Death and the Tango in Madeira

DEATH AND THE TANGO
This book is an interesting read. I like the understated humor (the cigarette case bought in a gift shop; the simple way you say, “Robinson got himself murdered”. It’s not a fast paced writing style but is an intriguing one as it lets your reader really get pulled into your characters and the story. I’m trying to choose a place for vacation next summer and your descriptions made me want to visit Madeira. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

Just let us know when this is published old chap. I'll buy it for all my reading friends at Christmas. They'll *love* it.

~AudreyB
Forgiveness Fits

I've read this beginning to end, and there's a few places the author needs to work on but altogether its a long afternoon's read cozied up with w hot cuppa. Very good work.

Jim,

I finished Tango... It might not be to everyone's taste, but it certainly was to mine. Really, really enjoyed it. And the ending put a lump in my throat.

SPOILER ALERT - read no further, if you don't want to know the twists and turns.

Along about the point where the peasants said the angel roared, I began thinking aeroplane. But must confess, I didn't figure out how it was going to be used. You surprised me with Pennyweight being the murderer, but I could see where you'd built the possibility into his character.

And.... Margaret's statement that they'd stolen a baby from a thief. Oh my, that landed with a thump in the gut.

Very, very, very well done.

The only glitch I noticed was that you had Michael thinking about getting Lavinia's address and writing to her (>32 or so - Authonomy numbering) after you'd already shown me that correspondence. Very easy matter to fix.

Would love to see this keep climbing in ranking. Now, I am going to take a look at your other books.

Ann - Absence of Grace

Interesting....but not my style. Good writing skills, great with words, and painting scenes. Good luck with this piece!

D. S. Hale

Jim,

I've now read through 29, and I'm thoroughly enjoying this. The manuscript is very "clean".. I rarely notice any typos or other types of errors, and I've gotten to where I'd rather read than stop to point some minor thing out.

I enjoyed the play. It does sound like something GBS might write. And I'm also enjoying the GBS correspondence sprinkled throughout. My only comment in this regard is that I was disappointed that the last time GBS mentioned Michael it was only in passing, and he labeled him as a bounder. Since the two have now interacted, I would like GBS to comment in more depth on Michael, who I am finding to be an extremely appealing character, one you've convinced me has a good heart. Evidence of this includes his letter to Lavinia and his attitude toward his father and people he considers to be dependent on the House of Pinfold, and the way he treats Pennyweight.

I like Michael despite his also being a bit of a thief and a con, not to mention seducer, because you've also convinced me he would not hurt someone who either didn't deserve it or was in some way helpless... although there is the not insignificant matter of Angelica. Hmmm.

Ann - Absence of Grace

Jim, Here's what your book has caused me to do so far...
Decide to read the whole thing, a few chapters a day
Look up Madeira on Google... where it is, what it looks like. Decided it looks a lot like St. Lucia (Caribbean) and the terraces are similar so some we've seen in S. America in places like Peru. The pictures on the tourist site helped me better picture your settings.

As I continue to read Death and the Tango in Madeira a few chapters at a time, I thought I would send along comments periodically.

The Chap numbers refer to those on Authonomy. So here's 6 -10

Chap 6 The man with capacious nostrils ( love this) is the one who had the pub and first talks about horses, then these characteristics seem to be transferred to the priest. I like the priest's observations... that Johnny has cruel eyes... very well done. But was confused about who was saying what when.

Chap 7 The entire encounter with GBS and then with Margaret are exceptionally well done. Really enjoying the GBS connection since my husband and I have gone to Niagara-on-the-Lake (Canada) for their Shaw festival for years. He does write talky plays!

"In light of what was to happen... then you go on to give a bit of Pouco Pedro history. But the foretelling statement bounces us out of the present of the story, and it isn't necessary... just say that Pedro might not take money now but the first time they met etc.

Chap 8
The order of things is always an issue in a story like this. But I would have liked to see this GBS reply after Elizabeth's letter

Chap 9
Sonnie's letter
Opening made me chuckle
I assume you're leaving out the apostrophes on purpose?

Chap 10
Arrived on the island – rather than arrived in?

Enjoyed the at odds conversation between Michael and Mainwaring.

