My House on the Fjord

I'm speechless. This is magical. Your prose to start with and then everything else: the setting, the characters, the events and the feeling I came out with after reading it. “Staring into the entrails of my fear” wow, I mean WOW! And there’s a lot more like that, starting with the very first sentence. Shelved and really wish you the best of luck with this.

Surreal and ethereal. "My House on the Fjord" deserves to be on every the shelf of every home... it certainly deserves to be on mine. Rarely does an adult book come along that expounds on the magic of love - not bluebirds or gushy contrivances, but real love and the very real magic that is created by such feelings.

It reminded me of a grown-up version of David Almond's "Skellig"; a mix of reality laced with wonderland where one begins to question whether what one is reading is real or imagined. All I do know is that what Martin has imagined is sublime. Up there with the best... Another writer who, like Martin had a wonderful imagination but a pared back, relaxed style of writing is Tove Jannson of the Moomins fame. As there, so here.

And it is this question, not only of reality but of ourselves is what we take away from this novel. We ask ourselves how much we allow ourselves to love, and also how much should we allow ourselves to believe in magic. It also asks us how much we believe in other people, and if anyone has ever been on the forum they will know what a quick-witted and very darkly funny man Dr Martin is. But he is, I think, the very best kind of person, and writer - the type who hides his light behind wise cracks and quick quips, in for nothing more than to cope with the heartbreak he must witness every day. It's good to see that here, in this book which represents the real Dr Martin in all the best ways, we see a man who clearly believes in the magic of love.

And so do I – and I believe in "The House on the Fjord" which is why I have shelved it.

Best of luck, Martin.

Martin, Martin,
This story is.....amazing. I am speechless.
What a treasure, imagination gone wild and profound introspective reflections that ring so true. I don't even know what else to say about this. I am stunned. On my shelf.
Jeff

OK. Anyone with this attention to detail and accuracy:

“I just sat there on my jetty, skimming stones across the water. Skip, skip, skip. They always skipped three times, without exception. Curious, don’t you think?”

I will believe when he tells me:

“I must admit to some mystified enjoyment as I watched the angels swoop low over the water of the fjord like small birds hunting insects. Sometimes they soared high into the cloudless sky then hurtled downwards and crashed into the fjord and evaporated in a puff of incense....

Over the course of the days, or weeks, that I had been there, I’d seen triple headed stags chasing embarrassed looking leopards along the shore, gulls heavy with precious jewels flapping between the trees and illuminations of romantic melancholy swirling across the fjord – colours that sang without actually being heard. “

I have read a discussion about “florid” writing. All junk. Writing should make the spirit soar, not sore. This had me flying, expectantly looking to take more gems off the lake with the angels in tandem.

I was not to be disappointed. Read it yourself and you will see.

But also the surprise. How could anyone see anything like this coming:

“I opened it to find a young woman in a white gown... Her skin, I noted, was flawless.... She stared at me for an instant then reached out and handed me a plain brown envelope. I opened it with a frown to find it full of a sparkling red powder. I sniffed it and then dipped my finger and ran the powder across my tongue. It tasted like mint.
‘What is it?’ I asked, looking up at her remarkable face the brightest emerald green eyes; tousled raven black hair.
‘The remains of an angel.’”

Quite brilliant.

And as for “We made love there on the jetty,” being too soon. What took you so long is my response!

And “a poet bream rose from the depths” is simply sublime. Anyone who knows that languid beautiful fish with its slow easy rhythms would appreciate that. Anyone who does not know that beautiful fish should still appreciate that.

And by this time it was getting ridiculous:

“Long dead friends blew tender bubbles of pleasant memories that entered my nose and fizzed like slow burning phosphorus, filling my limbs with joyful thoughts of unending companionship;”

There is nothing more to be said. I intend to read all of this; but in terms of backing, that need not wait a minute longer. Backed as I soar.

