Billy

I started reading your book because I noticed that the first chapter was set in a courtroom. I write about gangs, but have chosen to not do the court scene, but was still curious at how you did your one. I thought it was good, it flowed and I liked that in the story Billy is given an option to sign up. In New Zealand there is also options for some offenders were they are sent to a type of miltary camp, but in Billy's situation it's the real army. I don't have time right now to read chapter 2, but will another day as I'm curious as to how this part of your story progresses, and whether Billy adapts to military life. It was a nice touch when Billy was willing to sign the agreement without even having read it. Basically in his situation, I suppose his reasoning has a certain amount of logic.

Anyway, I'll let you know what I think of the next chapter when I read it. Kind regards, Marita.

Ladies and Gentleman, I received the very sad news this morning that Colin Theakston aka Colt the author of this work has passed away.

My condolences to his wife, family and friends.

Soooz

I read all four chapters tonight. This is a well-written, intriguing story, and I will look for later chapters to be posted. You have managed to get us through the introduction in a short amount of time - no wasted words here. Your witing experience shows. Dialogue is true, characters are well-formed, descriptions are clear without being overdone. I am backing based on this small read - and awarding stars. Write some more - and I'll comment again.

Patricia West Hays
The Witness Tree

If you have any time at all, I would appreciate your taking the time to read a part of my book and rating it as you feel it deserves. Thanks.

This is an original idea and deserves development. I think it would help though if you restructured it a little, shortened the build-up and exposition, and posted some more of the story, so that you end up with Billy arriving at the centre in chapter 2 and having his first adventure in chapter 3. The information currently in chapter 2 could be addressed later. Best of luck with this.

You are totally fantastic, Colt!! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my memoirs/testimony book? :) God bless you. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. I just looked to see if I had ******-ed your book & it is ******-rated (6 gold ******'s) :) - thank you for ******-ing mine, too. :) Every ****** -ing & backing moves our books closer to the editor's desk :) I want to ask you if you could please keep my book on your bookshelf as long as possible because I'm 12 from the editor's desk & trying to be in the top 5 to be chosen, the end of November :) - I had a mini-stroke Nov. 10 with slurred speech for an hour & numbness of tongue still & over 20 smaller ones where I couldn't speak since & I"d sure like to cross the finish line of the editor's desk after 8-1/2 months trying on authonomy. :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me :) - I have lost 3 sisters to strokes & my last sister, Mary had 2 heart attacks earlier this year.

Dear Colt, Well, here I am reading & commenting on your 2nd book. :) Your pitch is concise in preparing me for young offender, Billy & his being recruited to help in natural disaster areas. :) Your extremely crisp dialogue & paragraphs helped me to zoom right through chapter 4 of Billy's adventure. :) Their barracks reminds me of summer camp. :) Great that he stood up to the bully on the get-go :) - & that he had a friend to back him up. :) I am so happy to have read your new book & I know that you will finish it well. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. I have gold *******-rated your book :) - could you please ****** & back my memoirs book & read my profile to see my worse lupus mini-strokes & that you will help me over the finish line of the editor's desk. :) Thank you from the very bottom of my heart. :)