Book Jacket

 

rank 1742
word count 24510
date submitted 10.04.2009
date updated 03.03.2012
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Historic...
classification: moderate
incomplete

Houses of Sand

Anthony Litton

Early 20th century Arabia's at war. Narash, a small sheikdom, fights to survive against a background of family betrayal, inter-tribal warfare and waning Ottoman influence.

 

It’s the early 20th century and war rages across Arabia. Faoud, ruler of Narash, a small coastal Sheikhdom, battles to maintain its independence.

Weak, exiled and desperately trying to maintain his shifting bedouin alliances, he has, simultaneously to keep enemy tribes at bay while dealing with deadly internal conflicts raging within his own family; not least with his own wife.

Faoud and his powerful mother, the Sheikha Faroum, realise that Narash’s greatest strength – their excellent harbour and trade routes, are also their greatest weakness, as many powerful enemies covet them.

They know they can’t survive alone, and must make alliances. But with whom? Certainly with other tribal leaders; but after that? Does he strengthen alliances with the Ottomans or seek support from the growing British presence?

Also central is Faoud’s relationship with a slave girl, who, after being captured by him in a murderous raid,has taken an oath to kill him. Meanwhile, she becomes a major player-behind the scenes, becoming increasingly wealthy as she trades in ivory, spices, slaves and guns.

Authors note: Though fiction, every attempt has been made for both historical and cultural accuracy. Should any errors have crept in despite this, I will happily correct them

 
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tags

, adventure, arabian history, battles, dynastic politics, family saga, romance

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221 comments

 

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Iva P. wrote 977 days ago

No clever publisher would refuse this superb story written by an author who clearly knows his stuff. Houses of Sand has all the makings of a bestseller. Shelved with enthusiasm.

Iva P.
Fame and Infamy
(history, comedy, crime and more)

Onthedottedline wrote 986 days ago

The descriptive images in this writing are quite sublime. You are clearly a master at conveying mood and atmosphere, and this lifts your story onto a level which few writers achieve. This is absolutely outstanding, and goes straight to my shelf. Best wishes, Tony.

Melimoops wrote 988 days ago

This is outstanding! Very unique and beautifully written. The tension you build with the revenge aspect of your story is tremendous.

I absolutely love this line:

“After that it poured crimson; so covered in blood it was like liquid red in his hand.”

Happy to shelve.

Melissa

Shelby Z. wrote 48 days ago

This is a very unique book. It is written extremely well.
It starts right into action then it slows down to develop the story.
One can easily tell that this was heavily researched by everything within your story. Every detail is well portrayed!
Very good work!

Shelby Z./Driving Winds

P.S. Please take a look at my pirate adventure Driving Winds.

strachan gordon wrote 80 days ago

Hello , an exciting start and a most unusual and interesting milieu , which I don't think has ever been written about in fictional terms before .You have created some involving material and I shall certainly be reading on . Watchlisted and starred. Would you have the time to look at the first chapter of my novel 'A Buccaneer' which is set amongst Pirates in the 17th century , with best wishes from Strachan Gordon

Ann Campbell wrote 82 days ago

Very good first chapter, immediately plunging into the meat of the plot with the attack and ending on a cliff-hanger note with the introduction of Shiraz. This keeps going in Chap 2. w. the dowager Sheikha introducting Shiraz to a book (a lovely passage suggesting personalities of both) and promises more. Want to read more.
Good scene setting with only a few necessary details, carpeted tents, scarcity of water etc. Dialog has just enough to feel archaic, addressing the Sheikha as 'Lady,' to show her rank, etc. Backstory and current predicament of the Hawk shown by skilfully worded references in the Sheikha's thoughts--i.e. no information/description overload.
Hate to quibble with such a good job, but in Chap 1, there is a semi-colon where a comma would work better and in the passage referring to the tribesmen being taken unawares ' . . .who until aroused . . . most realized . . . .secure' says essentially the same thing twice.
On the other hand, the mention of the horse stepping on a child's entrails captures the horror of attack vividly. I hope to shelve this soon, if I can bring myself to unshelve something.
Anne ("Polly")


Ann Campbell wrote 82 days ago

Are you interested in swapping reads? I just read two chaps of 'Houses of Sand' (excellent adventure) and plan to post a longer comment soon. Anne ("Polly")

