This cannot be a first chapter as nothing happens in the first chapter. Your theme of virginity and remorse for that lacks in the first chapter. Bland and unnecessary descriptions for nothing. Write something appealing, something sexy as the theme of the novel bases on virginity and lack of girl ... view book

Colin I've gone through your second chapter completely. Something bitter to share with you. As a writer and reader, I've edited. If you want to receive a doc file of your second chapter/first chapter i can share with you. If you want some constructive criticisms then i will share my comment with... view book

So many dialogues that you can club in the form of narration. Thoughts are not separated and all these sounds as first person. Would like to read the Malabar Rising. Presence of local expression can be minimized as you target an international audience. Would like to swap read if it is a romance?... view book

Sir, Shams and Samy confuse. How come Samy came all of a sudden. The use of pronoun he confuses more. Whether Samy was searching for Arumugham or Shams was unclear but when Shams chided it was clear. Could not read further. Check your ings. In the second sentence what were the sounds, ... view book

Start from the thought of Jackson instead of Regina. A little suspense as reader read and finds her murder. The conflict (Murder) in the first chapter and it is fine. Your pitch sounds interesting. A murder then attempt to cover up. A journalist who follows the case. I dont know what is inside ... view book