Tales from the Top

Hi there, thank you so much for Toppy. When I was a child we had a Dachshund called Toppy and later a Maltese called Topsy. Of course I love that Toppy is a Border collie.We adopted Fonty,a Border collie from a local shelter and he lived with us for 17 years.My book's character, Flame has been inspired by him and a bull terrier, Jack which we had many years later. We had sort of a halfway house for many others, but he was the permanent adopted one and really more like human family to us than anything else. I've enjoyed your book, will read some chapters to my grandchild who is now beginning to read for herself, but this one we'll do together. I've enjoyed rating your easy writing style am sure children will love reading it. I also put you on my watch list so that I don't forget your book. Will be in touch some time in May. Kindest regards
Maretha/African Adventures of Flame..and Friends

HI,
I hope the holiday is going well. It sounded fantastic and a long way. Just like Australia there's a heaps of miles to cover before you see everything. I've pulled my book off and having a break.Hope you get further up the ladder when you return. Although remember it's just a game.

Bye,
Michelle

This Story is so helpful! I can now appreciate a little of what my dog Sam went through when he moved in.
This is more like an instruction book, all new dog owners should read it! Very nicely put together.
Karamak Faking it in France.

Your books gone down. What's happening??
Michelle

Your books gone down. What's happening??
Michelle

Your books gone down. What's happening??
Michelle

Your books gone down. What's happening??
Michelle

Your books gone down. What's happening??
Michelle

Extraordinary!

Regards,
Rian Torr
New London Masquerade

By sheer fluke I stumbled upon this book. I have two little dogs and immediately had to read. It is a brilliant concept and written so well.
My litlle pup is going through the scary operation like Toppy did, it's nice to see it from a dogs eyes.
You write so believeably and Toppy's thoughts are portrayed so well that I am now looking at my dogs and wondering - what are they thinking? How do they see the world and more importantly - me!
I love the rescue dog part - many dog owners can relate to that, I laugh at how they choose us.
This is a beautiful book and I think will go far. Every Christmas I inevitably receive a book on dogs, usually on behaviour, training or just pictures. All standard stuff, this is so unique that I wouldn't wait to get it as a christmas book, I would buy it. This book would appeal to all dog lovers and as the world is full of them you are on to a winner.
Congrats on a wonderful read. My shelf is full after a recent rotation, but Toppy will gain a place there on my next rotation for now 6 stars and on watchlist. Thanks for making me laugh and look at at my dogs and indeed all differently!

Jayne x

I love this. Top is so cute and manipulating.
I love the first person perspective, it makes it real.
I have written a story about a cat - I know cats are taboo- from first person and he's a bit full of himself as well(not yet on the site). It's great to see animals personified. keep it up. Your on my shelf.
Michelle

Maria,
Many thanks for your kind comment. Please note that Tales from the Top is pretty much autobiographical and I did not "create" a character. Toppy is Toppy and the stories are true. Please follow the link on Tops biography page to see the youtube video of him getting dad's paper when he was just three months old. Incidentally he is two and a half years old now and as loveable as ever.
Toppy's Dad

My first impression is that you write from a unique viewpoint and you do it very well. Your style of writing is perfect for the genre you are aiming for; the words flow with such ease and simplicity - not to mention the humour too. I smiled at the end of chapter 1 as Toppy reflects on who picked who - and I was happy to continue reading about the loveable character you have created in Toppy.
Maria (Georgina's Family)

My first impression is that you write from a unique viewpoint and you do it very well. Your style of writing is perfect for the genre you are aiming for; the words flow with such ease and simplicity - not to mention the humour too. I smiled at the end of chapter 1 as Toppy reflects on who picked who - and I was happy to continue reading about the loveable character you have created in Toppy.
Maria (Georgina's Family)

As a dog, I could've (wishful thinking) written this brilliant book. Top's voice is amazing and oh what tales we could tell if dogs really talked.
Very enjoyable.
Many stars and on my shelf.
Wintergreen :)

Hi Top!

Thanks so much for backing by book, The Keeper of the Sightless Eye.

I loved your book. It is very entertaining and heart-warming and filled me with joy. Simply written, but written very well and effectively none-the-less.