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 441 days ago

Anthony,
The picturesque prose of "Houses of Sand" are true to the romantic notions evoked by the Arabian dunes. The stark beauty of the land and the cruelty of its people provide an apt backdrop for a harem girl's determined climb up to respectability through clever politics. Having read the chapters, I can see more excitement looming up ahead.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 441 days ago

Anthony,
The picturesque prose of "Houses of Sand" are true to the romantic notions evoked by the Arabian dunes. The stark beauty of the land and the cruelty of its people provide an apt backdrop for a harem girl's determined climb up to respectability through clever politics. Having read the chapters, I can see more excitement looming up ahead.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Sharatola wrote 784 days ago
Barry Wenlock wrote 794 days ago

Hi Anthony -- I read this a while ago, but failed to comment.
One word is enough -- excellent.
Sorry it took so long and that it isn't constructive.
Best wishes, Barry
(Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys)

yasmin esack wrote 808 days ago

Fascinating and well written. Captures the reader's attention immediately.

AlanMarling wrote 810 days ago

Dear Anthony Litton,

Thank you for sharing your story with us. I skipped to chapter seven to cover less-traveled ground and was rewarded by Shiraz’s cautious use of mute guards who’re to catch eavesdroppers. She’s presented with the horrifying scenario of her ex-husband choosing her next husband, which you well describe with “an impotent tyrant trying to pluck the juices of youth from her body”. Instead she has the flattering offer of a young warrior, who would even divorce his other two wives so she could be his first. I believe that’d be romantic. Shiraz accepts all too quickly, and the older woman pokes fun at her for it. Shiraz makes the wise and kind decision of not asking him to divorce his other wives. You have insight into the finesse of court life, the politeness and light touches even when someone has the outright power to do something, such as visit his son or command Shiraz to marry. You set the stage for drama, pitting her son against her future husband for the throne.

I enjoyed your story. Bravo! Backed.

Best wishes,
Alan Marling

lionel25 wrote 812 days ago

Anthony, you have a professionally written first chapter. I like your descriptive style. Nothing really to nitpick there.

Backed.

Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

Telegraph wrote 818 days ago

This is and awesome narrative that is compelling in voice. You clearly mastered the mood and atomsphere read giveing it a unique charcter all it own. C W Shelved.

Jennifer Powick wrote 842 days ago

Beautiful writing. You have captured the essence of Arabia and the period in which it is set. A unique and tension building story. Definitely backed.
Jennifer Powick
The Shrawley Rabbit

SRFire wrote 846 days ago

Beautiful descriptions. Backed with pleasure, Sana

kizgikate wrote 847 days ago

Warriors, horses, harems and war-- ıt's full of all the good stuff that we read historical fiction for. It's well written and action packed....and it has to do with the Ottoman Empire, which is always an attraction for me. (One font style thing "wahhabi" should be in italics only the first time and after that can appear "normal") Happy to back this.

Kizgikate
The Sea Within
(which takes place in Istanbul)

Nick Poole2 wrote 851 days ago

Your opening is very similar to mine, except yours is much better and is set in an Arabia that really existed while mine is fantastic.

I'm sure I backed this before...but will do so again. We desert bandits have to stick together.

John Booth wrote 856 days ago

Descriptive writing that drew me immediately into the story - shelved

This is not my normal genre but I really liked your writing, especially the action scenes. And the prophecy was fun too, very filmic in nature. Excellent!

Good luck with this

John Booth (Shaddowdon)

Cameron Sinclair wrote 863 days ago

An excellen tale Anthony, well writen and action packed. It is very vivid and real and depitched the desert people with just the right amount of the familiar. Very well done! Backed!

Duane March wrote 866 days ago

Anthony, well done! It evokes the scenery and majesty of Lawrence of Arabia!
Backed with great pleasure!
Duane
"Kings and Tyrants"

paxie wrote 867 days ago

Hi Anthony.....

The opening didn't really work for me...I thought the long sentences did little to create tension.....Short snappy sentences would in my opinion have increased the pace and given more urgency to what you were saying
eg....

heralding the dawn.......heralding dawn.....
had felt themselves safe........felt themselves safe.....

nothing stirred....(this is a powerful statement).....no need to say , not even this and not even that......