I'm off to read some more.

Ann

What a great concept for a novel. It's always such a delight to come across true originality on this site.
And, phew, it's well written with a good flow and pace.
I'm looking forward to reading the paper version of this.

Good luck!
Diana
Pascual's Birthday

Jim,

I absolutely love this book and kept reading until the battery on my computer ran out and kicked me off. I love Michael's "voice" and I thought the letters in Chap 4 & 5 were brilliantly done.

There are so many delightful bits it would take considerable time to note them all, but I particularly liked the "amiably mad" in the first paragraph, the description of Pennyweight, and the definition of melancholy in chap 2, and the first paragraph in which you talk about Dr. Crispin. I laughed at the bit about aiding the "sense of wonder" about why anyone liked wine, the bit about the cigarette case, and the definition of contempt, and on and on!!

Great hook at end of 2.

One picky point.. line: pinnace despatched by Reid's who... suggest a which instead of a who.

The only places where I lost my place a bit were the following:

Where did the three have tea after the ship docked?... I didn't see where they had disembarked, and yet, I think the tea was at Reid's. Very minor quibble, and easily fixed.

The other confusion was when Michael arrived home. The paragraph describing the fountain was confusing.. at first thought the boy and the oxen were part of the fountain! Again, easily fixed.

Loved the description of the father as a chocolate confection, although confess at first I thought you were implying he was dark-skinned. And the lipstick was a wonderful hook. I simply have to keep reading to find out what happens to these two. I liked that Michael seemed not to be contemptuous of his odd father.

This is a wonderful story, and I'm glad to see it's getting positive attention and moving up in rank. I'm pleased to offer my backing. And I'm so glad you've posted the complete story, because this is one I will be coming back to read more.

Ann - Absence of Grace

This is not my normal genre, so I can't offer any real insight on making it better, but I will say the writing itself is solid. I enjoy the description, and the dialog seems right on track with the time frame and characters. Highly starred. Best of luck!

M.E. Shekinah
Albert: A Gray Matter

This is an absolute and utter delight. 'The Mysterious Fairy Stiles' and 'Miss Terry Ferrat Steals' – brilliant. And I loved the line, "I'm a thief, not a burglar." I've had this backed and will back it again at a later date.

Highly recommended reading!

Lovely. I noticed this on another bookshelf and thought I would give it a go. I am pleased i did. Backed.

Pete

I saw this recommended in the forum and came to take a look. I'm so glad I did - clever, careful and immensely witty. I do like the way you've taken real characters and tangled them into your plot (are the GBS letters real? One at least seemed vaguely familiar. Doesn't matter - I'm just curious. And if not, very, very impressed at your ventriloquism). I am enjoying the relaxed pace of it - for a murder mystery it develops slowly but it's not really a murder mystery, more a character study and invocation of time and place. Particularly appealing is the slow drawing back as Pinfold reveals himself.

Nitpicks? None really, except to say that if Pinfold thinks folk dancing respectable he's seen the wrong sort.

Many stars, backing to follow.

Inventive, accomplished, elegant, hilariously entertaining ...

Eddie Crockett
THE SALLEE ROVERS

Brilliant best thing Ive read on here for ages six stars easily
Sue knowing Liam Riley

Prose that flows along easily with relaxed elegance and a seemingly instinctive feeling for the period, post WW1 attitudes. 'A writer, for God's sake.'
An audible and amiable voice. Well-researched and confidently narrated. Can I fault this? I'm trying, but I can't yet.
This writing seems to me to be of a professional and publishable standard, so I'll give it 5 stars for now. And I'll read on.

Hello Jim ,great title ,original and engaging concept ,though I do detect a slight air of Evelyn Waugh , but its very cleverly done with a droll perspective and also very literate and well-written, you've clearly done this before and quite successfully.I like the cover as well , I'd be interested to know how GBS appears in the narrative - it reminds me of that Stoppard play about Zurich during the 1stWW , with Lenin,Joyce and someone who is producing an amateur dramatic production of 'The Importance of Being Earnest ',who buys some trousers from James Joyce - I'm afraid I,m the kind of person who finds the word trousers inherently amusing.Would you be kind enough to take a look at my novel 'A Buccaneer',about Pirates in the 17th century,thanks very much ,Strachan Gordon

Jim,
Death and the Tango in Madeira is a one of a kind story filled with the suspense needed for its genre. The historical context must have required a tremendous amount of research to craft such a believable account with realistic dialogue and richly detailed descriptions. The cryptic and convoluted plot is sure to enchant mystery readers who are drawn to this type of riveting narrative.

