Giving It Over

I love the book and I am constantly reading it when I have free time. I have just one question, though. Why is chaper 4 in third person when everything else is in 1st? I also think the characters could use a little more discription.

All in all, I love the book and I can't wait to keep reading on! (:

-ShanaMK

Backed with pleasure! Joss Morris (A Bore No More)

This is lovely. I think you are smart to open with the relationship between Lynn and her own mother, and her thoughts on weight gain. This sets the tone for what is to follow. Lynn comes off as a strong narrator. I trust her instantly because she shared thoughts that not everyone would be proud of.
This is well written and will definitely appeal to your intended audience. I just love it!
Backed,
Ellen
(Thoughts of a Teenage Girl)

Hello! My name is Lindsay and I am seeking some feedback for my book, Parker and the Parallelium. I'm hoping to find some good advice for my next round of edits. Anything you could offer would be greatly appreciated! I'd be happy to swap reads if you are interested- just let me know. Thanks for your time!

Lindsay Nagode
Parker and the Parallelium: Into the Beyond

Nancy, this is good. Wonderfully down-to-earth and no-nonsense, but also very moving. I've delved into the experiences of girls like Lynn in much earlier times, and in some ways it's astonishing how little changed in almost a century.

Shelved.

Wow! Thank you, everyone, for reading Giving It Over and for your comments. I have a light week next week, work-wise, and look forward to returning the favor.

Someone made a comment about ultrasound not being a practice in the early '70s. You're right. And there is no mention of ultrasound anywhere in my book, so I'm a little confused about that comment. At one point, Lynn says that she's just sure she's going to have a girl, but this is just her teen-aged psychic, all-knowingness talking.

LOVE IT! Nancy, this is brilliant. I love the way you write. You're style is very frank and honest. YOu don't mince words and you don't talk down to your readers or assume that they know nothing about sex and what can happen when you do "it." The characters are very real and make you want to get to know them more, if I wasn't so ridiciculously tired, I 'd stay up later and read the rest of it, but being 7 months pregnant myself, I'm going to have to call it a night! Well done. You have my backing:)

Nancy,
Enjoyed what I've read of this - three chapters - and I'm putting it on my bookshelf because it looks like it'll be interesting, funny and touching. Very minor typo is that it's a dessert being put in the fridge in ch 3, not a desert. * smile *
Things were SO different back then and I think you've got the atmosphere nicely.
Um, just checked the other comments and I think Sue is right re using the ultrasound for sexing the baby. My first son was born then and I never even had an ultrasound!
Good luck with this,

well hey. like the cover and title and the synopsis. bit of edge and i want in. should start sentences with a capital but hey it s the weekend. the dialogue is natural and unassuming. the narrator is believable and i don t know why, but well, likeable. like the interchange between first and third person. this is a long message for me which is i suppose a compliment. good luck and hi. on my watchlist.

Hi Nancy,

This looks really interesting. I've added it to my watchlist and will get a chance to read it over at the start of next week. Hopefully be able to give you some feedback then.

Rona

Just wanted to let you know that I am enjoying your book very much and look forward to reading more. Just one thing - the story takes place in 1973, yet Lynn finds out the sex of her baby via ultrasound in the first trimester. Was the technology available to find out the sex in 73? I didn't think so, but I could definately be wrong!

Hi Nancy, when I started reading your book I thought I will just look into it and then return to my work, but I couldn't stop until I reached the last sentence. You got me hooked - where is the rest? Seriously, I liked your story very much. Your style is genuine, I could believe that this was written by a teenage girl (a talented one). The way she talks, the things she thinks about; not for a moment was she out of character. Lynn is a strong person with an authentic voice.
The theme of your book is interesting and I like the way you handle it. This is an important topic and I think you just have found the way to make teens want to read it without feeling they are being talked condescendingly to.
I hope you will get published, I really do.
Best,
Csilla