Insane Reno

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created a most memorable main character in Lizzy. I also like your use of the first person narrative voice as this allows you to explore her thoughts and feelings. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing makes your crime thriller a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Dear Jossie

I have to comment on your short and long pitch, as they both encourage your reader to delve deeper into your book. Original storyline and you certainly have a way of crafting that really keeps me ( your reader) wanting to really finish this read. Even with a non-fiction one is still telling, and you tell well. As one reads your work it becomes obvious that you have done done much research which gives addedd interest.
BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK
also
The VERY best of luck to you

Denise
The Letter

Dear Jossie, I loved chapter 6 :) - delightful. :) Your pitch kinda made me think scary, but it ended great. :) Tight dialogue & paragraphs moved your story right along. :) Great write. :) More to come? :) I've backed your book :) - could you please take a moment to back my memoirs book? :) Thanks so very much. :) Love, Susie :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."

Hi Jossie,
I've read all you posted and thought it was very good so far.
Your characters are great and dialogue is spot on. The use of the gritty first person is consistent and strong.
The arrival at Insane Reno...the new home is very well told. (I liked Dad's touch on mum's knee--it said so much).
I loved the bit with Jem when he asks, "Where's my grub?" and gets such a great answer. It's well worth working on this -- it has real potential. More please.
Backed with pleasure,
Barry
LITTLE KRISNA AND THE BIHAR BOYS

This book has a great hook and an excellent premise. I found your writing style to be unique and pleasant to follow. You have done a great job building mystery and giving the reader an inkling of the spooky events yet to come. Best of luck with this. MJ

INSANE RENO-Jossie Marie Solheim
hullo Jossie. the location which you chose for your 'farmhouse' set the tone of the story for me. Although I am an American, I have great respect for avoiding 'suspected' spookie things espicially on the 'moor'. Story is flowing well with good end chapter hooks to keep attention of the reader. Already shelved and backed.
Please take a look at my book if you have not and thanks for that.
Linda Lou Long
Southern dis-Comfort
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=11421

My goodness this is an intiguing plot. Your pitch is superb, and I just had to know more. You have crafted a masterpiece here, and I would love to see it on the screen one day. The storyline builds up around your fascinating characters extremely well, and I am more than happy to back. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

Unique primise and solid writing. C W

You have a really moody and tension filled way of writing. I think you have a great way of showing us what is going on in a scene and having us feel it. Great characters too, they feel well developed over the course of a couple chapters. I like your setting too, the town, the new home, it all adds to the feel of your book. And your voice is nice too. I couldn't really find anything to fault in this, of course I am horrible at finding errors! The story itself is intriguing and I'd read on!

Missy
Mark of Eternity

I am enthralled by this book. You write naturally and the desire to read on is overwhelming.

This is an interesting premise, and promises to be a very well crafted and thoughtful book. Best of luck to you. Backed. Mariah

Insane Reno
Interesting pitch, I like your style of writing
Backed
Eveleen
(Turning a new leaf)

I really like this. Travelling to a new house - her mother afraid for some reason - the name of the place - and Bodmin itself all sent out little tendrils of anticipation and tension making me want to carry on reading to find out what's going on. Like the voice of the protagonist and you describe the atmosphere between the parents well, and her reactions to it. Realistic dialogue - especially like the bit where the father is trying to gloss over, or jolly the mother along - answering his own questions as if she'd answered.

Just one or two quries:

'Porcelain skin' is a little bit of a cliche, and 'chocolate hair' just made me think of a flake bar!!

I got a little confused over the tense at one point: You say 'Here we are, moving to a new house...' then 'My mum IS sat in the front.....' then you return to 'I began..' 'I lifted...' in the past tense again.

Otherwise, I carrying on to chapter three and beyond. Happy to back this.
Cariad
STONES.

