Appetites

I sat with the plan of reading a few chapters but I found myself already at Ch30, in no time. Absorbing reading. I'm definitely intent on continuing and finishing it. I need to know what happens to them all. This story makes leaves me feeling if you pour petrol on something and you go and throw a match at it that then there is little point calling out "fire" afterwards. I'm sure you know this is well written. Congratulations and well done. I would say good luck with this achieving commercial success but there's no luck involved, just quality writing and that deserves a run in the sun just like Sal's naked bum on the beach. Cheers, Anthony

JD

Hi there. Thanks for backing the Collector of Tales.

I started reading Appetites yesterday with a whole mass of mixed views. In probable order of precedence : lust, cynicism,curiosity, reciprocity, is it literature?, is it porn? do I have a calvinist ethic ?- no I'm a catholic ....

Within a few paragraphs I had dispensed with most of these and had literature in mind . Within a few chapters I was sharing some of the emotions and anxieties. I will read the whole book but it is going to disturb me, as it started to yesterday whilst reading. I am going to have to read it in tranches but that doesn't detract from its strength : in fact it just highlights some of my own inadequacies.

I think that it is well written and deals with the subject in a way that is frank and to the point but not gratuitous. To me the result is that what comes out so far is not a sexual roller-coaster but an emotional one.

Best of luck with this....it deserves

david

I think one of the hardest things to write are sexual or even sensual scenes in novels. There is even a raspberry-like award for the worst published sex scenes in novels each year. There are just so many bad ways to describe that act. Well, JD Revene must be like the literary karma sutra master. His writing is believable and hot, hot, hot.

Appetites tells a good story, and the sex is great. There is so much of it in Appetites that the reader almost becomes numb to it, which kind of mirrors the arc the characters follow. They seem to get less and less out of more and more. A cautionary tale? Perhaps. A great read? Absolutely. If you want a great story and sex done right, quench your literary appetites with this fascinating tome.

Hi JD,
there are very few books on here which deserve a second read. Appetites does which is why I have backed it again. I highly recommend this work to all who wrongly believe erotica to be sleaze in paperback form. The beautiful way in which you portray this potential crisis, laying bare emotions, revealing dangerous thoughts is genius. Erotica is beautiful and acceptable, you, JD, have just proved it.

Phil
Danny Murphy.

The writing here is exceptional.

I love the economy with words JD - like Sal’s extra marital - it’s short - sharp - no nonsense - but very expressive.

A style I’m particularly fond of.

I wasn’t sure at first if your choice of subject - erotica - would quite match the quality of your writing, but eight chapters in and I must say bravo.

To label Appetites as simply erotica is very much gross understatement - it’s much more than that.
If I may quote Sal once more - it’s a smorgasbord - a veritable buffet of emotional interplay, as well as the obvious sexual kind.

As for critical comment - I have none JD. You handle your book expertly well.

All the best with Appetites.

James

Wow... What a piece of work... Backed!!! Please check out 40...already??!! Angi ps... Read half of it on my blackberry...

I sat with the plan of reading a few chapters but I found myself already at Ch30, in no time. Absorbing reading. I'm definitely intent on continuing and finishing it. I need to know what happens to them all. This story makes leaves me feeling if you pour petrol on something and you go and throw a match at it that then there is little point calling out "fire" afterwards. I'm sure you know this is well written. Congratulations and well done. I would say good luck with this achieving commercial success but there's no luck involved, just quality writing and that deserves a run in the sun just like Sal's naked bum on the beach. Cheers, Anthony

This is very well written. I can't add anything to what's already been said. What I can see though, is a good story with a sinister feel about it, and one that will be difficult to put down. Well done and good luck with it, JD.

This is fantastic writing with the perfect choice of words to convey thoughts and emotions. I love the sexy relationship between Sally and James. No doubt on of the best books I've seen on Authonomy. It deserves to be on its way to the Editor's desk. I'm proud I decided to back this. Great Job!

Cat

Ha! Brilliantly written first chapter. Dare I move on? Part of me wants to to see what happens to the characters, (who I really like) the other part... (blushing) well you know.

What a great moral dilemma for someone who normally wouldn’t read this type of story.

That is an indication that your writing is superb! Great Job!

JD

Hi there. Thanks for backing the Collector of Tales.

