstone cleared his throat and muttered, “Doctors aren’t quite certain but they think that it was in something he ate- maybe, yes perhaps food poisoning. But your brother left a sizeable inheritance and that’s partly why I’m here this morning.”
Oh how sweet this sounded, it was music to the captain’s ears! Upon hearing that piece of news, he then motioned for the crowd to turn away and to go back about their own business. He also carefully lowered the hammer of his pistol and returned it to its’ holster.
“My brother was richer than the man that invented escargot!”
“Well, yes I suppose he was,” said the attorney. “And now his entire fortune is to be divided up between you and several other beneficiaries. There’s going to be a reading of the will in New York on the 25th of this month.”
“Why do you look familiar to me?” Gernickyz asked.
He replied, “I’m from the offices that manage your grandfather’s trust fund, Jedediah Creekstone is my uncle.”
“You said that’s partly why you’re here?” asked the captain.
“Oh yes,” Creekstone said. He moved to the side a little and brought the young man more forward. “This is Nicklaus Hastings. Before your brother passed on, he asked me to present him to you and read this letter out loud.”
Gernickyz looked over the boy with an irritated eye as the lawyer began to read the letter:
__________________________________________
Dear brother, it would appear that you have outlived me after all. It’s been way more than fifteen years since we had the falling out and parted ways that day. Time heals many things, and so it is in this case that I have moved on and decided that it wasn’t all your fault. You had no right to take Sheila the way you did but I realize that it takes two people to make a choice like that. Standing here in front of you is living proof that everything you do on the sly will one day be made known to everyone, it’s all recorded in the book that matters.
Sheila says that there’s no way for us to be certain, so this young man Nicklaus could be either yours or mine.
I was planning to bring him on board with me on his 18th birthday and teach him the trade that our father imparted to us, but now it’s for you to do since I’m gone. Besides, I think the boy looks more like you than me. Bring him with you, both of you together when my estate is divided up and you will receive everything you’ve got coming to you.
Finally my brother, Lezander, I think it’s time to return the pink parasol to it’s rightful owner, bring that along too- I must insist.
Yours truly,
Skiffy1
__________________________________________
“Her name was Sheila too!” Sheila commented to the captain as she clung to his arm.
“That’s right, my dear, Sheila is a very pretty name indeed.”
Creekstone handed an envelope to the captain, explaining, “These are the directions to my offices in New York, along with hotel reservations and the time of the meeting. Now do you agree to bring both Nicklaus and the pink parasol with you to New York as your brother James requires?”
The captain closed his eyes and calculated for a minute, then replied, “Yes, I suppose I can do that.”
He asked Gernickyz, “Do you plan to fly?”
“No, I have a ship that needs sailing.”
“Then you’ll need to provide a certified DNA sample as soon as possible and have it forwarded to my offices in New York. Inside the packet that I just handed to you there’s a pamphlet, and I’ve identified several locations where you can have this done nearby.”
The lawyer tried to wind up the conversation by saying, “So we’ll see you about the 25th. Have a pleasant voyage. Oh, by the way…” He reached into his case and handed a second envelope to the young man. He added, “Remember what we talked about, Nicklaus, you will be old enough to participate in this year’s family tournament. These are the game rules and regulations established by your great grandfather years ago.”
He looked at Gernickyz and continued, “So Lezander, you’ve won the ‘big game’ for each of the last eight years. Maybe you would be kind enough to go over some of the dynamics with Nick, and bring him up to speed on being the family trust fund overseer- things he’ll need to know for when he wins.”
The captain protested, “You mean ‘if’ he wins!”
Creekstone’s countenance turned angry. “Correct. ‘If’ he wins. Wouldn’t that make for a wonderful after-party, if you finally handed over the reins to someone else in the group for a change. I’m sure that the rest of your family would be in Hillbilly Heaven!“
The captain fired back. “No one in my family has ever been hung as horse thieves, Robert. You’d be wise to remember that. You Creekstone’s have come a long way since those days, but dippin’ horse apples in chocolate doesn’t make them taste any better.”
Robert cleared his throat- a little embarrassed by his family history. “Well, all your other family members have agreed to reschedule the game for the 28th, just days after the reading of the will since the whole family will be gathered together already.”
After saying this, he and the constables withdrew from the tavern, leaving the young man with the captain.
Gernickyz invited the lad to sit down across from him with a firm gesture. Everything written down on the pages that follow are from my recollection of all that has transpired, since first being introduced to the captain in the tavern.
I am that Nicklaus Hastings.