Oblivious to the danger.....Oblivious to danger......
not to let one person escape.............let no one escape.....

As Faoud's horseman hit them with the speed and ferocity of a cobra's strike....
Faoud's horseman hit with speed and ferocity, like a cobra's bite.....

I read this aloud, I do sometimes, when something tweeks my mind but I'm not quite sure what it is......I think you have a few too many 'the' and 'had'.......

As for premise and plot,,,,I can't fault it....I jumped ahead to your loaded Chapter 3 and was able to feel grounded enough to relate to the storyline....

I enjoyed the read....Hope my comments help...

Shleved with pleasure....

I agree with your naming & shaming idea.......

harveya wrote 867 days ago

Very vivid writing...fun to read, promising much excitement and drama. Very enjoyable read and backed with pleasure. Harvey Ardman

Eleanor Anne Dudley wrote 870 days ago

Dear Anthony.
You write with a distinctive style, your book came recommended and we will recommend it further.
A very chilling read, your character Foaud is a real killer, cold-blooded, merciless.
Backing it.
Eleanor and Sharkey.

John Harold McCoy wrote 874 days ago

Hi Anthony. Your pitch promises a lot happening in this novel.
Read the first few chapters. Very nice writing. Good development. Comfortable to read which is a good quality in my opinion. All in all, I think it's a darn good job. Well worth backing. On my shelf and the best of luck with it.

John Harold McCoy - Bramwell Valley

Beval wrote 876 days ago

This is fascinating and captures a part of the world few in the west are familiar with. I thought the descriptions of the desert very beautiful.
You've got some good characters as well and a well crafted and promising plot developing, my only problem is there is too much tell and not enough show. I'd like to see details and plot line emerging from interaction between characters rather than being told what is happening.
It has enormous promise. Backed.

Jupiter Echoes wrote 877 days ago

Gripping stuff. You write very well. Solid, yet evocative description of scene entwined with action. A nice style, one i try to follow myself.

Obviously,

BACKED

L Roger wrote 885 days ago

Well thought out story. You should let your characters tell it. Some of your similes seem forced. Your narrator is speaking too much. In my opinion, your story would be better told if your characters if your characters discussed, argued, berated, etc.
You do seem to know your subject and it shows as well as helping your readers to believe in what you're telling.

Raymond Nickford wrote 898 days ago

You well evoke the furtive as Faoud 'sat motionless' in the stillness of the desert, any peace or beauty of the desert lost by the moment of brutal carnage.
In the opening descriptions you select just enough information to garner immediacy, plausibility and reader involvement before the reader is grabbed by, 'He and his horsemen hit the camp within seconds - their surprise complete.'
'Satisfying' evidence that the bullets hit flesh, made me wonder whether killing - even of an enemy - should be satisfying. Yet you do bring home the truth: that it is Faoud's life or his enemy's and, if you or I were Faoud, then it would be satisfying - in the sense of having the assurance that our lives would have been spared. Indeed, we might assume that if Ibrahim ibn Khat had possessed a less compacent military strategy, then he would have made mincemeat of a Faoud sleeping in a tent.
The carnage is at its most raw when the weapon 'slipped in the bloody entrails of a child' and then it's the turn of Khat's head to go through the bacon slicer. And while on bacon slicers, it's the easier to understand why the little girl describes Faoud as 'pig's breath.'
Yet it's refreshing to find humanity in Faoud's mother as Sheika Faroum offers a bathing to the dishevelled girl who is Faoud's conquest.
For your research, integrity of detail and setting - the more engaging for having been placed in 1904 - shelved.
Ray
(A Child from the Wishing Well)

nillan wrote 914 days ago

Anthony,
Your book certainly gives me the impression that I am seeing a film - maybe Lawrence of Arabia. You really know how to convey the atmosphere to your readers. Beautiful. I am going to shelve it.
Nillan
Blue-eyed in Luhya-land

Troodo wrote 919 days ago

Houses of Sand
Anthony Litton
This is an old bug but none the less true, you use too many was and had, which are telling words rather than showing. You also use too many words in some sentences – for example: Faoud’s scimitar flashed, rising and falling with bewildering speed. – you do not need and deadly precision it slows the pace. Having said that, and I hope given you something to think about, I will shelve this on the basis that it is a very good story full of excitement and Eastern promise.