I started reading Appetites yesterday with a whole mass of mixed views. In probable order of precedence : lust, cynicism,curiosity, reciprocity, is it literature?, is it porn? do I have a calvinist ethic ?- no I'm a catholic ....

Within a few paragraphs I had dispensed with most of these and had literature in mind . Within a few chapters I was sharing some of the emotions and anxieties. I will read the whole book but it is going to disturb me, as it started to yesterday whilst reading. I am going to have to read it in tranches but that doesn't detract from its strength : in fact it just highlights some of my own inadequacies.

I think that it is well written and deals with the subject in a way that is frank and to the point but not gratuitous. To me the result is that what comes out so far is not a sexual roller-coaster but an emotional one.

Best of luck with this....it deserves

david

I've never read a book as sexually strong as yours, I always thought they were just gross and perverted. However, after reading the first two chapters, I saw that how you wrote varied greatly from what I was expecting. The opening sex scene wasn't just some erotic escapade, but seemed to reveal more about the main character and explain his thoughts and feelings. Happily backed! I can't wait to read the rest tommorow! (I read between classes at college)

JD,
not really my kind of book although read 5 chapters. It is easy to follow and read nothing too heavy the sex certainly in these early chapters was very point to point if you know what i mean.
Not drawn to go further by any of the characters i've met.
sorry
:)
Diane

The flow in your excellent writing drew me on even though I didn't want to go where the words took me. I took your advice and read (2)

Descriptions are wonderful, the flash of lightning over the bay, but the inner conflict is the thing that draws the reader.

Backed with pleasure.

Great writing! All the dialogue does a nice job of keeping things moving, and you have a very easy-flowing style of writing. Can't wait to come back and read more after I catch up on my long watch list! Shelved!

Great pitch/plot, interesting characters, and excellent writing. Backed with pleasure.

DJay - Fine and Shimmering

Truly enjoyable. Wish I had more to say, but I think that about sums it up. This probably hits home for a lot of couples and you've given a tawdry topic a level a sensitivity that is well ... truly enjoyable. I will be back to read more.

Appealing.

I think one of the hardest things to write are sexual or even sensual scenes in novels. There is even a raspberry-like award for the worst published sex scenes in novels each year. There are just so many bad ways to describe that act. Well, JD Revene must be like the literary karma sutra master. His writing is believable and hot, hot, hot.

Appetites tells a good story, and the sex is great. There is so much of it in Appetites that the reader almost becomes numb to it, which kind of mirrors the arc the characters follow. They seem to get less and less out of more and more. A cautionary tale? Perhaps. A great read? Absolutely. If you want a great story and sex done right, quench your literary appetites with this fascinating tome.

Great writing deserves a full read. Erotica can be art if done with the story in mind. You have weaved a compelling plot. Backed.

I hope you will give mine a read and back it if you like it.
Best,
Robert
Golden Conspiracy

As they say, sex sells, so a book about sex - erotica - is going to have a big market - what's very interesting about this - as I read through some of the chapters - is the absolutely compelling nature, the way you let us get into the mind of James as he struggles with wanting to keep Sal happy and fighting his own insecurities - really well done -you absolutely deserve to be published - Backed and best wishes on your climb to the Ed's desk
Diane
Good Blood

I really enjoy your snappy style of writing, it makes the story appear fast moving and has a real effect upon the reader. I don;t think i've ever read any erotica but if this is what its like then i can;t see why everyone makes such a fuss about it! Brilliant! James, 'Their Limbo Lives.'

