Wife Seeking Wife

Wow!! You hooked me in from the blurb and your first chapter was far from disappointing!!! You have a fantastic storline here & a great main character to hold it together. Such a serious subject yet with that little injection of humour. This will do well. I wish you the very best of luck & will be reading on. kind regards pinkcoffee 'In The Moment' & 'Chameleon'

Jennifer!!! Okay, so this is just wonderful. In the first chapter I: laughed, my eyes got watery, and then I laughed again! And then my eyes got watery again. And then I got hopeful. And then I got really excited about finding out what was going to happen next. Places to fix? If there were any, sugar, I didn't see them. So good. I would BUY this book. I would buy it in a second and I may not be able to let any of my friends borrow it, but would instead FORCE them to get their own. This is really good. I loved the bit about cursing and the chocolate cherries. I loved the letter from Grace and the bit about Madilynn's husband. I almost CRIED!!! at the part about Tristen. Oh lord. They say there is a name for a person who loses a spouse. A name for a person who loses a parent. But there is no word for a person who has lost a child.

I am speechless.

Rachel May

Hi! I like your writing even though I have seen at least two films with this type of story line i.e. Terminally ill mother seeks mother. Your book seems to be another take on this theme. However, I liked it from the start - great first few lines - and wanted to read on to the end. Personally I thought that there was too much dialogue and I was a bit dizzy by the end trying to follow it but perhaps that's reading on screen for you. Keep writing. You've got talent!

Dear Jennifer,


Just back to take a peek because when I book-shelved Wife Seeking Wife, I couldn’t open the manuscript.

Your pitch stopped me in my tracks. And the first few lines of your synopsis opened my eyes. Let me read some more. This is a beautiful concept. Wholly original.

An extraordinary style of writing. The way you handle the grief is true to life. Beautifully written. I see Wife Seeking Wife is being recommended in Forum. I’ll seek it out and bounce it.

You are writing about something I know about. It’s too close for comfort.

You handle it beautifully though and I wonder whether this is closer to the truth than your readers realize.

Keep well and go well with your writing.


Pierre.

Hi Jennifer,

I read your first three chapters.

You've written a touching, thought-provoking story of death and dying and surviving.

Your characterizations of Grace and Madilynn are full of emotion and character and courage. You use your narrative voice masterfully to reveal so much about each.

Your descriptions are vivid, without being intrusive. For example, 'molasses-colored hair, untouched by electronic hair-styling products, falling in soft waves around her face' or 'A sliver of Tabasco-red sun puddled on the horizon.'

Your conversations seem so real (and honest) I'm almost embarassed to be listening in on them.

Your pacing hooked me from the start and maintained my interest throughout.

Some suggested edits.

"Chaa-aa-arge..." When using three ellipsis dots, separate them from the text with a space. Same thing with 'the guy...had just kissed her.' There are more cases of this type of problem in your first three chapters.

. . . as if saying it aloud would slice too deep and knick her heart. 'Knick' should be 'nick.'

Consider reducing the number of exclamation marks by half. Overuse diminishes their effectiveness.

Vaughn, bored with the recycled plot already, shifted his attention to his bride of 24 years. Spell out numbers 1 to 99.

"What?!" she yelped. One punctuation mark after 'what' is sufficient.

There are minor lapses and didn't interfer with my enjoyment of your touching story.

Good luck with this book which I have backed.

Al

PS: Might I ask you to read and review SAVANNAH PASSION?

Jennifer I'm here for our swap!!!

I chose to read wife seeking wife because I liked the title! I'm afraid I might get weepy -- cancer stories hit home for me. I think this is one of the best openings on authonomy -- loved it! You dont know what I was thinking. You can make reading a computer screen interesting, good job! Liking the MC too...oh and the letter is so sad, told you I'd be getting bleary eyed. Nice way to filter in the story though. I assumed this was going to be told from the perspective of the dying woman - and I like that it's not. Ok, haven't read far enough to see if you use her POV too, but that could work,just liked the first chapter so much. THIS IS GREAT --- OMG did I just use all caps? Never done that before. I love this story though, can I buy it, huh? Can I? Can I? Ohhh, I cant wait to read more...but must continue stomping now...making room for this on my shelf now....

YAY

one only suggestion I have is to look at your sentences. You do start alot with She or Madilynn - especially at the start of paragraphs. Mix it up a bit, decide on another subject of the sentence and then rewrite accordingly. but your story is powerful girl!

ps, why do your books have different author names? are you two people or just multpile personalities?

This is quite a story. Bittersweet. Very well done.

