This is a good idea, and it's nicely done for the most part. I'd lose some of the redundant reflexives, but the grammar and syntax are essentially correct. I'd continue to read this, but I do fear for your readership in at least one regard. You've given yourself a hell of a task. For those of us ... view book

Bulb by Bradley Wind I read all that you have here of “Bulb”, and, just for once, I’m not entirely sure what to say. This is a bit all over the place at the moment, switching between too many characters, locations and events, so a little more discipline on this front would be nice. On the othe... view book

Of course I had to shelve this; you know what a clerihew is! Now for a sestina, if you please. Seriously, I'll make a comment when I have the chance to read more. Best, Addy view book

I think the new chapters move the story on nicely, and the ensemble is beginning to come together now. Splendid. Shelved. Addy view book

I'm going to give this a turn on my shelf. Some of the sentences do have several clauses, but the punctuation is conventional and correct, so I had no problem understanding what you were doing. In fact, this was smart and quick-witted, which is rare for so-called YA. I wouldn't bother too much ab... view book