The Impeccable Editor’s Guide to Writing (and Rewriting)
by The Impeccable Editor
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Part One
Introduction
Chapter One: Inception to Finale
Chapter Two: Establish your Credibility
Chapter Three: Fiction: Setting the Scene
Chapter Four: Vagueness into Clarity
Chapter Five: Dialogue
Chapter Six: Voice and Point of View
Part Two
Chapter One: Sentence Structure and Word Choice
Chapter Two: Punctuation and Grammar Review
Appendix: Sample Critiques
Introduction
Typing “The End” upon completion of a first draft can be an exhilarating experience, especially if the manuscript is a lengthy one. Congratulations! You have already achieved what many people only talk (or dream) about: writing. Give yourself a pat on the back, go drink a beer or walk on the beach, and take some deep breaths to clear your head before you come back, ready to assess your work with an objective, critical eye.
Geniuses who deliver flawless creations from the first page are rare; most writers can expect to revisit their words a number of times before they stop finding ways to improve a sentence, a paragraph, a chapter—all the more reason why, hopefully, you are writing about something that interests you. Not every project warrants spending a huge amount of time and energy polishing and refining, but proofreading is a good practice to develop. Before you hit “send,” scan your draft e-mails and attachments; you may catch errors that could have proved embarrassing or created confusion and misunderstanding. For long works, you are likely to rewrite your material several times before your job is done. Your care, or lack of it, will be evident in the quality of the finished product.
Some of the problems that signal poor writing, such as improper punctuation and incorrect grammar, are easy to spot; others are more subtle. A reader—or writer—may realize that a manuscript is lacking “something” but have difficulty identifying why she feels dissatisfied, even though the subject interests her. Perhaps the writer speaks in vague generalities or digresses too often from the main topic. Repetition of favorite words or phrases can become annoying, and the use of too many complex terms can bog down the flow. Are descriptions too sparse or too detailed? Is the pace too slow or too fast? Is the sentence structure sloppy? Does the story lack depth and seem superficial, so that even if the writing is excellent, you are left wondering whether there is a point?
You may have an important message to deliver or an intriguing tale to tell, but content alone is not enough; the manner in which it is presented can mean the difference between a best-selling book and a manuscript that lands in the slush pile. Likewise, a strong vocabulary and prodigious output are of little value if your style is dull, your organization poor, and your ideas ill-formed.
Working with an editor or a writing coach or teacher of some kind can help you become aware of habitual patterns in your writing. A good editor will give you tools for effective rewriting. A book cannot substitute for the personalized review of your work that an editor can provide; without reading your work, I cannot tell you whether your descriptions are effective or your characters well developed. I can, however, point out some of the common mistakes I see and give you examples of how to correct them.
This is not a book about the art of story-telling; I won’t be discussing plot devices or character arcs or turning points—not in detail, anyway. This is, primarily, a book about the basics of good writing. Nonetheless, some topics (such as point-of-view issues) will apply more to fiction than, say, writing a business plan. Whether you are writing an essay or a memoir or a biography, you are writing prose in a narrative mode of expression and some general guidelines apply.
Take your writing to the next level
People write for different reasons. For some, it’s a job; for others, a necessity—a creative outlet. Writing can be cathartic and creative and fun. You don’t need talent to write for your own amusement or to record your experiences and thoughts and feelings for your friends and family—they aren’t going to care about errors and repetitions; they care about you and they are interested in your stories and recollections. If, however, you are ready to advance to the next stage, and desire to bring your work to a larger audience, you need to learn about the craft of writing.
Some people are full of great ideas and stories but horrible at grammar and spelling and have little patience with managing “details.” Details matter. Don’t expect someone else to finish what you begin and fill in the gaps for you. Even if you are privileged to have a secretary, editor, or spouse who corrects your work, the more you learn to spot your own mistakes, the better your writing will become. The more changes you can make on your own, the more the finished product will reflect your unique voice, style, vision. The tighter your manuscript, the fewer changes an agent or editor will suggest.
