Good place to start - a move, a new home, an radical change in peoples lives, you have caught the sexual tension between them, introduced a few of the important (I assume) characters and the new alien location - all very well described and pleasant easy reading. There are a couple of 'tense' moments... view book

A few issues: I’ve come all the way from Winscosin, there is no way I am leaving until he is treated. Your choice lady, you can’t leave until you sign the registry. – You see the problem? One is refusing to leave the other is telling her she can’t – they are arguing on the same side not disagr... view book

Hello - I jumped to chapter 12 as a sample to review. Poor old John Baker! From the moment he was introduced untill his sad end - the plot was out. John's decline from confident gp to depressed suicide is a dark and slippery slope. You are graphic and precise, the basis of the plot is sound - and I ... view book

Descriptive, passionate, hard to read, great to read full of love hate and venom. Gosh, I'am impressed, you do write very strongly and at a pace that is addictive and harrowing. It will be an interesting read for the editors and I hope it does well. Hapless. view book

Kids storys are all about making the best of highs and lows, facing problems and overcoming them. I think you have challenged that and done well. Also - there is a market for this writing - so best of luck with it. Hapless view book