I like the idea of this story. Im having a hard time understanding whats going on in this first chapter. The voice of each character seems to blend together and i find myself having to back up and re- read each section. I think a thorough revision in grammar and punctuation could clear a lot of it u... view book

I want more! I want to know what happens next! What a great idea,im lovin it. I find myself wanting lena to be a little more likeable or maybe just wittier. I feel like as the main character she should be easier to identify with. view book

I really like the idea behind your story. great pitch, really got me excited to start reading. I find in my own writing that my mind moves faster than my pen and I feel there are times in your story when maybe you have done the same thing. it seems there are times when the story lacks detail. it mak... view book