Honestly, if I was an editor looking for a potential best seller, I would be unsure about what audience this book would appeal to. It doesn't really fit into any large-grossing adult genre, and would need a bit of fictional magic or unreality to really appeal to a children's market (of course my knowledge of literature for children is very limited, so this is speculation).

If you're hoping to write something really saleable, I might suggest that you consider using what you've written to craft some sort of guide for dog-owning families. This way you'll have a proven market, and presenting an informative guide in the heart-warming style of your submission would set it out from the crowd of other guides available to pet owners and animal lovers.

Contratulations on a great submission,
David Southam
Author of The Keeper of the Sightless Eye

A great idea for a book. Love the way it is told through the dogs eyes. A story told well and very appealing. Also like the way you describe the dogs actions -obviously told by someone who knows dogs!

This was really cute and I'm sure would appeal to little kids who are getting into chapter books. Your world from a dogs view. It's really, really cute.

-Aliah
Her Demise

This must appeal to children with its clear narrative, endearing subject and most of all its originality. It is surely a book to read and be read to and I wish it well. Starred and for my shelf very shortly. Margaret.

This is a cute book! Very unique idea writing from the dog's point of view. One distraction for me was that the fonts often changed even within a chapter. Having the entire story in the same font would give it a more professional look. But very enjoyable overall. All the best to you!

Patti

Hello Toppy, I have two lovely dogs and two young children so your stories would have great appeal in my household. My children love Marley & Me so I think these stories would have equal interest.

My dogs are called Mac (a black lab/staffy cross) and Molly (an Irish red setter). They were both rescues and we've had Mac since he was 4 months old so have been through a lot of Toppy's experiences, including that special operation and that nasty cone (which lasted all of 4 days as Mac kept bashing it into things until it disintegrated - clever dog) so I could really relate to these tales. I can imagine many dog loving parents having as much fun with these stories as their children.

A lovely read.

Oook!

Translation: This is a great kiddies book, and I rate it highly!

Tales from the Top.
By Toppy

I would think that your book would be most suited to the 8-11 age group...It’s just great!!
This is a book that would be welcome in any home that has young children.
It would be an excellent contribution to a child's book shelf in a bedroom...it's so likeable and down-to-earth.
My 9 yrs old Granddaughter, Abby, took a read of it, she laughed a lot as it was from the dogs P.O.V.
She now looks differently at her own dog at home...it's made her wonder what dogs do think about.
It's a great book you have here and I really do wish you well with it...Brilliant!
Pleased to star rate it high and to shelve it.
Best wishes.
Kind regards,


Neville. The Secrets of the Forest – The Time Zone.

Woof, mmmmrrrr fun mmmrrrr book mmmmrrr to read mmmmrrrr! Rrrrwwww TOP mmmmrrrrrr marks, wwwwwoof!

I really enjoyed reading this. The concept and execution are remarkably done and make for a most pleasant read.
There were two tiny things I noticed.
Chapter ten is missing the word 'too' in the sentence "I'm tempted tell the other dogs..."
Chapter 13 has a broken paragraph. A minor change like making the font the same will add a feeling that you truly care about your story and want it to be the best it can be.
Thanks for suggesting it and I hope you might give my book a glance.
Roy Belletete
--In Search of a Memory--

I enjoyed this, David. My brother writes children’s adventure novels for Macmillan and I’m always impressed by how children’s authors balance making the text sufficiently simple to be understood by their young readers without allowing it to become bland or one dimensional. You also seem to have pulled off this delicate balancing act very nicely. Terrific stuff.

The prose is very smooth and Toppy’s ‘voice’ comes across as both real and consistent. The text does feel a bit short on commas at times, and the punctuation re dialogue needs looking at, but that’s an easy fix. I like Tops’s mischievousness - and I’m sure this will appeal to kids too – but I do question whether, in your opening chapters, it’s a good idea to make Top both anti-children and quite so self-obsessed and manipulative. He doesn’t come across as a particularly sympathetic character and his ‘no-kids’ policy risks alienating your target readers. Just a thought.

In short, an original, often very funny read. High stars for the book and a big juicy marrow bone for Top!! Thanks and best of luck. A


I made some notes on the opening chapters as I went along. Please feel free to ignore!!

Chapter 1:

‘My name is Top [comma]…’

Repetition of ‘since’.

