Different

Thank you Sandy, I'm glad you enjoyed it and pleased you picked up on the moral ambiguity..I want to make people think...

Appreciate the support. Keep in touch

Hi Joanna, thanks for sharing your novel. I love your amazingly rich story telling, the ambiguity of implicit judgements on a politically hot subject, and, above all, your masterful weaving of strands of dialogue.
Sandy

Thank you Liz :-)

This is a compelling read and I'd buy it so I'm backing it for at least 24 hours.

Liz
The Cheech Room
A Fine Pickle

Hi Joanna, thanks for sharing your novel. I love your amazingly rich story telling, the ambiguity of implicit judgements on a politically hot subject, and, above all, your masterful weaving of strands of dialogue.
Sandy

This is a compelling read and I'd buy it so I'm backing it for at least 24 hours.

Liz
The Cheech Room
A Fine Pickle

Different

Hi Joanna,

It says it in the title and it certainly is, a wonderfully intriguing human interest story to whet our appetites and to question our moral code no doubt. Should he or shouldn't he for a start. What a great start to, crisply written, I love the rabbiting of her mind in the background, so much authenticity packed in such sparse, clipped writing. I'm hooked and I will be back to read more.

Best wishes
Andrew W.
Benevolence

1st person plural. Haven't encountered that in awhile.

The context is universal. Prickling our own nostalgia as we read. Good hook.

I love how you bring up the past. We all have histories like this.

"And you're back" Nicely done.

The internal monologue is great. Obsessive and compelling.

Teacher. That was shocking. Nicely done again.

This ch didn't go at all as suspected. I liked the surprises.

I have two concerns I'll lay out in your messages.

Hi, Just to say I really like the prose style - including the 2nd person pov.
Maybe, as Gefordson suggests, try to build Dave up into a character in his own right, and maybe develop some of the reminiscences of her teen years into flashbacks (eg, the part at the bottom of chapt. 1 where she meets the girlfriend), hopefully by that means you can add another 20K to the mss to make it a publishable length.
All the best,
NaomiM

Thanks Naomi - there are several flashbacks later in the ms (see ch 3, ch 6 and others) - but I do think Dave (and other characters) can be developed further and hopefully that will help me add some 'meat'!
Appreciate the comments and glad the pov worked for you.
J

Hi, Just to say I really like the prose style - including the 2nd person pov.
Maybe, as Gefordson suggests, try to build Dave up into a character in his own right, and maybe develop some of the reminiscences of her teen years into flashbacks (eg, the part at the bottom of chapt. 1 where she meets the girlfriend), hopefully by that means you can add another 20K to the mss to make it a publishable length.
All the best,
NaomiM

Thanks everyone for your comments.
Gefordson - I agree that the character of Dave is a bit under-developed, he's more of a 'function' than a fully rounded character and I'm working on that. I suppose the claustrophobia you mention is deliberate, but I appreciate that might make the book difficult at times.
Mary - thank you for such insightful feedback, I think the POV is not going to be to everyone's liking but I've gone back to it a few times and it is really critical for me for the book - this idea of Fiona writing 'for' her teacher, and the book becomes a final story, almost an elegy, for him. Appreciate such positive comments from someone with such excellent taste in books! ;-)
Am a little behind with my reading but will genuinely try to read everyone's books as a sign of my appreciation.
JW

This is a unique manuscript that captures us from the first word. Tarrant

Fiona,
I can't understand why this book doesn't have a higher ranking. In parts it's excellent. You write with such confidence. I've only read the first 6 chapters but in that the only thing that jarred was the HM, him, Humber bit. I thought it was unecessary - up to then you'd been so subtle. I don't agree with the 2nd person pov point made earlier although what I would say is that it does become claustrophobic - because we are trapped inside Fiona's head. I felt it might have balanced the book more if you'd perhaps brought Dave to life - the way he's shuffled off into the background makes Fiona a bit callous and it takes away some of the possible narrative tension. (Maybe you address this later?)
Anyway, I wish I had time to read more. I'll certainly keep it on my w/l to remind me to come back to it and I may reshelve it later this month.
Best of luck with this.

Gefordson
Nothing you can do.

DIFFERENT

Dear JW,
I love the writing. I thought I could predict what the book would be by the pitch, however the writing is way deeper and DIFFERENT than I anticipated.
Each scene is well nuanced with just the right amount of detail to put me at the supermarket and then the restaurant, the parking lot and then home in the first chapter.
I will continue.
Backed with pleasure.
A Zoomer

What a dramatic book! I wasn't sure about the use of tense and POV at the beginning but it grew on me and I got used to it. Not many people write like that so it stood out. I always enjoy different. The characters are fascinating, you explore relationships in the most extreme sense of the word. It's been done before but three chapters in to yours, I can say it hasn't been done like this before! I'd read more if I had time. Fiona really came alive for me, she's a great character!

Missy
Mark of Eternity

You are totally fantastic, Joanna! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my memoirs book? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

One chapter of this and I want to read the rest. Well done!

Different
Happy to back it
Eveleen
(Turning a new leaf)
Hope you'll read mine

I was enticed to read your book, as I often am, by your list of favorites. We seem to share a taste for unconventional, somewhat doomed romances, for painful but unavoidable relationships (Lolita, Time Traveler's Wife, Book Thief). I have added the McEwan book to my "must read" list on your recommendation :-). On to your work...you are a beautiful writer, quite certainly with your own sensibilities as far as how you want this thing to go (form, style, etc.). I have to say, 98% of the time, the second person perspective does not work for me and I struggled with it here in the beginning. I found that it was a little hard to process, along with the first person for Fiona. Eventually, when the story settled and spread out a bit (and the second person bits were fewer), I had an easier time with it. But in the beginning I felt that the perspectives distracted from the story, from the scene. Honestly, I feel that maybe this is a minor concern because everything else is so masterful. I love the concept for your story, that the characters meet back up, full of life experience and expectations. I love, of course, the idea of a ill-matched love affair, the student/mentor theme intertwined. You definitely create a mood and your writing seems to delve so completely into Fiona that we can feel her breathing from the start. Great use of searing details, really just an excellent read.

---Mary
The Qualities of Wood

Stylish and accomplished writing that exudes confidence and control...definitely one of the best I've read on this site. Deserves to do very well but don't hold your breath!
Cheers
Stewart

Dear Joanna, I love about Fiona's dad teaching her to peel potatoes :) - my dad taught me to hold the potato in one hand & pull the peeler toward myself, starting at the far end :) - 55 years ago. :) Your pitch prepared me to read what would happen in your story & your crisp dialogue & paragraph made for a nice smooth read through chapter 10. :) The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but turns out rotten. :) I"ve backed your book :) - could you please take just a moment to back my memoirs book? :) Thanks so very much. :) Love, Susie :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."

Joanna,
Different has an unusual romance which suits the title. For this type of forbidden attraction to last so many years, the characters must have complex psychologies which could benefit from psychotherapy. But as romance stories go, the strangeness of these attractions makes compelling reading. Backed with pleasure.

A nice, crisp, get-to-it style of turning a phrase and relaying story elements...and some skillful character development. Good beginning.....

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created a most memorable main character. I also like your use of the first person narrative voice as this allows you to convey her thoughts and feelings. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing makes your work a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

:) comment to follow - read & commented on 1 day later :)