What an impressive group of mythical creatures you have created. Great imagery and beautifully written. Backed with much pleasure. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

What genre could you possibly put this in? It's barking mad, horrific, magical, miserable and marvellous all at once! It reads like a sort of Lewis Carrol allegory of the power of emotions and friendship, and of knowing one self and of facing one's darkest fears. I really didn't know where you were gong to go with this so it kept me firmly hooked all the way through to the climactic ending! I know this is a book that will remain in my mind for quite a while so without a doubt it must go on the shelf... at once!

M&J
GRAEMOR

I came back to read more of your book. Your writing is really written well with great descriptions and imagery. I also like the dialogue. Good read.

A most frightening end to chapter 3, Martin; an ending about Peter's mother that, like her son, I felt hard to 'endure' ... The pink egg dropped in the fjord, Suzie the dog, on fire; and getting lost in that long, long grass down in the cellar: all strange and disturbing stuff; disturbing and at the same time words from one with an undoubted brilliant imagination ... Writing way beyond my limited intellect, but writing, I'm sure, of high quality. Tolvo (Frank).

This is beautifully written...but I knew it would be from the cover and the pitch. I do hope that HC sees how wonderful this story is and publishes it.

I can't comment on the poems (I know nothing about the poetry craft, and besides, your prose is like poetry to me.)

Shelved without reservation.

Cheers,
Sheryl (comment on mine? backing optional)

Martin, my comment: Part one of chapter seemed to me terribly shocking, but terribly true of the thoughts that pop into our minds sometimes; thoughts we don't want to face any more. I'm begining to hate the soul of this fjord - should I? I suppose so, because Peter and the forest man agree with me: 'We kill the fjord,' they say (I notice the fjord is now a male).

'Your dog is a ghost from your memory. Yes? Your past life?' Now I worry about Suzie the dog, and I understand why she tore George the forest man's trousers ('Suzie rumbled and I caught George flinch' - I didn't quite get that line).

'And then we'll get out of this place, all four of us, and have a bloody big party on the beach somewhere.' A note of happiness here- I like that. Good to meet Mr. Fjord in human form in St. Pauls.

Writing again in this chapter which seems to me to attempt to analyse the vast intricacies of the mind. Difficult for a simple man like me to understand, but writing that even a simple man must recognise as most exceptional. Tolvo.

Martin: 'Can you endure?' Peter's mother asks, and her son doesn't answer - and I felt the same after following Peter, Sarah and the man from the forest down into that cellar. I was scared I'll tell you. Understanding this chapter was for me like trying to take in that shocking Guernica picture by Pablo Picasso. I know Pablo's creation (and your writing) is terrific but I struggle to grasp it all. Peter says some wonderful things: 'My legs felt so heavy that I sympathised with the statue of David and his permanent immobility; 'A pastry flavoured cliche,' 'Better now than never ... Never better than now.' All strong stuff ... but perhaps I don't have the intellect to appreciate your undoubted talent fully. Best of luck, Martin! Tolvo (Frank).

Wow. This is poetry. This is pure magic.

My condolences to those he left behind. I will shelf this book because I thought it was simply beautiful.

Shinzy :)

My first reaction was: the opening is pure poetry for the soul. A metaphorical dream, a wistful story full of beautiful imagery and metaphors and quiet pace. "Have you noticed that every silver lining has a cloud?" So I continued reading as I wondered where you were going to take the reader and what is the fjord? Is it the past? Is it fear? Is it fear from within yourself?

I'm sure that without reading the entire book I won't be able to discern the total meaning behind the book... and whether it will be achieved and whether the issues will be resolved.

One small observation. I would classify this as fiction and fantasy, and drop the thriller genre.

Based on your literary style alone, shelved.

Oh chapter two did not disappoint me. It is well written and really should read by the entire group here. Great read.

Loved this once, loving it again as it spends some more time on my shelf in honor of a very gifted writer. Peace be with those he left behind.

