Book Jacket

 

rank 5456
word count 21036
date submitted 23.01.2009
date updated 10.02.2009
genres: Fiction, Thriller
classification: moderate
incomplete

A Genie in the House of Saud: Zubis Rises

KF Zuzulo

Bound to Zubis by an ancient betrayal, journalist Bethany O'Brien must overcome the djinni's will and stop the rise of a marauding empire.

 

Zubis is among the last of the race of djinn who dwell on earth. One wish remains before he is released from bondage to the House of Saud. His desire for vengeance against humans has percolated for 3,000 years. Bethany O'Brien, a journalist in Washington, DC, is bound to Zubis by an ancient betrayal. She must salvage her existence as the Asima Uruk to destroy him. Yet, those same memories will reveal a conspiracy that implicates Bethany and challenges everything she believes. The key to her redemption is recorded within the rituals of three major religions and the relationship she once shared with Zubis. The Middle East becomes the center of a struggle for the third wish that will strip truth from desire and establish a marauding empire.

 
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tags

djinni, genie, intrigue, italy, london, middle east, paranormal, strong female characters, supernatural, suspense, thriller, washington dc, world gove...

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An Ancient Oath

 

 

Koran 7:12-18

 

God said, “What prevented you from bowing

when I commanded you?”

Iblis said, “I am better than he: You created me of fire,

but You created him of clay…

And I intend to come upon them, to their faces

and behind their backs

and from their right and their left:

and You will not find most of them grateful to you.”

God said, “Get out of here, despised and rejected:

Indeed, if any of them follow you, I will fill hell with you all.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

    Ali Qadir bin Saud lurched to his feet, his eyes fixed on the upended copper object.  Mist rose from it in a languid spiral that flavored the air with the odor of sandalwood and skin.  The long exhalation that pressed through the spout was not as he imagined it would be.  The sound was hushed, and held doubt and secrets.  Ali Qadir’s glance flashed to the closed tent flap.  Captain Rais stood sentry just outside and could be summoned with one yell.  But Qadir waited.  The mist rose further and set into the blur of a hulking figure, greater than the height of two camels, one atop the other.

    “Allah, protect me,” Ali Qadir called out.  He stepped back and raised his hands in resistance, not ready to concede fear. 

    The image before him, gray and muscular, shimmered in opalescence like the underside of an oyster shell.  Arms raised above its angular head in a stretch.  The wide gash of a mouth traveled through a drama of emotions.  A glint of teeth intimated pleasure tinged with malevolence.  A final solemn expression beneath restless eyes was like the impatience of a lover once betrayed.

    Bluish skin blushed yellow against the air.  Black orbs showed no iris, no white globes, until a slow, purposeful blinking constricted the black to a center pupil and infused the eyes with the golden color of dunes after sunset.  Dark coils of hair formed a tight wreath against its head, so black that it reminded Ali Qadir of the utter void of a starless sky.  And like the silvery etchings of distant constellations, strange symbols and lines carved illuminated scars into the being’s forehead.  At first, the marks appeared raised and angry, but gradually faded to an opaque tattoo that revealed itself in bits as the hair swirled and fell across its brow. 

    The apparition’s countenance twisted between a smile and a sneer.  “Your God is my God.”

    “No,” Ali Qadir said.  “You are one of the djinn.  You are a follower of Iblis, the fallen one.”    

    A low rumble coursed through the genie’s chest and spilled from his mouth in a grunt of laughter.  “Ali Qadir bin Saud,” he said.  “Have you not heard?  It is you who fell.  It is man who betrayed his God.”

    The smoky-topaz colored eyes were knowing.  The face was unbearded and set in sharp angles, as though carved from granite.  A long crease cut below each eye and ran down to the lower jaw.  On the left cheek, the scar formed the number seven; on the right, its image was mirrored and reversed.

    Palms raised upward in mock supplication, the creature spoke.  “I am a simple being, bound to the deceits of men.”  His image quivered and became denser.  “And now I am bound to you, Ali Qadir.”  He swept one heavily muscled arm before him and lowered himself to one knee in a bow.  Metallic rattling from a set of wide gold cuffs on each wrist echoed through the tent.

    “Rais,” Ali Qadir called.

