The Second-Most Important Person in Clara’s Life
Clara had just finished smoothing out the creamy icing on her birthday cake. She had light-brown hair that she was wearing shoulder length and layered, and she had on a very feminine pantsuit that fit her perfectly. Her life was quite comfortable and Jerome, her husband and an architect, was charming. As for Clara, she was a psychology instructor at the University of Montreal.
In the days leading up to her of her thirty-fifth birthday, she began to think back over the road she had gone down since Elisabeth had helped her to open up her mind. Watching out the kitchen window, she saw her three wonderful children running from their grandmother, who was pursuing them in a game of cat and mouse. She appeared to be absolutely enjoying herself with her grandchildren. Emotion overcame Clara and, suddenly, a tear ran down her cheek and dropped onto the freshly-iced cake. Jerome, who had come home without Clara hearing, planted a kiss on her cheek from behind. He was a handsome young man, with pale skin and brown hair, dressed with a button-down white shirt that was slightly opened and white slacks. He jumped noticing that the skin on her cheek was humid.
“What’s wrong, my darling?” he asked.
“Nothing. Nothing at all,” she said as she tried to justify her tears. “It’s stupid, really.”
“Don’t tell me you’re worried about turning thirty-five!” Jerome laughed.
“No, it’s not that. I promise, it’s nothing like that. I was watching your mother running after the kids and I thought how nice it would have been to see mine doing the same thing…”
“I know, honey,” Jerome said as he placed his hand on the angle where her neck met her shoulder.
“If only things had been different with my mother,” Clara said.
“I know quite well that you and your mother don’t get along at all and I think maybe you should go talk to someone about it. I can tell the whole thing is eating you up inside,” Jerome admitted.
“Yeah, I know,” Clara nodded. “I’m sorry, but I’ve already gone through therapy. It lasted a few years and it didn’t help me resolve the major issues between Mom and I. My therapist helped me to identify one of the causes of the tension between us, but now that I know, I don’t know what to do,” she sighed.
Two little girls, one seven and one five years old, and a cute little three-year-old boy came crashing loudly through the kitchen as they tried to outrun the mean cat that was chasing them and avoid being caught. Their grandmother, exhausted by such a physical effort, leaned up against the table as she tried to catch her breath. With an elated look on their faces, Clara and Jerome smiled at his mother.
“I swear, they’ll run me until I die, the little monsters!” the elderly woman laughed.
The children, with growing impatience, were already calling her to come back into the yard and play with them.
“Let your grandmother rest up a bit, kids,” Clara yelled into the back yard. “She’ll come back out in a little while.”
For Clara’s birthday party, she and Jerome had decorated the yard with streamers and balloons, and there was a fabulously decorated table set up in the shade of a giant weeping willow. They had put together a fancy buffet, complete with a big punch bowl of sangria, different types of picnic salads and cold cuts, fruit salad, and all sorts of soft drinks. The first guests were beginning to arrive and in just a few minutes’ time, there were a dozen children playing wildly in the yard that was illuminated by party lights that were fastened to tree branches. Like every year, their party was a great success.
Once the last of the guests had gone, Clara’s mother-in-law attempted to help her clean off the tables and pick up the mess in the yard. But she couldn’t hide her fatigue from her son and daughter-in-law; she was no longer a young woman and had gotten out of the habit of going to bed at 3 a.m. Clara assured her that she would get along just fine with Jerome’s help and asked Jeanette to head off to bed, who acquiesced without even the slightest protest.
The night air was fresh and the sky was full of stars. The crickets were still up and chirping excitedly. That was one of the rare moments of the year when it actually felt nice for Clara and Jerome to take their time before going to bed. Clara took her loving husband by the hand and they went to sit on the garden swing facing their beautiful Canadian chalet that looked out over their small, picturesque lake that was surrounded by tall pine trees.
“How lucky we are,” she sighed as she laid her head on her husband’s shoulder.
“You’re so right,” he nodded. “I realize quite how lucky I am. I have the most wonderful wife in the world.’