In the beginning was the word
Everything in creation begins with a thought, an idea, an intention—a seed. A great idea is a starting point for a novel or screenplay, but it won’t necessarily be enough to hold a reader’s attention for an entire book or film. The germ of an idea must be developed into a story through a series of actions and events that form a plot, complete with interesting characters and compelling themes.
Have you ever watched the trailer for a feature film and been excited to see the picture, only to find that the best moments were all used in the trailer? Perhaps the premise is high-concept but other elements are weak and you leave the theater feeling a bit let-down. Great works of art are effective on every level; memorable stories are engaging and timeless. Perhaps you are not aiming for a Pulitzer Prize or writing “literary” fiction, but don’t you want to feel confident that your writing is the best it can be?
Remember that you are combining individual words to make sentences; those sentences are grouped into paragraphs, and soon all those paragraphs form the chapters that contain the heart and soul of your work. Do cut out unnecessary verbiage; make every word count. Don’t make your sentences so sparse that readers have to guess at your intended meaning; don’t overlook the words that serve as bridges and connect your sentences, paragraphs, and ideas. Do keep learning. If writing is an important part of your life, commit to improving your craft.
When I first started writing fiction, I began work on a novel. I attended writers’ conferences and learned about the nuts and bolts of storytelling—how to create believable characters and natural dialogue; the importance of understanding my characters’ needs and motivations; ways to increase the stakes and heighten tension. I knew exactly who my characters were, the setting in which they met, and how they would interact—but I didn’t know where the story was going, or how it ended. I had a lot of ideas about process, but no real destination. After working on it for a while, I put the novel aside and turned my attention to a different story, which I wrote as a screenplay. I still like the idea of my original story, and I may eventually return to it, but I think now that it might work best as a television series, with the ending left open.
As you can see, ideas may lend themselves better to some formats than others. Do you know what audience you seek to reach and the best vehicle for doing so? Will your work be performed by actors and, if so, is it suited for stage, television, or film? If you are writing a speech, your considerations will be different than if you are writing a short story. You may be able to say everything you want to say about some topics in a magazine article, while other ideas or scenarios require fuller exploration in a book or series of books.
A proposal for a nonfiction book is expected to include certain standard sections, as is an article for a professional journal. You can write fifteen minutes of notes and lyrics, but it probably won’t be a “song” any radio station will want to play. The category or genre in which you are writing and the intended purpose for the final product will shape your work and help you determine what content to include, the tone of the piece, and the perspective from which you write—an autobiography will use first person (“I”), an address that will be given to a graduating class or a manual that provides instruction may be addressed directly to the audience (“you”), a novel about a fictional character or a biography about a real person might use the third person (“he/she”). Allow the structure to guide you.
Structure as foundation
Advice about dramatic structure goes back at least as far as Aristotle, tutor to Alexander the Great. In Poetics, Aristotle observed that an effective story needs a beginning, a middle section, and an ending. Such a statement may seem obvious, but choosing the best place to begin requires careful consideration. The beginning will set the tone for the whole project; be mindful in your choice of opening images or statements.
Perhaps your main character was born during the Great Depression; even though the story is set in the 1960s, the forces that shaped the protagonist during her childhood are important for understanding her worldview. How will you convey that understanding to your audience? Will you begin the story at your heroine’s birth and describe the forces that shaped her values in sequential order, or will you start with the march upon Washington that landed her in jail, where she relates her tale to a cellmate? You know your main character or subject well, but not every detail is relevant to the themes you are exploring. You must decide how much background information is important for a reader to know in order to understand the implications of the events that occur as the action unfolds during the “middle” part of the story.
Likewise, stories have natural end-points that follow from the consequences of the characters’ words and actions. The story doesn’t simply stop, mid-sentence, at a random place that then becomes “the end” (although, it has been done. See The Rules of Attraction by Bret Easton Ellis) nor are new conflicts and dilemmas typically introduced after the dénouement—except, perhaps, when the author is paving the way for a sequel. The hero may continue to fight the good fight another day, but dragging out the ending beyond the conclusion and “unraveling” (dénouement derives from French desnouer, to untie, and Latin nodus, knot) of the various threads and themes that have been presented and resolved throughout the book detracts from readers’ enjoyment and satisfaction.