How could I not put this back on my shelf again in honour of this so talented writer.

On my shelf again in honour of a very special man. Martin I will remember you with every waxing moon

This wonderful book is back on my shelf for the third time. The first happened when I was doing that daft thing of trying to get to the editor's desk. The second time is when I went back to it after the race for the desk was over and I read and loved it. Now the third time is in memory of a great writer and a wonderful book.

You are on my shelf Martin, in honour of your memory, Annabelle x x x

In honour of Martin Horton, a brilliant man and one of my best friends, I am keeping his book on my shelf until it is taken away.

CHAPTER 1
Very catchy beginning, I must say: seems ordinary for all of one and a half sentences, and the reasonable tone of voice makes the “angles” part all the more arresting. The next few paragraphs are completely bizarre. Enchanting, but bizarre. Why might we “expect” though, that the protagonist doesn’t have any visitors? We’ve not established yet that there’s any particular reason for him to be a loner, and his rational voice tells us he’s not crazy, so that wouldn’t be it.

This work so far is redolent with imagery, and so much I like. However, I’m not fond of the poem for a couple of reasons: first, it seems mostly to recap things we’ve already been told in prose and, second, its cadence and rhymes are all over the place – they don’t seem to follow any kind of set pattern. I realise that’s not essential in poetry, but I’m kind of traditional with my poetry tastes. It’s personal, of course, so feel free to ignore (as with everything I say!).

What is the main character wearing at this Halloween party, I wonder? “I wish I had two hearts. One wasn’t enough for moments like that.” – stunning. Beautiful idea with the balloons too; I don’t know how you came up with that but it makes a twisted sort of sense.

Second poem (in part 6) is much more up my street. The dark cellar intrigues me, but I’m a little afraid to enter it myself. Assuming your storytelling doesn’t fail you there, I’m quite honestly afraid of the nightmares it might throw up for me tonight!

I’m sorry, but I have to stop here – you’re making my head spin and I could honestly write paragraphs and paragraphs of praise and questions. This is simply magical!

OVERALL
I can’t say I can even begin to understand what this book sets out to achieve, but I do know that the writing is at once strange and beautiful. My critique seems sort of pointless because of this – I may be so far off the mark!

The whole thing feels like a dream – imagination run wild with nothing to keep it in check. You pluck masterful simile, metaphor and imagery seemingly out of the air, and for that reason alone you get a space on my bookshelf.

I feel dizzy after reading this second chapter, Martin. Astounding writing I think. Words plucked from among those treasures in your cellar; words to me with a beauty that is almost incomprehensible, but nonetheless, I realise, beautiful.
Back to reality: I did read and comment on your first chapter, but I must have pressed the wrong button or something and maybe they got lost down there in your cellar. 'My House on the Fjord' is very special. Tolvo. (Frank W).

A modern day Alice in Wonderland. I have never read anything like this, more's the pity. You had me at: "angels swoop low...small birds hunting insects."

You have a wonderful turn of phrase, too many enchanting picture to quote: I'd end up reproducing your whole MS. The evocative, slightly old-fashioned voice, grabbed me from the get go.

I can offer no critique. This may not be perfect, but if it isn't I don't know how to improve it.

Shelved in an instant.

Hi Martin,
You are definitely prone to fanciful whimsy, but all is forgiven because the writing is so beautiful, so mesmerizing that I feel like I’m inside a lush and magical world. One that is full of triple headed stags, angels swooping over fjords, Halloween parties, dogs that smile and where it is possible to be trapped in happiness.

There’s so many lovely sentences, like: “I wished I had two hearts. On wasn’t enough for moments like that” and I love the idea of the poet bream with its prophecies.

I shelved this after reading a few of your stunning sentences, but wanted to come back and read the end of the first chapter before commenting. I wish you all the best with this – you’ve shown me what magical, sublime worlds we can create when we let the imagination play.

