Lost Souls

What a cast of characters! Lost Souls, indeed! This reads a bit like a cross between The Postman Always Rings Twice and Body Heat. A great, good beginning to a noir crime of passion type tale where everyone has ulterior motives. I really feel for Claudia, and totally understand her transformation from naive woman searching for love in all the wrong places, to calculating sociopath, due to her duel tragedies of rape and involvement with unfaithful and self-serving James. I really like the jangly interplay between all fatally-flawed players.
Good writing, tight plot. This could end up as a hyper-gory bloodbath with no one left standing, or any of a dozen other fantastic, heart in your throat endings when you have a set-up as compelling as this. Hope you've carried on and finished the whole story!

I wanted to read Lost Souls because I love deeply emotional stories. The theme of the unborn child being killed was also something that pulled me in as it has a little in common with my book Pain in which a child is killed, albeit accidentally. I like your writing style. It flows really well and held my attention. I really felt for Claudia. The feelings of bitterness anger and resentment that she is feeling just jumps out of the page. What a heartbreaking situation to be put in. Added with the rape this is a real mix of human emotions. Well done and six stars. I have put Lost Souls on my watchlist because I want to go back to it and find out what happens to James. Something nasty I hope!

Kim (Pain)

This is a good read. The characters drew me in and kept me reading. After chapter 1, I just had to see what this deeply hurt woman would do next. Then, James was so repelling I wondered why on Earth Claudia would stay around such scum...

The only thing I was bothered by is the fact that by Chapter 3 she seems to have gotten over the horrible rape event she went through. It's almost as if it would be better to not have her go through that at all but it would contradict the Full Pitch and theme, so perhaps this, the trauma of the rape needs more development.

Otherwise, it's quite engaging!

Ana V. Davidov
'Be a Cupcake. Save the World.'

Just finished all five chapters, had to keep reading to see what happened next. Its a great story and characters are believable. I can't wait to see how things work out. I like the pace of the story. Claudia is a likable character if not a bit unstable and James is a piece of work. Poor Danny and Andrea, I'm hoping they fall in love and run off together.
I wish you the very best with this book and look forward to reading more.
Olive Field.
Book- Borrowed Light.

Jim seems like a nice guy and Claudia is a bit needy for me.... ;P Okay, I am astounded at how good this is. I like to see the dark undertones in the story, the angst draws you deeper, the longing and hunger of being the one instead of the other one by Cladia is stated perfectly. You get big props from me!

There is a lot of emotion in this, especailly I thought with the opening, and I liked that we were'nt told initially that what the issue was. As for James, well no empathy for him what so-ever. I think you have drawn your charachters well and I like the dialogue. I thought the voice works well for this type of tale and you've gotta love a woman with revenge on her mind.

One suggestion I'd like to make though, is if you 'sat down' you don't need the 'down' sat implies down. And when you say Claudia changes the subject, I don't think you need to tell us...we can tell by the dialogue this happens good luck with....watching at the moment, until I can move some other books off my shelf.

Good luck with this.

well christina....though topic seems to common...after going through the first two chapters finding it little different....guess when complete reading the book....will find it completely different..

well christina....though topic seems to common...after going through the first two chapters finding it little different....guess when complete reading the book....will find it completely different..

interesting name you have given to the book...let me read n see if the content is also interesting...backed your book..

i like this, especially the opening paragraphs- they drew me in instantly. but i hate james, what a heartless person! i want to slap him for being so careless. and i feel so bad for claudia, the poor girl, but she seems brave. one thing that bugged me a little was how you star a lot of the sections, not a big deal but its just my taste and me being picky. other than that its a great story.
good luck with this,
melissa

Powerful writing about an emotionally-charged subject, but you pull it off beautifully. The short introductory sections make the story accessible and easy to fall into. I also like the underlying tone of menace/darkness in her character - especially enjoyed the 'glaring eyes staring back at her' in her mirror - poignant and ominous.