Walden Carrington
Titanic: Rose Dawson's Story

"Death and the Tango in Madeira" - Jim Williams. I read the 1st 2 chapters and scanned several comments. You do an excellent job of character description. Your style is Hemingwayesque in some ways. Good research on the time and places. Bookshelf for character development and writing. One suggestion: put the forward in with the first chapter - smoother read.

Gideon ("Thrill Writer's Remorse")

hi Jim,
How come your book is on this site? It is witty, humorous, insightful, well-researched and grand, and not only that, we're getting time/space removal while watching our own times being discussed and analysed. This is brilliant writing, bordering on genius I'd say, in the way you slip in the era's contemporary problems and make them actual and modern! I enjoyed the hints about capitalism being a driving motor in the happenings.
The choice of characters is superb and the mixing of famous and mundane is handled sensitively and sharp-eyed. God, that Margaret is a beast, and I'm wondering what her game is. Manipulation is written all over her silk dress, as coty whafts away from under her hem. Will read on, as this promises to deliver a perfect plot.

I am not usually drawn into Historical but the book cover caught my interest. I read the first 2 chpaters and enjoyed the read. I rated the book and plan on returning for more!
Red

Jim, well, you are no poor bloody boxwallah's whoreson... that's for damned sure!! Pitch perfect, each character with a visible personality, and each with an agenda peculiar to the times, and all keenly observed by a laissez-faire hero in Michael Pinfold. I am wondering if he is the actual whoreson... given the penchant of his ailing father.

A comedy of manners and murder, of times gone by, yet with a razor-sharp humour that any modern novelist or playwright would kill for. All set in an island thought of as somewhat staid these days, but an exotic outpost brought to tropical, heat-simmering life here.

I can only hope this will not go to waste here on Authonomy, especially with the six stars I am giving it - all I can give, as well as a shelf spot as soon as allowed.

From Kay
(Waystation to Prosperity Street)

Okay, here goes. This is one of the best-written things I've seen here. It's what they call in Hollywood "high concept" - and a brilliant one at that. The writing, the characterizations, the beginnings of the plot are really well-executed. I've only read one chapter, and this is one of the few things I've read on the site that I'll read a whole lot more of. I'm giving you a very rare six stars, and will move to my shelf as soon as I can, probably in a few days. One tiny quibble - you describe the captain as a "cool customer" which struck me as both a cliche and an example of "telling, not showing." You can do a great job of letting us draw that conclusion about him, you don't need to telegraph it. Otherwise, really fantastic. Love it.
Best,
Andi
ANIMAL CRACKER

Bravo and best Regards! Jedward (French Roast and Lingerie)

Have six-starred this. Accomplished. Faultlessly pitched dialogue. Intriguing set-up. Period unobtrusively conveyed. Style that speaks of a lifetime of reading absorbing the masters yet that has acquired its own distinctive, non-derivative voice - though do I detect in the faultless prose an especial liking for Waugh? Just a guess.
I must say though that I do wonder what you're doing on Authonomy, since you indicate yourself that there is little correlation between quality and ranking. I think too that your book is a leisurely read to be savoured, which doesn't exactly fit the demands of commercial fiction today (take a look at the only two novels that have made it on this site with HC, and after so many years too) - and I can't imagine that with the publishing success you've already had you need to hope for an agent to spot you, as some do on here.
Still you must be on here for a reason and I hope my six-ing will help improve your progress.
xavant
X.V. Anthony
That Certain Feeling

Hi Jim,

Surprised that the book is not much higher up where it deserves to be. I like your writing style and the old English charm which is a rarity in modern times - which by the way lends to the perfection in the settings and characterisation. I wonder how you managed to relive events that happened so many decades ago with such clarity and authenticity - that's the best part of the read.