Cheers,
Heather, Friends & Pho

Martin, I've read the first chapter and find this story written well. I like the way you use words to explain a certain scene or dialogue. You have pulled me in to read more and I will. I just need to play catch up with the other 'watchlist' books. I really liked the last line, as other sentences you've written, but this one really gave me a feeling of being there and seeing it. "Our sweat coalesced as pebbles and a tame mist swept them off our bodies and scattered them across the shore." I word 'tame' is excellent in this sentence.

Your writing is easy to read, and your descriptions evocative.
Good luck with this.
Caro

I've been reading some of your novel, and I must agree with the posters who have complimented you on your vivid descriptions. This is a novel I would buy and read.

Is there a reason you split the scenes in your chapters into parts (Part 1, Part 2, etc.) instead of just using a scene separator?

This is beautiful. I am sure there are those who will complain that they don't understand the beginning, that there isn't a story--they aren't looking hard enough, or perhaps too hard. This is perhaps the only story there is, told in a way it hasn't been told before (and that's my bit of mysticism for the moment).

Your sense of poetry and the lyrical shows brilliantly in the prose--there are perhaps only one or two times that I thought a rephrase could improve anything (one of these was "Who put them there, I never found out" which I thought might flow better as "Who put them there, I never knew" but this is so minor, so tiny compared with the graceful flow of the words overall). I adored the contrast between the dialogue and the descriptions--the dialogue is solid, real, grounding, the description floats us away again on the surreal. It's a beautiful balance.

I will read more, for the sole pleasure of reading your words and unravelling the story further. I feel as though, in reading, I am diving into refreshing waters of your creation. Sigh. I feel better, happier after reading this. Shelved.

A mystical injection, reminiscent of Lord of the Rings. After reading 'suddenly found himself surrounded by magical creatures' I expected to be repelled by a world of cliches, but in fact it works, it's imaginative and it's enjoyable.

Backed.

Luke

This is just beautiful. Very emotive writing, paints a wonderful picture of the setting and a lovely theme. Great premise. Loved what I have read so far and look forward to reading more. On my shelf without a doubt and look forward to seeing this rise through the charts.

Dear Martin, I'v read chapter one again and it really is a classic. Can you avoid use of the word initial in first few lines of short / long pitch (not easy). 'Are alive as long as we remember them': I agree with that and I think your book will keep Paul Matthews alive for a long, long time. Curious, yes. My stones on water skip only twice. Yes, I think the writer is prone ... but to the great benefit of the reader.

The floating Chinese lanterns in the fjord were put there by the women of Thailand. I once saw them do that - a beautiful sight. What things in the cellar? I want to know. Your bream recites lovely prose, I think, and then he winks (I like that). I suppose fjord water is salty? Good old Susie the dog. Fizzed like slow burning phosphorous - reminded me of eating sherbet as a boy. 'As I lay two thousand feet below the surface' made me thing how a child in the womb might feel.
'Amity': I looked in my dictionary for this word. Should it be 'I looked up at an unfamiliar constellation of stars'? I liked the line: 'I wished I had two hearts'. Angle fish? Are they those anemone type fish that trail half a dozen lines? 'Sink into the water and fade like coins thrown into a wishing well' - very good indeed. Should 'What you do mean? I want you.' be 'What do you mean? ... Or did I get that wrong? (I'm not clever enough to understand Raoul and Christine Daae).
Did Suzie let the wizend old lady in the house without a growl, I wondered. It's true about balloons, isn't it ... fair enough. Then a mystical poem, and a 'murder of crows' - well put. 'You,' she interrupted 'are the most average of men,' and after reading the last part of Ch.1, I feel the same: Perhaps because, being a sort of simple soul, I can't pretend to understand fully the deeper meaning of your words, but what I can understand is that your writing is exceptional and deserves recognition. Frank (Tolvo).