Will be reading more, but for now highly rated,

TJB

Here it goes :)

I read it all in one sit, despite the headache. Excellent storytelling.
People that think important things that are not... Emotions that drive them all the way to murder. It can happen and you made me believe so (unfortunately). All four of the characters have been given depth, and I personally ended the excerpt wondering how important Danny would be as the story unfolds. You have a talent for emotional pinpointing in your writing (the serious one at least, hohoho).
A thing to reconsider perhaps is the way you chose to structure the first scenes. Starting with the state of mind of Claudia and always ending with her making a decision of importance. In these first scenes it seemed that the decision of importance was the same, and wondered if it would be more useful for you to bring these decisions in one scene. The first one would be the one I would choose. I would make her take the decision on the doctor's desk and I would only use the scenes that follow to show that decision. The way she talked to her colleague, Danny etc without explaining further.
Your call.
In case you upload more of it, I will definitely go on, so please inform me if you do. Keep writing!
6 stars... :)

you suggested i read your first book about toilet humours...well i hate toilet humours but this one is a good story. i don't have enough credit to read it entirely but from the first chapter i get the drift of the story...keep it up

I read the first chapter. Really, really good! Somehow it reminds me of my book, affairs, unwanted pregnancy....I really feel for Claudia, the MC comes across with real heartache of being the other woman! I have rated it well and added it to my WL.
Regards, Red

I read the entire thing and loved it. I enjoy the way you write so fluidly and pull the reader into the story. The typical story of cheating with a twist one doesn't expect. I did notice a few spelling mishaps and the odd sentence here n there that could be corrected...but, I'm not one to nitpick little things that will be caught in the final edit.

I like the way you describe/portray the characters. The reader has a clear visual of each. James sounds like they typical cheater who doesn't understand how he could end up in the mess he's in. It is so lifelike its uncanny. He has it all, yet wants more and uses his looks and charm to play in life. Andrea, the wife who suspects but is fighting to believe in her marriage and struggles with her insecurities. Claudia's strength and resolve-I can see how her feelings twist inside when she endures so much pain and disregard from James. And Danny, the smitten man who would do anything for Claudia...that is almost stalker material.

I can honestly say i can't wait to find out the outcome. The pace is good, dialogue is on mark, the style is easy reading-rated top notch for the story. I can definately see a movie someday about this.

Good luck
Wendy
'And When'

Hi Chrissy, been so quiet lately. I´m putting Lost Souls on my watchlist. Being doing some house cleaning and dusting, making more space.

Christina,

I've read two chapters, and I really like it. The premise is something a lot would identify with and understand. Very Chic lit, with love, and what goes wrong with it, the trio, and a good outcome ...I hope. Will read some more. But I think although this needs some polishing up, maybe structure, I can see a film here, with Hugh Grant....not sure as James or Danny yet. I will Watchlist it, with the hope of shelving it soon. I think it definitely deserves a chance. You should promote it. Keep re-editing it so that it comes up on the top of the latest books.

The pace is good, your easy style, good dialogue makes it promising.

Best Wishes
Marilyn x

Dear Christina,

You raise an important issue about the saying of "love." How do we really know when someone says that they love you that they really do? I like stories that help me think, and yours is a memorable story and something to meditate upon. Usually with sex, I never equate it with love. And, your characters in this book are the kinds of lost souls as you say. Thanks.

Billy M.

Its very short Christina. Doing it help me understand paragraph and scene construction a bit better. Though it isn't my story, like your book, there's a lot I could do with the story and may continue writing it.
http://www.authonomy.com/books/28688/printed-words-on-empty-pages-/read-book/?chapterid=294391#chapter

Dear Christina, I love your plot of Claudia of what she will do for revenge, being in love with James, a married man & his supposed failed promises. :) Your crisp dialogue & paragraphs moved me rapidly through chapter 6, not to mention Claudia's problems & her contrivances to get even. :) I felt sorry for James' wife, that he had her duped, too. :( His reasoning that life is a cabaret & his unfaithfulness to her, deep down I was hoping that he would change or get his comeuppance. :) I have read & commented on your book & put it on my watchlist, to read & to at least 24 hour back when space opens on my bookshelf. :) I have also gold ******-rated your book - could you please ****** & back my memoirs/testimony book? :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. every ******-ing & backing moves our books closer to the editor's desk :) - click on author's name, scroll down & click on their book cover or title :) - & away you go :)
None of this comment is copy/pasted & is written my best from my heart. :)

:) comment to follow after I've read your book - read & commented on 7 hours later :)