This story has a lot of things going on, what with the Jem-Lizzy romance, the murder mystery, the mystery around Lizzy's mum's changed behavior and the possibility of a haunted house. You keep the suspense high and the personal scenes involving Lizzie are endearing. She is a character who will appeal to young adults if that is part of your target audience. She has a wild side but is kind and not out-of-control. My one suggestion would be to break the pitch into paragraphs and connect the sentences describing Lizzie's attraction to the one stating that the story winds from mystery to romance. All in all, I found Insane Reno to be a very engaging read that should appeal to readers of romance, mystery, personal discovery or horror. Backed.
Niobrara Kardnova (Family Irregulars)

You are totally fantastic, Jossie! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my memoirs book? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

You set the scene and the stage for the later conflict with careful attention to subtle detail through the narrators young eyes...very well crafted writing!
Backed
Stewart

Entertainingly written. There are many elements here that will make this narrative a strong contender on this site and little for me to add as suggestions for improvement.

BACKED

Interesting premise and solid start. My money's on jem for the killer

You have written a nicely paced story and your use of the first person immediately gets the reader involved; while the initial tension in the car sets the scene for what is to follow.
Backed with pleasure.
Katy Christie
No Man No Cry

Insane Reno intrigues from the outset. Moving into a house where one murder has been committed might be creepy, but seven murders would be more than a little daunting even if you didnt believe in ghosts. The mother seems most bothered about it, and it appears she may have some idea as to what actually went on. Lizzy doesnt appear that concerned at first, looking at it more from the angle of how she'll have an exciting story or two to tell her friends. The father keeps stum but there are hints that he too knows more about what happenned. There are more than enough hooks here to keep the reader interested in the mystery surrounding the house and the murders. And there is the sense that there is much truth to be untangled from the circumstances in which the man with down syndrome took the rap for the murders.

John O'Brien - Other Face

Descriptive and with a style of writing that is real and easy to follow. I am sure that judging from the first chapters you have a well thought out and intriguing plot. A good imagination and well written.

I wish you every success.

Jane

Jossie,
I really enjoy reading Insane Reno. I've already read 2 chapters and it's well-written. Good plot, synopsis, I like how you write up Lizzy and her parents. The first-person narrative works out very well. You can't help imagine what sort of past Lizzy's mother knows about the house and how Lizzy will find out. You put in a well-balanced description of the house and rooms as Lizzy walks in for the first time. One can share in her disappointment that it didn't look like some sort of "Munsters" haunted house, but something plain and ordinary - with the exception of the history of murders, suposedly upsteirs... but the mystery of this well out in the garden intices me to read on. What spooks Lizzy's mom so much about the well? I can imagine a TV movie one day. Backed.
I only found a couple of nit picks but I forgot where they were at. I think you'll find them if you read the text again slowly.
All the best
Kirk
"How to Steal a lion"

Hi Jossie,
I've read all you posted and thought it was very good so far.
Your characters are great and dialogue is spot on. The use of the gritty first person is consistent and strong.
The arrival at Insane Reno...the new home is very well told. (I liked Dad's touch on mum's knee--it said so much).
I loved the bit with Jem when he asks, "Where's my grub?" and gets such a great answer. It's well worth working on this -- it has real potential. More please.
Backed with pleasure,
Barry
LITTLE KRISNA AND THE BIHAR BOYS

thank you so much, i am working on insane reno some more today whats up already still needs some polishing, but I'll work on a few more so I can hopefully get them up soon, thank you so much for you comment.
hugs joss

Hi Jossie,
I've read all you posted and thought it was very good so far.
Your characters are great and dialogue is spot on. The use of the gritty first person is consistent and strong.
The arrival at Insane Reno...the new home is very well told. (I liked Dad's touch on mum's knee--it said so much).
I loved the bit with Jem when he asks, "Where's my grub?" and gets such a great answer. It's well worth working on this -- it has real potential. More please.
Backed with pleasure,
Barry
LITTLE KRISNA AND THE BIHAR BOYS

Dear Josie
Great voice, original topic and amazingly good writing
Backed with pleasure
Helen
The Last Dream

awwwwwwwwwww thank you

Dear Josie
Great voice, original topic and amazingly good writing
Backed with pleasure
Helen
The Last Dream

How strange echoes of my previous read- the eyes of a daughter exploring her parents angst. This is a compelling read and gives us just enough ammunition to march forward into the story in order to explore the new abode and the new dynamics it may bring to the relationships therein. Backed with pleasure.