Troodo,
The Rose of Gildvadane.

Or
Faoud's scimitar flashed, rising and falling with bewildering speed and deadly precision; now it poured crimson, dripping with his enemies blood.

chris burton wrote 921 days ago

What a great setting for a book and you cant help thinking of the theme to Lawrence of Arabia when you are reading it! On a more serious note, some of your paragraphs are a bit lengthy which takes away from the otherwise fast pace of the book. There does seem to be two different styles of writing within one here and I would look carefully at how you want your writing to be perceived.
All in all, developing into an epic, but perhaps with some work to be done. Backed, because it has great potential.

Melcom wrote 927 days ago

Captivating writing, really drew me in from the word go. I'm surprised you haven't made it to the Ed's desk before now.

Backed with pleasure and pride.
Melxx
Impeding Justice.

gillyflower wrote 927 days ago

Talk about ending on a cliffhanger! I really want to know what's going on in Faroum's head, as well as why Faoud suddenly decided to divorce Shiraz. There has to be a reason. You have developed your characters brilliantly. I started off hating Faoud in Chapter 1. It was his relationship with his little brother Mohammed - fledgling - that first made me feel some sympathy for him. Then, as you brought the reader so close to him in the various fights, attempting to take the central fort of the city, and then against Saud, it became possible to see him as a hero instead of a villain. You did this by allowing us into his head, but also by the excellent descriptions of the battles. Your style is good, short clear sentences to move the story on, but descriptive power freely employed at moments when it's appropriate. The description of Shiraz as War Queen is only one of these moments. The opening, with Faoud seated on his horse on the desert hilltop is very impressive, as is the battle cry followed by the horses sweeping down to the attack. The atmosphere evoked reminds me of Flecker's 'War Song of the Saracens,' one of my favourite poems for many years now. And talking of poems, your own poem, the chant of the Holy Man, it great, and adds considerably to the effect you are aiming for in this book. An effect, I believe, which you have consistently succeeded in bringing about. Many congratulations.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

Mascutt wrote 928 days ago

Wow! This is amazing. Nothing I can add. I am captivated!

On my shelf
David:)

Christi Parker wrote 929 days ago

I would assume historical books set in foreign culture would be difficult for a writer but not for you. The story flows well, the narration highlites the nuances of the Arab culture well, making the plot believable. Would like to see this as a movie! Good Luck. Backed.

Thomwest wrote 938 days ago

Anthony. My nitpick first -- I would knock a few adjectives out of the first paragraph, it just looks overworked and clumsy. Once that's out of the way, you're into the makings of a cracking thriller. It's an intriguing book and I'd love to know more about your research. Pity it's incomplete here. Backed! Cheers. Tom (White Skin, Black Hearts)

NoraD wrote 941 days ago

Have finally mader a start on "Houses of Sand".
Excellent descriptive writing, which makes it easy to immerse oneself in this strange culture. The slave girl is promising to be a wonderful character ... Will hang on in there, find out what happens next ...
May make my shelf, when I've created a bit of space there.

Pat Black wrote 946 days ago

Great set-up for an exotic historical adventure. We have the idea of blood feud firmly established, even as the raid takes place and scores are settled. Then we have the almost biblical notion of the woman making her way through the desert with an infant in tow. And a great villain in Faoud, heartless and greedy. Great adventure; I couldn't help but think of Maurice Jarre's theme tune for Lawrence of Arabia!

All the best
Pat Black
Snarl

Richard Maitland wrote 952 days ago

I am sure that there is a good story here (if the long pitch carries through its promise) but, sadly it is spoilt for me by that unfortunate desert-dweller, The Wandering POV.

First we have Faoud's thoughts. That's fine. Then we hear Shiraz's thoughts. Not so fine. Next, along comes the Sheikha Faroum and we are privy to what SHE is thinking. It all makes for a switchback ride that left this particular reader feeling dizzy. By all means have multiple points of view, but never in the same paragraph -- and, preferably, not in the same chapter. It's the hallmark of the amateur. If we are in Character A's head, we cannot know that Character B is poking out her tongue him, safely out of sight round the corner.

