about me

Multi-talented sex god and bringer of joy.

My only failing: a lifelong (and inexplicable) inability to tear along perforations. Every stamp, every tax disc, has been mutilated beyond the possibility of usage.



I like to back and encourage writers who I think show potential, or whose writing has enriched my day. When I review a book I always give my honest opinion, regardless of whether it costs me the goodwill of the author. If this makes me the Simon Cowell of the Authonomy site, then feel free to boo.

Right, 'nuff about me. A bit about the books:


THE ANNALS OF "SCRIBES" is the transcript of a recent Forum thread. Posts are largely reproduced in chronological order, adjusted only where necessary to provide clarity. Some slight editing to a few posts was necessary for the same reason.

Authonomites posted as themselves, with the exception of Ferret, who graciously played throughout the part of Her Majesty Queen Victoria. Ariom Dahl appeared as the sinister Lucrezia Borgia. Apart from playing the part of Sir Richard, I also appeared, through a borrowed account, as Sir Perceval. There were a few posts by be-Socked persons.

Thanks are due to everyone who contributed to the thread (even the Socks and Trolls – nothing is ever wasted), but particular appreciation must be paid to Norton Stone, whose flights of surreal fancy have had the Editor weeping with laughter on several occasions, and kept poor, beleaguered Sir Richard constantly on his toes.

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THE SEX STONE OF AGASSIA is not pure comedy, but a farce with sad bits. Expect to meet unrealistic characters -- caricatures, even -- and a credibility-stretched plot. The retro narrative style is deliberate, as is the inordinate length of the book, and the story arc is second only to the Sydney Harbour Bridge in the width of its span.

It's not a linear story. The chapters move back and forth in time, with switches in writing style and tempo. It's seen, to a large extent, from the perspective of minor characters, each one of whom is the centre point of his own world, and thus behaves accordingly. And it's this behaviour that creates the story. Cause and effect.

The storyline is designed to keep the reader baffled as to the significance of the various episodes, until the final chapter when -- like one of Rolf Harris's paintings -- you look at it upside down and can see that it's not a cat with a kipper after all, but a portrait of the late Queen Mother. But it all becomes clear on the last page. Promise.

The Sex Stone of Agassia is composed of several discrete strands -- some farcical, some tragic -- which occasionally cross over each other. When they do, another link in a long chain of misinterpretation and serendipitous causality is irrevocably forged.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

favourite books

The Young Visiters (sic) -- Daisy Ashford

my websites