‘Each of the prospects…’ – not a complete sentence. Maybe incorporate into preceding sentence with a comma?

Again, you need a comma to separate the subordinate clause from the main body of the sentence (ie ‘As the smartest… of the litter [comma] I pretty much…’)

If this is a book for children, I’m not sure it’s a good idea to have Top turning his nose up at families with kids?? Or, in fact, have him nipping at children?? Risks alienating your target readers??

‘…lost cause [full-stop or semi-colon not comma] the/The family…’

Repetition of seem, seemed, seemed.

In terms of realism, I like the idea of Top being rather big headed and manipulative but it doesn’t make him a very sympathetic character for children to identify with??

The text is a bit short on commas (eg ‘Then, when it was least expected, fortune…’) An easy fix, tho.

‘Why not?’ I thought [full-stop not comma] ‘Can’t…’

‘it’s ok with me…’


Chapter 2:

Again, in terms of appealing to children, I’m not sure it’s a good idea to portray Top as scheming/manipulative etc??

‘I heard Dad tell Mom…’

I like the idea of Toppy not completely getting his way re jumping on things. Feels more realistic and his acceptance of this minor setback makes him feel more sympathetic.

This is so cute! I was laughing the entire time I read it. Toppy can certainly be lovable and stubborn at the same time. Hmm, actually that reminds me a lot of my own dog.
I really liked this story, but it needs some work. Sometimes you use the same words twice in a paragraph, I would suggest replacing one of them with another word that means the same thing. Also, you have some run on sentences and forget to place commas where needed.
I rate Tales From the Top four stars.
-Charmain

Dear Toppy

Yours is a smart story and i am sure you are a smart dog. All dog lovers will know and understand what you are talking about. It is great that you feel so at home with your adoptive parents. An interesting idea, developed well and faultlessly executed.

All the best

Fran Macilvey, "Trapped"

I have to say, I read your pitch and was immediately turned off... (a novel from the POV of an animal...really?!) then started reading it, and I think it's great! Very different than I imagined it being, and well written. I ended up reading the whole thing, and it was a great, feel-good read. Six stars for you!

I never thought I would enjoy a doggy book! Not at all my genre. But this gets off to such a good start and I like the writing style- have put on WL to come back to. If you would like to look at mine perhaps...

Oh my goodness I am laughing so much and am only at Chapter 2, but I have to go to bed... Your charming book is on my w/l and I look forward to reading more. I wonder if you'd like to take a look at Sit, Stay, Leave! a story of a woman whose teenagers persuade her to home an outsize puppy pushing her chaotic life over the edge. Finally, forced to train her large dog, she recognises that these skills can help her get the upper hand over her rowdy teenagers, manipulative ex-husband and bullying boss. Toppy is absolutely gorgeous and so clever to collect the newspaper, Coloratura

Dear Toppy,

For so many reasons, you reminded me of my childhood and junior school. Autobiographies, you know. Since I never had a friend like you, I always had to imagine the whole thing. And what rubbish I wrote. Had I known you at that time, I would have secured top marks. Anyway, I guess I always wanted to have someone like you. But, mom and dad were too busy and unwilling to have to look out for another pesky little thing when they already had their hands full with me.
And believe me, I was quite a handful.

But once on vacation, I had gone to stay with a relative. Over there, I met a big and sturdy fellow called Leo. He had golden brown mane with a touch of black and was almost a couple of heads taller than me when he stood up on his haunches. Even his head was bigger than mine. I learnt that he came from a very prestigious family of German Shepherds. He had such a deep voice too. Although, he never shouted at me, I was terrified of him in the beginning. I was just 7, you know. He would stalk up on me and just stare at me menacingly.

And then one day, while having breakfast, I found him trying to chew off my right foot! Imagine my shock. Although I felt no pain, I screamed my lungs out. But before I realised what was happening, he plucked the slipper right off my foot and ran off to a short distance. As I looked on, he turned around and waited for me to catch up, with my flip-flop dangling from his mouth. That was the beginning. Over the next two months, we became the best of friends.

Many years have passed, but I still miss him. I never had a better friend. Anyway, it was very nice knowing you, gotta go now. You write beautiful English by the way. And you’re funny too. I’ll come back to hear more from you. Meanwhile, I’ll leave you with these 6 shiny stars. Don’t go chasing too many cars, okay? And be careful when you fetch the paper next time.
Traffic’s pretty bad these days. Take care.

