I've gotten through Chapter three and I am really enjoying the story so far. It reminds me of a modern day Victoria Holt or Phyllis Whitney time romantic suspense. I like Katie and I'm identifying with her already. A few recomendations. Your blurb is a little too informative. I would leave a li... view book

Kelsey, MUCH BETTER. Now you've hooked me. You have good action here and when i get to the first chapter I realize that this was something I needed to know before the book begins. Something I can think back on and wonder where Cecilia got off too. Nicely done!! view book

I'm not quite done with this yet but Im enraptured. This is lovely. Well written with the exception of some passive voice that can easily be repaired in the editing process. Watch your had beens and was's. They steal your action right out of your story. Instead of saying "had been looking" use ... view book

Here are my thoughts on prologues in general. A prologue is something that comes before the story. What you have here is back story. It is the history of your kingdom and If you want a reader to stick with your book you need to get rid of this and place your hook in your first chapter. What is i... view book

I've only read through the third chapter but I wanted to make a few comments before I move on. I generally do not like prologues but this one seems fitting to the story. I do think you've repeated the line about the old woman too many times. I think you could make it more creative. You are writ... view book