I have showered stars over it and backed it so that it can move up the rankings.

All the best.

Jay Adiyarath
EXPIRY DATE

this is a grand book . i have'nt inished it yet i will . .....

I have finished the book. I am an avid reader of mysteries but never once predicted what was to come in this book. The whole book was very entertaining and beautifully written with so many wonderful quotes that I would have to give a line by line critique to name all the phrases and sentences that were just perfect at inducing emotion. I also really like the way you wove other formats into the novel. I truly love this book.

Johanna

Well, you had me at the first sentence of Chapter 1. "... with the confidence of the amiably mad" is just the sort of phrase that tells me (a) I'm going to like what I'm about to read, and (b) that you know what you're doing.

Time constraints at the moment won't allow me to read any more than the opening chapter but I'm sufficiently assured by what I've read that "Madeira" fully deserves my support, so I'll back it now and Comment further when I've returned from holiday.

I was doubtful until I read, "For we have no message to convey, merely a burden to discharge." That is one of those sentences that is put together in an unexpected way that clearly communicates meaning but also makes me catch my breath. I have read through autho chapter 10 and hope to continue through the book.

I really liked this. I read up to authonomy chapter 11 and the writing is just fabulous. The story of the murder took a while to kick off - but that didn't matter I was absorbed in the descriptions and setting. It really felt like the place - exotic with that old British character about it.

What struck me reading through it was how well you captured the times, both in the narrator's voie and in the dialogue - thats something I've struggled with in writing 'Comerford', which is about 10 years earlier. Yet, it seemed to flow so naturally from you and with a poetic air about it. Various thoughts strewn about in it are particularly interesting - one that springs to mind is that one about countries in the mind - there were others, but I haven't got a mind for remembering things like this, only being enthralled by them.

I haven't really got anything negative to say. I got a little lost at the beginning of chapter 2 I recall - it felt like someone was coming arriving at the island when of course Michael was already at the island from chapter 1. And I can't quite figure out where the affair with Margaret originated and came from with regards to the story.

What I particularly liked was the letters from Shaw. I don't think they're original are they? If they aren't then you did a fabulous job in capturing both his wit and his humour - which you also managed in the dialogue.

With regard to Michael he was very easy to empathise with. I'm glad you didn't add the rather overdone motif of giving him horrendous flashbacks of the war, but spoke of it in a detached way. I felt that was a more affective insight into the character. Fairbrother and Pennyweather were particularly interesting fellows as were Teddy and the father. Margaret was a strong individual against the more reserved and quiet Michael - a good working contrast.

All of the characters were unique and interesting in their own right. The dialogue of each was independent in style and flowed naturally.

I will be reading on, but my last word is that the high standard of writing - which I immediately liked from the opening sentence - was maintained throughout all I've read so far. There were no typos, as far as I can recall, and perhaps one or two awkward or badly phrased sentences. The story went at an excellently slow and relaxed pace and I felt, as a reader, that I had really settled in by the end of chapter 2 to the whole setting of the story.

Backed with pleasure and I shall return. If there are any questions you want on what I've read so far or on any subsequent parts of the story, please let me know so that I may be more useful for you.

Joe

John,
Many thanks for your kind comments. The reason my book is on so few shelves is that I have not put much effort into supporting it by networking. I don't regard Authonomy as offering a sufficnetly realistic basis for getting published commensurate with the effort. I am conscious how, only recently, Susie Gullick, having ferociously promoted her book to the editor's desk, has nevertheless had it turned down. I've had nine novels published. I should be content to give others a chance. If you are itnerested in knowing more and reading a sample of my last published book, check my website. Good luck with yours. I'll leave it on my shelf to give you a decent chance.

