Hello, I read the first chapter. I found the third person omniscient POV a nice change of pace. The description is strong and the prose well controlled and specific and easy to follow. The dramatic question posed as to what the heck is wrong with this community is a very good one IMO. I was expectin... view book

Hi, just a little payback for your recent comments on my novel, Fortress of Ephemera. I read the first page or so of The First Phoenix and my feedback is thus just on that. (As Einstein said, “God is in the details,” so I have plenty to say anyway.) Hope you find something helpful here … Opening ... view book

Show more, tell less: that’s my general recommendation here, based on a reading of the opening chapter. Below are my reactions as I read (hope I say something helpful) … Really boring opening sentence. (And there is so much nasty, hence vivid, material you could’ve led with instead!) The paper cu... view book

I just finished reading every chapter you've posted, Bradley. This character is up my alley as I'm fascinated by savants to the extent that I've read Oliver Sacks. But even if that weren't the case I would still think what you've achieved thus far in the novel is special. You're allowing readers to ... view book

Hi, Jared. Lovely prologue, meaning it was a chilling way to start a novel, with a gripping dramatic question posed: Will Marcus make good on this threat. (On the downside the hair grip action confused me a tad. I’d take another pass at writing the action sequence.) But why would a psychopath fixate... view book