Your new friend,
AGC

Alright, so I read to chapter 3, laid around and then had to come back because there is a lot I want to say. It isn't very clear in the beginning where the dog came from before the pet store. That leads me to wonder about the recent scandals regarding puppy mills.

I remember when we got our Australian Shepherd from a farm. He cried the whole way home and for sometime into the night. It was quite a traumatizing experience for him. But I guess if he had been cooped up in a store for some time he may have been eager for a human to take him home.

I would have liked to see the puppy interacting with his peers in the store. The vast majority of the story is narrative, telling us things instead of acting them out. When I was reading I tried to picture myself from the puppy's perspective, staring up at the tall table where his owners were eating. The massive wooden chew toys holding a wooden ceiling in place. They ate above the ceiling. I began chewing on the one such toy, my mommy sitting up above.
For some reason they chose to eat their food up there. They left a bowl full of funny brown cereal for me to eat, but countless odors wafted in from above. Strange scents held me in a trance, making me unable to pull way.

"Toppy! Stop that!" she shouted in alarm. Playfully, I grabbed at her foot, chewing on the white cloth covering her toes. "Ouch!" she screeched, her leg flying up into the table. Another screech shot out as a massive white saucer flew through the air, shattering on the ground beside me.
Food! With great fervor I pounced. Strips of long, thin meat were inhaled.

Sorry, I started thinking a story. But anywho, I would expect the puppy to be curious about everything, not knowing what this new world was about. Getting into things, he would learn (often the hard way) that not everything is meant to be played with. This is just my initial thoughts. I hope they were helpful. I will continue reading sometime during the week.

I really love this pretty puppy~

Cute Toppy~~~

have added you to WL and rated, will back as soon as possible, thank you for backing ''It's a Dog's Life'' much appreciated.

The opening is so sad I had my pet lip out reading it. Your write very well and I have fully rated you.

Good luck with this.

Best wishes,

Laura
Beneath The Blossom Tree

Hello Toppy!

Great premise, and an artful exxecution up to the 4th chapter... You seemed to be losing your touch there a bit. It was a funny read till then, however, one deserving the six stars and the beloved backing :)

Yannis
The Book of the Forsaken

Cute, funny, good, and backed.

LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS BOOK! CAN'T SAY IT ENOUGH!

hello Toppy- are up really a dog ??

Book Tales from the top-

after reading many chapters. you have me feeling that i'm the dog you are writing about .
that is the effect that this delectable and delightful book had on me .

This is a most original read and will no doubt, when published, be adored by children and older children. like me.and of course the billions of dog lovers.
so many chapters that i enjoyed - training parents- oouch it hurts-give a little to get- my friend charlie-

Found it difficult to turn off the screen, it's that sort of a story, so innocent yet sounding so real.

it gets my six stars with pleasure and i wish you Toppy good luck with it --bow wow-

tom bye
from hugs to kisses'
oblige and read some of mine and rate if you like it , thanks

I read your first chapter.

General comments: A delightful start. A fascinating main character. By the end of the first chapter, I was really interested in how things would turn out for Top. Clever wit. Could use a bit more description. Good tension. Effective pacing.

Specific comments on the first chapter:
1) ' ... I pretty much had my choice of the humans that came in to look at us.' 'That' should be 'who.'
2) ' ... since I would have to compete for my parent's affection.' Parent's (singular possessive) should be parents' (plural possessive).
3) ... and said to the man: "Oh look how cute this one is.' Replace the colon with a comma.
4) "Let's ask and see which is easier to train, males or females." 'Is' should be 'are.'
5) 'I waited anxiously' is telling. How does Top's anxiety manifest? Consider showing this.
6) "If this is the one you want its ok with me." Its (possessive pronoun) should be it's (contraction for it is).

I hope these comments help you further polish your all important first chapter. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Thank you again for your early and long support of "Savannah Oak."

Have a sensational day.