Re Agatha Christie, I am making a jke. At the date of the story she is still unknown and people cannot get the name of her first book (The Mysterious Affair at Styles) correct, and so failt to understand what it is about (The Mysterious Fairy Stiles).
Jim

What a beautiful, well-crafted story from intriguing cover and pitches to the wonderfully drawn setting and characters. The reader becomes absorbed in the relationships between the well developed characters and the dramatic tension works its way in through little twists and shocks and chapter endings that work a treat. I especially liked: ‘Is my lipstick smudged?’ and ‘Bless you, Robinson, old man, he said.’ The whole thing so far is full of ‘fun and surprises’, as someone has commented already, but is worth repeating. (Just starting 12 Shaw’s one act play and there we are, by jove, Robinson appears as a character!). Some of Michael’s thoughts as a disillusioned soldier are just knockout: eg ‘No, I don’t despise P. And his kind. They have mountains of corpses to their credit.’ ‘Imperial trade in frozen lamb and cotton good was the reward of victory, the cause for which millions had died: a grocer’s account paid with a butcher’s bill.’ You have to admire such sentences and wonder how the author came by them.
I must admit the first letter to Shaw was a surprise but fitted the plot perfectly, especially when I cheated and read 47. Would like to add my Bravo! to someone else’s (That’s what tempted me.)
One question: You have Michael (as narrator) refer to Mrs Christie in chap 2 as ‘The lady novelist was standing at the rail with a man...’, whereas before and later he tends to dismiss her as a writer of ‘a book for kiddies’. ‘Lady novelist’ seems to carry more esteem? Intentional?
Anyway, I am enjoying this immensely and do not understand why it is only on one shelf at the moment. I will keep iton mine for some time. And to think you have a doctorate in something or other and can give sound advice on being a charlatan!
Great writing, Jim
With some envy, John

What a beautiful, well-crafted story from intriguing cover and pitches to the wonderfully drawn setting and characters. The reader becomes absorbed in the relationships between the well developed characters and the dramatic tension works its way in through little twists and shocks and chapter endings that work a treat. I especially liked: ‘Is my lipstick smudged?’ and ‘Bless you, Robinson, old man, he said.’ The whole thing so far is full of ‘fun and surprises’, as someone has commented already, but is worth repeating. (Just starting 12 Shaw’s one act play and there we are, by jove, Robinson appears as a character!). Some of Michael’s thoughts as a disillusioned soldier are just knockout: eg ‘No, I don’t despise P. And his kind. They have mountains of corpses to their credit.’ ‘Imperial trade in frozen lamb and cotton good was the reward of victory, the cause for which millions had died: a grocer’s account paid with a butcher’s bill.’ You have to admire such sentences and wonder how the author came by them.
I must admit the first letter to Shaw was a surprise but fitted the plot perfectly, especially when I cheated and read 47. Would like to add my Bravo! to someone else’s (That’s what tempted me.)
One question: You have Michael (as narrator) refer to Mrs Christie in chap 2 as ‘The lady novelist was standing at the rail with a man...’, whereas before and later he tends to dismiss her as a writer of ‘a book for kiddies’. ‘Lady novelist’ seems to carry more esteem? Intentional?
Anyway, I am enjoying this immensely and do not understand why it is only on one shelf at the moment. I will keep iton mine for some time. And to think you have a doctorate in something or other and can give sound advice on being a charlatan!
Great writing, Jim
With some envy, John

I read your foreward and first chapter.

General comments: An engaging start. An observant, charming main character. Vivid descriptions. You have a talent for turning phrases. Good tension. Good pacing.

Specific comments on the foreward:
1) No nits.

Specific comments on chapter one:
1) ' ... when drinking of madeira had declined while production continued.' In this context 'madeira' is a proper noun and should be capitalized.
2) 'Pennyweight gave an evasive response.' Are you referring to what Pennyweight said? If so, put this evaluation after the response. If you are referring to something Pennyweight did physically to indicate 'evasiveness,' then show the actual physical response so the reader can experience along with Michael.
3) 'We saw eye to eye on this - my talent lying in the freelance direction without all the red tape being actually employed.' Is this dialogue or narrative? It reads like Michael's thoughts to me, yet it's indicated as dialogue.
4) In the paragraph that begins 'Not a one. I had a word with a steward - ... ' you use dashes to indicate hesistant speech. In my opinion, ellipses ( ... ) are more appropriate as a dash is easily confused with an em-dash which indicates interrupted speech.
5) ' ... and it was dazzling.' Technically, 'it' refers to 'dress.' Is that what you intended?
6) Great end of chapter hook. Who wouldn't turn the pages to find out what comes next?