Formulas exist because they imitate natural rhythms and patterns that are part of the human experience. Each day has a beginning—at sunrise—a middle, during which most people are active and functioning, and an end—at night, when we rest. When we are confronted with a problem that touches upon our lives in some way, we pursue a solution and feel satisfied when the situation is resolved. Even if the conclusion is not to our liking, the matter is at an end and we can shift our attention to the next task (failure to do so is called “neurosis” and can serve as fodder for some interesting characterization!)
In modern life, most of us no longer hunt for survival or gather berries and nuts, but we seek adventure and forage for ideas and yearn for connection to something larger than ourselves, driven by the same basic needs as our ancestors. We hunger for justice, thirst for knowledge, and challenge competitors—and ourselves—not resting until a mystery is solved, a reason found, a criminal captured, a race won or lost—but, finally, over. The release of sexual tension through orgasm, the quelling of hunger through eating and thirst through drinking—these basic drives and motivations and rhythms are familiar to us all and are evident in art, music, and story.
Some thoughts about Rules
The English language includes some quirky rules that must be learned and adhered to if one wishes to sound “educated.” In order to be accepted for publication, in most cases, your work must conform to established standards regarding form and, to some extent, style. Fashions come and go in writing as in other forms of expression. Rules remain constant over long stretches of time and, in general, should only be broken when you have a good reason for doing so. Guidelines, on the other hand, describe techniques or approaches that have generally worked well in the past. Certain formulas are commonly used for romance novels, Westerns, mysteries, and Hollywood action films. Following the formula, writers can produce stories that follow a predictable course yet prove popular with the public time and again. Deviation from guidelines may signal doom, or it may result in an original take on a tired theme. Follow guidelines to the extent they are useful to you.
Is the advice, “Show, don’t tell” helpful? Yes, of course. Is there an appropriate time to “tell”? Yes, of course. Is using the passive voice ever desirable? Yes, of course. The discernment necessary to know when to follow and when to deviate is part of the mastery of craft that develops with experience. Just as some people are attuned to the differences in the quality of sound produced by similar musical instruments, or the attributes of a fine wine as compared to a lesser product, the ability to recognize quality writing is partly an innate sensibility and partly the result of experience and training.
Use your judgment and if you have a choice, choose according to your own preference or understanding. If your choice “works,” no one is likely to object. The rules are there to serve you, not hinder you, when your objective is communication. You are free to “do your own thing” and make up your own rules, but you may have a harder time finding an audience that appreciates (and understands!) your work. Allowing your authentic self to emerge through a creative medium is fundamentally different from rebelling against all rules, and the difference in quality will be evident to those with eyes to see. As your confidence grows and your work evolves, you may wish to experiment with new techniques and take more risks.
Experimentation can lead to innovation and examples abound of successful works that break all the rules. Parodies that poke fun at rules or deviate from familiar genre conventions succeed, in part, because of the general acceptance of the rules and expectations that these works defy. When someone does the unexpected or verbalizes the unspoken, delving into territory not discussed in “polite” conversation, the result can be humorous and surprising. Laughter breaks the tension that is created when someone knowingly breaks rules that a more timid soul would never dare to trample upon.
Many rules have exceptions (“i before e except after c”), but they are rules, nonetheless. That and which are not interchangeable; each has a proper use. Writing in complete sentences is, in general, the preferred approach. At times, a sentence fragment can add punch or indicate a halting style. (See Part Two for more on sentence structure, grammar, and punctuation.)
Particular professions and publishing houses have specific guidelines and often their own style manuals; these may vary on matters like whether a serial comma is preferred. Just as American and British spelling of some words (color/colour) is different, conventions like placing a period inside or outside the quotation marks may also vary; when in doubt, check with an authoritative source.