Hi J D,
Thought I'd better read Appetites before it disappeared onto the desk. I've put off reading the book for a long time because it is erotica--not that erotica doesn't have a purpose, but the purpose seems either so basic to me (sexual arousal) that it could better be served through another venue, or so convoluted ("This book isn't really about sex; it just uses sex as a means to express life's higher purposes." Come on!) that it seems disingenuous. Anyway, Appetites introduced me to a third purpose: a psychological examination of how a marital relationship could devolve into a compulsion for sex with outsiders and what the results might be. Here are my thoughts:
The pitch was extraordinary, setting up both the plot and the conflict in just a couple taut paragraphs. The writing style was also outstanding, sensual most often, tensely reflective and conflicted when appropriate and concise throughout. (I did want you to change one word: when Sally first spies Danny, you say that "she lingered on him"--the image jarred me as it implies that she was draped all over him for a long period of time [that came later]. Maybe her eyes or her gaze lingered on him would be better, or if that sounds cliched find another verb?) The story itself worked on at least two levels. On the basic level, the sexual scenes were as stimulating as I can imagine, so people reading for that purpose should have no complaints. On the psychological level, I caught some good hints about what you were after early on when you describe Jim's reflecting back on his mother's situation and resolving to "keep Sally from shutting out the world." The real insights into what led to the couple's decision to go this communal and experimental route come clear in Sally's thoughts near the end of chapter eight. Not surprisingly, much of the choice has to do with ego and self-esteem, and you present this idea through the somewhat confused muddle of semi-delusion and denial in which the characters would view their own behavior. This is a good tack to take, I think--realistic for almost everyone. There seems to be a third line to the book having to do with the saga of personal relationships among all of the characters and how they work their way into a sort of harmonious equilibrium at the end. I suspect I'm too cynical to latch onto this thread, but I'd need to read all of the intervening chapters to be sure. All in all, though, Appetites was a very satisfying read. Backed.
Niobrara Kardnova (Family Irregulars)

Wife read much of it last couple of nights and loved it !! So will back it.
Jerry [paperbats] Have you any children around that wants to read my Paperbats adventures?

Great pitch had me raring to dive in. The power of this potential threesome is lost in this opening chapter. The first scene does nothing, too generic (what's with the breaks, keep the scene rolling). Second scene, the same didn't grab me, it's a guy in a club watching his wife come back from the loo. I'd start as close as possible to his question 'spotted someone you fancy' and go from there - how many married couples have played that game, the excitement is in the fact they go ahead, but then you rush the scene. They'd talk about it more, get giggly, flirty, give the green shirt guy eyes - build the suspense. The alternative is to start the day earlier, wasn't buying the flashback scene in the kitchen, why not go chronological and build up to the club.

In terms of the writing, I think you try to explain too much. The para from Sally's POV 'Her eyes were dreamy', adds nothing and the POV switch is distracting. I wasn't getting that excited breathless feel of a 'boring' married couple, kid free and going a bit wild (for them). It's all a bit restrained. Needs much more dialogue, flirty language and behaviour. I really like the idea, but the writing is not pushing me to continue. Will read a couple more chapters. Let you know if I still feel the same. Jake

Appetites.

Airy writing with no wasted words and dense meaning propels the story while twists in the plot ensure its pace.

The change from past to present is a challenge that has been well-met.

Illusion and reality juxtapose to bring the anguish of modern living under scrutiny.

Much self-knowledge to be gained from what lurks in the sub-text.

Backed.

Azam Gill
“Blasphemy!”

I don't read much in this genre, but you caught my attention here. Sexy writing and good direction for the characters to evolve.

I'm perplexed that the story begins in the present tense in the first part of chapter 1 and then goes into past tense. That's usually a bad idea. Just do the whole thing in past tense.

Nice work. I'll back it.

Brian

Backed with pleasure. A very well written tale. I wish you good luck. Thanks for your backing. Eunice.

I'm not a huge fan of erotica, but I ended up reading cover to cover, and I like :) You wrote it very well, and now it has me wondering why this beautiful piece isn't in print! Backed a hundred times over :)

Saucy little book you've got there. I'm not a fan of erotica, but the way you lay out the plot in the first chapter is really great. I was very interested in the characters, and appreciative of the way you created the scene. Good luck!
Mike Vasich
Loki

This is beautifully written study of a marriage adrift, looking to fill its sails in a rocky sea of sybaritic excess. Yet it's not as simple as that sounds. The characters are complicated and cannily observed. There's plenty of humor here, and profound depth of characterization. James is a man forever doing what he doesn't want to because he thinks he needs to. The pathos of his life is well-matched by Sally's. She's a shopworn goddess, whom everyone tries to please, especially James, and yet there's always an emptiness that gnaws at her. They are each in their own ways likable, pitiable, even admirable. There's not a false note anywhere. These are real people.