I hope this critique helps to further polish your all important first chapters. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Would you please take a look at "Savannah Fire?"

Have a sterling day.

Al

One word of description: Wonderful.

Jim,
Just spent the last couple of hours with your book and read to the end of ch6, which I think was ch3...but anyway... I appreciated the foreward, as for me it set the scene, giving necessary background before the tale began, but also fixing it firmly amidst real events/people of that period. I enjoy the relaxed, unhurried way in which you write, the subtle humour and the adept characterisation. Particularly enjoyed the relationship between Michael's father and his "man" and also the hints that Michael (despite his quiet observation of others) may not be the gentleman that he portrays. His affair with his best friends wife and the dubious offloading of wine all showing that there's more to him than initially meets the eye. An intelligent read, which I'm sure will do well.
Babs

Hi Jim,
For some reason, my comments on this book have shown up under " How to be a Charlatan". Apologies.
Carl

Wonderful inspiring title and the jacket very seductive - that said this is just the kind of novel that I am drawn to. You are a professional and it shows! I will surely be buying this very soon.

Jim,
This was a pleasure to read and I can’t believe no one’s snapping it up. It reminded me of Farrell’s ‘Troubles’ – that after the war feel – but in your case without an air of dreaminess bordering on the surreal.
I’ll confine my comments to the opening chapter.
I think you just about get away with Pinfold’s perceptions – ‘for we have no message ..’ and ‘melancholy to be enjoyed to the full’ etc – in the sense that if it had continued throughout the chapter he would have been in danger of being a ‘know all’ with an apercu ready for every occasion. It’s a particularly evident trait given your opening quote from Greene.
I love the descriptions in general and the suit in particular.
I hope that hereafter the Druids and Masons are significant – if not the second mention and the Advanced Thinking seems a bit over egged.
‘He would be come across…’ is okay but teeters against the smoothness of the rest of the prose. I know it’s Pinfold’s style but even here his feel for and use of language has been established and the phrase seems infelicitous.
Beautifully handled hook at the end of the chapter.
And overall a cracking read.
In fact the whole thing feels like the love child of Wodehouse and MacDonald-Fraser. With a steelier touch than W and a foot more firmly in reality than MF.
I wish you the very best of luck. Excellent, professional stuff.
Geoff

Thanks for the kind comments. This novel was my fifth murder mystery (the other four having been published). The critics liked the published books but none of them did well. If you are interested in more background see my website jimwilliamsbooks.com. I have another completed novel that is doing the rounds and I hope to post details in due coruse. Good luck with your own stuff.

Jim

Jim,
This was a pleasure to read and I can’t believe no one’s snapping it up. It reminded me of Farrell’s ‘Troubles’ – that after the war feel – but in your case without an air of dreaminess bordering on the surreal.
I’ll confine my comments to the opening chapter.
I think you just about get away with Pinfold’s perceptions – ‘for we have no message ..’ and ‘melancholy to be enjoyed to the full’ etc – in the sense that if it had continued throughout the chapter he would have been in danger of being a ‘know all’ with an apercu ready for every occasion. It’s a particularly evident trait given your opening quote from Greene.
I love the descriptions in general and the suit in particular.
I hope that hereafter the Druids and Masons are significant – if not the second mention and the Advanced Thinking seems a bit over egged.
‘He would be come across…’ is okay but teeters against the smoothness of the rest of the prose. I know it’s Pinfold’s style but even here his feel for and use of language has been established and the phrase seems infelicitous.
Beautifully handled hook at the end of the chapter.
And overall a cracking read.
In fact the whole thing feels like the love child of Wodehouse and MacDonald-Fraser. With a steelier touch than W and a foot more firmly in reality than MF.
I wish you the very best of luck. Excellent, professional stuff.
Geoff

Greetings, Jim, from across the pond. Death and the Tango is smoothly written but lacks dramatic tension. An ex-military officer seeking romance is drawn into solving a murder. Several character arcs are skilfully interwoven in an elevated language seldom found in novels. Much of it seems like idle conversation of travelers thrown together by the circumstances of a ship voyage. Very Un-Holmesian as a detective story but a merit it seems to me.
Skillfully written in the "off-the-nose" style recommended for screenwriting students in the U.S.A. and I'd recommend it to any student studying how to do that.
James