Martin, This is really a book inwhich you've used your imagination and brought forth an interesting beginning. Although I haven't read all of it yet, I plan on getting there. Good character building and visualization.
I will be back to read more, however, like you I find myself overwhelmed with my 'watchlist'.
Pattimari

Hello Martin,
I enjoyed skimming through this. It is written with a pleasant involving style which makes one want to read on. However, it is not quite my type of book. But if I had to make a criticism, I would simply suggest that you use a lot of long sentences which tend to cloud the message. Have you every calculated your Fog Index? However as and as an unpublished author I am not sure I am particularly well qualified to comment, so take what I say with a big pinch of salt. Good luck with this, I will shelve it.
Rheagan Greene - Unwelcome Reflections

Wow. What to say about this. Beautiful. Magical. Unexpected. Totally different from anything I have read before. Something out of a dream. Fantasy, and yet utterly believable? I have to say, surprisingly romantic for a male writer-- but that just adds to its charm. I am loving this so far, and will keep going. Thanks for creating this world.
BexMcK

Martin,

I don't believe I've ever read anything quite like this. It is poetry, it is music, it is color and sound. Where do you come from??? Beautiful!!

I confess to glancing at the comments left here... I don't usually like to do that, as I don't want to be swayed one way or another. But it is very obvious that I am not alone as I sit here, mouth agape, wondering at the source of your magic.

Gosh, I hope there is a market for this!! There SHOULD be... there are too few works like it in existence, I think.

Shelved, and wishing you the very best. Wow.

Karen

Oh... after that, I hate to mention this... but you're lacking some commas, i.e.'Think about it silly boy' should have one of those little danglers between it and silly... nit-picky, yes. But this is so close to perfect... best to 'make it so, Number One'. :o)

Your prose is beautiful. It is a bizarre yet enchanting read. I think you could make more of some of the dialogue, maybe bring in more of a conversation, there doesn't seem to be enough, and that might balance out some of the surrealism a bit more! (If that's what you wanted!!!)
An interesting read, deserving of shelf space.
Dora.

I'm speechless. This is magical. Your prose to start with and then everything else: the setting, the characters, the events and the feeling I came out with after reading it. “Staring into the entrails of my fear” wow, I mean WOW! And there’s a lot more like that, starting with the very first sentence. Shelved and really wish you the best of luck with this.

Martin

Many thanks for your kind comments on 'More Tea, Jesus?' - I have finally had a moment to pop over and have a look at this, and the first chapter (alas! all I have time for now) had me entranced. You have a wonderful style - so many lovely turns of phrase that I won't even try to list favourite ones - but it never goes over the top. An extremely difficult balance to tread and for your writing alone this is going on my shelf - the characters and story still feel a little ephemeral to me at this stage, but I will be coming back to this and look forward to seeing how it unfolds.

Very best of luck!

James

Our lives are as long as we remember them.

Beautiful prose. Well written and interesting story. Could this be considered magical realism? Not sure.

A red arrow? No way!

Shelved.

Janet

I like this chapter, though I didn't understand a lot of it. A previous commenter was correct--it's surreal. It might be a parable, I'm not sure. But your prose is rather good. I'm trying to see the commercial aspects of this novel, and I'm not sure if it's great or abysmal. Haha. But then I've read books that I haven't had the foggiest idea how they work and they sold millions of copies. Jonathan LIvingstone Seagull, The Alchemist, The Celestine Prophecy, etc., etc. This might be one of them--and I'm being totally serious here. It has that quality--a quality that I don't understand at all! WL for now, shelf when my space clears!

PS: In the premise, you mispelled its:

its offers of paradise, NOT it's offers of paradise.

Well, this is not at all what I expected. The surreal quality of this is very appealing. You create a sense of unreal reality in a strange and mysterious world in which the unusual is accepted as if it were normal. Yet there are harsh and brutal things as well as the wonderful. This is very well written. It stands out. I wish I had time to read it to the end and when I am unencumbered with stuff, I will. I can imagine seeing this in print. A place on my shelf without question.