Best wishes with your writing.

Richard

thank you RIchard, I'm glad you liked it, I will try to get more chapters up soon, I have the whole book written but I'm still working on polishing it up at the moment.
love and hugs xxx

Dear Jossie

I have to comment on your short and long pitch, as they both encourage your reader to delve deeper into your book. Original storyline and you certainly have a way of crafting that really keeps me ( your reader) wanting to really finish this read. Even with a non-fiction one is still telling, and you tell well. As one reads your work it becomes obvious that you have done done much research which gives addedd interest.
BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK
also
The VERY best of luck to you

Denise
The Letter

Hi denise,
thank you so much for your awesome comment, I will absolutely take a look at your book I tried to look at something from everyone who take the time to read mine, it takes me a little while to work through everyone sometimes. but I will get there, in fact I should get to you quite quickly as I start with the people that comment, because I havent quite figured out how you work out who has backed your book, bar, looking at the little bit in my profile.
thank you so much for you awesome comment and I cant wait to take a look at your work. ((((((((hugs)))))))

I don't think I'd move to a house nicknamed "Insane Reno," but you have an intriguing premise for an fascinating thriller. I'll be back to read more when I can. Backed for now.

lol me either, but tiz doesnt get much choice, as her father makes the decition for her and she is left with two choices, stay with him or go and live with her mother, who is not really her fav person lol.
thank you for you backing KW I really appreciated it.

I don't think I'd move to a house nicknamed "Insane Reno," but you have an intriguing premise for an fascinating thriller. I'll be back to read more when I can. Backed for now.

Dear Jossie

I have to comment on your short and long pitch, as they both encourage your reader to delve deeper into your book. Original storyline and you certainly have a way of crafting that really keeps me ( your reader) wanting to really finish this read. Even with a non-fiction one is still telling, and you tell well. As one reads your work it becomes obvious that you have done done much research which gives addedd interest.
BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK
also
The VERY best of luck to you

Denise
The Letter

How strange echoes of my previous read- the eyes of a daughter exploring her parents angst. This is a compelling read and gives us just enough ammunition to march forward into the story in order to explore the new abode and the new dynamics it may bring to the relationships therein. Backed with pleasure.

Best wishes with your writing.

Richard

I lived in Bude growing up, I'm nearby it now in a small village. most of Insane Reno is set on Bodmin moor, but Bude pops into the story a lot too, later on. thank you for your comment and I will def be posting more chapters.

Good opening chapter, I used to go to Bude on Holiday when I was a child so had to take a look at this. I hope you load more chapters.

thank you all for your comments and backing it is truely appreciated. Yes there is more to come, I am still polishing things up at the moment so just wanted to give you all an examble but will try to add more soon.
I look forward to readig some of your work also.
((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) joss

Talented writing and an intriguing storyline make this easy to back.

Liz
The Cheech Room
A Fine Pickle

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created a most memorable main character in Lizzy. I also like your use of the first person narrative voice as this allows you to explore her thoughts and feelings. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing makes your crime thriller a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Dear Jossie, I loved chapter 6 :) - delightful. :) Your pitch kinda made me think scary, but it ended great. :) Tight dialogue & paragraphs moved your story right along. :) Great write. :) More to come? :) I've backed your book :) - could you please take a moment to back my memoirs book? :) Thanks so very much. :) Love, Susie :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."

I love what I've read of this. Your writing is very descriptive and your characters full of personality. Keep up the good work. I look forward to reading the completed novel.

:) comment to follow - read & commented on shortly thereafter :)