The convention for the change of POV within a chapter is to make a line break, or use asterisks, or show in some way that your reader is being taken out of one person's head and will be entering another. That way, the reader has a chance to identify with a character, which is at the heart of successful writing. If you, the author, are the Omniscient Voice, you are merely telling us the story -- and telling us how your characters felt. We, your readers, want to feel those emotions for ourselves. My advice, therefore, is to stick to one person's POV per chapter (or clearly-marked section within a chapter), and thus strengthen your writing.

A couple of nitpicks from the first chapter or so: "The first rays of the rising sun broke out, pouring down onto the sand". The first rays can't possibly pour down; the rising sun's rays come up from ground-level, like the footlights in a theatre, when they appear on the horizon. You might want to tweak this. '... "Murderer and desert scum" it's glitter clearly said'. Remove the apostrophe. It's a pronoun, not a contraction for 'it is'. And it should be "sheep's" not "sheeps' " -- "sheep" is already plural.

One other point that might help. I'm a great user of commas around clauses myself, and find them easy to read in my own writing. But when I came across them in your writing, because I was unfamiliar with the text I found the enclosing commas tended to make the reading jerky. (Also, I believe, they're considered unfashionable these days). So you might want to prune a few of these from Ch.1, to make it run more smoothly.

I hope these Comments help and wish you well with your book.

Archal wrote 954 days ago

This is a very intense description. After reading the first chapter, I want to read more. The only problem, so far, is that the paragraphs might be too long. It might discouraging some readers, although the storytelling itself is superb. I am backing your book, and will be back with another comment after I've read the whole thing. So far, its one of the best works I've come across in this site.
Ajaya

Patriots Without Choice

C W Bigelow wrote 958 days ago

Anthony,

Your style is flowing, descriptive and you have set up an epic vengence tale. I was left wondering about that 3 day trip across the desert. One paragraph. I think more detail about the hell of that trip would paint your villian - show him as even a more heinous character. Anyway... Shelved. CW (To Save the Sun)

dana bagshaw wrote 962 days ago

I was drawn to this book as I am interested in this period. Nicely defined opening, but perhaps a little too cinematic for my tastes. I was confused by the switch in view points so early in the chapter and without warning, such as a text break. Is this one of the things you are looking at in your re-write? If so, please let me know when you upload it again -- I'll put this on my watchlist.

JDuPlesys wrote 963 days ago

I know now why your pitch appealed to me, we have very similar styles. You get to the point with a fast pace and a brevity of words, a single correct word suits you better than a paragraph of description. I can't help but like this. You'll have great luck with it...JD

Pia wrote 963 days ago

Dear Anthony,

Being a hopeless romantic, only the last paragraph in you pitch made me klick on Houses of Sand, although I like the title, too. I spent some time in the desert, and love it.
Growing up in a harsh and abstract environment surely creates a special mind-set, different to the mind-set of those that are exposed to soft-water ponds and the varied colours of autumn in a wetter climate. The contrast has never ceased to fascinate me.
You brilliantly evoke an archetyplal, and historical world, which is enough for me to read on.

Pia (Course of Mirriors)

Karen Carr wrote 964 days ago

Another one of my favorite eras in history. I just got done reading a story in roman times, now I go to Arabia - let me tell you how much I love this land. I spent some time in Jordan and the images your story conjured up reminded me of that trip. I love stories with horsemen and scimitars, yours is wonderful. That is why it resides nicely on my shelf!
cheers
KFran

Allianze wrote 964 days ago

A good book is like good food, The very first taste brings back such good memories. I liked the premise and I love the period that you have situated your story in. Fouad is a MAN ... in a time when men were men! Will definitely read on! Backed!

edquinn wrote 964 days ago

After reading only the first chapter I feel you capture the majesty of the era....words like scimitar and henchmen conjuring up a world far removed from today.

Much appreciated

Ed Quinn (Donkeys kill more people)

Lorelli wrote 965 days ago

Hi Anthony

You quickly create a very real setting for your novel, one that is different from anywhere i've personally been, but feels real due to the picture you paint with your narrative. The characters seem to leap from the page - and through their interactions and actions the story sweeps the reader along as it unfolds.

