A Genie in the House of Saud: Zubis Rises

KF Zuzulo

Bound to Zubis by an ancient betrayal, journalist Bethany O'Brien must overcome the djinni's will and stop the rise of a marauding empire.

Zubis is among the last of the race of djinn who dwell on earth. One wish remains before he is released from bondage to the House of Saud. His desire for vengeance against humans has percolated for 3,000 years. Bethany O'Brien, a journalist in Washington, DC, is bound to Zubis by an ancient betrayal. She must salvage her existence as the Asima Uruk to destroy him. Yet, those same memories will reveal a conspiracy that implicates Bethany and challenges everything she believes. The key to her redemption is recorded within the rituals of three major religions and the relationship she once shared with Zubis. The Middle East becomes the center of a struggle for the third wish that will strip truth from desire and establish a marauding empire.

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djinni, genie, intrigue, italy, london, middle east, paranormal, strong female characters, supernatural, suspense, thriller, washington dc, world gove...

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4 comments

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Barry Wenlock wrote 612 days ago

A good read. Thanks, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

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Huseyin Angay wrote 664 days ago

I really wanted to enjoy this. Promising plot, for a start. Besides, I grew up with tales like this. An adaptation to the modern day should work really well.
Unfortunately, the language flows like treacle. It has the feel of having been translated. It's a style that works in Arabic, Farsi or even Turkish. In English, it just feels somehow awkward -- archaic almost.
For instance: 'The image before him, gray and muscular, shimmered in opalescence like the underside of an oyster shell.'
Beautiful! And if there were only one or two of these, it would be fine. But more like it come thick and fast until the reader is overwhelmed by the imagery while the story languishes in the sidelines.

There is a good story in there and you can write well. If you could just tone the mataphors and the similes down a bit?

Best wishes.
Huseyin
'All Things Noble'

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cmanteria wrote 1098 days ago

KF,

Hi. Great stuff. Love the characters. Love the descriptions. One of the better written pieces I have seen on here.

The cover feels like it is perfect for this piece as well.

Shelved.

If you haven't done so please take a look at my MS

Best wishes,
Chris
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=4441

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bluestocking wrote 1107 days ago

WOW I really dig this. Splendid stuff. Just finished Ch. 4. It's very exciting!!!

Your prose is very clean, elegant--even the copy is really clean, a pleasure to read. I found only one typo (photographer's "loupe" not "loop.")

I also enjoyed the realistic setting of the magazine production office. One of my best friends works at a firm producing this type of material for automobile companies et al., so I know something about how that works. Your mastery of detail here is just great, so accurate; this gives tremendous ease, momentum and assurance to the prose, and all the while you're building this supernatural situation--really, it's great.

The exchange between the king and the djinn, too, is wonderful; there are familiar things, a lamp, a wish and a genie, and the link between these and our own world is made deftly and naturally. The setting here is one you obviously know well and are at ease in--and one in the news of course--so I think it will find a ready audience just on that basis alone, of curiosity about all things Middle Eastern ...

Possible improvements: I would lose the prologue. I'm just not a fan of prologues generally, so take this with a grain of salt--but most especially not when the subject matter of prologue and first chapter are so very very far apart, with no obvious or teasing link. I think it slows you down too much when you hit the first chapter, as matters stand. My other issue is that the mysterious messages reaching Bethany from this other world are via modern technology--phone calls and cellphone photos--kind of diminishes the other-worldliness a bit.

Okay that is it from me. I will look forward to reading the rest. I'm happy to put this one on my guest shelf. Best of luck with your wonderful book--Maria.

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