Note, however, that you will also encounter gray areas where authorities disagree. Over time, standards change. New uses of old words become widespread (gay no longer just means bright and happy, plasma now refers to your television as well as your blood, and a mouse is a device used with your computer and not just a critter your cat chases). Hard-and-fast rules become softened by popular misuse until the new use gradually gains acceptance.
An Example
In the second paragraph of the Introduction to this book, I stated, “hopefully, you are writing about something that really interests you.” Some people object to this use of the word “hopefully,” complaining that the word means “with hope,” as in: “The little girl waited hopefully for a chance to sit on Santa’s lap.” And that usage is, of course, correct. But I am not alone in considering both uses of “hopefully” acceptable, partly because so many similar words are used in the same manner without the same objection being raised (“Frankly, my dear . . .”) and partly because substituting the words “I hope” does not always convey the same sentiment.
Compare:
“I hope the weather remains pleasant for my wedding day.”
with:
“Hopefully, you are writing about something that excites you and not jumping through hoops to complete an assignment about a subject that you consider dull.”
The first sentence is an expression of a personal desire but the second expresses a more general sentiment. It’s for your sake that “I hope” but, “honestly,” I don’t care why you are writing; that’s your affair.
Some rules are stupid. Sometimes large numbers of people recognize the stupidity and begin to disregard them. Then the rules change. Did you notice in the discussion above that I started one sentence with “And” and another with “But”? You may have learned in school that you should “never” end a sentence with a preposition—which usually introduces an “object”—or begin a sentence with a conjunction—which usually joins together two parts. In general, following such rules is advisable, especially if formality and propriety are expected, as when you are writing for a professional journal or academic publication. As with other fashion choices, novelty and originality will be more welcome in some arenas than others—know your intended market.
Some writers are versatile enough to write in several genres, categories, or formats, but many find they are best suited to one. Writing for stage or screen requires a different skill set than that needed to write a good novel. If your award-winning story is adapted for the screen, your only role may be as a consultant for the film version. The basics of good, clear, effective writing cut across genres and formats.
My objective here is to review some of the principles that apply to writing in general and to give you, dear writer, some tips and tools for making your manuscript sing, rather than scream for help. I aim to teach you how to examine the building blocks of writing—the ways in which you combine thoughts and words—so you can better evaluate whether your approach succeeds in achieving the desired effect. With the proper tools and foundations, you can erect whatever structures your heart desires.
What this Book is—and is not
I am not an English teacher. I won’t be discussing gerunds or split infinitives or past participles, though I will mention some common grammar and punctuation errors that are easily fixed. I do not work for a publishing house so I cannot give you insider tips about getting published. I am a freelance editor and I work primarily with clients who have already written a solid first draft and have a clear direction for their work.
I have edited, and written, various kinds of fiction and nonfiction materials. I remember well some of the lessons learned, and questions asked, when I started writing fiction, in particular. I have also taught college courses in which students were required to write essays. After reviewing the writing of hundreds of students and professionals, I have noticed some common tendencies—not all of which are technically “errors,” but patterns that distinguish mediocre writing from exceptional writing. I would like to share some of these observations with you.
Screenwriters and script doctors, novelists, agents, and editors all have useful insights to share from their unique perspectives and many worthwhile books about various aspects of writing are readily available. By identifying the ways in which your writing is in need of improvement, you can seek out additional resources for particular topics that are only briefly touched on here. Awareness is an important first step. If you’ve never heard of “exposition,” how would you know to look for a book or article that discusses it?
This book will serve as a useful refresher for experienced writers and will provide an overview of important considerations for new writers. Wherever you are on your writing journey, you will find useful tips that you can apply now.
Through the use of examples, I will show you how to turn vague and poorly written sentences into the messengers of your sparkling wit, the carriers of your poignant reminiscences, and the mouthpieces of your comedic genius that you intended them to be. Or, if your purpose be more mundane, to deliver your thoughts in a clear and concise manner that’s easy for your audience to understand. Whether you are writing a brochure, a dissertation, or the next War and Peace, you will come away with a better understanding of the difference between adequate writing and impeccable writing.
So, get out your red pen—or purple marker or yellow highlighter—and let’s get started.