Shelved :-)

Best wishes
Lorelli (The Man Whisperer)

Mardi wrote 965 days ago

Hello Antony! I have just finished reading the first two chapters of your book, and I will be backing it when I finish these comments. I love historical fiction and I've always wanted to learn more about the area of the world where this story takes place. Your story is compelling, no doubt. I do wish you would give us a little more description of the physical locale. Your character development of Shiraz and others is coming along nicely, tho. Basically, I like your writing style but I'm afraid, however, that you suffer from the same disease that I do, which is overwriting. And it can be fatal. I am learning that often less is more. Although your story is a complicated one, there are areas of narrative that seem to me to be overdone. I have made some comments, per chapter, but please know that I am no expert. I have been told, though, that I am pretty good at this so lets see what you think. My comments are just suggestions, to be taken or not, but I would hope that you will see, at least, what I mean by 'overwriting'.
CHAPTER ONE: In the paragraph that begins 'He and his horseman...', I would delete 'panicked' as you have said that they were 'stunned' already. Also, re-word to eliminate one instance of 'struggled' which you have used twice. You also say three times, in different words, that they had made a huge mistake by counting on their supposed safety. Again and still in the same paragraph, I would delete 'screaming' for more tension, as you go on to tell us of their 'cries'. Delete 'like his people' which is obvious. 'on the one hand' Perhaps change this to 'on the one side' which gives the scene a better logistical description. 'thought they saw why' I would change this to 'would see why' lending more immediacy. Perhaps end the explanation for Faoud being called 'the Hawk' after 'Deadly and unstoppable.', adding more tension as the rest seems extraneous. 'its glitter clearly said' I don't get this at all. 'His men never left able-bodied men alive' But you had told us earlier that the male prisoners would make good workers. Take out the reference to 'also' as it detracts from the drama of the scene. 'back to the remnants of his people or a grown man' I would simplify this to 'back to his own people or when he became a man'.
CHAPTER TWO: Delete 'Working toward the end she had set herself' as its obvious. The rest of this same paragraph seems too long. Cut it by half, at least, and simply say that she was determined to learn all she could and had already overheard a conversation that led her to believe Faoud's reign was shaky. Likewise, in the next paragraph, just tell us of the new friend that had not been as lucky as Shiraz, having been forced to leave her baby when she was abducted into slavery. Change 'I think he probably did' to 'I hope he did' which lends emotion, making the scene more personal for your reader. I would delete the entire paragraph that begins 'Ayesha, as totally...' as it stalls the flow of your story and, besides, your smart reader already knows the stilted role of women in that scenario. I think that, perhaps, you are trying to include too much historical background info into this one chapter. Your reader gets lost (at least I did) in the jumble of facts given. If ALL of these details are pertinent to your story, I would suggest that you sprinkle them throughout, as the characters arrive in your story. Toward the end of the chapter, the arrival of the strange visitor and all of his transformations is a bit confusing. Do you really need the intermediate transformations to make this scene work?
Well, that's it. Except that I feel you should find a way to include more dialogue, giving your reader some of the important facts that way, hiding them in natural conversations. Also, I need to caution you on your many uses of '-ly' words such as 'swiftly', 'nimbly', 'suddenly', 'totally' and many more. In almost every case (with the possible exception of dialogue), a sentence actually becomes stronger, carrying more literary tension, when these pesky adverbs are deleted. Try it and I think you will see what I mean. I hope you can dicipher my comments and I hope that some of them help. I really do think this is going to be, with a little honest editing, a great book someday. And the movie rights may make you a rich man. Backing it right now......

Tony Lewis wrote 966 days ago

You have a unique and lovely way of writing. The narritve flows like the desert sands in a storm, and the reader is taken with the flow all the way to the MIddle East. As atmospherically believable as it can get.
Not the sort of book I would normally read, but I enjoyed dipping into this one and think I might return for a later read.
Good luck to you - backed!

Tony Lewis wrote 966 days ago

You have a unique and lovely way of writing. The narritve flows like the desert sands in a storm, and the reader is taken with the flow all the way to the MIddle East.
Not the sort of book I would normally read, but I enjoyed dipping into this one and think I might return for a later read.
Good luck to you - backed!