I read chapters 2 and 3- I liked Ruby, and Chrys had potential. (He's slightly annoying now, but we'll see how he develops over the story.) You mentioned her parents a little, but were they ordered to take her to the counselor by the school? Were they frustrated/Worried? Also, I know I'm not s... view book

I read Chapter 1 and part of chapter 2 I liked the boy Tristan and how you portrayed him. I also liked how you played the part of otherness with his hair and Sarah's eyes. Some minor nitpicks: He ball curved and flew like a bullet….The ball curved. Leave because “you sat an exam.”.....But I tho... view book

I read chapters 10 and 11. I liked it, although I was a little surprised at the new group of characters I felt like I was introduced to in chapter 11. I thought we would have met all the character groups by this point in the story. Some nitpicks: Toungue tied-was the older sister really toungu... view book

I only read chapter 1, but I liked the story the girl told. Some nitpicks And so it was that she grew into the curious little girl with the white hair so lovingly caressed into the world soley by her father Lucien. (awkward sentence) The sky was dark, which made it easy for her to see the con... view book

I enjoyed the book. You did a good job with the timing and pace of the story. Some nitpicks… I thought your short pitch could be better. It was too advanced for the level of people who would be reading your book. I would make it more about him becoming a guardian vs just jumping ahead in his d... view book