Clara looked at him and they exchanged a long kiss under the moon’s rays.
“Do you feel better now?” Jerome asked.
Clara suddenly felt a knot develop in her throat and a very serious look appeared on her face.
“The party was fantastic. But there’s only one person we invited who didn’t come. My mother. This year – for the umpteenth time – she didn’t feel like coming…” she said, attempting to keep herself from crying.
“I know, honey,” Jerome responded holding her in his arms. “But I also know that she produced a wonderful daughter, and if only for that, I thank her,” he continued as he looked at her with complicity.
“You’re amazing. I don’t know how you can possibly say that after everything I’ve put you through over the past couple of weeks,” Clara added.
“It’s just that I know that the woman sleeping inside you is wonderful. You simply have to let her to express herself. She isn’t dead, just…sleeping. And I honestly believe that. I know that you’ll be able to some day. I only hope that you do before I retire,” he said ironically.
Clara looked forward and once again allowed herself to be overtaken by the magic of the moment. A smile reappeared on her face.
“You know, when I was a teenager, you certainly wouldn’t have recognized me,” she said.
“Why do you say that?”
“Well, I was an introverted young girl who wasn’t at all happy with the person she was. I was incapable of opening myself up and seeing life as an occasion to come into my own. I was never able to picture building anything solid or durable, neither with men nor professionally. As a matter of fact, if I ended up finally believing that psychology was my chosen path in life, it was because I knew that there was quite a lot that I needed to discover about myself. It was never just a simple career choice, you know? Today, I know that I made the right choice, if only for that reason. In reality, when I finished studying in art school – which I had to hide by going to the university at the same time, by the way – I should have chosen that path from the start. The only subject matter that interested me or kept my attention was visual arts. And it had always been like that, even though I was never able to admit it to my mother. I couldn’t allow my passion to express itself openly. The only thing that mattered was that I not do anything, out of fear of disobeying my mother.”
She thought for an instant, and then added, “In reality, you wouldn’t have even noticed me around if you had seen me at that point in our lives.”
“I seriously doubt that! Jerome added. “You were radiant when I met you, and you still are, for that matter. Every single day, I am reminded of how extremely proud I am that you are my wife and the mother of my children.”
“Thanks a lot,” Clara said as she gave Jerome another peck on the cheek. “You might not have noticed it, but I sense that there is still something that has been left unexplained or is inexplicable about the relationship I have with my mother. There’s something connecting me to her and preventing me from getting on with my life and from becoming totally myself.”
“I think so, too,” Jerome said.
A bright light appeared in his eyes and a radiant smile lit up his face, intriguing Clara.
“What’s the matter?” she asked.
Jerome pulled a plane ticket out of the inside pocket of his jacket.
“I know that your being separated from your mother is painful for you, even more on your birthday than other days. So, I thought that it might be a good idea if you went to spend some time in your hometown, in France, with your friend Elisabeth. That might be a way to alleviate some of your suffering, don’t you think?” he asked.
“Elisabeth!” she exclaimed.
“Exactly.” Jerome went on. “She was the one who came up with the idea for the plane ticket, if you really must know…”
Jerome continued, “She has already helped you in the past with your problems with your mother. Maybe she can help again. And, even if she isn’t able to, it would do you a great deal of good just to give it a shot. How long has it been, two years since you’ve seen each other face to face? And another thing, you love traveling and my job keeps you from traveling as much as you’d like, and I know that. You’re on vacation. Come on, now. Enjoy yourself!”
Clara sat up straight and opened her eyes wide, as if she were astonished. An immense and warm smile appeared on her face.
“Your flight is in two days…if you want to go…” Jerome said. “My sister is going to take the kids, and Elisabeth is already expecting you. I took care of everything, so don’t worry.”
Clara couldn’t believe her ears. Shyly, she took the plane ticket from Jerome’s hand, checked the date written on it, and glanced at her husband. She finally said to herself that she absolutely adored the man sitting next to her, thanked him, and then threw her arms around his torso. Then they sank into a passionate embrace.