Thanks for your insightful comments. You are right that the book lacks dramatic tension in the ordinary way. I made a decision to tell the story at leisure and try to engage the eader with the characters, relationships and dialogue. Possibly a mistake :-)

Jim, from the evidence of your opening chapters, 'Death and the Tango in Madeira' is a very accomplished, polished, elegant piece of writing. You have a highly readable style. Being a lover of old-style novels set firmly in time and place, I like the authenticity and attention to detail on display here. You have a wonderful ear for dialogue, too - a real feature throughout - something which is sadly lacking in many contemporary novels. In short, this is a book I would definitely buy, and am more than happy to back.

Regards

NA 'The Butterfly and the Wheel'

Greetings, Jim, from across the pond. Death and the Tango is smoothly written but lacks dramatic tension. An ex-military officer seeking romance is drawn into solving a murder. Several character arcs are skilfully interwoven in an elevated language seldom found in novels. Much of it seems like idle conversation of travelers thrown together by the circumstances of a ship voyage. Very Un-Holmesian as a detective story but a merit it seems to me.
Skillfully written in the "off-the-nose" style recommended for screenwriting students in the U.S.A. and I'd recommend it to any student studying how to do that.
James

Hello there Jim,
Needless to add to the various favourable comments that you really know your stuff. But I am going to add that after reading the first and second chapters of the book, it is clear from my the view point of a reader, your story line flows well. The dialogue is realistic. The narratives tight and précis. I will of course give the book the stars that it deserves for now and back it soon as I can make a space for it on my bookshelf. At the the moment it will be on my WL.
Cheers and best of luck with your writing career.
Pamela 'THE OUTRAGE'

Many thanks. I hope that the example I sent you by way of explanation of my comments on adjectives and adverbs has been useful to you - if only to clarify the point.

Jim

Hello there Jim,
Needless to add to the various favourable comments that you really know your stuff. But I am going to add that after reading the first and second chapters of the book, it is clear from my the view point of a reader, your story line flows well. The dialogue is realistic. The narratives tight and précis. I will of course give the book the stars that it deserves for now and back it soon as I can make a space for it on my bookshelf. At the the moment it will be on my WL.
Cheers and best of luck with your writing career.
Pamela 'THE OUTRAGE'

Hi Jim,
I am in awe of the quality here. Loved the line: I watched Madiera rise, green and improbable, out of the morning and a quiet sea. You handle each voice splendidly. All likeable--good entertainment value, believable. Also liked: I was reminded of ducks swimming in flotilla, and other dry quips. Teddy's character. Kali's revenge. Father's affecting an air of incomprehension. Very insightful. I hope to reach such a standard some day. Will come back for more--for my own pleasure.
Regards,

Thanks for your generous comments. If you are interested to more background on my approach to writing, you might like to take a llok at my website: jimwilliamsbooks.com

Jim
John B Campbell

Hi Jim,
I am in awe of the quality here. Loved the line: I watched Madiera rise, green and improbable, out of the morning and a quiet sea. You handle each voice splendidly. All likeable--good entertainment value, believable. Also liked: I was reminded of ducks swimming in flotilla, and other dry quips. Teddy's character. Kali's revenge. Father's affecting an air of incomprehension. Very insightful. I hope to reach such a standard some day. Will come back for more--for my own pleasure.
Regards,
John B Campbell

Hi Jim,
Great first line. Marvelous internal reply.
Now: Pennyweight gave an evasive response. I think this could be shown more than told. Something to indicate character, a look of the eyes or a gesture. Yet, sometimes a bit of telling helps the pace. Great writing skill here all round. Love the concept of this book. Look forward to reading more. Starred and on my WL with intent.
Yours, John B Campbell . . . Walk to Paradise Garden

Ch 47 BRAVO! This is a book to be read on a long rainy afternoon with a glass of nice wine. Wonderful!

Thank you, Natasha. It was kind of you to read to the end. I have a published novel with a sample on my website: jimwilliamsbooks.com. THE ARGENTINIAN VIRGIN. I have promised my (small) publisher to do my best to promote it. It is frankly embarrassing.