The Summoner by L.A. Sombra

What happens when we die? We wake from the dream.

After her death, Kelly wakes to discover that her life was merely a dream. Learning to live in her new, seemingly perfect world is fairly easy...until her new life is taken away.

A story of love, betrayal, self-discovery and adventure, The Summoner will take you for an unexpected ride through a fantastical world of danger and beauty.

I've invented the creatures and races involved in my world. I also invented a language, Thiemovi, which the MC must learn. Hope you enjoy and I welcome any crits you might have :)

Formerly known as Awake From the Life Dream

This book is complete, but the chapters that aren't uploaded are currently backed up in an external hard drive until I get a new computer! They need edited, but I plan to go ahead and upload them anyway.

  • Classification: Moderate
  • Work is: Extract only on Authonomy
  • First submitted Feb. 20, 2009
  • Last updated Feb. 20, 2009
The Summoner
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  • Peter Peverelli's avatar
    Peter Peverelli wrote 2 years, 10 months ago
    I started reading Chapter 1 out of curiosity, after reading the introduction. I like this genre. That chapter made me even more curious about what would happen next. However, the story gradually seems to lose a main line in its narrative. What is this story about? If there is one thing all winning books in this genre have in common, it is that they all want to say something, though they never say so verbatim. Stephen King is probably the ...
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  • Mach100's avatar
    Mach100 wrote 3 years, 10 months ago
    Hello Jenny, I read somewhere that it’s not good form to use contractions in narrative. Apparently, it’s OK to use in speech. So things like would’ve, she’d, wasn’t, etc should be reserved for dialogue only and the full words should be used in the text. I used to do it too but I forced myself to change. It might have been an editor or one of the scores of reject letters I’ve had - ha, ha. “She pulled on her ...
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  • Teeny Tiny Tambo's avatar
    Teeny Tiny Tambo wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    This book had a really interesting and fresh concept. I liked how you dropped the reader right into turmoil from the first chapter, then immediately entered another world full of fantasy and mystery. Your descriptions are good and create a very believeable world. Also, I liked Kelly. Even when she landed in a world she had no idea about she didn't get all hysterical - or just accept it. I thought that sometimes you tended to let the characters thoughts ...
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  • healthpolicymaven's avatar
    healthpolicymaven wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    This book is off to a good start, but I think more of it needs to be here for my backing. What I liked about it was a different playful take on what happens after death. And the dream sequence almost has a Buddhist flair, but the language seems to be Yiddish. I encourage you to continue to develop this and update me as you load more chapters. I read the first two chapters and the last one. I also ...
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  • Gamer_2k4's avatar
    Gamer_2k4 wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    Alright, I've read through the first five chapters, and I like what I see so far. Here are my thoughts. Chapter 1: I think someone else mentioned this, but unless the fencing is foreshadowing something else in the story (Kelly becoming skilled in swordsmanship or something), leave it out and start at the airport. No need to distract us from the plot with trivialities like that. Concerning the flight itself, it seems odd that the plane has three engines; to ...
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  • kiwigirl2011's avatar
    kiwigirl2011 wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    You have to be pretty clever to invent a whole new world, race of beings and a language, AND make it both believable and uncomplicated to read - and you've nailed it :-) This sort of thing could so easily be confusing but it's not at all. Such an original idea. Only part that grated on me (and this is a teensy tiny thing) is when she went to the toilet and smiled and made her secret joke about being ...
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  • MIRO1K's avatar
    MIRO1K wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    Dear L.A, (A BHCG review) Wow -this a truly bewitching tale -you have a mesmerising way with description of scenes and great skill in injecting pace and atmosphere into your plot -to be honest it's difficult to stop reading your story -it's almost hypnotic! Your imagination is wonderful -and your instincts in including details which linger in the imagination are spot on. The scenes where she is floating above her funeral and in the new land or sphere are very ...
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  • Shadowchime's avatar
    Shadowchime wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    Hiya What you have here is original, fresh, and exciting. I love the fact that you made life just a dream, and there is really more after death. This is well written and doesn't have any things to comment about other than the fact that it has a lot of promise. The only thing I would suggest is to maybe explain what the other language is earlier, for the readers, maybe not the character, but at least so we know ...
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  • kiwigirl2011's avatar
    kiwigirl2011 wrote 3 years, 11 months ago