Hiya Mr Revene,
just thought i'd let you know that i have placed your masterpiece on my bookshelf (i think that means i've backed it!).
now then, this isn't usually my kind of book at all. i mean you'll find none of that stuff on my bookshelfs!!!
(no, you'll find it tucked under the edge of my bed where i can read it in peace and give it the thoughts it deserves!!!! which is exactly what i'll be doing with this just as soon as i can get my hands on a copy!)

read the first two chapters. well done! you can surely write! i also like the economy of your words ... helps us get to the best bits all the quicker! so keep them coming!

Royston
(The Book of Simon)

Hello JD
Read the first 4 chapters and find your style very well done. You appear to know the material and how to deliver it well without being gross. (yes, double entendre intendend ;) ) This book would be very entertaining and that is what great fixtion writing should be in my opinion. backed!

I have no comments to make on the voice, grammar, or format. All very professional.

Jim is a great man and I hope Sal does the right thing and gives him all her passion...he deserves it!
PS-Love your dedication line too!

I wish you best of luck. Thank you for backing my work.

River Stone
The Secret Snow

This was a provocative and intimate look into the lives of a couple. You dialogue is very relaxed and straightforward, and your narrative never gets in the way of your imagery. Based on your stated genres, this novel should work just fine with your reader audience.

Hi JD,

Sorry for the long overdue reply! I have read through the first couple of chapters of your book and thought it was sensational. A very strong and daring attitude used to write the piece that definitely stands out!

Sincerely,

Anna
Crystallyn

JD--
This is quite possibly like nothing I've ever read ( novel wise that is...) and I like it. I'm a little surprised because personally I've always felt Erotica to be the dime store Romance sort of novel and never serious, but this... this is something else entirely. Very nice.
A.J.
Strangeland

JD--
This is quite possibly like nothing I've ever read ( novel wise that is...) and I like it. I'm a little surprised because personally I've always felt Erotica to be the dime store Romance sort of novel and never serious, but this... this is something else entirely. Very nice.
A.J.
Strangeland

JD--
This is quite possibly like nothing I've ever read ( novel wise that is...) and I like it. I'm a little surprised because personally I've always felt Erotica to be the dime store Romance sort of novel and never serious, but this... this is something else entirely. Very nice.
A.J.
Strangeland

JD--
This is quite possibly like nothing I've ever read ( novel wise that is...) and I like it. I'm a little surprised because personally I've always felt Erotica to be the dime store Romance sort of novel and never serious, but this... this is something else entirely. Very nice.
A.J.
Strangeland

JD--
This is quite possibly like nothing I've ever read ( novel wise that is...) and I like it. I'm a little surprised because personally I've always felt Erotica to be the dime store Romance sort of novel and never serious, but this... this is something else entirely. Very nice.
A.J.
Strangeland

The characters, especially Jim, far from serving as mere sex-crazed MC's, live in desperation brought on by marriages which turned into train wrecks. Their search for extra-marital bliss stems from the need to thwart a repeat of past mistakes and keep their marriages alive. I thought splitting the point of view proved brilliant, but I struggled to find a suitably complex motivation for Sal. Jim is definitely the most complex, well-developed character. Sal is definitely all about great sex, which is totally understandable, but she comes off as plastic and one-dimensional through much of the book. Jim is easier to understand, working hard at home, struggling at work, keeping the kids while Sal goes out to get her nightly dose of validation, trying to please his beautiful, aging bride. However, I wonder if Sal is really that simple. Even trophy wives aren't truly trophies, after all. They're women. I would love to see a bit more complicated chick working through the multi-dimensional aspects of womanhood (children, work, ambition, talent, skills) as the MC. The writing satisfies, economical, vital. And, yes, I'm glad you submitted this, because it's true to say that erotica is not sleaze anymore than Michaelangelo's David is porn.

Memphisgirl

Your writing is truly wonderful. It's a simple and straightforward style that I always enjoy, not wordy but always the right words. The conversation seems very real, as do the feelings.

Anne

JD - hell's teeth is all I can say! No wonder you rank number 6 with Appetites - so well written and of course the subject would attract almost everybody! Backed by Balepy (Freckles the Fawn - even my title seems a bit out of place beside all these comments!)

Hi JD,
there are very few books on here which deserve a second read. Appetites does which is why I have backed it again. I highly recommend this work to all who wrongly believe erotica to be sleaze in paperback form. The beautiful way in which you portray this potential crisis, laying bare emotions, revealing dangerous thoughts is genius. Erotica is beautiful and acceptable, you, JD, have just proved it.