The writing here seems effortless and easy (and I am sure it is neither), so much so that I read 5 chapters straight off (which is two more than I udually read before the screen begins to flicker). First of all, the premise of the book is appealing to me. The woman who has lost everything and the woman who is about to, becoming friends without actually meeting (so far) and helping each other to try to cope with the world as it is. The counterpoint provided by mad Carly is great too. But the descriptions, the dialogues and the characterisation are faultless. (I found only one thing which somehow jarred for me ad that was the use of the verb 'yelp' in chapter 2. A strange choice of word at the best of times, but shoved away in here amonst the otherwise almost perfect prose, it just sort of jumped out at me. Obviously, this is a very personal quibble and of little import. You have some deft little touches we speak volumes too. The condolence e-mails left on the computer, Madilynn finally going to the master bedroom, the slow movement out of the grey inertia of the beginning to some kind of light through contact with Grace. It is all very subtlely done and very beautiful in its way. Obviously, I am going to back this and put it on my shelf. I fell embarrassed to ask but would be very grateful if you would glance at Common Places for me. I am desperately trying to hold on till the end of the week at #3 or I wouldn't dream of making such a suggestion.

Hi Jennifer,

Big problems here on this island. Mostly can't access Authonomy. When I can like now, it's so slow I can't use it. Have read your pitch and synopsis and remember how well your other work was. Wife Seeking Wife on my bookshelf. Don't know when I'll be able to critique because I can't open manuscripts. Trying to fix the problem.

Kind regards,


Pierre.

Jennifer,
What an incredible thought provoking story line. Wonderful writing. On my shelf.
Charity

Hi Jennifer. I can't read your story fast enough. I even got teary eyed in the first chapter. How totally bizarre yet somehow captivating. Shelved and good luck. Janet Marie

Hi Jennifer,
I just KNEW that WSW would be amazing. KNEW it. Your writing is strong, strong, strong - not an extra word anywhere! I don't even know how to critique your work, you're a very accomplished writer, and I know you'll go far. In particular, I liked Grace's diary entries interlaced with her daily life, and your switch from first person to third person is effortless. My only thought is that perhaps I would have liked to know by the end of chapter 1 why Madillyn had given up those chocolate-covered cherries. I'm sure we'll find out later (I've read two chapters so far), but somehow, I would have liked to know her reason before I got immersed into Grace's world. But this is minor. I love this story, and on my shelf you go! Rise fast, and get noticed!

Hello Jennifer,

Just shelved Wife seeking Wife from my WL. Good luck with it. It's full of compassion and courage.

Joanna

read all you have uploaded and want more! My only crit so far, and i am not sure it is even a crit - i felt a little disconcerted when you took me backwards to Vaughn's childhood - so engrossed with the present story, i didn't want to leave it - having said that, it did suck me in, but thought it worth mentioning. Some the scenes are just so poignant, particularly between Carly and Madilynn, i can see this book (if i read it all) would have me balling my eyes out. Really great writing.

Hello Jennifer,

This is very now. Very show don't tell. The theme is powerful and could be a bit too Mills and Boon, but the stark way you handle it, makes it gritty. I've put it on my watch list and hope it does well.

Joanna

Jennifer, I was just flipping through the newest books uploaded, and yours caught my attention. When I opened it up and saw that you are "fourears" I remembered you from when you commented on Carry Me Away, so I thought I'd take a look. I was immediately drawn in. I've only read the first chapter, but the writing is solid, very solid. The characters come to life quickly, the dialog feels real, and the story set up in the first chapter is complete and pulls the reader right into the situation. I also have to say that the first word grabbed me: "Crappachino." Cracked me up because of an inside joke. When my daughter was in grade school and we lived in a small town in east Texas (much like Cranberry Falls), and her and a friend had a joke about that, because one of them at a coffee shop started to order a frappacino and got her tongue tangled and said 'crappachino.' One of those words that has stuck with us for years and we still use. Anyway, that really went off on a tangent.

I found your book really appealed to me, maybe in some ways it touches on similar themes to Carry. I also was going to recommend Impossibly Yellow to you, a very similar theme, but a very different treatment. I mentioned your book to ju-ju and I see she's already been here. Good, I knew she'd enjoy yours, and I'm sure you'd like hers as well, one of my favorite books on authonomy.

One quick niggle - the song "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" didn't come out until 2004.

But this is on my shelf, and I want to come back to read more.

just finished chapter four and have no crits to make, this has really hooked me - but life beckons and i need to tear myself away - will be back to read the rest you uploaded soon.

I have read the first chapter of this and really enjoyed it. RobbG messaged me to say, this book look similar to mine - and there are most definitely parallels - I too am looking at the end of someones life (last 3 months) and how difficult it is to let go, though my MC is childless, her mission is to find her replacement (though really it is about letting go and accepting death) - reading your summary, our novels go in different directions - but they certainly hang around the same premise (but then this is quite a well worn theme). I really like the modern twist of using the internet in this - brings this idea bang up to date. I can't make any detailed comments as yet, but plan to read some more and then return. On the strength of what i've read, i'm gonna shelf. If you get a chance, i would love it if you checked out Impossibly Yellow - maybe we can storm HC together?