Bone-warming. Hmm... Is the mc having lucid dreams, morphine induced dreams? been there.

Do you mean to say 'I looked up at unfamiliar constellation of stars'? or constellations?

At some points I'm actually singing the words they are so lyrical. I love how he told the dog to go home. Lots of smiling going on.

The bottom feeders consuming every morsel of my lesser qualities.... hmmm... deep, this.

I'll tell you why I fear balloons. Because it isn't just filled with air, but with the air from inside someone's lungs. It's full of their tiny specks of dna, their hot breath bigger than the long spirit drawing kiss of a lover. As it gets smaller, that person seeps about the room. If you burst it.... okay, I'll hush....

Yeah, it's like having someone's breath hanging in the air. Until it bursts and showers you with their cold forgotten dreams.

okay, I'll hush

I like that, the difference between always and forever.

This story is like a delicious dream. I'm still thinking morphine induced lucid dreaming. This is amazing Martin. Evocative. Shelved. Rachael (American Clique).

Surreal and ethereal. "My House on the Fjord" deserves to be on every the shelf of every home... it certainly deserves to be on mine. Rarely does an adult book come along that expounds on the magic of love - not bluebirds or gushy contrivances, but real love and the very real magic that is created by such feelings.

It reminded me of a grown-up version of David Almond's "Skellig"; a mix of reality laced with wonderland where one begins to question whether what one is reading is real or imagined. All I do know is that what Martin has imagined is sublime. Up there with the best... Another writer who, like Martin had a wonderful imagination but a pared back, relaxed style of writing is Tove Jannson of the Moomins fame. As there, so here.

And it is this question, not only of reality but of ourselves is what we take away from this novel. We ask ourselves how much we allow ourselves to love, and also how much should we allow ourselves to believe in magic. It also asks us how much we believe in other people, and if anyone has ever been on the forum they will know what a quick-witted and very darkly funny man Dr Martin is. But he is, I think, the very best kind of person, and writer - the type who hides his light behind wise cracks and quick quips, in for nothing more than to cope with the heartbreak he must witness every day. It's good to see that here, in this book which represents the real Dr Martin in all the best ways, we see a man who clearly believes in the magic of love.

And so do I – and I believe in "The House on the Fjord" which is why I have shelved it.

Best of luck, Martin.

This is sureal. I like your phraseology. IE the line regarding the bellys of otters. A little bit of through the looking glass.

Hi Martin, Bizarre and ethereal. Once I got into it and the argument with his girl being a real thing, I comprehended the fable of Peter’s thoughts being purely what he wanted them to be. I liked the continued problem of the fjord holding them, his girl like its concubine, and him “trapped in happiness.” Then I noticed interesting imaginative phrases: a balloon being nothing except an expectation of noise, “a snowman playing chess with an albatross”, the image of his girl sitting on a lighthouse. He admits his madness in his thought of being dragged as a baboon into St. Paul’s Cathedral. It became compelling with the forest as the escape and the cellar as the horror. I guess to make this more readable, you could thin some of the thought imagery at the beginning and maybe some as you go from these arguments to the allegorical actions. So that the reader can find the adult fable line. I was reminded of The Crock of Gold. Catching! Shelved – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

Martin - You drop the reader into a strange and fascinating world, using wonderfully descriptive prose. Your writing reads like an epic poem. Your descriptions bring an amazing menagerie of creatures to life in a setting that is mind-bending. This story reads like a dream that one awakens from and remembers for a few moments, planning to write it doww, but never does. Seems you have captured a dream. Although I won't be moving on with much more of the tale - it is not what I usually enjoy - I am shelving it because your talent as a writer merits that this piece move up the ladder and be seen by more. Best luck/

I love fantasy books for children but haven't really gone for those written for adults other than LOTR. But I really like this. I have talked to alot of people who've read the shack (I haven't) and loved it. I think this is a better concept than that. Your writing is beautiful.
Shelved,
Barbara
(The Sea Pillow)