Phil
Danny Murphy.

Could have gone through the whole Roxy Music back catalogue, but here's your tune I picked, playing match that tune today:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-samoAl17U

Sorry for the wait - great writing. Splitting POV is really difficult, but I think you managed it.

All the best, Lisa (Death And The City)

Can Sallys sexual appetite ever be satisfied. Give her the karma sultra to read.
Backed
Daniel Manning
No Compatibiliy

Interesting premise. Must have grown from your short story in danvcing anthology. The beginning, especcially the camareless Japanese felt rocky to me. It smoothed out and the voice took to the background after that.

I wwas mildly curious why he owes her so much but didn't feel cioonected to the curiosity emotionally - tell instead of show I guess.

You took a big risk starting off that way - hope it works out for you...I enjoyed the read.

See you at the ED.

Sincerely,

Will

Hi,

I just read through a few chapters and wanted to leave a comment.

This isn't the sort of stuff I normally read, so I can't really say how it compares to the rest of the genre, but I can comment on the writing itself. And, honestly, I see no problems with it at all. You do a great job of keeping the prose flowing yet descriptive, and the dialogue's believable and snappy. And we really do get inside James' head right from the off.

I'm more than happy to back this book and wish you all the best. :)

Pete

ps I do actually have 1 criticism: I've never seen a cameraless Japanese tourist in my life. :)

Hey JD,
Well, I read through chapter four, very sexy, good way to get the readers attention right off the bat. I'm backing it with the intention of returning to finish it soon. I'm a little overwhelmed with reading requests at the moment. You have a unique no-nonsense style, I like that.

Good luck
Cly

Hello, I'm new to Authonomy! Please check out my book, Not Alone, and let me know what you think. If it's worth publishing please back it. Thanks for your support!

Brilliantly written. Not my usual type of novel but it flowed so well and the descriptions were so vivid that I found myself wanting to read more. Backed.

This isn't my usual read (sorry, I know a lot of people will say this) so I can't judge it by others of its ilk, but what I see here is a well written and confidant book. The prose flows and is well paced. The sex is graphic but intelligently described and the characterization seems realistic and not just a backdrop for the sex. It has an emotional depth as well as erotic intention.

J.S.Watts
A DARKER MOON

hey thanks for the back. I really appreciate it. Nice pitch you got going there. Really has me interested. Totally backed. Thanks again.
Xenton W.M.

Appetites
By J D Revenue.

Hello JD, sorry I'm a couple of days late in reviewing, but have been busy here with homelife and trying to catch up on reviews. Anyway I'm here now so here goes.

Chapter One - A good start that draws the reader in. An interesting choice of genre, erotica. (I must say I have written this type myself too, but only short stories). I like d the way you wrote about the club, its descriptiveness brings good imagery to the readers mind.

7th line 'Aw, baby' should be 'Aww, baby.'

I like dthe line - The room should've been smoky, but new laws meant it wasn't. It shows the reader that it is based/ written in the present time.

I was a little confused as to who was talking, was it him or her? Maybe a couple of tags here and there will sort that out - she replied or he replied (said).

Loved this line too - A flash lit the cab, freezing Sally and Danny's embrace. Its a lovely line that triggers good imagery in the readers mind.

Not sure about the line - she licked debris from her top lip. It gave the image of her licking rubbish off her lip, maybe the word crumb would be better.

Chapter Two - Has been written really well. It flows well on the page - seemlessly and the sex scenes have been written carefully and tastefully.

Chapter Three - Goes more into Sal's feelings and emotions. It teeters on why husband and wife do down this route of escapism - her because she's a bored housewife who craves attention from her hubby, but doesn't get the amount she wants from him. A career man, who is so busy with his work that he neglecks his wife's needs.

Chapter Four - This is written in the same pace and executed as well as the last three chapters I have read. It goes on to show Jim's feelings and thoughts on experimenting with their sex lives.

I've enjoyed this, you make the characters believable and the reader can see how things can happen and then get out of hand. I would love to read more of this. I will come back and read more when I have the time and comment again on what I read.

I think you have a good story here. Not many people would even dare to go down this route, its only for the brave and experimental! Well done on what I've read so far.

Best wishes and good luck.
LIsa.
Grimeon's Pass.

What ghastly people. Well written though.Backed.