oh! and I forgot to add that you sometimes shift point of view without meaning to, like telling us Jim's thoughts made him feel ill when we were still with the cop's pov at the time. and doing the "dun dun duuuun" bits like "little did they know" gives it more of a cheesy than menacing air, at least... view book

this is really, very good! I thoroughly enjoyed all of it! the characters are interesting, your future timeline plausible (if disturbing) and the gadgets fit in seamlessly. the things that nag at me a bit is your murder timeline and waiting to introduce Adams. with the murder, it's that when... view book

Hi there! So, I only read the first two chapters, but I liked what I saw. The problem is you have zero description. I don't know what this world or the characters look like, nor their internal landscape for that matter. I don't have any sense of anything, really, except the characters' temperaments ... view book

OMG the TRUCK! *dies laughing* that was awwwesome! *ahem* okay. time for comments. ;o) this is really, really good! witty banter, non-fainting heroine mocking fainting heroines who balk at the wrong moment, and a not-quite giant (and gorgeous) kidnapper who can practically read minds! the sto... view book

chapter one didn't load properly. there's nothing to read when I try it. view book