    The captain swept through the flap and immediately froze, his eyes wide beneath a heavy brow.

    “Rais,” Ali Qadir repeated.  He gestured to a dark corner.  “My sword.”

    Rais walked in a broad circle around the kneeling figure but did not take his eyes from him.  With the sword in hand, he moved next to Ali Qadir and handed him the weapon.

    Ali Qadir paced slowly around the djinni.  “Tell me your name, spirit,” Ali Qadir said.  “I will not be bound to the unholy one.”

    Shadows shifted with the movement of the djinni when he stood.  He held his hands behind his back and looked down upon Ali Qadir.  “I am Zubis, forgotten servant of King Solomon.”  A dervish of sand blew through the open flap, as though the desert remembered its captive.

    Ali Qadir bent and retrieved the copper lamp that had been regurgitated by the desert in the previous night’s sandstorm.  Its caramel-colored surface showed the pitted history of millenia submerged in an ocean of sand.  Its parched tomb had not allowed the copper to oxidize to green.  There was no top opening for the deposit of oil.  A thin spout jutted from the side  a chimney for smoke from which the djinni had issued.  Unfamiliar glyphs marked the entire lamp.

    “Can I destroy you, Zubis?”

    Zubis grunted.  “Not you.  But have no fear.  Your devotion is not mine to corrupt, O future king.  Your desires are many and I can fulfill but three of them.”

    Ali Qadir inhaled deeply.  “Allah, guide me.”  He directed his voice to Zubis and said, “There are only two things I want.”

    “So be it,” said Zubis.  “But I am bound to you until the third wish is fulfilled.”

 

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Barry Wenlock wrote 719 days ago

A good read. Thanks, Barry
Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

Huseyin Angay wrote 770 days ago

I really wanted to enjoy this. Promising plot, for a start. Besides, I grew up with tales like this. An adaptation to the modern day should work really well.
Unfortunately, the language flows like treacle. It has the feel of having been translated. It's a style that works in Arabic, Farsi or even Turkish. In English, it just feels somehow awkward -- archaic almost.
For instance: 'The image before him, gray and muscular, shimmered in opalescence like the underside of an oyster shell.'
Beautiful! And if there were only one or two of these, it would be fine. But more like it come thick and fast until the reader is overwhelmed by the imagery while the story languishes in the sidelines.

There is a good story in there and you can write well. If you could just tone the mataphors and the similes down a bit?

Best wishes.
Huseyin
'All Things Noble'

cmanteria wrote 1204 days ago

KF,

Hi. Great stuff. Love the characters. Love the descriptions. One of the better written pieces I have seen on here.

The cover feels like it is perfect for this piece as well.

Shelved.

If you haven't done so please take a look at my MS

Best wishes,
Chris
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=4441

bluestocking wrote 1213 days ago

WOW I really dig this. Splendid stuff. Just finished Ch. 4. It's very exciting!!!

Your prose is very clean, elegant--even the copy is really clean, a pleasure to read. I found only one typo (photographer's "loupe" not "loop.")

I also enjoyed the realistic setting of the magazine production office. One of my best friends works at a firm producing this type of material for automobile companies et al., so I know something about how that works. Your mastery of detail here is just great, so accurate; this gives tremendous ease, momentum and assurance to the prose, and all the while you're building this supernatural situation--really, it's great.

The exchange between the king and the djinn, too, is wonderful; there are familiar things, a lamp, a wish and a genie, and the link between these and our own world is made deftly and naturally. The setting here is one you obviously know well and are at ease in--and one in the news of course--so I think it will find a ready audience just on that basis alone, of curiosity about all things Middle Eastern ...

Possible improvements: I would lose the prologue. I'm just not a fan of prologues generally, so take this with a grain of salt--but most especially not when the subject matter of prologue and first chapter are so very very far apart, with no obvious or teasing link. I think it slows you down too much when you hit the first chapter, as matters stand. My other issue is that the mysterious messages reaching Bethany from this other world are via modern technology--phone calls and cellphone photos--kind of diminishes the other-worldliness a bit.

Okay that is it from me. I will look forward to reading the rest. I'm happy to put this one on my guest shelf. Best of luck with your wonderful book--Maria.

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