    I think the opening is good :-) I did think for a second it was a real battle until the phone went off, then I thought she was maybe playing a playstation game or something until the dialgoue started. You describe the plane crash in graphic detail so I can picture it as it happens. Very well written and I look forward to reading more :-)

  • LaSombra's avatar
    LaSombra Author wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    Thank you so much for your comments :) I hadn't thought of starting at the airport... hm. Well, I suppose it's possible. It's just that I kinda wanted to start it out by tricking the reader for just a second into thinking it was a real battle scene in a fantasy and then totally being cut off by the cell phone. Does it come across that way or just look dumb? Also never thought about Portland Maine! It is supposed ...
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  • Emily M's avatar
    Emily M wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    This is a really original idea for a story. I love fantasy but I can't write it. I always admire those who can. I read the first four chapters and found them to be quite good. Your first chapter starts off with a bang; you do an excellent job of describing the plane crash in progress. In the second chapter you introduce Kelly's new (old) life as she awakes from the dream. I like how you introduce a different language...it ...
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  • Bill Scott's avatar
    Bill Scott wrote 3 years, 11 months ago
    L.A. I lay in bed last night unable to sleep thinking about your plane scene. How long does it take a plane to fall from the sky. What does it look like inside as it's happening? Do you lose consciousness before you hit the ground or is it just terror then blackness? I think you did a good job answering these. I hope I forget this passage before I f=get on my next plane? The giant cat, the lavender arms, ...
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  • LaSombra's avatar
    LaSombra Author wrote 3 years, 12 months ago
    I know what you mean. I wish I had the time to go through everyone's books like that! I'm in the middle of reading the latest George RR Martin book (A Dance with Dragons) right now also. I do like reading books on here, but it's more like work when I have that book calling my name :) [QUOTE] Ch 4 "a great mill worked on the river" this sounds like the mill itself was working on the river. suggestion: ...
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  • Retired user
    D M Sharples [Retired] wrote 3 years, 12 months ago
    This opens with an event that is well told and easy to imagine, certainly for anyone who's ever been on a plane. Your description is smooth and not laden with adjectives, making it easy to read and conjure up the required images. There is then a well executed transition to the other/real world of Kelly's and, particularly through the use of a foreign language, the reader then shares her confusion, empathising and so wanting to read on. Other than a ...
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  • Retired user
    Rebecca Tester wrote 4 years ago

    Could use a few more dialogue tags in chap 2 when Laura and Kelly are discussing the dream--feels a bit 'talking head syndrome'

  • Retired user
    Rebecca Tester wrote 4 years ago

    Rargh, not sure why it only lets me see the first chapter. I actually came here to help you with the love scene in chap 8 ;-)

    Neat premise. I've worked it into a couple D&D games but not on this level. Seems like you're handling it pretty well in the first chapter though the narrative distance seems kinda choppy with the breakaways for all of her thought-sclamations(!).

  • Retired user
    Rebecca Tester wrote 4 years ago

    Might be a nice idea to put the dream sequence in italics and put a few ***s in the breaks

  • Retired user
    Rebecca Tester wrote 4 years ago

    Might be a nice idea to put the dream sequence in italics and put a few ***s in the breaks

  • Kenneth Edward Lim's avatar
    Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 4 years ago

    L.A.,
    What a ride, first inside Kelly's head as she experiences a plane crash, then in a strange new world into which she's awakened. "The Summoner" is truly unusual based on the premise that life is a dream one eventually wakes up from, reality being in an afterlife. Your descriptives are clear-cut giving the scenes and action in your narrative clean delineation, easy to follow and enjoy. Thank you so much.

    Kenneth Edward Lim
    The North Korean

  • LaSombra's avatar
    LaSombra Author wrote 4 years ago

    I plan to edit these first 10 chapters again in the coming days or weeks so any suggestions are greatly appreciated. I do not get offended by criticism. I also plan to do a rewrite of the remaining chapters whenever I get the chance. I will post them as they get rewritten. Thanks in advance to those who read and critique!