Al

T,
As a dog-owner, I find myself easily falling into conversation with complete strangers walking their dog at the same park I use. acknowledging our being part of the same doggy world, a kind of parallel dimension we slip in and out of at will. "Tales from the Top" is yet another must-read for dog-lovers the world over. Being in Toppy's POV, following his shenanigans from adoption to locating dog heaven on a California beach, I recalled my initiation into dog lit through Farley Mowat's "The Dog Who Wouldn't Be" as a featured story in the Reader's Digest long, long ago. Ligthhearted books like these, while casual and kid-friendly, somehow stay in my system and invite re-reads time and time again. Thanks for sharing. Backed and starred.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Hi Toppy-Read the first three chapters and your book certainly has its own charm. Is this meant to be a children's 'how to' book? Will it be illustrated? I can see this selling at Petsmart as a way to engage children in taking care of their dog. Like the dog's perspective. It's a fun way to learn about dog care. On a much grander scale, I can almost see this as a TV show on the Animal Planet-like a "Look Who's Talking" with Toppy instead of a baby. Clever and enjoyable to read. HIghly recommended and highly starred.
Dina of Halo of the Damned and The Last Degree

What a cute book. I love that it tell's the story through the eyes of Toppy. It is well written and fun to read. I read through the first couple of Chapters. I'll be back to read more.

Hope you can take a look at Menopause. A dark comedy about a menopausal serial killer who kills all the “bad” people she has known throughout her life in order to make the world a better place. At the age of fifty, she transforms herself into a warrior and avenger righting all the wrongs experienced in a lifetime.

Thanks, Helen

Tales from the Top. As an animal lover who no longer has animals, I am attracted by your pitches, but not so much by the cover.
I take notes as I read, but dont pretend to be an expert.

Ch.1. A clever psychology lesson, and a very smart little doggy. I'm glad Top didnt try any devious methods to deter the older couple from chosing his sister.
Be careful with your choice of words (?attractive). I almost began to think he was a she by the end of this chapter.
Here are one or two little nits...
You have two 'since's in that first paragraph.
And dont you mean each of the prospects hoped...?
There are several 'seem's further down, fairly close together.

Ch.2. Perhaps you dont need that first sentence?
More excellent psychology 'letting him sleep next to me'. You really have to read it with the correct inflexions for the message to come across. Actually, that one is also used by invading countries, isnt it!

Ch.3. Poor Toppy! And how often are we all hoodwinked by others.

Ch.4. Havent you got this a bit wrong.. shouldnt he 'give' with a genuine desire to show thanks to his parents, and then be pleasantly surprised when he receives treasures in return?
But perhaps that will come further on in the book, when Top grows out of his self-centredness.

Ch.5. Countless times have I seen cheeky little puppies offsetting agression with friendly cheerfulness. You capture the moment well.

Ch.6. An unexpected hook. Is this going to turn into a travelogue as well -

I could go on and on and on. But I've read enough to realise this deserves supporting It would take minimal editingto reach publication standard.
Jane (Breath of Africa)

Cute and adorable. This isn't what I would normally read since I'm a horror writer, but I think this could do quite well if presented to the right market.

I recently had to put my dog down and I am now finding myself drawn to books written by dogs - it's as though they are talking to me and somehow I feel better. I especially love chapter two with training your parents (owners, lord of the manor) so adorable. This book is exceptionional - the stories are the perfect remedy for anyone who has been in love with a pet! Well written and polished!

Liz
The Cheech Room

Argh, I ws frustrated I couldn't get the youtube link in 4 to work. Can you post it on your profile or paste it in a message to me.

Thanks
I miss my doggy :(

Bill
HH

More people should read work written by a dog. It will change their perspective on life. Well done, most enjoyable. I think Pet Smart et. al. should set aside shelf space for the work. Backed. Chuck

I love that last line. It made me smile. Toppy is sure full of herself. Thinking she is the most attractive and the best choice and that she actually picks her owner. What a funny little dog she is. But I can see how she has the power to manipulate the potential owner. That dog lick and puppy sad face and little barks. I think she should have barked as if she was talking to them.

short. fun. living in a life of a dog. it has all the great things that make a catchy first chapter. I liked when they put her sister instead and how she was so confused because SHE was the most attractive not her.

But this was just pure entertainment. I don't know what to say. It's probably one of the very first chapters I read in a long time that had a SHORT chapter and was just fun. 6 stars.