Beautiful poetic writing. Imaginative mood-stirring prose. What more can one want for a pleasnt read that drags you into it's pages.
Lovely,
Shelved,
Best,
Fred

Martin, this is quite, quite beautiful. I love the lyrical quality of your writing and the dreamlike poetry of the whole thing. I was reminded very much of Lanark by Alasdair Gray. The ideas are intriguing and some of your imagery is just amazing. I feel the chapters are perhaps slightly long and could benefit from being broken up a bit more. I say this just because there's some really stunning stuff here coming hard and fast after each other and I think it would perhaps benefit from being given more room to breathe. But definitely one of the most original works I've seen on authonomy.

Martin, I guess you're a bloody genius. How can one person go from lyrical prose poetry or whatever you call Fjord to a literary sexually perverse inferno. I am going to have put you again on my bookshelf as soon as I get two spaces, your angelic side next ro your devilish one. Amazing talent. If I had a hat that you could see from where you are, I would take it off to you--silly flowers and all.

I don't have to wish you luck when you have this much talent--but I do, anyway..

Jan
THE COBRA AND THE MONGOOSE

The imagery is fantastic. My favorite is the sad-eyed buffalo: why? We see him, where he is, who's he's talking to and his reason for the conversation. That's the bar you've set for yourself. Other images are fun, but without that kind of grounding, can sometimes tend to simply be lists, as if you're simply trying to be outrageous for the hell of it.
Another great image: the girl is unhappy with him, and throws the fish off of her, one by one. You use that movement to show us her disappointment. And unlike a simple list of fantastical creatures, there's a reason.
I wanted, yearned, for more story and kept going to get one! The concept of a fellow who's never quite satisfied for the moment is a good one--but it's cerebral, and we still need a story. Even the balloon stuff gets too pedantic, as if the author is stopping for a lecture.
I don't know if you need the hero to address the audience as if we're old friends. Personally, it took me out of the story and since it's so vague, and only occurs every now and then, if there's no reason, I suggest deleting it altogether.
You're on to something quite marvelous here. Kudos to your wild and wooly world. Shelved.

This is really good! I love how you just jumped right into the descriptions! And it's so fast paced that i was pleasantly surprised. Most stories that drone on with explanations tend to lose me as a reader but not this one. Reading the first couple of chapters here was like watching it happen and thats a rare quality to have.

Dear Martin, My House on the Fjord is an enchanting, lyrical read, powered along by strong descriptive passages and backed by a great imagination. All best wishes, Andrew.

I can see why this polarises opinions. It's an original setting and voice. There's some beautiful language and images here. I'm not sure I could read a whole book of it, but it's not aimed at someone like me.

That said, I know it's first person, but in some parts of this it feels like you are not merely telling a story, but asking the reader to get involved: .. "curious, don't you think?" or "Hmm. Perhaps I am..." For me, I'm happy enough to listen to a story without the writer seemingly deliberately trying to drag me into it. I found myself digging my heels in, rather than be pulled in. That's just personal opinion on style, however, and I would understand why you might want to keep it. In either case, I would personally recommend present tense to keep that immediacy you seem to be chasing.

I'm going to back this, but want to point out that there is some inconsistency in your tone and language, awkward or plain ugly clauses slipped in among your jewels...


"Total exquisiteness."

"less veracity."

"legitimise a reply"

Anything adjusted by "wholly", "totally", "completely" and "very" - weak modifiers that often detract from the naked words around them.

The above things are quibbles, of course, but they stand out in - weaken - a work that relies heavily on its style and use of language.

In conclusion, this is good stuff, but I think you can make it even better. As I said, not for me, but that doesn't stop me recognising quality. To leave you with something positive: it has been my experience that anything which polarises opinion often wins awards, precisely because it demands an opinion, either way. It's the stuff that everyone likes a little bit that gets forgotten.

Regards,

TomW